Title: You Found Me
Rating: PG-13 for mild language and substance abuse
Summary: Jack is struggling to deal with life off the island when one day he takes things to far. Someone comes to the rescue, but will she make it in time? Takes place after the flash forwards in "Through the Looking Glass" and "Something Nice Back Home".
Disclaimer: Neither Lost, nor the song (You Found Me by The Fray) is mine, though I wish I'd had the brilliance to create them.
Author's Note: I know the chorus isn't right (it actually says lost and insecure), but I wrote it this way because that's what I originally thought the lyrics said. Also, I think it fits better with the story this way. And I know this is kind of dramatic and depressing, but I have felt the need to write this ever since I heard the song - it reminds me so much of Jack.

As always, reviews are nice. I hope you like it. ;)

Chapter 1: Getting Lost

I found God on the corner of First and Amistad.
Where the West was all but won.

Pacing up and down the crowded street, Jack frantically glanced at each person passing by, searching for someone. As he stared at the people, he thought about how far he had fallen. But that didn't matter now. All that was important was finding this one person.

Each face he looked into wasn't the one he was hoping to see, though. Disappointment coursed through him, as well as other feelings. Need, helplessness, the never-ending feeling of being completely and utterly alone.

Finally, on the street corner, Jack saw him. The only one who could help him now.

All alone, smoking his last cigarette.
I said, "Where you been?"
He said, "Ask anything."

Jack stood in front of this man that he had been looking for so desperately.

"Where in god's name have you been?" he demanded. "I've waited here for more than an hour. Did you get it?"

The other man calmly replied, "Can you pay for it?"

Jack quickly passed him a roll of bills as the man discreetly slipped him something in return.

"Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to get these?" he asked, but Jack was hardly paying attention anymore. His eyes had already begun to glaze over as he rubbed his thumb against the small bottle in his pocket.

"Hey! Are you listening?" the man practically shouted. "I said that's all I've got. So you'd better make good use of those, 'cause you ain't getting anymore for a long while. At least, not from me." He waited, watching Jack as the information sunk in.

Finally, Jack nodded slowly. "Yeah. Okay, well...thanks man," he said quietly. Then he walked away, his thoughts already turned back to what was in his pocket.

Where were you when everything was falling apart?
All my days were spent by the telephone that never rang.

Jack pushed open the door to his apartment; he never bothered to keep it locked anymore. There was nothing worth stealing anyway.

Falling down on his couch, he took the bottle out of his pocket and looked at it. He knew that all his problems would go away, as soon as he opened the top. But he didn't want to be like this anymore. He wanted to change.

So he put it down and reached for the phone that he always kept near him these days. He knew it was stupid, but he kept hoping that she would call him. When he was being rational, he understood that he had blown his chances with her long ago and she would never want to call him now. Would never want to see him again.

Though other times, he couldn't help but believe that she still loved him. And it was times like those that he would stare at the phone, just waiting for it to ring. Then it never did, and he felt like his heart was breaking all over again.

He knew it was his fault, he was the one who had driven her away. And today he was going to make things right. Picking up the phone, he tried to call her. But his hands were shaking so much that he could hardly press the keys.

Finally he managed to dial the right number. Holding the phone up to his ear, he knew exactly what to say. For the first time in a while, Jack was actually clearheaded and the words came easily to him.

Hearing her voice, he felt his heart lurch in his chest. He cared for her so much, that even listening to her made him want to hold her once more. He wanted to feel her near and tell her that everything would be alright.

"This is Kate Austen – " she began.

"Hey, Kate...I," he started to say. Then he froze.

" – Sorry, I'm not here to take your call right now. But please leave a message and I'll get back to you later."

Jack felt as though the world was falling out from under him. The one time he was ready to have a rational conversation with Kate, she didn't answer the phone. Not that she usually did anymore, because he was constantly calling her. But he needed to talk to her, to tell her how he felt. Before he lost himself again.

So he kept trying. He kept calling her, hoping she would pick up the phone. And after a long time – it could have been an hour or more, he didn't really care – he gave up. She wasn't going to answer. She had cut herself off from him. Maybe for good.

Feeling desperate and alone, Jack turned back to the only thing he knew.

Popping the top off the bottle, he shook its contents into his hand. The small green pills were the answer to his problems. He knew that they could make everything go away and make him forget. If only for a little while.

And suddenly he didn't care anymore. He just wanted it to be over.

And all I needed was a call that never came to the corner of First and Amistad.

Kate heard the phone ring as she walked in the door. Racing to place her grocery bags on the counter, she lunged for it, but was too late. Wanting to see if whoever it was left a message, she turned to the answering machine. Blinking in shock, she wondered briefly if it had broken. There was no way she could have that many messages.

But as she played them, one by one, and heard nothing but silence, she realized who they were from.

