Sam inhaled, somewhat nervously. "I'm sorry, sir...I...didn't want you to do anything you were going to regret..."

He sighed, allowing himself to calm down. "It's okay, Carter. I was out of line. You did the right thing."

She studied him for a moment before she gathered up the courage to ask him the question on her mind. "That wasn't about a team, was it?" She asked, looking over at him.

"Huh?" He asked, confused.

"That wasn't just about your team, was it?" She asked again.

"Me and Helen?" He asked, looking back at the closed door behind them. "Oh...no...trust me...maybe twenty-five years ago, and maybe if we'd met under different circumstances, but...she's still in love with a guy from the 19th century, and...well...my best friend was on that team..."

"Your best friend?" She asked, surprised.

"We were friends from high school, the Academy and through that mission." He said with a sigh. "When I came home and found out that they were MIA, I tried to get a team together to go back and save them, but they'd disappeared without a trace."

"That must have been tough." She said, compassionately.

"I had to see the look on his parents' face when they realized that he wasn't coming home. When they realized that because of some strange woman's decision to save me and me alone, they weren't going to see their son ever again."

The pain of that memory had probably been compounded with his own son's death, she reasoned. "You blame her for your friend's death?"

He sighed. "I don't know. It's illogical to be so angry with her, but...we still don't know what happened to them."

Sam nodded. "That's the hardest." She admitted.

"Well, it's not easy." He agreed.

They were silent for a moment before he sighed. "The world she opened up to me, Carter...that's the reason I had the gun in the first place..."

She looked at him, confused.

"When I got back from that mission, after I saw the look on Gary's parents' faces...I kept a gun with me at all times. When Sara and I got together, I made her keep one in the house, and though she was uncomfortable with it...she was okay with it..."

"Until Charlie was born." Sam prompted as she felt her heart drop the pit of her stomach as she realized what was going on with his emotions.

"I didn't listen to her. I refused to let any monster get the best of my family. Regular intruders, I could have handled. Even Sara with her civilian self-defense classes and frying pan could have handled them. But monsters?" He asked, pain lining the wrinkles of his face.

She felt tears sting her eyes as she listened to his words.

"The night before Charlie died, I thought I'd heard something downstairs, so I got the gun. Turned out to be a false alarm, and I guess I was half-asleep or something, but I must not have locked the gun away as well as I thought I had."

"It was an accident, sir." She said, touching his arm gently. "It wasn't your fault, and it wasn't Dr. Magnus's fault."

"She protects a world that hunts good men like animals, Carter..."

She inhaled sharply as she studied him. "She's not responsible for every action they take, Jack. She's just a person. Like you and me."

He looked away, clearly unwilling to hear anymore.

"Why don't I take it from here?" She asked, nodding toward the interrogation room.

"That would be best." He admitted. "But I should apologize..."

"I'll handle it, sir. You can send something in writing later."

He nodded slowly as he left.

The door opened, and Sam walked into the room with Helen. She studied the British woman closely for a few moments as she bit the insides of her cheeks. Finally, she opened her mouth. "He's not usually like this."

Helen swallowed. "I'm glad to know that I have such a positive influence, then." She tried to joke.

"When he came back in '85, he had to tell his best friend's parents that they were never going to see their son again." She explained. "And within fifteen years, he had to experience their pain firsthand when his son shot himself with his personal firearm."

Helen watched the younger woman closely.

Sam swallowed. "A firearm that he probably wouldn't have kept in his house if he hadn't realized that there was such a thing as a monster."

Helen closed her eyes as she imagined the pain Jack had gone through. If something happened to Ashley...

"I'm not saying that he was in the right, or that he couldn't have handled this reunion more appropriately, but...I did want you to understand what was going through his mind."

Helen nodded before she looked up at Sam with a knowing eye. The young woman's justification was all-too familiar to her. It sounded like the excuses she'd made in her head for John's madness. "You're in love with him." She said, matter-of-factly.

"He's my commanding officer, and I respect him too much to let you think he's some power hungry leader with anger management issues." She countered, evenly.

"As a second-in-command, you don't have to explain his behavior." Helen said, softly. "As a woman in love, you do. Trust me, I've been there."

Sam exhaled deeply. "You're free to go, Dr. Magnus."

"Thank you." Helen said standing again.

"Did you ever think you could have loved him?" Sam finally blurted.

Helen paused, and looked back. Finally, she shook her head. "It would have been doomed if it had ever started. And he knew it the minute he saw that locket."

Sam looked somewhat confused as the SFs returned a bag with Helen's clothing and personal effects to her.

She reached in, and retrieved an ornate locket. "Ashley's father gave this to me shortly after we became engaged. And until now, I've never taken it off."

With a careful and thoughtful gesture, she put the locket back on. "My love for John is my burden to carry. My cross to bear." She inhaled as she opened it, and gazed at the picture of John Druitt in her locket. She remembered Jack's accusation that she was playing God by choosing who should live and who should die, and how he'd unwittingly cut her with his words. "And perhaps, it has affected my capability of making decisions."

Sam studied the other woman closely.

Helen looked back at Sam. "Thank you for my freedom, Colonel Carter."

"You're welcome."

"Perhaps we will meet again."

"Perhaps." Sam said, watching her closely.

Helen managed a faint and sober smile as she left to change and meet her team.

Sam sighed. This was going to be one interesting debrief with Landry, the Pentagon, and the IOA.

-

Helen, Ashley and Will were escorted to the surface by a team of SFs, and Ashley looked over at her mother. "Are you okay, Mom?"

Helen sighed as she looked forward to the future. "I will be." She assured. "I just...have a lot of things to think about."

"Like?"

Helen remained silent, refusing to burden her daughter with the many questions running through her mind. Encounters such as these always led to a reevaluation, and for that reason, alone, she was grateful for this. Still, they often haunted her dreams as she considered the world and her place in it.

Perhaps like Jack had suggested, she wasn't a savior to the down-trodden. Perhaps she was merely a devil to those who had lived life so bravely in the past. Perhaps she was simply as abnormal to her kind as the others whom she helped were to her protege. Perhaps, they were all simply abnormal.

"Nothing." She said, shaking her head. "It's nothing..."