Author's note: First of all, yes, this is the last chapter of this AU story Repercussions. It was hard to write and I confess that, at times, I didn't want to. But I kept reminding myself that it's not really the end of the story I want to tell. I started with Aftershock, then Repercussions. The full story will be wrapped up in my next story, tentatively titled Face the Strange. Yes, I'm finally getting David Bowie in there.

Second, thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has been patient in following this story that's taken me so long to finish. You're all very dear to me and I can't begin properly to show my appreciation. I hope you enjoy this last chapter.

Third, my apologies. Not only for taking so long to get this posted. I have to apologize in advance because I will not be able to respond right away to any reviews or comments. I'll be away from my PC for the next few days. I will respond as soon as I can.

Last of all, thank you again for all the lovely reviews and Alert and Favorite listings. I'm humbled and grateful.

Oh, one more thing. The song lyrics used in this chapter are an anachronism. They are from the song Maybe by Ingrid Michaelson, released in 2009. When I first heard the song, it was so perfect for Alex and Gene that I had to use it.

All things "Ashes to Ashes" are the property of BBC, Kudos, etc. All original characters are the products of my own imagination and no resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended, either through name or personality or actions.

Repercussions

Chapter 18

Going Home

I don't wanna be the one to say goodbye. But I will, I will, I will.

I don't wanna sit on the pavement while you fly.

But I will, I will, oh, yes, I will.

They sat at opposite ends of the sofa. Gene was on one end, leaning forward, elbows on knees, playing with a cigarette but making no move to light it. Alex was curled up in the corner opposite him, hands clasped in her lap. She studied Gene carefully, noting that he was ill-at-ease. Alex herself felt tense and unsure. During the past few months, the two of them had gotten closer. They spoke of their lives with more ease, confessed their deepest feelings with more confidence and trust. But those revelations also made them more vulnerable. Alex and Gene were people who had been deeply hurt in the past and found trust difficult. Any perceived violation of that trust and they pushed away.

Gene had felt Alex violated that trust with her insistence on the future and demands that he take care of her and Molly. So he pushed her away. Now, without any further prompting from Alex, he returned to say, "I believe you."

He continued to hold the cigarette. Alex turned to the end table, knowing a candle and matches were there. She took the box of matches and struck one, holding it out for Gene. His attention drawn to her actions, he leaned forward to light his cigarette. Alex blew out the match. The simple gesture seemed to ease the tension between them.

"Why?" Alex asked aloud.

Gene met her gaze. He frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Just that," she returned. "Why do you suddenly believe me?"

"Women!" he snorted. "Not enough for me to say I believe everything. No. Women always want to know why."

"So I'm just supposed to say, 'Thank you, dearest' and be done with it? You've changed your mind this fast. How am I to know you won't change it again?"

"Because I'm not a woman!" Gene snapped. "I don't let hormones and the time of month do my thinking for me! I'm not ruled by my emotions!"

"Not ruled by your emotions?" Alex huffed in exasperation. She crossed her arms. "Who's the one always going on about his gut instinct? I'll match my reasoning skills against your gut anytime!"

"Gut instinct isn't emotion! It's – " Gene stood. Alex half expected him to leave. Instead, he paced and smoked and seemed to ignore her. She knew they were fighting in order delay the real issue. The idea of the future and what it might hold for them was still hard to face. Neither of them said anything. But Gene stopped pacing and stood in front of Molly's picture, examining it for a moment. That action puzzled Alex. Why was he now so interested in the portrait? She was about to ask when he turned to face her. He tilted his head back a little, in that cocky, self-assured way that she always found irritating and endearing.

"Gut instinct isn't emotion," he said. "It's survival when you're young. It's experience when you're grown. It's seeing everything and putting it together." He sat beside her again. "The computer."

"The computer?"

"That first day. You sat down at my desk and complained that the computer didn't work. You expected it to do more."

Alex nodded. "I use – used PCs – personal computers everyday. For – everything. Research. Information. Entertainment."

"Yeah, yeah. That's just it. You thought my computer should do the same." Gene ground out the cigarette and reached for another, then put the pack down, not taking one. "Just like Sam," he said, meeting Alex's gaze. "He talked about computers sometimes. And he knew things, like you do. Things that were gonna happen. Songs. Movies. Like you watching The Man from Snowy River the other night. I don't even know if you were aware of it. You'd grab my arm or lean forward or say, 'Watch!' Then something would happen, like Jessica falling or Jim following the horses down the mountain. And – the Prices. You knew what would happen. The explosion. You knew where and when and you were frantic."

The emotions of that day came back to Alex. Being so close to saving them – and failing – and seeing them die. She looked away, trying not to cry.

"There!" Gene said. "The way you look right now. When you're trying to control your emotions. You purse your lips. Just like you did that day. When you were – " He paused. "When you were eight years old. And I carried you into CID." Alex met his eyes. They were full of compassion and love. "You were shaking and so scared and I told you it would be all right."

"I don't remember that it was you," she whispered. "I only remember that someone held me and made me feel safe."

Gene reached out to touch her cheek. "I don't know how you got here. I'm not sure why. But I do know there's another little girl who needs to feel safe. And you belong with her."

