A/N: Oh my GOSH I am so sorry for the delay in this chapter. I hope you all don't hate me now...Had a small Vegas vacation interfere with writing. Anyway, I'm back on track now, and already have chapter 7 in the outline stages.

Once again, thank you to the lovely Tarante11a for her editing skills.

Chapter 6: Old Friends

Elle sat in the bow of the ferry as they approached the Circle Tower, which looked as gloomy and formidable as always. She cringed as she recalled her first time entering the enclave, forced there by a Grey Warden treaty and Arlessa Isolde's desperation. The templars' fear had been a palpable thing, and the air had been thick with the stench of blood and burned flesh. She'd never wanted to return, yet once again necessity was drawing her back. Wynne had written, so Elle knew the Circle was rebuilding quickly with help from the Circles of Orlais and the Free Marches. First Enchanter Irving had retired and passed his staff to Wynne, who had spent six months advising Queen Anora before returning to the Tower. Still, the thought of entering that place again made Elle uneasy.

She shuddered involuntarily as she recalled the countless abominations she'd had to slay. To think they had once been people, mages like Wynne or apprentices like Connor, made the idea of them almost as horrible as darkspawn. Adrift in disturbing memories, she jumped when she felt Leo nudge her leg. She turned away from the Tower looming in her vision, only to find Teagan looking at her with concern.

"Are you all right, Elle? You looked a little..." He paused, as if searching for the right word. "...lost there."

She flushed and shook her head. "I'll be fine." She realized then just how little he probably knew about her struggle to end the blight. She smiled grimly when his expression didn't change. "I suppose that wasn't really a 'yes', was it? We never fully revealed to you and Eamon what had happened here when we came seeking the aid of the mages last year." Elle sighed, knowing that the story would possibly erode Teagan's faith in the Circle's ability to raise and train his nephew, but she felt she owed him some form of explanation.

As the boat made its way across the lake, Elle told Teagan about her first foray into the Circle Tower. She tried to emphasize the positives of the experience: meeting Wynne, the heroism of Niall and the mages who held out against Uldred, Knight-Commander Greagoir's trust in her abilities. She didn't spare him the details of the blood magic and the abominations – he had witnessed Connor's possession, after all – but she downplayed her visceral reaction to all she'd seen. She doubted Teagan would want to hear about her vomiting in a dusty corner of the tower upon awakening to the destruction one sloth demon could wreak.

Elle shivered as she spoke of being lost in the Fade, wandering alone, trying to work out the puzzles created by both demons and her own mind. It was hard to describe the experience, especially since she'd found it more frightening than any taint-induced dream of darkspawn. She trailed off and gazed again across the lake, not realizing she'd grown quiet. Teagan's hand on her forearm caused her to start. To her surprise, a flash of warmth radiated through her at his touch, and for a fleeting moment she felt the comfort he was offering.

She was embarrassed to be distracted by bad memories and discomfited by the sense of safety Teagan's small gesture had induced. "I'm sorry. It's just... I mean, I don't..." Elle lifted her eyes to meet his gaze as her voice dropped to nearly a whisper.

"It was terrifying, Teagan. Not the demons, but the sense that I was trapped and disoriented at the same time. Killing darkspawn and ending the blight was so straightforward compared to that...that aimlessness. The fear of being lost there forever was... It was a horrible feeling. And it was lonely. I came to understand how much I depended on my friends for support, especially Alistair. I...I think that was the point I realized I truly loved him." She stopped, astonished to find that as she was talking, she had taken Teagan's hand and was gripping it tightly. He was looking at her with a mixture of warmth and sympathy and amazingly, she saw no hint of judgment in his eyes.

Elle blushed as she quickly let go. An apology was on the tip of her tongue when the ferryman pushed the boat ashore and announced their arrival. She grabbed her pack and stood, hurrying to climb out of the ferry before Teagan could offer help. With a small gesture, she told Leo to wait for them in the boat then started up the beach toward the Tower entrance.

Thinking about what she'd told Teagan on the crossing, Elle wondered at herself for allowing him to see her so weak and scared. It was rare for her to show vulnerability to anyone. As they walked up the stairs to the giant double doors leading into the Circle Tower, Elle was preoccupied with the bewildering understanding that she actually trusted Teagan. The doors swung open and she felt a small stab of guilt as she belatedly realized her mention of Alistair hadn't brought about the intense sadness she was used to feeling whenever he crossed her mind.

She didn't have time to contemplate this, as Wynne rushed to greet them as soon as they set foot in the main hall. She grasped Elle's hands and smiled warmly.

"It is good to see you, my dear. And Bann Teagan, what a pleasant surprise." Wynne tempered her smile when she saw the serious look on Elle's face. "But I can see you aren't here for an idle visit. What's happened?"

Elle's words came out in a rush, apprehension over past memories forgotten, replaced by renewed worry for her brother. "Fergus was badly injured, and we need a healer. The leader of Highever's alienage is seeing to him now, keeping him alive, but she doesn't have the skill needed to mend the wound. Please, Wynne, we need a mage. We rode here as fast as we could. He can't die! I need him...Ferelden needs him!

