Epilogue - Halloween, 2001

"And then Daddy let Mommy tackle him, even though she was wearing quite an unnecessarily large amount of iron, because he knew it would make her realize that really, she did love him," The Goblin King said. The small bundle of pink and yellow cloth in his arms gurgled happily.

A lanky, imp-eyed, blonde youth slid from the shadows beside the Goblin King's throne and snorted derisively.

"Better not let Sarah hear you say that. She'd decapitate you if she found out you were fibbing to her offspring," he said, flipping a peculiarly luminous knife with careless, arrogant ease.

Jareth eyed him imperiously.

"I am not fibbing, Tobias, and I take offense to your implication," he said haughtily, and looked down at the little princess in his arms. "All the same, we'd better keep this between you and me. Mommy can be a bit irrational sometimes," he suggested.

"Thought so," Toby said under his breath, and smirked as Jareth tossed a glower at him. "Really, though, it would be pretty amusing if Sarah found out. There'd be lots of fireworks. Probably literally, I'd wager - she's dealing with the Fire Sprites, again, and you know how they get when she brings them gunpowder…" he said thoughtfully, and Jareth narrowed his eyes.

"I see. I wonder what one in your position might find more amusing than watching your brother-in-law being subjected to your sister's wrath," he said carefully. Toby grinned in an altogether unwholesome manner.

"I want to be your Champion during the next Troll Negotiations Session," he said instantly. Jareth scoffed.

"Sarah would slaughter me if she found out I agreed to that. It's far too dangerous. Besides, my Queen is traditionally my Champion, should I require one. And don't bother telling me you've found out about a planned assassination attempt - more or less the entire reason for Troll Negotiation Sessions is for them to attempt to assassinate me, and for me to thwart them."

"You're going to be in trouble either way. At least this way, you have longer to figure out a way around it. Besides, I've been practicing - we both know I'm arguably one of the best knives in the Underground," he reasoned. "But yes, I did hear about an assassination attempt. So you could use the extra help - 'cause we both know Sarah will insist on coming too. And Sarah fighting is bound to be an iron-clad disaster."

"The point of offering me an alternative is to make it more palatable than the one I am currently faced with," Jareth huffed.

"No, the point is force you to choose between two unpalatable options, and convince you to accept the one that benefits me the most," Toby said.

Jareth glared at him. "You're not terribly good at this negotiation business."

Toby grinned in a decidedly sharp manner. "Or maybe I'm too good," he countered. Jareth smirked.

"Well, you're picking up on it faster than Sarah, anyways," he said wryly.

"Be that as it may," I said, dropping the veil I'd been holding and stepping down from the wide-ledged window that had been my hiding place, "I'm better at spying than either one of you, and you are both in so much trouble."

Jareth gulped, as Toby let out a terrified squeak.

Nok cackled gleefully from somewhere to my right.

I grinned, and Jareth paled visibly, while Toby disappeared altogether. That was fine - I'd deal with him later. "Nok, I think Uncle Hoggle is expecting to see baby Elana, now. Be a dear?" I requested. Nok leapt at the opportunity and quickly took charge of Elana, much to Jareth's dismay, and vanished with a slight pop.

I flexed my fingers.

"You know, it's been almost three weeks since I've seen you, Jareth," I said absently. I knew that queens did not typically roam around selling wares, but I liked being a merchant; it was what I did for eight years. So, when my queenly duties were less than pressing, I tended to fall back on the more exciting tasks of haggling and acquiring rare, valuable goods.

Unfortunately, Jareth did not accompany me, so my trips could be a bit lonely sometimes.

Jareth eyed me warily.

"Indeed. I hadn't expected this trip to be quite so lengthy," he said carefully. I sauntered over to him, keeping the dangerous edge to my grin despite the sway of my hips.

"Well, you know. Being so horrid at negotiations, I took a little longer than most to make an acceptable deal," I said carelessly. Jareth winced.

"You know, darling, that was really-"

I sat down on his lap, his throne more than roomy enough for me to comfortably straddle his hips. His eyes widened for a moment, and then he matched up my smile with the familiar hunger I knew was in my eyes, and grinned himself.

"Why, you clever little minx," he said, appreciation in his tone. Toby wouldn't be back for hours, at least, and Baby Elana would distract my friends for quite some time.

And I hadn't seen my husband in three weeks.

I winked at him, and started undoing the laces on his poet shirt, working it loose of his breeches.

"I did learn from the best," I said graciously. Jareth laughed and kissed me, momentarily pulling me to his chest and halting my progress on his shirt.

"All an act, then?"

"Of course not. I'm still gonna kick your ass, later," I replied, and writhed sinuously in his lap. He groaned, though I still saw that flicker of resignation in the back of his eyes. "But that's later."

"Much later," he replied, wrapping his arms around me and instantaneously relocating us to our chambers.

A faint laugh echoed in the Goblin King and Queen's throne room.

AN: Alright, I swear I actually have a valid reason this time - sort of.

Basically, you lot are disturbingly vicious. Honestly, I permanently disfigured Kitten in an extremely unpleasant fashion, at mere mortal Sarah's hands no less, and you still wanted his comeuppance?! Good heavens, what were you expecting? Limb removal via termites? Death by lobster claws? Submergence in an acid vat?I was a little bit afraid there might be mutiny if I didn't give Jareth a go at torturing his distant kin, but it just would not fit into the scene...

However, as I was writing the epilogue, I couldn't help but feel like the story wasn't quite done. So in the works, to be released at a later date, is a tentative sequel. I'm not sure how long it will be, as I only have a partial plot for it at the moment, but eventually, after I get the other loose strings floating around my site tied up, I will get cracking on Kitten demise. :)

Thank you to all my lovely reviewers! Your patience with me is truly invaluable.