The Last Sheet

The sun was just starting to set. The sky hadn't started to turn vibrant shades of red and orange, but was instead a dull blue color. Like a sapphire that had just been unearthed but not honed. There were a few wisps of clouds building in the west, and the wind whipped through the trees, reminding the travelers of the storm that was building. Yuffie said something about it, but no one listened to her. At least not until she threw something heavy at them. Tifa tried to calm her down, but it was like asking a mountain to bow.

Everyone chuckled, not because they wanted to, but because they couldn't help themselves. Even Vincent and Cloud cracked a shattered smile. Everyone looked better when they smiled, but sometimes it just seemed like a broken façade. The days felt like they were getting longer and harder. Like every step was a lead weight being placed on their soul. They kept going because it was the only thing they knew, the only thing they understood. Sometimes their quest became confusing, knotted… sad. They lost friends, memories, and even…

Aerith stopped the thought before it took root. It had been so long since she thought about him. Long enough that she considered it history. Long enough that days went by before ghosts of memories were stirred up in her mind. But looking at Cloud… Aerith blushed as his Mako-blue eyes touched hers. She turned away, pretending to be interested in the setting sun.

She never saw his tanned skin and blonde hair. She never saw the round features of a boy coming into manhood.

No, she saw pale skin and dark hair. An angular body, skilled in the ways of a Soldier, old enough to be her love. She saw rough hands that were familiar to a sword as large as his own body. Hands that knew how to handle materia. Fingers that knew her only ticklish spot. Aerith frowned and she took a step away from her companions.

It was growing inside her. An empty ache that she couldn't fill. A black spot that blossomed over her heart, only pretending to be a flower when she knew it was a poisonous weed. She blocked the memories, spoke lovely, innocent words, but it wouldn't go away. Light couldn't even reach its depths. It kept growing and growing until the emptiness became a void and nothing, not even her new friends, would fill it.

Aerith slipped her hands into the pockets on her dress and she felt the crinkle of paper. Her last sheet. She'd been saving it to write her last letter to him. Saving it to write beautiful words or memories of their time together. But she had never used it, and so it stayed close to her, protected. Cherished more than gil. The edges grew yellowed with age and handling. But it was loved. Tonight would be a good night to use it. She didn't know why, but it was… perhaps some part of her knew tonight was the anniversary of his… Aerith couldn't think the word, and she whispered: "disappearance" instead.

She walked away from her friends and wandered into the woods their jovial laughter fading. There was a stream near-by, and she knew bright blue flowers that grew next to it. The same color as his eyes. Mako-blue. They stared up at her winking in the wind, water sloshing gently around their leaves. Aerith always felt better next to water, it reminded her of the world she used to be too scared to see. The world he tried to show her so many times.

Aerith pulled out her last sheet and placed it on the ground. The paper looked strange against such natural surroundings. Foreign and unique. It was almost a shame to change the pale innocence of the paper, bit she wanted to use it. Needed to. Slowly, carefully, she wrote:

I know today is important for you, but I do not know why. I know that I should remember this day, cherish this day, but the reason eludes me. Perhaps today is the day we met, perhaps today in the day you disappeared. I do not know. I only know that I want these words to find you. I want you to know that it is time for me to seek you again. To find your eyes I miss so much. Do not ask me how I know, I just do. It will not be much longer.

Aerith paused over the pristine sheet, looking at her elegant script, and sighing.

I miss you.

"Aerith?"

She jerked away from her paper and stared into a pair of beautiful eyes. There, cast in the shadows of the fading light, she almost believed him to be a ghost. Her breath caught in her chest and she took a step back, swallowing the fear that had risen in her throat. "I… I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wander off, I just wanted to write a letter."

"Oh?" That was all he said. There was no actual question, no inquiry as to what she wrote. Just a surprised statement. Silence enfolded them for another moment before Cloud managed another few words. "Did you want to mail it when we are in the next town?"

Aerith tried not to look sad as she smiled at him. "No, but thank you. Its destination is hard to find… I think I will let fate do it for me." She stared at those last three words, feeling her heart shudder under their weight. This was her last sheet, and she had been saving it for him. Aerith folded the sheet into a neat, little square before tossing it into the stream. She watched it bob up and down in the water before drifting away with the current. "Fate will find where that needs to go."

"Mm." Cloud watched the paper, but he didn't say anything else. They watched the stream for a few more moments before Aerith brushed off her skirt and started back to their camp. Her last sheet had been used, and there was no longer a heavy burden holding onto her soul. The sheet would find its way to him, she knew that.

)O(

I wanted to write this for sometime. I don't know why. I think because of the fact I essentially bawled through the entire ending of Crisis Core and yelled at my PSP because it didn't end the way I wanted it to. So here it is, what ever it may be. Let me know what you think!

With Love Always: Xaph!