"Gene," Alex sobbed. He pulled her into his arms, letting her cry on his shoulder. After a minute she got control. "What happens now?" she asked.

He eased her away and smiled. "Don't you know?"

"No."

"I do." Gene stood. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes," Alex nodded.

"Will you do what I say?"

"Yes."

He held out his hand. Alex took it and stood. "If you tell me to click my heels together and say, 'There's no place like home…'" she said, smiling.

"Nah. Nothing that complicated," Gene answered.

"Then what?"

Gene began to lead the way to the bedroom. "We get some kip. Don't know about you, but I'm knackered."

##########

Alex lay curled up, sound asleep, at Gene's side. She seemed more at peace than he'd seen in a very long time. He, on the other hand, was wide awake and felt more troubled. His explanation about changing his mind was only partly true. After his dream about Sam, Gene had awakened knowing that Alex was not delusional or lying. She was from the future, just like Sam. But while he wanted to tell her, Gene wasn't sure about how to say it. Sam visits me in my dreams and made me see that you're from the future. Oh, and Molly's been following me around.

But it all came down to something Sam had said. Faith and trust. Did Gene have it in him to believe in Alex? And to believe in himself enough to let her go – and wait?

And in the end, he came to one conclusion: it was worth the chance.

Gene had never considered himself to be a man of great faith. But now he understood that he had to find that belief. He'd need it if he was to spend the next twenty-five years without the woman he loved.

So it was a leap of faith. Giving up Alex in the hopes of finding her again. And while it broke his heart, Gene knew it was important. For a lot of reasons.

##########

Alex woke with the first light. She felt Gene behind her, his body matching the curve of hers, so that they were nestled like spoons. His arm was draped over her waist, and Alex enjoyed the way their bodies fit perfectly together.

Carefully easing away, trying not to disturb him, Alex managed to turn around to face Gene. He didn't wake, but rolled onto his back. She studied his handsome features, taking in the scars on his face and the lines around his eyes. The signs of a life that hadn't been easy. Yet for all his rough edges, Gene Hunt had never given up his humanity. He still wanted to help others. He cared for his team. He believed in justice.

And he loved Alex Drake.

That was a mystery she found hard to comprehend. Gene was a man who claimed to want a subservient woman. Yet he'd fallen in love with her. Not just a woman who defied him at every turn when she arrived, but a woman who'd eventually become his boss. At least in title. Their life together these past few months had been like a dream. In spite of their spats, in spite of out and out furious arguments, they always found their way past those times. Alex felt they were stronger for it.

But they also had fun. Days off, when they could spend time exploring London or the surrounding country – or each other – those were times Alex treasured. Gene wasn't the Guv then. He was a man who opened up and shared his heart and soul with her. Not a lot, of course. But he'd mention something from his childhood or a case that affected him or a time with Sam. Little things that gave Alex insight to Gene Hunt.

When she'd first landed there, Alex had been amazed to find herself so attracted to him. Everything Sam had related about Gene led her to think that he was the kind of man she'd despise. Maybe Sam had claimed to find a heart in his DCI. Alex knew that she'd just find him entirely disagreeable and loathsome.

But then she had seen glimpses of the man Sam had described. Gene was not just the most brilliant detective she'd ever known. That alone intrigued her. But there was a vulnerable side to Gene that drew her in and made her want to know him better. And somewhere along the line, she'd fallen in love, a love so strong and deep it stunned her. She'd had no idea that she was capable of feeling this way.

And now she was planning to leave him. And even though it would be to return to her daughter, the knowledge that Gene would be alone for so long broke her heart.

There was still a chance that nothing would ever happen, that she'd stay where she was. Alex wondered sometimes if this world was real. If Gene was real. How could it be? To travel back in time to this man who changed her life? That was impossible.

But her feelings for him were as real as anything she'd ever known.

And now she was going to hurt him.

"It'll be all right, Bolly."

Startled, Alex met Gene's silver-blue eyes. As her mind had wandered, so had her gaze. She hadn't even realized that he was awake. While she was so troubled about what might happen, Gene appeared resigned to whatever the fates had in store for them.

"I'm so sorry, Gene," she whispered. "I never meant to hurt you."

He put his arms around her. "Shhh. It'll be all right," he said.

##########

For the rest of the week, Gene was on edge, not sure what would happen. He couldn't help thinking that Alex would disappear at any moment. Alex herself didn't act any differently. Gene wondered if that was because she was used acting as if there was nothing unusual about her being there. During the day, she was the same efficient copper she'd been from Day One. In the evenings at Luigi's, they kept a routine of talking about work. It was all to maintain that illusion that everything was the same, even while they knew that it wasn't. Everything had changed with Gene's believing that Alex was from the future.

As night fell, however, they would cling to each other, as if knowing that their time was short. Their lovemaking was gentle, yet there was urgency to it. Even in their sleep, Gene or Alex would reach out, as if to assure themselves that the other was there.

Gene was relieved about one thing. There were no more dreams of Sam – and no more visions of Molly. Gene's acceptance of Alex's story seemed to have gotten them off his back. But their message had been clear and it remained on his mind.