Jack.

He was always calling her these days and she had learned not to pick up when it was him. He only ever called her when he was drunk or high, which was most of the time now.

"But why did he call me so many times?" she wondered aloud to herself. Though Kate would never admit it, she worried about him. All the time. And she couldn't help the fear she was feeling.

Against her better judgment, she dialed his cell phone, frowning at how familiar his new number was to her.

She waited impatiently as it rang and rang, then she hung up, knowing that she would get no voicemail message – Jack had never bothered to make one.

Now she was starting to worry. Jack always answered his phone, no matter what he was doing, or what kind of state he was in. She knew that he carried it everywhere with him, in case she decided to call him on it.

And I am, Jack. So where are you? she thought frantically. Unable to control her actions, Kate called him again and again, hoping in vain that he would answer.

"Dammit Jack! Where are you?!" she shouted, banging her fist on the table. Now she knew that it really was time to panic.

Without making a conscious decision to do so, Kate ran out of the house and jumped in her car. She quickly pulled out of the driveway and headed in the direction of his apartment, driving at more than twice the speed limit. But she didn't care. All she needed was to make sure Jack was okay.

Lost in its cure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor surrounded, surrounded.

Running up the stairs to his apartment, Kate glanced out the window and saw that the sun was setting. For some reason, this filled her with a sense of urgency and she ran faster.

She pushed his door open, knowing that he didn't lock it, and didn't even flinch as it slammed against the wall. All she had eyes for was the sight in front of her.

Jack was sprawled on the ground. A bottle of pills lying beside him, empty.

"Oh god, Jack! No!" Kate found herself screaming as she ran to him. Grabbing for the tiny bottle, she spun it around to read the label. Oxycodone. Then she noticed that the name on the prescription wasn't his.

Jack, she thought. What have you done?

Why'd you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late you found me, you found me.

Lunging for the cell phone on the couch, Kate quickly dialed 9-1-1. While explaining what was wrong with Jack she tried her best to stay calm. She leaned over him to listen to his heart, as instructed by the person on the other end of the phone.

Laying her head against his chest, Kate listened for a pulse. And found one. It was weak, but at least Jack's heart was still beating. For now.

Kate knew he needed to get to a hospital, and she hoped the ambulance would arrive soon.

"Hold on Jack," she whispered, as tears streaked down her cheeks.

But in the end everyone ends up alone.
Losing her, the only one who's ever known
Who I am, who I'm not and who I wanna be.

Through the fog filling his brain, Jack was dimly aware of someone next to him. He wondered briefly if it was Kate. Knowing that was unlikely, he tried to push the idea away. But the image of her face just wouldn't leave his head. So he let her in. He saw her from a thousand different angles, always smiling at him. Colours swirled around in his head, distracting him and catching him in a kaleidoscope of images.

It was getting harder for his emotions to make sense anymore, but Jack knew he was feeling something that he hadn't experienced in a long time. He was happy.

I'm glad you came for me, Kate, he thought fuzzily. Then he let himself fall into the explosion of sensation going on in his head.

Through it all, he remembered flashes of his life and what it was like, back before everything had gone wrong. He and Kate talking on the couch, discussing his day at work, or what she had done while he'd been gone. He remembered holding her in his arms at night and knowing everything would be okay. And he'd believed it, until things had started to go wrong.

After a while he couldn't take it any longer. Being with Kate required him to be certain things that he wasn't. But though he didn't know how to handle it, Kate stayed by his side, helping him when he was sure he had lost himself for good.

Then he pushed her away. His own insecurities about their relationship were what ended the one thing he had left, the very thing he was trying to protect. And he only went downhill from there.

He wanted to be someone that Kate could turn to in a time of need and depend on. He wanted to "have her back," as she had promised him so long ago. But instead he had turned into his father. Pushing away the people he cared most about and falling deeper into the hole he had created for himself.

And now look where he was.

But he didn't want to think about those things now, and was having trouble focusing anyway. His train of thought became lost in the whirlwind of other images, swirling before his eyelids. So he let himself enjoy them, allowed himself get lost in the sensations, knowing they were probably the last things he would ever feel.

And in the end he was glad he got to be with Kate, if only in his mind. He was thankful to be with her the way he had before his life had gone so wrong.

Thank you for being here, Kate, he thought to himself. Then he was lost in his own head once more.

No way to know how long she will be next to me.

"Jack!" she shouted frantically as she heard him mumble slightly. Kate waited, not daring to make a sound and hoping that he would wake up. But all she felt was his already faint heartbeat slow even more. "Hold on, they're gonna be here soon. Just stay with me." She clutched his hand fiercely, squeezing it hard enough that she hoped he could feel it. She hoped that somewhere, in whatever place he was in now, he could feel her with him.

Lost in its cure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor surrounded, surrounded.

