A/N: Long time since I've done anything, yeah? Well, after torturing myself through math exams, and chilling out for a couple of hours with ShitenMyu, I was struck by a sudden urge to write something. I know, sue my muse or something. I always loved the match between Shiraishi and Fuji, and although I love them both, it's so sad that Fuji lost. Most of all, it never ceased to amaze me how seemingly disappointed Fuji was after the match, then in the next episode... He's all good. Bothered me to no end. . Besides, there are basically NO stories that involve this happening out there?! Well, I love my angst, and I love my TezuFuji. This was supposed to be just friendship, then it just... Involved some slash, somehow, though it turned out very, and I underline, VERY awkward. I would've frowned if I read it. Oh well.

Oh, by the way, I think I might present Shiraishi in quite a bad way here. Don't think more of it, I love him, the story just flows better that way!

Also, as a reviewer reminded me of, this is slightly AU. Some details, I forgot, just simply because it's been so long since I read these parts. I know they didn't stay at some dorms during that tournament, and I know that they celebrated at some restaurant. HOWEVER. I originally forgot the part about dorms, and when reminded of it, I didn't want to change it. To me, it makes sense. My team stays at hotels, dorms, whatever, when we're away for tournaments, no matter how close. This improves focus. Before the National tournament, I think it would be useful for Seigaku to do this. And for the food part, I always meant for it to be take-away or whatever instead of at the restaurant. Again, flows better with the story. Hell, when making it AU, take it out BIG TIME.

In case I did not make this clear enough, THIS FIC IS SET IN A SLIGHT AU AFTER THE MATCH AGAINST SHITENHOUJI. Thank you.

Warnings: Spoilers, angst, slight yaoi (maleXmale), slight OOCness, non-beta'ed text... Think that's about it.

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, or any part of the franchise. If I did, TezuFuji would be more than just hinted, and TezuRyo would be an illegal thought.


Imperfect

"Fuji."

Fuji flinched slightly from his position at the bench as he heard the arrival of another person. He shivered slightly from the late night air brushing at his bare arms, but ignored it as he stared into his captain's bespectacled eyes.

"Tezuka." His smile was as present as ever, but something was off in his usually so merry voice. His eyes missed some of their usual spark as well, and the way he had distanced himself from the rest of the Regulars, instead sitting outside in the cold night wearing nothing but sweatpants and a t-shirt, had alarmed Tezuka. This was not like Fuji at all.

"Why are you out here?" the taller boy asked. Fuji smiled slightly and shrugged, looking away from Tezuka and out towards the tennis courts..

"I don't know," he replied. "Maybe it was the serene scenery of the evening that drew me out here. I wish I had my camera."

"You do," Tezuka said, frowning. "It's in your bag."

"Oh," Fuji sighed, a tint of resignation evident in his voice. "I forgot."

They were silent for a while, Fuji sitting as motionless as ever on the far edge of the bench, Tezuka standing next him, staring down at the other boy with a frown.

"Are you just going to stand there, Tezuka?" Fuji finally said, breaking eye contact with the bush he had previously been staring at. "It's much more comfortable to sit on the bench, you know."

"Hn."

Nevertheless, Tezuka sat down next to the prodigy, before both resumed their silence.

Tezuka noted how Fuji's smile eventually faltered, whether it was because he forgot to maintain it, or because he thought the captain was not watching. The latter frowned before his eyes trailed down to his hands. They were tightly curled into fists, enough to draw blood. As he shifted slightly, he sighed as he realized they already had. He was shaking again, and Tezuka was not surprised; clad in a thick hoodie, he was freezing himself.

"Come back inside, Fuji. It's cold out here." He said after a while. Anyone else would have a slightly worried tone when saying this. Tezuka was void of all emotions.

"No."

Sighing at the prodigy's stubbornness, Tezuka tried again. "Please, Fuji. Come in."

"No."

"I command you to come back inside."