On Friday evening Alex and Gene sat at their usual table in Luigi's, sharing a bottle of red wine and celebrating the conviction of Ronnie Breen for the murder of Ralphie Leech and the hit-and-run of Billy Winston. The little boy had made a full recovery from his injuries and had visited Fenchurch East that afternoon.

"Here's to justice," Alex said, raising her glass.

Gene returned the toast. "And to brave little boys."

Alex's eyes softened and Gene felt embarrassed. He hadn't even realized the connection to his son as he said the words. His Bolly would claim that as his subconscious working – and she'd probably be right. Remembering his own little son made Gene wonder if there might be enough time…

He took her hand, not caring who might see. "Alex, I've not been to my Billy's grave in a few months. Would you go with me this weekend?"

She searched his face, then smiled. "Yes," she said.

##########

Early Saturday morning they left for Manchester. The drive started with general conversation. But Alex gently turned the subject to Gene's life before London. To her relief, he didn't resist. He'd been alone, keeping to himself most of his life. Gene based all his relationships on trust. Without that, there could be nothing else. Sam had been his closest friend, and Alex was sure that her fellow time traveler had heard these stories. And now Gene had Alex, a woman who had become his colleague and partner, then friend, and now lover.

So few close relationships. Gene had lost Sam. And now, he was faced with losing Alex. And being alone again. The fact that he could accept that she would leave and still love her broke Alex's heart. Why did it have to be that way?

"Never thought I'd leave Manchester," Gene told her. "Except for national service, never lived anywhere else. I love it. It's my city." He was quiet for a moment before adding, "It was my city. After everything that happened – Billy, Madeleine, Sam – it just didn't feel like home anymore."

"What about your parents?" asked Alex. "And Sam told me you had a brother who died."

Again there was silence and Alex thought she might've pushed a little too much. But Gene answered, "Mam died a few months before Sam. She was the strongest person I've ever known. Put both you and me to shame. My dad didn't do well after the war. Heard him say that he gave his best years to the army and he had nothin' left. Drank too much. Bad with his temper. Had a hard time keeping a job. Mam kept us together and kept us goin'. She was a marvel – even with a husband who took everything out on her. At least he did until I got old enough to protect her. He died when I was seventeen.

"Stu was – he never – " Gene stopped talking. Alex waited, but when he didn't speak again, she stole a glance at him. His knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel. He caught her eye and relaxed his hold. She placed a hand on his arm.

"I was lucky, Alex," he explained. "I always knew who I was and what I was meant to do. I was put on this earth to protect people who couldn't protect themselves. And to punish the ones who hurt others. But Stuart had no idea what he was or what he was supposed to do. He was brilliant. Could've gone to university if he'd made up his mind to it. But he was a working class kid who never saw a decent future for himself. He looked like his dad and decided to be like him. Couldn't keep a job. Got into fights. Finally took to drugs. Disappeared from home. I looked for him. Found him in the morgue."

"I'm so sorry, Gene."

He squeezed her hand in thanks, but said nothing more.

##########

The sun was out when they arrived in Manchester. The air was cool, but not uncomfortable. They stopped at a flower shop on the way. Gene seemed surprised when Alex bought a several bouquets as well. "You don't mind?" she asked.

"No," he replied, shaking his head.

As they had neared the city, Gene had grown more quiet. That continued now as they drove to the cemetery. Alex understood that it was difficult for Gene to share this moment, and she was touched by his decision to ask her to come with him.

There were a few other people around, but no one near graves of the Hunt family. Gene took off his driving gloves and left them in the Quattro. He slowly led the way. They put bouquets first at the headstones of his parents and Stuart. Then they turned to Billy's grave and laid flowers there. They stood in silence for a moment. Gene took Alex's hand in his.

"He was a good boy, my Billy," he said. "Smart. Loved games and puzzles and silly jokes. Funny how kids can understand jokes so young. He could read and write some. He'd write out his name. William James Hunt. When he was feeling well, he always wanted to kick the ball around. Loved watching football with me.

"He'd be a man now. Eighteen. I think he'd've been a good man. I'd've done all I could to make him a good one."

Gene's grip tightened a bit. Alex entwined her fingers with his and put her head on his shoulder, wanting to be as close as possible. As close as he'd allow in this moment.

"I dream about him," Gene continued. "He's a little older in my dreams, but not much. He's still a kid. And he's healthy and strong. He's always running. Sometimes I run alongside him. Sometimes he's ahead of me and I can't keep up. I tell him to slow down, come back. And he just looks back at me and laughs and keeps running. Don't need to be a psychologist to figure that one.

"I miss him. He was my boy, and I miss him."

They stood a moment. Alex was surprised to find herself saying a silent prayer for her lover and the son he'd lost so long ago. She thought that she'd lost her faith years ago. But she felt moved to say a prayer, especially for Gene. Did anyone ever truly recover from the death of a child?

Gene turned his head toward her. "I suppose in your time there's a cure for leukemia," he said.

Alex straightened. "If you mean a shot or a vaccine, no," she replied. "Always research and new treatments. Sometimes the cancer goes into remission. But there are no guarantees."

