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Part 4 of 4

Booze and loneliness do not mix. Derek knew this and he was sure the gorgeous woman beside him knew this too. He wasn't sure how long they had been sitting together, but slowly they began to move closer to each other so that now their forearms were relaxed against one another's. The smooth façade of the uninterested woman he first encountered was beginning to soften. There was one thing about her, she was a giggly, fantastically beautiful drunk, and that wasn't the alcohol talking. It was a mystery to Derek how such a small person could consume so much tequila and still be perfectly adorable. He was having far too good of a time to call it quits before she was ready to leave, and she showed no signs of slowing down.

"I have to pee," she said matter-of-factly as she rotated her seat towards Derek.

She tried to hop gracefully from her bar stool but faltered, and just in time Derek rotated his seat and gently placed his hands on her small waist to steady her. Their proximity closed in around them and from within their bubble he could feel her sweet – hot breath breeze along his ear and touch the hair on the nape of his neck – it shocked his senses. Her flowery scent intoxicated him again and his breathing hitched in his throat when he realized he was still holding onto her.

"Oh, yeah, thanks, so will you still be here when I come back?" she smiled, her green eyes sparkled playfully.

"Yep, I'll even get Joe to get us some water," he said conspiratorially. He trained his eyes on her as she walked away, noticing how her dress hugged her in all the right places. He called Joe over with a raised hand and a nod.

"So, what'll it be and where's your better half?" Joe smiled big.

"Ah, well, ladies room and we need two big tall glasses of ice water, we have to call it quits man –I don't know about Wonder Woman there – but I'm booze-hound tired now, I need sleep," Derek kidded.

"I'm gonna close up here in an hour or so and do the same thing my man, let me get those waters," Joe turned his back and took two large pilsner glasses and filled them with ice and water. He put two straws down on the bar with the glasses, nodded at Derek and sauntered away.

Derek hadn't realized the time; they had been sitting together, laughing and carrying on for close to three hours! He couldn't remember the last time he was engaged for that long without a single thought about the state of his life. Slowly over the course of the hours, the weight of the humiliation he had been shouldering started to ebb.

He felt lighter and more confident and it wasn't because of the flirty banter with his comrade for the evening, it wasn't because she was gloriously beautiful or intellectually sexy, it wasn't because she found him attractive – it wasn't about objectification at all – it was about something entirely different, it was … magical, or pretty close to it.

He couldn't quite put his finger on what it was, but the tide definitely changed, and it came out of nowhere like the signal of thunder in the theater. Yes, the scene had changed, no longer did he feel like that embarrassed, humiliated and deceived man like he said earlier in the evening – "he was just a guy in a bar" – and it felt good.

Again, he wasn't quite sure what it was, but he was fairly certain it was her eyes; they were a captivating green he had never seen before. Derek had a lingering thought that he could stare into those eyes for a long time and never ever grow tired of them. They were deep – a little heartbreaking for someone her age (whatever that might be) – almost as if she had seen everything an old woman would have in an entire lifetime. She really mystified him and he liked to think he had the same affect on her. He was relieved it turned out that his charm hadn't vanished when Addison and Mark snatched his pride.

"Do you think you should check up on her?" Joe asked as he came to their side of the bar again.

"Couldn't hurt," Derek nodded at the suggestion, rose from his barstool and made his way to the restrooms.

He was about to knock on the ladies room door when it flew open and she all but smashed into him, instinctually he found himself steadying her again with his hands on her hips. She looked up at him through her lashes and he could tell her eyes were as tired as his, but she just smiled at him breathlessly.

"So, do you make it a habit of going to the ladies room?" she flirted, her green eyes began to twinkle again albeit the dim light of the hallway.

He moved slightly out of the doorway so she could pass though, but she surprised him by pinning him to the wall across from the door. Derek could feel his heart rate spike as a flash of something insane and completely unknown to him coursed through his body. Without further noticed her lips were on his and her fingers were weaving all through his hair. He was shocked, but caught up with her enthusiasm right away and wasted no time tugging on her bottom lip with his teeth commanding entrance into the soft, warmth of her mouth. Her tongue swept across his teeth and she deepened the kiss again.

They broke away from the impassioned kiss and stared at each other for a brief moment … both stunned … at least he was, what in the hell were they doing? All Derek could hear was their raspy breathing. And then she reached for him again, pulling him to her, but she didn't kiss him right away – a flicker of something crossed her eyes – but within a second her lips were on his again and her unrelenting tongue suffused itself to his in a battle for control. He felt his knees starting to buckle from the pure bliss of kissing this beautiful stranger. Without telling himself to – he wrapped his arms around her tightly – touching the bare skin around her shoulders and neck, she moaned with pleasure as he kissed her senseless right back.

Minutes later they broke from each other for air again, their foreheads touching, eyes piercing one another, Derek pushed a stray piece of her long blond hair behind her ear. She reached up and placed her delicate, slender fingers on his chest, but as soon as she felt his racing heart sear her fingers she moved that hand and looked at him with questioning eyes – silently asking him if he was okay – and then she teased. "You know in some states we could get arrested for this."

He felt shocked that he was so close to making the conscious decision to do more than just kiss this woman, and what was even more incredulous to him was that she wasn't about to hesitate! He looked into the deep pools of her remarkable green eyes again as they smoldered with desire, beautiful was all he thought, and he felt all of his problems fade away.

He caressed the side of her face with both of his hands and gingerly moved his fingers down to her shoulders and then to her waist. She moved her hands down to his waist and tugged on the top of his pants. He brought one hand up and placed it over her racing heart and felt her nipple pucker at his touch through the thin black fabric of her dress. That was all it took … he was a goner.

She gasped and goose bumps broke out along her arms instantly. She shivered. Her eyes searched his for a beat longer and he nodded to her, yes, he was fine – more than fine – his hardened cock was straining against his pants for God's sake, he pulled her even closer still and without words showed her just how fine he really was. She held him close and let out a sigh that came out sounding like a moan and a giggle.

The drowning sensation he felt was dissipating. He felt alive for the first time in a long time. His heart was on fire, his body was tingling, his nerve endings sprung back to life, vessels of all shapes and sizes were filling with blood and he could finally breathe again. Maybe love at first sight wasn't a beautiful myth after all, he thought wryly.

"Well, you better let me take you home then," he said in the most even voice he could muster, hoping against all hope that she wouldn't change her mind. Sex or not, he was alive, his hope was restored and he was ready to reclaim his life as his own again.

She smiled encouragingly with her eyes as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. He felt her arm snake tightly around his waist as they waved to Joe and walked out of the bar and into the damp Seattle night where Derek Shepherd started on the path to that leap of faith he was destined to take.

The End of the Beginning

(of one of the greatest love stories ever in progress)

***

I think Derek Shepherd got the shaft, I think his life was in shambles after what happened to him in New York and for a long time I wanted to explore what might have been going through his mind (or any other person who might walk in on his wife and best friend) I think it is something that never really leaves you and I think in some ways he still had an internal battle going on with what Addison and Mark did to him.

He was so afraid not to be perfect that he lost himself somewhere in the process and I think he is now learning from his mistakes and his journey of self-discovery is leading him towards being that guy, the guy he wanted to be, the dreamy, arrogant, yet loveable guy he projected to Meredith in Season 1.