Hey Everybody, Max here.

I've been taking a few months off to get situated at college. Boy, oh, boy is it a lot of work. It's also a blast, so I can't complain.

Anyway, for those of you seeing me updating this and wondering 'Hey! Where's Chancellor Moore!', I'll be straight with you. I left all my writing materials for Chance at home. Until I go back, that's going to be on hold. Yeah…

But anyway, on to the disclaimer! SKYLER!

S: What?

Max: I know it's been a while, but… c'mon buddy. For old times sake?

S: Lets see…ah…

Disclaimer: Amaxing is not Zach Braff.

Max: What the… never mind.

A criminal is defined as 'one who breaks away from the mass-accepted law.' More often than not, a thief, gangster, pirate, or other criminal breaks said law in order to improve their own lives, or gain something that they believe the accepted law is unable to give them.

Also more often than not, however, when a particular class of criminal gains a significant number of people, a set of guidelines or laws are set down. For gangsters, this takes the form of 'families', for thieves, there is simply an honor system.

Pirates have a code.

And if a pirate is to break this code, and should there be any doubt as to that man's guilt, a trial is held. Therefore, for every attorney that exists on the proper, aboveground side of the law, there exists another who, more often than not, is called upon to settle the disputes of the underworld.

This is the story of one of them.

Gorgon Zolo: Attorney at Large

The Thousand Suns sailed gracefully along the Grand Line. The time? Before anything involving Ace happened, but after Thriller Barque. If only because the author of this story has, regrettably, been unable to keep up with the manga's storyline up to this point. Not a cloud was in the sky, and the weather was warm and balmy, on account of the summer island that the crew had just departed from. And who, of all the Straw Hat Pirates, would take advantage of such a beautiful day by sleeping it into oblivion? Well, I think we all know the answer to that one.

"Zoro…" Usopp whispered from the deck above the sleeping pirate. "H-hey! Zoro! You've got mail!"

"Are a few pieces of paper and cardboard worth waking up for?" Zoro said angrily, gently feeling around with his hand for Usopp so he knew where to swing.

"Normally, no" Usopp admitted, glad he'd been smart enough to choose a deck a good six feet above Zoro, "but this is a special occasion. I think you've been waiting for this one for a while."

Zoro's eyes opened, and he looked up. "Clever" he admitted. "Are you going to come down here and give to me, or…"

"No, no…" Usopp said, backing away slightly. "I think this'll be just fine, thank you very much. Here, I'm throwing it down now, just make sure you catch…"

The package hit Zoro squarely in the face. By the time the swordsman had recovered and began to look for Usopp, the marksman was already back in his room, quivering behind a bolted door.

"Whatever…" Zoro shrugged, resolving to dangle Usopp over the deck later. He tore into the packaging, not unlike a schoolboy on Christmas, and eagerly pulled out the piece of metal he'd worked so hard to achieve. With it, there was a note, which simply read:

This attorney's badge is proof of recognition by the World Government that Gorgon Gouda Zolo is certified to practice law in any W.G. courthouse.

Zoro smiled. It's about time… he thought to himself, before beginning an introductory soliloquy.

My name is Roronoa Zoro, and I'm the first mate of the world infamous Straw Hat Pirate Crew. Most of you already know that. What you might not know is that, in recent months, I've also become a semi-famous attorney, under the false name: 'Gorgon Zolo'. It's… a long story. It's also already been written, so feel free to look back and catch up before continuing. You're welcome.

All caught up? What's it been, a week? Damn you read slowly. Anyway, as you probably noticed, I wasn't exactly keen on the whole attorney business when I first started. But the pay is decent, and Nami's actually beginning to respect me just enough to start relieving some of my debt, which is pretty nice. And now, after a few months of off-screen studying, training, and exam-taking, I've become a licensed attorney. I'm sure that the first thing I'll do with this newfound certification is preside over a perfectly straightforward, conventional, and entirely legal case. Anything other than that wouldn't make any logical sense.

"MAIL CALL!" came Nami's voice from two feet away. Zoro reeled back, grasping his eardrums in both shock and pain.

"When the hell did you get that close?"

"Pretty good, huh?" The tangerine-haired one smiled.

"Pretty good… for what?"

"For my ninja training!" She said, smiling broadly. "Instead of spending way too much time wondering if a pirate or a ninja would win in a fight, I'm going to master both art forms! Pretty smart, huh?"

"Scribblenauts has already proven that pirates beat ninjas," said Zoro. "And…. wait a minute, didn't mail just go? I'm fairly certain that was Usopp's reason for bothering me too."

"Eh?" She frowned. "No… mail definitely didn't just go. The letter-carrier bird just came a minute ago."

"Along with my attorney's badge?"

"You got your attorney's badge?" Nami asked happily. "When did you…"

"Today" Zoro interrupted.

Nami paused, and looked down at the letter in her hand. "Then what's this about? You would think that the government would send notices like this through the actual mail service..."

"The government sent me a letter?" Zoro asked in shock.

"Well, who else would make it out to Gorgon Zolo, Attorney at Law?" Nami asked, confusion very clearly written across her face.

Zoro grabbed the letter quickly, meriting an offended grunt from Nami. The envelope was, indeed, addressed to Gorgon Zolo, Attorney at Law, and had the Thousand Sun's false registration code beneath the name. Curious, Zoro tore into the envelope, and removed the letter within.

To Gorgon Zolo (Aka. Roronoa Zoro)

There is no official request form for this sort of thing, seeing as we're pirates. To tell the truth, pirate tribunals haven't been held for years, but this is kind of a special case. Things are kind of crazy over here right now, and we need someone who's had experience with this kind of thing to lead the defense, or someone's going to be lynched.

Coordinates are enclosed. Get over here as quickly as possible. If you refuse this request, it will constitute a betrayal of the pirate's code of conduct, and a vast bounty will be offered for the one who removes your crew from the waters. Bet you don't want that on your head, do you?

Hoping to see you soon (for both our sakes),

Foxy. The Silver Fox. You do remember me, right?

"… we, uh… should probably go, huh?" Nami asked, innocently enough.

Zoro sighed. "Why couldn't this be a normal field trip?"

"With the Max?" Nami laughed. "No way!"

"Ooooh…"

-

I don't know if anyone remembers this series, but it's back. If you're interested in the rest of the story, drop me a comment. I do promise there is more. Like, legitimately have it mapped out from this point. Honest. No, I'm not being overly defensive. Shut up. You don't know what you're talking about.