Returning his attention to the grave, Gene said, "It's not right. Kids shouldn't suffer."

"No, they shouldn't."

"Alex, would you – " His voice trailed off.

She understood. "I'll wait in the car."

##########

Gene lay on the hotel bed, listening to the shower running in the bathroom as Alex got ready for dinner. He was glad that he'd brought her to Manchester. As difficult as it was for him, he wanted to share this part of his life with her. And this would be their only chance. When they got back to London…

He put aside thoughts of their return as Alex emerged from the bathroom, wearing his robe, her hair wrapped in a towel. "So," she said. "Did you think about calling Madeleine?"

"I did. She and Zoe are on their way to London. Zoe's parents' anniversary. Not sure we're ready to break bread together anyway."

"Maybe not. Where are you taking me for dinner?"

He stood and went to her. "It's a surprise. Just wear something slutty."

"Sorry. I only brought sexy, not slutty."

"Bugger."

Alex giggled. "Bathroom's all yours," she said.

"Then give me my robe."

"I'll bring it in."

"Now."

"It's cold in here!"

Gene pulled her close and kissed her hard. Alex melted in his embrace. He untied the sash of the robe and slipped his arms around her waist. "Gene," she sighed.

"Warmed up?" he asked.

"Mm-hmm." She left a trail of kisses along his jaw.

"Good." Gene pushed the robe off her shoulders and swept it away from her. "Thanks," he said, walking into the bathroom.

Alex gasped as the cool air hit her bare skin. "Bastard!"

##########

It was twilight when they left the hotel. "Why are we in such a rush? A bit early for dinner, isn't it?" Alex asked.

"Thought we'd go for a drink first," Gene answered.

Alex stopped in her tracks. "The Railway Arms?"

Scowling at her, Gene said, "See, that's the problem dating another detective. Can't surprise 'em. Always figure things out. We'll have dinner at another place, but yeah, Railway Arms first. Almost everyone I know will be there."

"Even on a Saturday night?"

"Why not?"

Grinning, Alex nodded. "Is this why you asked me to wear something slutty?"

"Nah. That was just for me."

She took a step back and gave him a sly look. "And what do you think?"

Gene examined her. "Red dress huggin' every curve. Perfect."

"Thank you." She ran a finger down the front of his shirt. "You're very handsome, too, in your new suit."

"All right, all right," he groused, a little embarrassed. "Let's get in the car."

##########

As they entered, Alex's first impression was that it was exactly as Sam had described it. Nothing fancy. Just a good neighborhood pub. They stood just inside the door and looked around. Some men were playing darts. There were a few couples at tables. The music was low and people could hear each other talk. Overall, there was a feeling about the place that was hard to pinpoint. Then Alex realized what it was: camaraderie. These people were cops. They worked hard together. At the pub, they could relax and talk and even fall in love. They could ignore the bad part of the job and laugh about the good things. Alex wasn't certain, but she'd be willing to bet a month's wages that cop bars were the same the world over.

A lyrical voice rang out, loud enough for all to hear. "Mon brave! Guv!"

The accent, the dreadlocks, the great smile. This had to be Nelson. "Come in!" the bartender continues. "Everyone! The Guv is back!"

Gene and Alex were suddenly surrounded by cops of all ages. Everyone wanted to shake hands with the Guv. Alex marveled at the way he was greeted. She was content to watch but noticed that most everyone was eyeing her with open curiosity and nodding in her direction.

Nelson finally asked the question on everyone's mind. "Guv! Who's this fine lady you've brought?"

For a moment, Gene seemed at a loss for words. How was he supposed to introduce her? Girlfriend? Colleague? Or, worst of all, Boss? Then he recovered.

"This is DCI Alex Drake of the Metropolitan Police. Excellent copper. And, no, we're not here on business. We're here to get a drink. Who's buying?"

"First is on the house," Nelson replied. "After that, you're on your own."

They seated themselves at a nearby table and for the next hour, Alex got to know members of the Manchester Police. She and Gene sidestepped questions about their relationship, although Alex was in no doubt that the detectives had things figured out. There were some notable absences from the place. "I was hoping to meet Phyllis," she said to Gene.

"She retired last year," he replied. "Moved to some little village where her cousin lives, near the Scottish border. Probably started solving crimes there, like a grumpy Miss Marple."

Leaning closer, Alex said, "And Annie?"

Gene just shook his head and she let the subject drop.

"I'm going to the bar to get another glass of wine," Alex said, standing up. "Do you want anything?"

"Another pint."

Nelson smiled as she approached the bar. "Another red for me, please," Alex said. "And another pint for the Guv."

"Happy to oblige," he said. Nelson nodded toward Gene. "Good to see the Guv happy again. I think you had something to do with that. He was a very sad man when he left Manchester."

Something about the last few sentences caught Alex's attention. Nelson's Caribbean accent had vanished. Just as Sam had told her. The stereotypical island persona was an act Nelson assumed for most of the customers. She said as much to the bartender and he raised an eyebrow.

"You knew Sam?" he asked.

"Well, we never met, but we corresponded."

