Well, here it is! The final Chapter!

I hope you had as much fun reading this as I did writing it

Enjoy!

Chapter Sixteen: Of Meat and Marble

The moment was finally here.

All those years of planning, organizing (which was nothing short of a miracle for me), listening to and solving problems - it all was about to pay off. Sam and Freddie were getting married.

The ceremony went about as well as anyone could have hoped. Carly freaked out at first over Freddie and Sam wearing their normal clothes, but understood once I explained the situation. Gibby took it as his cue to promptly remove his shirt, though he left on his tie, cuffs and cumber bun. Something's not quite right with that one…

Sam insisted that I walk her down the aisle, saying that I had been the closest thing to a father figure she had. I really couldn't disagree. I had always looked at Sam like a sister, and definitely cared about her as such. It felt only natural to be the one giving her away.

Especially since I was behind it all.

I won't go into to much detail on the ceremony, mostly because I zoned out not too far into it thinking about what I would say when I gave my toast. Mrs. Benson cried her head off, Carly had a huge smile on her face the entire time, and everyone laughed when Gibby had to retrieve his jacket that had the rings in the pocket. That's about all I remember until 'You may now kiss the bride'.

It took longer than I would have liked to get everyone settled down for the reception. Eventually Ted stood up and demanded silence in a booming voice, and the room fell hush. There was an awkward moment of silence, then I slowly stood up.

"Uh…I would like to make a toast…" I said, tapping my fork against my glass. I guess I tapped a teeny bit too hard because the glass shattered into a million bits on the third tap. Well, at least I had everyone's attention.

"Um…first I want to apologize for taking the life of that innocent glass.." there were laughs throughout the room. "Yeah, I knew you'd chuckle…anyway, I'd like to say a few words about the happy couple. My friends, Sam and Freddie. " I looked over to them and grinned. Their faces were beaming. At least Freddie's was. Sam's was already buried in a piece of ham. Some things never change.

"Over the years, I've come to see these two as family - mostly because they always seemed to be on my couch." More laughter…man, I was killing! "You were my little sister's best friends, and became some of my closest friends too. Knowing you and watching you grow has been an amazing experience I wouldn't trade for the world, not even if a magic meatball told me to. You've made my life fun, which is all anyone can ask for. So here's to Sam and Freddie for being the best family a guy could have!"

I raised my broken glass and everyone else joined, clinking their drinks together and voicing their agreement.

"Wait!" I suddenly yelled, causing more than one drink to be spilled. Oops…gotta work on my timing. Everyone looked up at me, just standing there with a broken glass in my outstretched hand.

"I have one more thing!" I ran through the doors in the back of the room to the back doors of the church. I saw Socko waving to me, standing beside something large draped in a blue cloth. Great, he made it! With no time for greetings I simply nodded and we pushed the large mystery structure into the main room. Most people stared, some people whispered to one another, and Sam, Freddie, Carly and Gibby just gawked.

When me and Socko finally got the thing to the front, I looked up at Freddie and Sam, a big goofy grin on my face.

"What is that?" Freddie asked.

'This…" I said, patting the structure on the side. "Is my wedding present to you guys." Sam and Freddie shared a nervous glance.

"Well, show us what's under there already!" Sam said, and a cheer of agreement rose up through the crowd.

I looked at Socko and mouthed 'On three'. He nodded to show that he understood. I counted out loud, taking a hold of the cloth covering this marvelous work of art.

"One….Two…Three!" There was a ubiquitous gasp as the cloth fell to the floor revealing a ten-foot marble statue of Sam and Freddie. The detail, I admit, was astounding. The stone Sam was sitting on a pile of various meats and holding a Pearpod. Freddie's marble double was likewise seated on a mountain of computers and clutching a piece of fried chicken. They were leaning forward in a kiss. It was no wonder the room was suddenly very, very quiet.

Sam and Freddie were the first to move closer, getting an all-around view of my work. Carly was next, followed by Gibby, then Ted, then many others. Finally everyone had a good look and cleared a space around the giant sculpture where only me, Sam, Freddie and Carly stood.

"Spencer…how long did it take you to make this?" Carly asked, still staring at the sculpture.

"Oh, I don't know. Like eleven years, I guess."

"And how come I've never seen it?" she pressed.

"Well, I kept it in my room and only worked on it when you were at school. That's why I never allowed you in my room." I explained. I looked over at Freddie. Uh-Oh. He had his thinking face on.

"Wait." Freddie said, his eyebrows furling. "That's when iCarly started."

"Yeah? So?"

"Sooo…." Freddie continued. I didn't like where this was going. "Me and Sam didn't even start dating until three years after iCarly started." Okay, I really didn't like where this was going.

"What's your point?" I said as calmly as I could. Which, in retrospect, wasn't very calm.

"Did you know that Sam and Freddie would end up together?" Carly said ,taking a step forward. I took a step back to match, shrinking away from the question.

"I, uh…don't understand the question?" Yeah. Real smooth, Spence.

"Hey wait…" Freddie said, his thinking face back on. "You were the one who told me about the fire escape."

"And you told me that's where Freddie was!" Carly added.

'Um…Coincidence?" I stuttered out. But Freddie was relentless. Curse his analytical brain!

"Aaaaand…. you were the one who talked me into asking Sam out in the first place!"

"To be fair, I didn't know you were talking about Sam…" This was getting bad.

"And, if I recall correctly, you came up with the plan to stop their first big fight." Ted said, stepping forward from the crowd. Great, even he was getting involved.

"And wasn't it you who convinced me I was making the right choice by staying in Seattle for college?" Freddie asked.

"Well, you see, those things can be explained…"

"And you helped me come up with how I proposed to Sam!" That last question hung in the air. All eyes were on us. I honestly didn't know how to respond to that one. I had to admit it to myself - I was caught. All that planning, all that time and effort - everything was being figured out. I decided it was best if I just came clean.

"Alright, alright! Yes! It was all me!" another audible gasp from the crowd. This was beginning to feel like a daytime drama. Not that I watch those or anything.

"But, why…" Carly began, but I cut her off.

"Look, I could tell how much Sam and Freddie really liked each other before they knew it themselves. I decided that they needed a little push in the right direction. Then that push turned into a shove, then the shove turned into this intricate plan I couldn't let fail. I mean, come on, you have to admit that this is my masterpiece."

"So you did all of this just for a stupid sculpture?" Carly said, pointing at the marble statue it took me years to create. I looked at her in confusion.

"What? A sculpture? No!" I moved over behind Freddie and Sam, wrapping my arms around their shoulders.

"THIS!" I exclaimed, pulling them into a tight hug. "Is my masterpiece!"