Chapter 19

Not mine… just saying.

It had been a week since Castiel had revealed who the voice was and Bella was still flipping out about it.

The good thing about it was that she found a little comfort in knowing that Lucifer also wanted Sam and that Sam was not going to give in so that motivated her to keep on fighting with the brothers.

She smiled as she thought about the day Castiel came and told her about Lucifer. She was positive he had been mad when he said Lucifer wanted her as a partner and the only reason he would be mad was because he was not happy with the idea of her with someone else. That least that was what she hoped.

"What are you smiling about?" Alice asked her as she came in to the kitchen.

Bella was currently making dinner for all the humans and was actually having fun doing it.

"Nothing, just thinking about stuff." Bella said getting about to the food.

"Yeah I'm sure." Alice said smiling at her.

"How is Jasper?" Bella asked as she got plates out for the food.

"He is still with the family."Alice said. The way she said it made Bella turn to look at.

"Whats wrong?" Bella asked going to Alice to comfort her.

"Rose is being hard as always. They are trying to convince her but she won't have it." Alice said, "So Carlisle asked Jasper to stay until she changes her mind. But that could be a while."

"Why is she being hard to began with?" Bella asked. She had always known that Roselie was the most hard head of the family given how Roselie had felt about Bella when she was with Edward but she had not thought that Roselie would always be like this about everything. Or maybe it was just when Bella come up in anything.

"Edward would know if he was over there but he is over here with us." Alice said, "It doesn't matter yet. We still have time." She paused, "Lets get the boys there food so they can stop whining." Alice said as she started helping Bella with the food.

As she said this Dean walked in, "Hey I'm starving people. I would love to have my food any tme now."

"Go sit down. We are going." Bella said smiling.

It was much later that day that Bella sat outside in the porch looking up at the stars like Castiel had all those months ago when he first told her about him being an angel.

She was hoping that the witch from Mexico was right and all Castiel needed was time. Bella realized that she had slowly started falling for the angel but she realized she did not know him at all. Bella was wondering if she should make a move but then thought it would not matter if Castiel didn't know or understand what it was she was doing.

It was like this that Edward found her an hour later.

"A penny for your thoughts." Edward said.

Bella jumped a little as soon as he had said that. Edward was still quiet she had forgotten about that. She turned to look at him and stated wondering how long had he been there.

"Hey, you scared me." Bella said truthfully.

"Sorry I didn't mean to startle you." He said walking closer to her.

It was silent for a moment before she turned back to looking at the stars. She figured if he wanted to talk he would get to it. She had wondered where he was all that time when everyone else was at the house and he wasn't there but it wasn't her place to question him anymore.

"So you're a super weapon." Edward said quietly. Bella turned to look at him. He looked exactly the same. And Bella knew that if in a hundred years she saw him again, he would look exactly the same as he did right now and it kind of unnerved her now. But then that's what was going to happen to Castiel in his human host. Both boys would live forever the way the are right now. Bella didn't know how to feel about it so she answered Edward.

"Yeah, I guess I am." Bella said quietly as she turned back to the stars.

"So… how have you been?" Edward asked trying to start conversation.

"What is it that you want?" Bella said suddenly. It wasn't that she was mad or something. She jut didn't know why he was here now. He had had over 6 months to come back when she was a Forks and plenty of time when she was with the brothers and he choose now to return. The question was why.

"What do you mean?" Edward asked.

"I mean why come back now. You made it perfectly clear you don't love or want me any more and I got over it. But I don't need you to rub it in my face that you no longer love me. That's just over the top." She said. She didn't scream it or yell it. She didn't even turn to look at him. She whispered it while she looked at the stars, the one thing that was going to be there all the time for her.

"Bella…. Its not that I no longer love you…" He paused, "Will you look at me please." She turned around and looked at the boy she had once loved, "I still love you." He said looking at her.

"You think I simple 'I love you' will change everything?" Bella said.

"No, I know I can't ever ix any of it but I can try. I know you have feelings for the angel and I'm not going to stop you. I know its my fault for leaving… Its very hard not being able to read your mind…." Edward trailed off.

"I thought you liked that you couldn't read my mind." Bella said.

"Most of the times I do but right now I don't know what you are thinking."

"Edward…." Bella started. She knew what she had to do. She couldn't be with Edward any more and he needed to know that. The love for Edward that she had back then was gone and it was not going to come back. It was time for him to move on just like she had.

"I have changed in the last few months. I'm not the same person you met all those months ago. God…" she trailed off. "Edward, I don't love you anymore." She paused. She could see it in his eyes, they was breaking. He was breaking.