"I see." Nelson poured the wine, then gave her a searching look. "Tell me, Alex, do you come from the same place as Sam?"

Startled, Alex took a step back. She could feel the blood drain from her face. "What do you mean?" she asked.

Nelson refilled Gene's glass. "Sam sometimes seemed out of place when he first got here. After a time, he settled in. But he always had a look in his eye, like he knew something no one else did. Except maybe for Annie." He placed the glass on the bar and leaned forward. "You have the same look about you. But there's one big difference."

Did Nelson really know about Sam? Or was it just the observations of a man accustomed to reading people? "And what's that?" Alex asked. "What's the difference?"

"Once Sam settled in, he belonged here. But you. You don't really belong here, do you? There's somewhere else you want to be. Need to be." Alex looked away. Nelson went on. "It'll be all right. The Guv will be fine, mon cher."

Again the bartender had surprised her. Alex met his eyes. "Will he?"

"Yes. And he'll be there when you need him. It's his way. You'll do the same. I know. Have faith."

Looking into Nelson's dark eyes, Alex was tempted to believe all that he said. Sam had said that Nelson seemed to know things, understand…

"Where are you from, Nelson?"

"It's not where we're from," he replied. "It's where we are and what we do there. Me? I'm where I belong." He held out his hand. "It's good to meet you, Alex."

Alex shook his hand and smiled. "And you, Nelson."

##########

There was something different about being in Manchester. In London, they had to be careful and avoid being seen out together, especially at any posh places. Harder to explain than sharing a table at Luigi's. But in Manchester, Gene felt he could take Alex to the finest restaurant. Nearly every man checked her out as they walked in. Gene practically felt the buttons pop on his shirt. The most beautiful woman in the place – and she was with him.

He asked if she wanted to go dancing after dinner, but Alex shook her head. She reached over and placed her hand on his. "Let go back to the hotel," she said softly.

When he'd called for the hotel reservation, Gene had requested a king-sized bed. They made good use of the extra space, stretching out and taking time to explore and arouse. And it was fun to roll over and not worry about sending the other off the side.

Afterward, they lay facing each other. Alex ran her fingers through Gene's hair and traced his jaw, ending at his chin. "Have I ever told you I love this cleft in your chin?" she asked.

"I think you might've mentioned it once or twice," he returned, smiling at her.

"Have I ever told you that I love you?"

He took her hand and kissed her fingertips. "Once or twice."

##########

Gene looked at the clock. It was after midnight. Alex lay by his side, sleeping peacefully. But once again, Gene found that he couldn't sleep. It was Sunday morning. In a few hours, they'd be going back to London. And once there…

Rolling to his side, he gazed at the beautiful woman who had changed his life. He wanted to memorize everything about her. Before it was too late.

##########

They took their time going back to London. While they chatted during the trip, there were long stretches when they hardly spoke. As they got closer to the city, Gene looked at her. "Bolly? Tell me about that day. When all this started. When Layton shot you."

Puzzled, Alex replied, "I thought I'd told you everything."

"I'm just trying to understand how it could've happened. Why you came here."

"I thought it was to save my parents, but – but that didn't change." Alex looked out the side window. "That day at South Bank," she began, "I did everything wrong."

##########

I don't want to be the first to let it go, but I know, I know, I know,

If you have the last hands that I want to hold, then I know I've got to let them go.

As they climbed the stairs to the flat, Alex started to shiver a little. She knew what was coming, had known it all weekend.

"What would you like for dinner?" Alex asked as they went in. "We can go back out for something or I can see what I have here." She went into the kitchen and began opening cupboard doors while Gene deposited her suitcase in the bedroom.

"I'll make us a pot of tea first," continued Alex. "Then we can decide on dinner."

Gene stopped at the entrance to the kitchen and held out his hand. Alex stopped her rummaging and walked over to him. She slipped her hand into his and he led her to the sofa. "Don't say it," she whispered.

"I have to. Don't you see?"

Alex swallowed hard, trying to ease the tightness in her throat.

Gene took a deep breath. It was one of the hardest things he'd ever do, but it was time. "You can go, Alex."

Beautiful hazel eyes searched his. He could see the heartbreak there. "Go," she echoed.

"I told you that you couldn't leave until I said you could. Well, I'm telling you now. You can leave. Go home to Molly."

"Gene –" Alex gripped his hand, her eyes now on the floor.

"You asked why I believe you now. The truth is, I didn't want to. I had dreams about Sam."

"Sam?"

"Yeah. Like he was haunting me. Kept telling me that I had to let you go. I don't know if it was really him or my conscience. If I could, I'd keep you here forever. But I don't have that choice."

Alex put her arms around him. "Why does it have to be this way?" she sobbed.

"I don't know, luv," Gene admitted, holding her tightly for a moment before releasing her. "I just know that Molly needs you and you need her." He smiled a little. "She's been letting me know that for weeks now."

Looking at him in confusion, Alex asked, "What are you talking about?"

Gene got up from the sofa and walked over to Molly's portrait. The child's blue eyes seemed to reach inside of him. "She's been following me. I knew somebody was there. Thought it was one of Wilkins's men. Caught somebody, too. Ben Owen. Told Wilkins to back off. But that didn't stop the feeling I kept having. Somebody else was there. I never could see who it was. Finally I realized it was a little girl. Molly. Like she was asking me when her mum was coming home."

