No new chapter. Yeah, yeah, I know. I've gotta stop doing this to you guys. But listen; this is really important.
I'm scared. Ever since I stopped writing, my life's been going to crap, to put it bluntly. My grades are slipping, I'm losing all my friends, I hurt myself on a daily basis, and I cry myself to sleep almost every night. The other night, as I was cutting my wrists, I was going for stitches. I actually WANTED stitches in my wrist.
I don't know how many of you read that one-shot about Edward killing himself that I had up here not too long ago, but it was a cry for help. I want help. I posted that the night I tried to kill myself. Yeah, I know, I said it was about a suicide attempt of my ex.
I lied.
The other night I was laying in bed, and I had an epiphany. When I gave up on writing, I was basically throwing myself to the wolves. Writing, as it turns out, was my way of relieving stress. Now that I don't have that, I'm nothing but stress.
I want to fix that. Please, guys, don't read this and think, "God. How pathetic can Laughin'Place get? She's such an attention whore!" because that's not what I'm trying to say. This is not a scream for attention, it's a cry for help. Don't tell me I only want attention, or that I'm just being an emotional fifteen-year-old, or that I'm possessed or something. Trust me, I've heard it all, and it's those types of comments that have made me hide my depression from everyone.
I don't think the anti-depressants I'm on are working... and that scares me. Please, guys, help me get back to writing. Help me through this. I want my stress-reliever back. I need it. Any kind words or help getting back on track with my stories that you guys can give would really make a difference in my life right now. You guys are seriously the last chance I'm giving myself.
Love, Laughin'Place