"I moved on. You forced me to when you left all those months ago. And I can't go back." Bella finished. "I have to stay in the present. I can't look back or forward because while I can't change the past, it hurts to think about it and the future frightens me more than it should."

She didn't say anything after that and Edward didn't either. It was a while later that Edward finally said, "I still love you. I will wait for you until the the day you die or the day you no longer exist I just want you to know that." He said and walked way from Bella.

Bella just stood there for a few more minutes before she too left to go back to her room. She knew she had done the right thing but that didn't mean it had not hurt. It hurt even more knowing that every word she had said was true. She couldn't look back and thinking about the what ifs did her no good. Bella was certain that the love she once felt for Edward would not return and it would have been worng of her to tell Edward it would.

Bella went to her room quietly making sure she didn't wake up anyone. She slipped in to her room and changed quickly to her night clothes and fell asleep not knowing that the whole conversation was heard by an angel who now understood what Bella had that was so bad for him.

Edward left the next day to go with his family he had not seen in a while. Bella only found out because Alice told them over breakfast.

"I think he went to try to convince Rose to come over here." Alice said after Dean asked her why he left. Bella noticed they weren't as attached to Edward as they were to Alice. It might have to do with the fact that Edward had never been here as much as Alice. And Alice just seem to get along with everyone.

"So what are we going to do?" Bella asked looking around the breakfast table

"What do you mean?" asked Dean as he looked up from his breakfast.

"Well what do you usually do now?" Bella asked impatiently. She had gotten as good as she was going to get with Alice and she was so ready to try some of the stuff for real.

"Well there is nothing we can do but wait." Bobby said from his wheelchair looking at Bella.

"What about hunting something?" Bella said looking around the table and stopping at remembered that Sam had wanted to hunt last time they had got out.

"I don't know Bella…" said Dean looking at Bobby for support.

"Bella you're not ready yet." Bobby said looking at Bella.

"Which is why I should go out and hunt something.!" Bella said looking around the table, "Come on guys I can't just stay here forever."

Bobby was about to say something when he was interrupted by another.

"She needs to learn how to control her power." Said a voice from the living room.

Everyone turned to see Castiel walking in.

"She needs to go hunting." Castiel said looking at Bobby.

"Cas… no offense Bella, but we don't think she is ready." Dean said as he looked at Bella and then Castiel.

"Which is why she needs to go hunting and learn about her powers." Castiel said.

"But she knows nothing about them." Bobby said.

"She has to learn about them the same way anyone does. By experimenting with them." Sam said for the first time.

"And how did that go with you, Sam." Dean said darkly.

No one said anything for a few seconds.

Bella was looking around wondering what that was about.

"Bella's powers are natural. They don't come from anything except herself." Sam finally said.

"And how are we suppose to help her? Its not like we have any powers to help her with. Other than Alice but how is that suppose to help?" Dean said looking at Castiel.

"Bella is right she needs to go hunting." Sam said.

"Isn't that what I said." Bella said looking around the table, "I cant be stuck here anymore. I need to learn hands on like I did with Alice."

"You aren't ready Bella." Bobby said looking angry for the first time.

"And she never will be if you don't let her." Alice said looking at Bobby. Everyone turned to look at Alice. "You're forgetting I already saw what it was like if Lucifer and Micheal go on a full blown and I refuse to let it happen. We would all be dead and this planet would be gone. I refuse to let it happen when we have Bella here to help us."

Bella had forgotten that Alice already knew what was going to happen. And she never had realized how much Bobby and the brothers cared about her. But she knew if she didn't fight, they would all die.

It took a few more minutes of silence before Bobby said, "Fine. I'll go find something somewhere. But don't forget I still don't think this is a good idea" And with that he left to his office.

Everyone turned back to Castiel. He didn't say anything but then again he almost never did.

"She wont be going alone." Alice said suddenly.

"I think we are all going…. Except for Bobby cause he cant go…." Dean said looking towards the office.

"Don't say that Cause he just might want to go to make us put up with him." Said Sam chuckling a bit.

"Cas, what have you been up to any who?" Dean asked suddenly.

"I am trying to locate someone that might be able to help us with your powers Bella." He said looking at Bella.

" I thought we gave up on that lead." Dean said looking at the angel.

"I might have found someone else." Was all the angel said.

"Ok well we better get ready to go hunting." Sam said as he got up.

"Wait Cas when are you leaving?" asked Dean .

"As soon as I'm done here. I needed to make sure Bella was being trained fully." Cas said and turned to leave.

"Well it looks like we are going hunting after all." Said Bella with a smile on her face as she got up.

"Yeah don't look so happy about it." Said Dean as he too got up to go pack his things.