Turning back around, Gene smiled at Alex. "She needs you and you need her."

"But – how could she – " Alex was pale with fright. "She's haunting you? Like a -"

"No." He sat again and took her hands. "You've seen her, waiting for you. Maybe that's why I can see her, too. Or maybe it's my conscience again. I don't know."

Some color had returned to Alex's cheeks. "I had a dream about her the other night," she said, her eyes on the portrait. "She was reading to me while I was in the coma. I said her name. She was so excited. I miss her." Alex returned her gaze to Gene. "But you…"

"I'm a grown man. I'll be fine. Molly needs you. She's a young girl who needs her mother. And you need her. If I kept you here, you'd never really be happy. And soon you'd regret it and you'd be angry with me."

"No." Fresh tears came to her eyes. Gene cupped her face.

"Bolly. It'll be all right. You go back. And when you wake up, I'll be there." He grinned at her. "By my figuring, I'll be 71 years old. And when you're well and strong, I'm gonna shag your brains out." Alex started laughing. "I'm gonna live to be 100 and I'm gonna spend that time with you," he went on. "And I'm gonna die in your arms – hopefully after shaggin' you one last time."

She put her arms around his neck. "I'll hold you to that."

"I hope so."

##########

Although he had planned to leave, Gene stayed the night with Alex. They knew it would be their last time together. In so many ways, it was like their first time, full of love and need and promise. But it was, at the same time, bittersweet. Alex cried and Gene held her, stroking her hair and wondering how he could get the coming years without her.

The next morning was all the more difficult as he gathered some of his things. Alex watched him, sadness in her eyes. "I suppose we do need to do this," she said.

"I think it's better if we make it a clean break," Gene replied. "That way – " He paused. "I'll – I'll get your things from my place and bring them over."

"And I'll do the same here with your things."

He smiled a little. "You'll give me back my socks, won't you?"

Alex laughed. "Yes, I'll give you back your socks."

Gene went to her. He lifted her chin and kissed her softly. Then he left.

##########

On Wednesday evening, Chris and Shaz were at their usual table at Luigi's when Ray, uninvited, dragged a chair over to sit with them.

"Whaddaya reckon?" the DS asked.

"About what?" Chris returned.

"The Guv and Drake." Ray gave a quick nod in the direction of Gene's table. Their Guv sat alone, drinking and smoking. Alex was nowhere to be seen.

"I reckon they broke up," Shaz said.

The men nodded, but Ray wasn't satisfied with leaving it there. "It's unnatural," he said. "They don't seem angry at each other. He's not yellin'. She's not freezin' him out. That doesn't make any sense."

"Yeah," Chris agreed. "They just seem – sad."

"Sometimes that's the way it is," Shaz told them. "Just sad."

##########

Alex had thought that as the week went on, she'd begin to adjust to being without Gene. But it was harder than she could have imagined. They managed to work together, but she longed to go home with him and spend the evenings in his company and the nights in his arms. The pain of being without him wasn't just in her heart but in her soul.

She would catch herself looking in his direction, hoping that he would do the same to her. And he often did. For that moment, it was as if they were still lovers as well as friends. Then one of them would glance away.

Gene spent as much time as possible away from the station. It hurt too much to know that Alex was there, so close – but that they had to be apart. A few times he was ready to believe that he was a chump to accept all this nonsense about the future. She might be right there at Fenchurch East for the next five or ten years and they'd have to be apart all that time.

He got back to the station late Thursday afternoon, thinking that Alex would be gone. But she was just putting on her suit jacket when he came in. No one else was in CID. It was their first time alone together since Monday morning.

"How are you?" she asked.

"All right," Gene said. "You?"

"Fine." She hesitated, then added. "I have all your things together. It took a while to find everything." Alex's eyes went to the floor, then back to him. "And it was painful to do."

"For me, too, Bolly," he admitted.

They stood together a moment, neither wanting it to end. Gene finally broke the silence. "You know the team wants to celebrate your birthday tomorrow night."

Alex smiled. "I'd like that."

He returned the smile. "Act surprised."

"I'm not supposed to know?"

"Course not. But I just didn't want you taking off for your flat and getting into your jammies. Just go along with it when Shaz suggests a drink."

"I will." She moved toward the door. "Are you going to be staying here long?"

"No. I was going to check some files, but that can wait till tomorrow." Gene walked out with her, turning out the lights as they left. Alex paused for a moment, looking back toward her office.

"Funny," she said. "I feel as though I've left something undone." She shook her head. "Oh, well. Can't think of it. As you said, it can wait."

The station was quiet as they left. Gene got out his cigarettes but didn't light up right away. "Alex," he said. "I can bring your things around this evening."

He saw her stiffen, but then she nodded. "All right. In about an hour?"

"Yeah."

##########

By the time Gene arrived, Alex had showered and changed – and had a drink. Anything to dull the pain she felt. He came in with a rather large box. Strange how she could have accumulated so much since landing here with only the clothes on her back. "Just take it into the living room," she directed. "Your things are in there, too."