"Outside the courts, you don't have the power to command me to do anything."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Tezuka resisted the urge to sigh again. Fuji could be so damn annoying sometimes. He did not understand why the small boy was so adamant about staying outside. The only thing he would accomplish would be to get a cold. That would not do anyone any good. Besides, something was clearly bothering the usually smiling boy. As much as Tezuka hated to admit it out loud, he really cared for Fuji. He was one of his best friends, perhaps the best friend. He hated seeing him suffer like this, especially when he did not know why or what he could do to help.

"Then I ask you as your friend, Fuji," he said seriously, staring intently at said boy. "Please. It's for your own good."

Fuji did not reply at first, only shifted his gaze to his fist in his lap. Then, with a small, defeated sigh of his own, he shook his head. "No."

"Why not?" Tezuka countered fiercely before he even registered it himself. Surprised at his own straightforwardness, the bespectacled boy opened his mouth to say something before he was cut of by Fuji.

"Because I don't want to." he said sadly, although with a slight smile. Tezuka frowned.

"Why not?" he asked, confused. "We're celebrating, Fuji. We won the semi-finals."

"Not thanks to me, at least."

Realization dawned upon Tezuka. Of course. Fuji was sad because he lost his first official singles match today. He felt as if he had betrayed his team. Granted that he played against Shiraishi Kuranosuke, captain of Shitenhouji, famous for his "Bible Tennis", but Fuji was never one to judge people based by rank or reputation. To him, tennis players were tennis players, nothing more, nothing less.

Tezuka remember with a stab of pain how Fuji had regained five straight games, only to proceed to a tie break. He remembered how Fuji had kept going, even though Shiraishi had mocked him, broken all of his counters, and all but humiliated him. He remembered how Fuji had the match point, but in the end lost due to a bitter 'out'. He remembered how Fuji had defeatedly staggered back to the bench, so tired that he could barely stand. But most of all, he remembered how he had refused to look at the broken prodigy after he had returned to the regulars.

None of them had ever seen Fuji like that before. Not even Yuuta and Eiji. Fuji had, no matter how things went, always kept his smile present, encouraging others to do their best, and be happy with what they did. He did not care when he lost a doubles match. He and his partners always did what they could, but were in the end overwhelmed. But he never got as disappointed as he did today.

Up to the point where Shiraishi was in the lead 5-0, Tezuka thought this just simply was not entertaining enough for Fuji. He knew he could do better, so he assumed this was one of his moments where he just simply would not bother trying. Then Fuji stood up again, with more determination than Tezuka had ever seen. The matches against Mizuki, Kirihara, Hirakoba, Echizen, or even himself were no where near as intense as the one he had played today. The one where he had given it all, but still lost.

Tezuka was not sure of exactly which aspect of his loss it was that hurt Fuji the most. Maybe it was the unity of it all. But no matter what it was, he knew that the one Fuji was most angry at, was himself. In his eyes, he had not only failed his team, but also his friends and himself. Tezuka knew that no matter how many times he told Fuji that they won in the end and that is all that matters, Fuji had to solve this problem on his own. But Tezuka did not like how he coped.

"It was not your fault that you lost," he said, eventually. "Everyone does it once in a while. It's only human."

Fuji did not answer.

"Shiraishi is a strong opponent. Anyone would have struggled against him," Tezuka continued, mentally wondering where he wanted to go with all of this. "No one can say that you didn't fight him evenly. The match could have ended in either favor."

"But it didn't," Fuji said bitterly. "It didn't, and you know it. Don't try to pity me, Tezuka. I know I might not deserve anything else from you, but please, don't. I know I screwed up, and I'm sorry, but there's nothing I'd rather do than go back in time to change all this. I really wanted to win, I won't lie to you, but I were unable to. Just simply unable to win. I've never lost a singles match before, Tezuka..."

"Fuji - "

"I know we won in the end, but thanks to me, we might as well have lost."