Wynne patted her hand. "Calm down and tell me what happened."

Elle allowed Teagan to explain the circumstances surrounding Fergus's wound as Wynne listened attentively. While Teagan was talking, Knight-Commander Greagoir joined them, and gave Elle a terse smile.

"Of course we'll help you, Elle," Wynne said when Teagan was finished. "I'll pack some things right away and we can leave shortly. We should be able to..."

Greagoir broke in, and Elle noticed him place his hand on the the small of Wynne's back. "Wynne, perhaps you should consider sending someone else this time. The need sounds urgent, and the healer who accompanies them will need to be a proficient rider in order to keep up. Besides, there are many pressing matters here. The Circle needs its First Enchanter."

Wynne sighed and gave Greagoir an indecipherable look. "Perhaps the Knight-Commander is right, Elle. I'm not entirely sure my old bones could handle a forced ride to Highever. Perhaps Kinnan, who you met a year ago, would be more appropriate. I believe he had some equestrian training when he was a child, and he is an excellent healer as well." She looked around and found an apprentice who was trying to look busy and made a motion. "Liandra, please go find Kinnan and have him meet me in my office as soon as he can."

As they made their way upstairs to the First Enchanter's office, Elle gazed around the rebuilt tower. The mages and templars had been busy over the past year, and the halls showed little trace of the devastation that blood magic and demons had wrought. She relaxed a little, glad to see that Wynne and Greagoir apparently had everything under control.

They were chatting about the mages sent from Orlais when Elle heard a familiar voice from one of the apprentice bunkrooms.

"Oh my goodness, it's YOU! I can't believe you're here! I'm so glad to see you! By the stone, the Circle Tower is amazing! It's been a year and I still haven't made it through the 'C' section of the library. I never knew there could be so many books in one place in my life! Thank you so much for helping me come here, I'm learning so much!"

"Hello, Dagna. It's good to see you, as well. I trust you're adjusting to life here in the Tower? I hope it is everything you expected." Elle chuckled, glad to see that the dwarven girl's natural enthusiasm remained undamaged by her time at the Circle.

Dagna grinned and clapped her hands together. "Oh, my lady, you have no idea! This is where I'm meant to be, I just know it! I've already had so many ideas for areas of research, especially about lyrium and its effects on mages and its connection to the Fade. There's just so much to know! For example, did you know that..."

Wynne laughed and broke in, putting her hand on Dagna's shoulder. "Dagna, my dear, I'm sure Elle would love to catch up, but we have to attend to an urgent matter in my office."

Dagna was undaunted. "Oh, I understand! I have reading to do anyway. I found a really interesting book on cantrips that I've just started studying, I'll get back to it! It was so good to see you!" She turned and ran back toward the library, whistling a tune Elle didn't recognize.

Elle smiled and shook her head, then turned to Teagan, who was looking after Dagna with an expression of bewilderment. She explained how they had found Dagna and why she was at the Circle Tower. Greagoir commented on how much she had helped during the rebuilding, not only with the physical labor but with spreading good cheer during an undeniably difficult time. The girl's enthusiasm was infectious, and Elle found herself in good spirits as they entered Wynne's office, despite the circumstances for their visit.

Kinnan was waiting for them, and Elle recognized him as one of the mages who had been trapped in the Tower with Wynne during Uldred's uprising. He nodded to her and stood to the side of the desk, waiting for instructions. Upon hearing the situation, he readily agreed to accompany them to Highever, and with a small bow he left the office to gather his belongings.

Teagan looked uncomfortable and cleared his throat, catching Elle's eyes as he did. She recalled his request and nodded, turning to Greagoir.

"Ser, Bann Teagan and I have a request, one that I hope you find it within your heart to grant. It's been over a year since the events in Redcliffe, and just over eleven months since Connor Guerrin was sent here to train. We were hoping for a chance to see him while we are here. I would like to see how he is, and Teagan would like to visit with his nephew for a few minutes."

Greagoir's face had grown stony, and Elle could tell he was about to answer negatively when Wynne chimed in. "Of course you may see Connor. I'm sure Knight-Commander Greagoir has no objections. Things are changing a bit at the Tower now that I am First Enchanter. We both agree that too much isolation may have been partly to blame for the events of last year, and I...we are working to change that policy. Family visits are only a small step toward my goal." Wynne smiled sweetly at Greagoir and his countenance softened. Suddenly Elle was struck by a suspicion that there might be more to their relationship than that of prisoner to jailor.

With a sigh, Greagoir nodded. "All right. I'll go collect him myself." He left the office and Elle looked at Wynne with a sly smile.

"Wynne, is there something you're not telling me?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, my dear," the elder mage said innocently. It was impossible not to see the twinkle in her eye, though.

Teagan laughed and turned to Elle. "Remind me not to play cards with any mages in the future. Your friend is clever indeed."

"And powerful, young man. Very powerful. You have no idea!" Wynne could barely disguise the mirth in her voice. "But I see I can't have secrets from you, Elle. It would be such a scandal if the Chantry should learn the First Enchanter of Ferelden's Circle of Magi and the Templar Knight-Commander of said Circle were carrying on a..." Her mouth snapped shut as the door to the office opened.