"Right." Gene went through and deposited the box on the floor, next to two smaller boxes. "That's about it then," he said. He turned to Alex and frowned. "Almost everything."

"What?"

A pained expression came to Gene's face. "Something Sam said in my dream. 'You even put an anchor around her neck.'"

Alex gasped and placed a hand over the gold pendant. Gene's Christmas present. "No," she whispered. "I haven't taken it off since you gave it to me."

"I know." Gene crossed the room. "I might not have thought of it if I hadn't seen it just now."

Tears rolled unchecked down Alex's cheeks. "Please. Don't."

She was his anchor. She kept him from drifting. But Gene knew that Sam wouldn't have mentioned the pendant if it wasn't important. "It's time, Bolly," he said.

"It's all I have of you," she said pleadingly.

"I'm sorry."

Alex closed her eyes as Gene unclasped the necklace. He held it for a moment before putting it in his coat pocket. Then he went back to the boxes.

"It's really over," Alex said, wiping away her tears.

He turned to face her again. "Yeah."

Looking into those beautiful blue eyes, Alex thought of the future. If she did go home, Gene would stay here. Alone. For a long time. "Gene, there's something I want you to do," she said. "I know I've asked so much of you, but I want you to hear me out."

"What?"

She went over to him. "I want you to make a life for yourself. If you find someone you can love, I want you to be with her. Marry her. Have kids. Make a life for yourself." Damn it, she was crying again. Alex ignored the tears. "Promise me! Don't be alone!"

Giving her a sad smile, Gene said, "That's not gonna happen, Bolly."

"It might. You deserve to be happy, Gene!"

He brushed away her tears and kissed her softly. "I will be."

##########

Alex woke before dawn the next day. Through habit she reached for Gene. But he wasn't there. Rolling over, she looked up at the ceiling. She hadn't gotten much sleep. For a long time she'd lain there, crying, before drifting off.

"Happy birthday, Alex," she murmured.

Knowing that she wouldn't get back to sleep, she threw back the covers and climbed out of bed. Showered last night – and no one to shower with this morning. May as well go in early.

Dawn was breaking as she left the flat. The street was quiet. No one was in sight.

No. Wait. There was someone. Alex saw a child out of the corner of her eye.

A young girl.

Whipping around, Alex saw the girl going around the corner, her long brown hair blowing in the light breeze.

Molly!

No. It couldn't be. Not her Molly. Not here!

Without quite realizing what she was doing, Alex began to run toward the corner. She rounded it, only to see the girl going into an alleyway. What would she be doing there?

"Molly!" she called. Alex ran to the alley.

Dizziness swept over her and Alex wondered if there was a gas leak or something. And she was thirsty. So thirsty. Nauseous. What was wrong with her?

The girl was nowhere in the alleyway. But there was something there, at the end. An open doorway. Light streamed out of the opening. Alex found herself moving closer to it, without thought or reason.

Another wave of dizziness hit. Her head felt so heavy. What was wrong with her?

"Mum!"

Molly's voice!

"Mum! Come back to me. To us!"

Alex squinted in the light of the doorway. She tried to move forward, but her legs felt like lead. Every movement was incredibly hard. "Molly," she whispered.

"I love you, Mum. Please come back."

She was shaking, perspiring. Her coat was so heavy. Alex tried to take it off but gave up. She took another step. Leaning against the building, she tried to catch her breath. Even that was proving more and more difficult. "I'm coming, Molly," she whispered. "I'm trying…"

"Bolly!"

Gene's voice! Where was he? Alex saw him. Standing behind Molly.

"Come on, Bolls. You can come back to us."

"Mum. Please."

Alex took another step and then another. The door was so close. Just a few more steps…

##########

Gene opened his eyes. What woke him? It was too early to get up. But he was wide awake now. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he listened carefully, trying to figure out what had bothered him. But there was nothing except the usual morning noises of his neighbors.

He looked over at the empty side of the bed. Bolly. He missed waking up beside her. It was her birthday today. Gene had planned on giving her a pair of earrings. Peridot, to go with her eyes. And because it was his birthstone. A way to sort of claim her.

But he had no claim on her now.

Alex.

That's what woke him. He thought he'd heard her voice. He must have dreamed it.

So why was his gut telling him to check on her?

He grabbed the phone and dialed her number. No answer. He tried again ten minutes later. Still no answer. There was no answer at her desk phone, either. Now really worried, Gene quickly got dressed.

Twenty minutes later, he was at Alex's door. There was no answer. "Bolly!" he called. "It's me. Open up." Digging into his pocket, he got his key to the flat, glad that he'd not returned it to her. After all, he'd always had a key to the place, even before she arrived.

An icy feeling went up his spine as Gene opened the door. Somehow he knew, even before he entered, what he might find.

Alex was gone.

The flat was empty. The furniture was still there. But there was no sign of Alex anywhere. All that she'd added, those things that made it a home, weren't there. The cupboards in the kitchen were empty. The bookshelves were bare. Gene went from room to room, looking for something that belonged to Alex. But now, there was nothing that said, "Alex Drake lives here."