"Fuji - "

"Don't even go there. Both you and Kawamura gave it all for your matches, and you won. Momo and Kaidoh didn't even have to push it that far."

"Fuji!"

Before Tezuka realized what he had done, he grabbed Fuji's shoulders and pinned him to the wall behind them. He vaguely registered how cold the other was from his long stay out. As he stared into the broken, sky blue eyes, he felt something inside him break. Fuji was so vulnerable, so fragile. So easy to break. And Shiraishi had managed to do that perfectly.

"Listen, Fuji," he said gently. "Forget what Shiraishi did and said today. You are a great tennis player. You can do anything you want on court, you own no limits. I am sure that if you had met a second time, you would have won. You are one of our most valuable players. And my most valuable friend." he added under his breath, but he was sure Fuji still heard it.

"What good is my imperfect play to the team if all I do is dragging it down?" Fuji whispered sadly. "I'm nothing valuable then. Not to anyone."

"Your tennis is not imperfect," Tezuka replied softly. "It is perfect."

"No," Fuji said, shaking his head sadly. "Anything that can be broken is imperfect."

"Anything that can be broken is real," Tezuka whispered. Fuji stared back at him, tears forming in his beautiful eyes.

"Go on, just cry." Tezuka said with a slight smile as he watched the prodigy. He barely caught a glimpse of crystalline drops as Fuji buried his face in his chest, sobbing lightly. A bit surprise at the turn of events, Tezuka smiled again, and wrapped his arms protectively around the smaller boy. He breathed in the sweet scent of Fuji's hair and started rubbing soothing circles on his back. He noticed how the smaller boy shivered slightly, though if it was from the cold, his touch or his tears, Tezuka did not know.

"It's okay," he whispered.

"I love you," came the muffled, half-suffocated reply from Fuji. Hearing those words, Tezuka tightened his grip if only the slightest.

"I love you too."


"Tezuka! I see you found him," Oishi greeted Tezuka as he entered the dorms, carrying a sleeping Fuji bridal style.

"Hn." was Tezuka's usual reply.

"What was - " Oishi started, seeing trails of tears staining Fuji's cheeks.

"He was upset about today's match," Tezuka said simply, as emotionless as ever.

"Oh," Oishi frowned. "Should've known. He did take it pretty bad. But I thought he was over it?"

"Apparently not," was Tezuka's reply as he proceeded to the room he and Oishi shared, the vice-captain trailing shortly behind him.

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"What did you say to him?" Oishi asked. Tezuka frowned slightly.

"I told him to get a hold of himself," he replied, eventually. "That no one is perfect, and everyone loses matches sometimes."

"As expected from Tezuka," Oishi smiled and watched as Tezuka carefully laid the still-sleeping form of Fuji down on one of the two small beds in the room.

"He's probably going to catch a cold tomorrow..." Tezuka mumbled to himself and placed a hand on the sleeping boy's forehead.

"Did you say something, Tezuka?"

"I'm sorry Oishi, but would you mind sleeping with Kikumaru tonight?" Tezuka asked seriously, turning towards his vice-captain. Oishi shook his head lightly.

"Of course," he said with a small smile, before exiting the room. "Good night, Tezuka."

"Good night, Oishi."


Uhm, yeah, what do you think? xP I added a little hidden meaning there, but it was due to overload in my brain; have analysed waaay to many texts in litterature lately. When Fuji and Tezuka have that "broken/imperfect" discussion, Fuji means no one would want him because he is not perfect; he is broken and not good enoough. Tezuka means it only makes him real, and even more loveable. Makes sense? No? Didn't think so.

By the way, I'm drugged on EijiMyu right now, so sorry for the quarky end. (EijiMyu, yes you read that correct. Too many Eiji/Cap to Bin-songs will do that to you.)

If you've endured my rabbling this far, I'm sure you can handle spending 15 seconds of your life reviewing as well! :D Thanks for reading, anyways!