Greagoir stepped into the room, leading a frightened-looking Connor. When he saw Teagan, Connor visibly relaxed and ran to him, practically throwing himself into his uncle's embrace. Elle smiled at the reunion and moved with Wynne to the opposite corner of the room. Greagoir stood by the door, ever watchful of the young apprentice.

"How is he doing?" Elle asked quietly.

"Oh, he's very intelligent, but also very reserved – understandable, after going through all that he did. We are trying to bring him out of his shell. Do you remember Petra? We've assigned her to be his mentor, and I think it's working out well. Though, I think it is good that he is able to see his uncle, even for a short time." Wynne smiled at the sight of Teagan on one knee, talking to Connor, then asked the question Elle knew she would. "Speaking of Bann Teagan, is it normal for landed nobility to ride willy-nilly around the countryside? Why is he here with you?"

Elle chuckled. "Ah, Wynne, you do get right to the point. And lest you forget, I am also of noble blood, though I suppose it's the lot of a Grey Warden, noble or not, to be forced to ride willy-nilly around the countryside. As for Bann Teagan, he claims to feel guilty over encouraging Fergus to hunt boar, but I think he really wanted to see Connor."

"Ah, those are the only reasons, then? I see." A small smile played at the corners of Wynne's mouth, and Elle silently cursed the old mage's uncanny perception.

Elle studied her boots intently as Wynne continued. "My dear, I will confess that I've been worried about you. Despite the circumstances, it is a positive thing that you are out of that castle for a time. I know how it is to lose someone you love, but I also know that it does no good to live in the past. It's a hard thing to hear, but the best – and most difficult – thing to do is to decide to move on." Wynne placed her hand on Elle's shoulder and turned her attention back to Teagan and Connor.

Elle looked at her old friend with shining eyes, her voice barely a whisper. "I know you're right, Wynne, but I don't know if I'm ready. I don't even know how to know if I'm ready. I think about going to join the Wardens at Amaranthine and I'm so frozen with fear that I can barely move. I don't know if I can face the inevitable memories and impressions being there will foster. Even now, I know I'm going to be forced to ride to Denerim to represent Fergus at the Landsmeet, and I'm terrified. It's like...Alistair made me whole, and now that he's gone, I'm not really human anymore..." She trailed off, struggling to hold back tears.

"Oh, child, all of that is normal, you know. Which of course means that you are human." Wynne took Elle's hands in her own. "And yet, I saw you smiling, even in the face of fear for your brother. I think you are stronger than you know. Perhaps you just needed something to dislodge you from the rock you've been hiding under. Or...perhaps someone?" The twinkle returned to the mage's eyes and she looked pointedly at Teagan.

Elle blushed and looked away. "I...I think you have the wrong..." A knock at the door cut her off, and she thanked the Maker for Kinnan's impeccable timing.

"I'm ready to ride when you are, my lady," said the younger mage with a small bow. "The Circle keeps a small stable of horses on the mainland side of the lake, we will just need to stop there so I can procure a mount, then we can be on our way."

Elle nodded and moved over to where Teagan was talking to Connor. She hated to interrupt, but as time was of the essence, she placed her hand on Teagan's shoulder to indicate it was time to leave. He said goodbye and gave Connor another hug, then stood and turned to Wynne and Greagoir.

"Thank you both, truly. I am glad to see that Connor is healthy and beginning to adjust to his life here. I'll inform Eamon and Isolde that their son is in good hands."

"You're quite welcome, Bann Teagan." Wynne smiled and glanced at Connor. "You may also inform them that should they wish to visit, the doors to the Tower are open to them. I hope Connor can be a shining example of a new breed of mage, one that isn't so shut off from the world. Come then, we'll walk with you to the main hall."

Connor took Teagan's hand as they left the office, clearly thankful for the short visit with his uncle, but sad that he had to leave so soon. "Will I see Father soon, do you think? I would like to show him what I do here."

Teagan smiled down at the boy. "I hope so, Connor. I think your parents will come now that they know it is permissible for them to do so."

The group continued in silence to the doors of the Tower. As Teagan said goodbye to Connor, Elle bowed to Greagoir then turned to Wynne, who stepped forward to embrace her. "It was good to see you, Elle, if even for so short a time." Under her breath she added, "He's a good man, Elle. Think about it."

Elle pulled away, slightly shocked, and saw the mirth in Wynne's eyes again. She couldn't help blushing, but she smiled at her old friend despite her discomfort. A random memory from their travels together came to her then, and she repeated Alistair's words quietly. "I hate you. You're a bad person."

Wynne snorted with laughter and waved her away. "Get going, then. The Teyrn of Highever is too important to risk by standing around making small talk. Bann Teagan, it was a pleasure to see you again, and please send my regards to Arl Eamon and his wife. My prayers will be with you."

With that, the giant doors of the Circle Tower closed behind them, and they made their way down to the ferry landing, where the boat was waiting to take them back to the other shore.