Looking down at Jack, Kate thought of all the things she wished she had said to him. All the times she wanted to tell him the way she felt. And now, seeing him lying there, she wished she'd had the courage. If only she'd cherished the time she used to have with Jack, then maybe he wouldn't be here like this. She looked at his empty bottle of pills and wondered how things had gotten so bad for him.

But then Kate realized that if Jack...she couldn't bear to think the word died, if he disappeared from her life, things would be pretty bad for her too. Kate had used to think this was what she wanted – Jack out of her life for good – but now she knew better.

"Just stay with me Jack. You're going to make it and when you do, I'll be right here with you." Kate only hoped that it wasn't too late.

Why'd you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late, you found me, you found me.

She jumped when she heard someone banging on the door. Glancing up, she saw a team of paramedics run into the room. Kate moved out of their way as they leant over Jack, but she made sure to keep holding his hand. She knew it was stupid, but she thought that if he could feel her, Jack might fight harder.

Time passed slowly as Jack was injected with needles and other steps were taken to try and flush the medication out of his system. Then she watched helplessly as he was loaded onto a stretcher, out the door and into the elevator. Kate squeezed in before the doors closed, despite the looks from the medical team. On the ride down she begged them to let her stay with Jack, trying to explain her need to be with him. Before she could break into tears at the thought of being separated from Jack when he needed her most, the paramedics reluctantly agreed to let her ride in the ambulance with them.

Rushing through the apartment lobby, Kate hardly noticed the people staring. She didn't hear the whispers of conversation that started when she and the medics exited the elevator. All she was focused on was Jack.

The early morning, the city breaks.
And I've been calling for years and years and years and years
And you never left me no messages.

Pushing open the front doors so the stretcher could fit through, Kate blinked in surprise. Looking past the buildings crowding the street, she could see how dark the sky had gotten. Though it was pitch black up in the atmosphere the lights from L.A. kept the stars hidden. She hadn't seen more than a few stars since the Island and for some strange reason Kate missed those twinkling specks in the sky.

But soon the sun would begin to rise once more and people would go about with their daily lives. She wondered how it was possible for the world to keep turning when Jack was about to disappear forever. Yet life still managed to go on.

She watched Jack get loaded into the ambulance, then hopped in before anyone could find a reason to protest. She took Jack's hand again and stared out the small window, thinking about what she would be doing on a regular day.

But as she glanced back down at Jack, she realized today wasn't a regular day. And if he didn't recover from this, she would never have a regular day again. A strong wave of sadness washed over her and the tears began to fall again, even though her every move was being watched by the paramedic in the back with her.

"Jack, don't leave me, please," she begged. "I can't live without you, and I can't bear the thought of it."

As the medic hooked Jack up to IV lines and screens to monitor his heart rate, Kate kept pleading with him.

"I know you're in there Jack. Don't leave me now." Frustrated when he showed no signs of hearing her, Kate began to shout. "Come on, Jack! Where are you? Come back to me!"

You never sent me no letters.
You got some kind of nerve taking all I want.

She almost didn't notice when his hand tightened around hers. But when Jack slowly opened his eyes, Kate gasped in surprise.

"Jack," she managed to choke out through her tears. "Thank god you're okay."

He looked at her sadly, pain filling his eyes as her voice broke. He wanted so badly to hold her and tell her everything would be okay, but he couldn't remember how to use his arms. So instead, he focused all his remaining energy on saying the words he needed to.

Lost in its cure you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor.
Where were you? Where were you?

"I'm sorry," he whispered. And he was, for everything. It was all his fault, because he couldn't handle life and didn't know how to deal with it. He needed Kate to understand.

So, putting all his feelings into those two words, he quietly said them again.

"I'm sorry." Then Jack closed his eyes once more. And all Kate could hear was the beep beep beep of the heart-rate monitor.

Lost in its cure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor surrounded, surrounded.

But as she watched, the beeps became less and less frequent, and Kate began to panic.

"How close are we to the hospital?" she demanded, turning to the paramedic.

"A few minutes at least," the man replied as he looked at Jack's monitor. "But I don't know if we're going to make it in time."

Kate felt her heart sink. "Isn't there anything you can do?" she shouted. "Please, do something!"

"I'm trying," the medic replied calmly, "but it may be out of my hands." The man turned to Jack and began adjusting all the wires attached to him.

Why'd you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late, you found me, you found me.

Kate pulled Jack close and wept, her tears falling on his blank face. Though it looked like he was just sleeping, she knew better. He was dying – unless she could do something about it. Holding him in her arms, she listened as Jack's heart slowed down.

She kissed him on the forehead and whispered the words she had been afraid to say for so long.

"I love you."

Then Kate prayed that the ambulance would make it to the hospital in time.

Why'd you have to wait to find me, to find me?