Chapter Four: Tama-chan's Little Mistake

A/N: Hey. This is Blue, the awesome authoress. (You probably already know that). Anyway, I've been getting lots of wonderful reviews, and they've really cheered me up. Not to make up any excuses, but between this and that I've found it very hard to squeeze in writing this story. So I want to reward you for your patience, and here's a new chapter! Thank you to anyone who reviewed, I appreciate very much.

Stay tuned!

Tamaki's POV

Since Lenalee brought us to the dining hall,it's been thirty minutes; thirty minutes of irrevocably, spontaneously, horribly, incredibly, outrageously vile torture.

My whole life, I've always felt like a prince. Or acted like one, at least. Here, I can't even speak to anyone like the courteous blue-blood I am without being insulted or cut off!

For example, Kanda, the person who'd almost succeeded in killing the fantastic young man who I myself am. Even though we'd been off to a bad start, I still wanted to be friendly. So at lunch, I walked straight up to Kanda, and stated, "you have beautiful, hair, my princess."

Kanda looked shocked. The chopsticks she was eating soba with dropped from her hand.

"A maiden like you is really lovely. Why carry that blade around all the time? It's rather frightening. A beautiful girl like you shouldn't be trying to ward people off!" I suggested, walking closer and smiling.

Huge mistake.

"SHUT UP!"

Instantly, Kanda whipped out that sword on me. "Don't... you idiotic, hopelessly idiotic...! I'll kill you, I really mean it!"

I cowered, throwing my hands out in a useless way of protection. "Please, no! Why are you trying to hurt me again, dearest? You really are too intimidating!"

"Because I'm a man, that's why, godamnit!" he snarled.

I blinked. "Ohhhh..."

So that was the reason Kanda had a deep voice...

And a muscular build...

And an utter lack of social etiquette...

And a man's name. Yet he had a very feminine face and well-groomed long hair.

"Uh, sorry?" is what I managed.

"Perhaps the beansprout has finally found someone even more idiotic than he himself is. How incredibly stupid you are," Kanda said sourly.

"Why does everyone say that to me?" I wondered, crossing my arms and pouting.

"And, don't call me dearest, you moron! Only Allen—" he trailed off, lowering his blade.

Staring at him with wide violet eyes, I asked smoothly, "what about Allen? Hmm?"

"Forget it," Kanda snapped, his face a mask of fury and the heat risen to his cheeks. It was the most emotional I've seen him.

"Do you like Allen? I... I didn't know you were that kind of man, Kanda Yu." I said, smirking triumphantly.

That did it. Kanda snapped. He lunged toward me almost at the speed of light, and I stifled a scream.

"Yu-chan! No need to kill anyone!" a cheery voice exclaimed.

Relief flooded my mind. Looking up, I saw Lavi standing between Kanda and I.

"Yu, relax! He wasn't accusing you of not being straight!" Lavi laughed nervously. "Now calm down."

"Rabbit... do you think I am an idiot? I know exactly what Suou Tamaki was accusing me of. No need to lie about the obvious. Suou will pay for his words," Kanda swore. His narrow cobalt eyes were glinting, glaring. The man was a true samurai, even if his sexuality could be questioned (in my opinion, well, of course there's nothing wrong with that) and I'd mistook him for a girl.

"Not here, Yu. There are many people watching you here in the dining hall. If you want to kill Suou Tamaki I'm afraid you'll have to take it outside," Lavi whispered fiercely, grabbing onto the fabric in the front of Kanda's uniform.

"Forget it," Kanda muttered angrily. Pulling away from Lavi, he withdrew his sword from its position and left a bowl of unfinished soba on the table.

Suddenly, Allen was there. "Think he'll come back for this? I'm starved!"

"Sure Allen, go ahead and take it," Lavi said. Happily, Allen dove into the soba and in a split second it was gone.

My jaw dropped. "A- Allen?"

"Tamaki!" I heard Kyouya call.

I felt like a puppy whose ears perked up at the sound of its owner's voice. Across the room, I skipped toward Kyouya.

"There are a few people who want to meet you. Come with me, Tamaki," Kyouya informed me. We walked out into the hallway. There stood a Chinese man in his early thirties perhaps, in a white lab coat, a very stylish beret, and a gleam similar to Kyouya's in his glasses.

"Welcome, Suou Tamaki. My name is Lee Komui," Komui introduced, shaking my hand warmly. "I understand that you've already met a bunch of my exorcists."

"A few: Lavi, Allen Walker, Lenalee Lee, Yu Kanda," Kyouya said.

"And my sister gave you a tour around headquarters?"

"Your sister is Lenalee Lee correct? Then she did give us a tour," I told him. The family resemblance was clear between the two— to me, at least.

"Good. Time to meet Hevlaska, then," Komui said. "Follow me."

"Who's Hevlaska?" I asked.

Chuckling, Komui started walking forward. "You'll find out soon enough."

Kyouya and I exchanged glances.

Of course, I was the one compatible with the innocence-thingy and Kyouya wasn't.

"Don't be jealous. It's only to be expected of I, the man who has everything," I proclaimed after leaving Hevlaska's and getting over the fact that she was a giant white thing.

Kyouya acted nonchalant. "Suit yourself, Tamaki. This innocence talk Komui explained is completely nonsensical, and I refuse to believe it. The people here aren't sane, so we'll have to escape as soon as possible."

"But... the food! Jeryy, the chef at the dining hall, can make anything we want to eat at any time, ever! Anything! Anything!" I protested.

"Tamaki, your father is an extremely wealthy man. At home you can eat whatever you want whenever you want also," Kyouya stated bluntly, rolling his eyes. "I swear, this is all just some sick joke. A well-planned, almost plausible sick joke for that matter."

"No, Kyouya It's not a joke!

"Yes, it is."

"Oh, really? How can you explain Hevlaska?"

"Hologram."

"Komui's giant robot!"

"It wasn't moving, was it, now?"

"The scenery! Nineteenth-century England!"

"Someone moved us to some historic site in England when we were sleeping, I presume. Why is beyond me."

"Allen Walker's white hair!"

"Have you heard of hair coloring, Tamaki?"

"Kanda's moving at the speed of light?"

"Many years of training."

"The demons!"

"Tamaki, we haven't even seen any demons. I'll be a monkey's uncle if there's a demon attack right now, or ever," Kyouya said.

Just then a loud, screeching siren went off. "A demon's attacking!" people began to yell.

"You predicted it," I told Kyouya.

"Whatever. Let's see this demon now!" Kyouya growled, crossing his arms.

A large, round shape was growing closer and closer in the distance. Then the most hideous thing I'd ever seen was hovering behind Kyouya.

"Erm, Kyouya?" I murmured weakly, taking a few steps back.

"What?" he snapped.

"B- behind you," I stuttered.

Kyouya whirled around and we both stared in disbelief at the mysterious, ugly creature.