The teacher smiled as she looked at the poem Chowder had made. She had asked him to write a simple four-line poem about worms and flowers. But he had taken it a step farther and made a truly excellent free-verse poem. When she looked at the poem she smiled, this poem was a small bit above what a simple 8-year old could do.
Eat the people, that's all they are good for
Then step into the world of cheese, that's right, walk this way
Walk down the aisles of the movie theater of life and know that g-o-d spells god
The people ride snakes instead of cars, and the drive ins are crowded
The drive-in movie reminds me of snake pits I see in museums
Weird pink bunnies dance in front of my stone dead head
The blue elephants try desperately to tell me the future of mankind
What is the future I asked, they don't answer, they vanish
Now I guess I'm all alone inside an igloo in the center of the sun
When I die could you please burn my winter coat
There are secrets and fifty dollar bills inside that you shouldn't know
But finally my love and the meaning of life has come to me
My house has burnt down, it was made of wood coming from a tree
But perhaps it is the pink daffodils fault that I am messed up as I am
If the daffodils would leave me alone I'd know where I stand
The democracy of the pink cauliflowers on the sun is more than I can bear
I'm going bald, I'm losing sight, I can't see my own hair
The pink cauliflowers have long since withered and died
The daffodils turn black and leave the blindspot of my boiling eyes
My house's wood turned into bricks and started magically building itself again
At last my love has gotten tired, and has deserted me
Thank you for burning my secrets and my stolen money that I stole from zeusadite
My igloo has since fallen into a black hole and reappeared on Jupiter
I've found out that the future is dim and evil and doesn't exist
The blue elephants tell me that the bunnies have the future, but they won't give it up
The bunnies stop dancing and begin to kick my little head
I ride the snakes gentle coiling as I watch the movie
Yeah, feels nice, like an easy chair almost, mmmmmmmmm
Orgasmic pleasure as I ride the snakes gentle movements
As I ride the pleasure train the hours tick by slowly on their acid heart beats
The snakes are happy as I ride their scaly and cold bodies
I feel like I'm sitting on a lake of pure tranquility
Hmmmmm, feels so good to float on the snake pit
The bones in the snakes rub gently against my back and it feels like a massge
The snake pit has taken away my cares
The people leave their snakes cause the snakes won't leave me
The snakes know that I am an innocent man, and they will take care of me
The snakes take control of the world to keep their new baby man safe and warm
The teacher liked the poem that her student had made. Yet the poem met none of the criteria she set. It wasn't four lined, it didn't rhyme, and it wasn't about worms and flowers. Therefore, she had no choice but to give the poem an F.