Don't Lie in Love
Formerly: What Happened When I Lied

Authoress: iTomo
Chapter: Six – On Walls and Whispers
Published: February 14, 2014

Ruka.

Hey. That could work.

It wasn't impossible.

•

Mikan's POV

Legitimate reasons why asking Ruka Nogi to the Outing was a solid idea: (1) We were good friends; (2) He was fun to talk to and easy to get along with; (3) He was most comfortable with either Hotaru or me, and seeing that his best friend was going to ask Hotaru, I was a logical choice; (4) Going together will ensure that neither will be dateless nor cursed.

Illegitimate reasons why asking Ruka Nogi to the Outing was a solid idea: (1) I would not have to be alone; (2) He would not be Natsume Hyuuga.

Seemed pretty solid, I decided, no matter how you looked at it. I spent the whole of Molecular Biology class debating whether or not I should do it—it wasn't like there was some law that stated that girls couldn't ask guys out. And besides, dates weren't required to be significant others. Well, he was significant. Just not a significant other.

And I was not taking advantage of Ruka's kindness, or anything. We were just going as . . . significant friends.

My plan was to buy a bag of performance-enhancing carrots and just "happen" to visit the horses at the Academy Barnyard when Ruka made his rounds after school. He wasn't the designated caretaker, but I noticed that he took it upon himself to make sure that the animals on school property were rested and fed properly. By nature, he was a caring person, but combined with his animal pheromone Alice . . . keeping Ruka Nogi away from animals simply wasn't done.

Planning my proposal was a good way to keep me distracted from Natsume's presence. I snuck a glance at him, then forced my gaze to Ruka, who was sitting to his right.

•

Natsume's POV

A side-effect of loving someone is being hyperaware of her very existence and actions. Mikan was also known to not be very subtle, so when I felt her obviously peek in my general direction, I stealthily looked over. I didn't like how she was avoiding me lately.

And where was she looki—

"Miss Sakura," Jinno-sensei reprimanded from the front of the classroom. "If you could grace us with your attention."

"Ah!" She jumped, slightly. "Sorry, Jinjin."

"Your grade on the last assessment was quite lacking," he continued. "Whatever it is that is distracting you—put it out of your head until after class."

She flushed but laughed sheepishly.

Ruka, I thought. She's in love with Ruka.

"Natsume," my best friend whispered. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I whispered back and forced myself to relax.

•

Mikan's POV

How do boys do this proposal thing? Was I supposed to get flowers or something? I felt especially silly lugging around a sack of carrots from Central Town to the trolley, then back to the campus, but it wasn't until I was in front of the great doors of the horse shed that I truly began to freak out.

What am I doing?

Okay, okay. I was just here to casually mention that I did not have a date for the Outing. Nothing else. I was just taking steps towards moving on with my life. That's the thing—life moves on even in the face of our private suffering, and I was determined to not be left behind. Loving Natsume was one thing, but if he was interested in someone else, and that someone else was my dear Hotaru, who I also love very much—then of course, I must take a separate route.

I sighed and took a seat next to the doors, against the wall. What was the rush? Ruka wasn't even here yet. Besides, having to keep up my guard was hard enough without second-guessing my decisions. There was a soft pain settling in my heart, but I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths, hoping to alleviate some of the pressure in my chest.

When did I first meet him?

We were ten, and I was still wearing panties with polka dots. And even back then, when he was just shy of five feet, his presence always felt strong, always giving me some kind of comfort. A smile tugged on my lips as I remembered how he always seemed to be near, even though it hurt to think about being twelve. I don't regret falling in love with him—falling out of love was the problem.

No, no. I'm moving on. Natsume Hyuuga is not my only treasure. I just have to focus on the other wonderful things in my life. Like having Hotaru there for me, even though I'm not sure where she stands with Natsume now. And having Ruka—the neutral party. While I focused on all this, I heard footsteps. My eyes shot open and—

"Ruka?" I blurted instinctively.

"No, idiot," Natsume narrowed his eyes at me, walking closer to where I was sitting. "Which part of me even looks like him?"

Oh my Howalon. Just the person I want to see when I'm trying to move on.

"The cute part," I teased. What am I saying?

"Are you waiting for him?" he asked, stopping a foot away from me, hands in his pockets. Guarded. Like always.

I wanted to break his walls, I realized, not build one against him.

"Nah, I just like hanging around the horses," I heard myself say. When Natsume was around, I couldn't help but ramble. "Of course I'm waiting for him."

He turned to look at the sky, as if he hadn't heard me.

"Natsume?"

"I was looking for him too," he said. "But if you see him first, tell him I need his Molecular Bio notes."

"Ah, were you not paying attention during class?"

"I was," he answered, flatly. "Well, I'm leaving now."

"Okay," I swallowed. "Bye."

Would you be disappointed in me if I told you that I started crying after he left? I just hate the way backs look when they're walking from you. But I don't even have the right to ask him to stay anymore.

•

Hotaru's POV

Where was Mikan? She disappeared almost immediately class ended—which was unusual. Very unusual, considering the fact I am generally forced to spend 70% of my baka bullets to keep her at arm's distance. Was she okay? I decided to look for her by the Northern Forest, where she tended to go when she was anxious. At least the safer part of the forest.

I heard a rustling of leaves up in a tree.

"Mikan?" I peered up.

"Damn," a distinctly-not-Mikan voice muttered. "What's with people mistaking me for others today?"

Ah. Hyuuga.

"Do you know where Mikan is?" I asked, keeping my distance.

"Yeah," his voice floated down from the tree. "But don't bother looking for her. She's waiting for Ruka."

"Oh."

"Don't pity me."

"I'm not." And I wasn't. Or at least I don't think I was. "Is she okay?"

"Imai," he mumbled. "Most people would ask, 'Are you okay?' in situations like this."

"But you are okay," I said as I turned to leave.

Another rustle. And then: "Yeah."

From the Desk of iTomo

Dear lovely readers,

Thanks for reading! I know it's been too long . . . It'd be wonderful if you could give me some feedback on pacing and storytelling. :) Even though I don't deserve to ask you guys to stay . . . (just like Mikan haha.)

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