Finally, he went into the bedroom. It was the same. Nothing of hers was there.

Gene sat on the bed. The bed he had shared with her so many nights. No red sheets on it now. Just plain white cotton covered the mattress.

Nothing of Alex.

Except… he could still smell her perfume.

He didn't know how long he sat there, trying to figure it all. And it wasn't as though he hadn't expected it. He just hadn't thought it would be like this.

Slowly Gene got to his feet. What if know one else remembered her? Would he be the only one?

Walking back into the living room, something caught his eye. He looked above the little fireplace.

Molly's portrait was still there.

Gene took the picture down. He traced the outline of the child's face. As always, her eyes seemed to reach into him.

He turned and left the flat, taking the portrait with him.

##########

Gene entered Fenchurch East CID. Everyone was there – except Alex. But her name was still on the office door. He looked at the picture of Molly and took it into the office, placing it on the bookcase. As he came back out, Shaz called out to him.

"Guv! Superintendent Wilkins wants to see you right away."

"Right," he answered absently.

When he reached Wilkins's office, Gene didn't bother to knock. But then he really didn't have to. The door was wide open. Wilkins saw him and gestured him in. "Come in, Hunt," the Superintendent said.

An open box sat on the desk. It looked as though Wilkins was packing up. Gene did his best to suppress a smile.

"Go on and gloat," Wilkins grumbled, as if reading Gene's mind. "You and Drake have won. I've been reassigned to Central. Starting Monday Jeffers will be back here – for a while, at least."

As tempting as it was to do as Little Lord Denny said, Gene did his best to hide his happiness at the news. "Jeffers is a good man," he replied.

Wilkins snorted. "He's the only one who would take the job," he sneered. "No one else wants you. However..." Wilkins smirked at Gene. "You lose your partner in crime." Taking some papers from the top of his desk, the superintendent handed them over. "Drake's been transferred, effective immediately, to parts unknown. The paper's marked 'Classified.' And congratulations. You're DCI again. Not my decision. You do have a few friends in high places." He handed Gene a new warrant card. "Now if you'll allow me to get back to work…"

Gene took the papers and turned around to leave the office. But he couldn't resist one last comment. "Goodbye, Denny. Hope you get everything that's coming to you."

##########

Returning to CID, Gene nearly sat at the desk he'd used for the past few months. Strange how quickly habits were formed. He went into the office and placed the papers on the desk. Alex's desk. Shaz came to the door. "Guv, DCI Drake hasn't come in yet. It's near 9:00. Should we check on her?"

"No," he said. Going back out, he called for attention. As soon as everyone settled down, Gene took a breath and let it out slowly.

"DCI Drake has been transferred, effective immediately." He waited for the mumbling and buzzing to die down.

"Why?" Chris asked. "What happened?"

"She – she had a chance to be with her daughter again and took it." Might as well tell the truth.

Ray spoke up. "So where's she gone?"

"Can't say," Gene answered. "Papers say 'Classified.'"

"What? She's gone to the Spooks?" Ray laughed.

Gene scowled. "I told you, I can't say." Let 'em think she's done just that. That'd give Bolly a laugh. He was rewarded by uncomfortable looks from everyone. "One more bit of news," he added. "I'm your DCI again."

He could swear he heard the jaws drop. Then Chris stood and started clapping. Everyone else joined in. Gene held up a hand. "All right, all right. Let's get to work."

"You know," said Shaz, "it's too bad we couldn't give DCI Drake the party for her birthday. But if she can be with her daughter again – " Shaz put a hand protectively over her abdomen. "—I reckon it's worth it."

"That's right, Shaz," Gene agreed.

##########

'Cause maybe in the future you're gonna come back, you're gonna come back around.

Maybe in the future you're gonna come back, you're gonna come back.

Oh, the only way to really know is to really let it go.

Maybe in the future you're gonna come back,

You're gonna come back to me.

Gene kept busy for the rest of the day. The team wanted to change the planned birthday celebration to a congratulations for him. "Let's make it next week," he told them. "Make sure Lord Denny doesn't try to take it back!"

Most of the time, he was trying not to think of the empty flat about Luigi's. By evening, though, after everyone had left for the day, he was drawn to the place once more.

Nothing had changed since that morning. The beautiful, vibrant woman who'd lived there was now gone. But again Gene was certain that he could still smell her perfume. Everything else that had made this their sanctuary, a place where they could love each other, was gone.

Tears burned at his eyes. His Bolly was gone. And as much as he wanted to believe that he would find her again, right at this moment, it was nearly impossible.

He sat down on the sofa and leaned back, feeling the tears running down his face and not caring. Memories crashed down on him and pain raged through his chest.

Faith. Sam said he had to have faith. But twenty-five years was a long time to wait. Would he even live that long?

Gene sat up and wiped his face. Alex asked him to make a life for himself. But his life was with her. In the future.

He took out his cigarettes. Reaching into his other pocket for his lighter, he instead found the gold chain and anchor pendant. The necklace he'd taken from her the night before.

Twenty-five years.

Gene looked at the cigarettes in his other hand. He crushed the pack and tossed it onto the coffee table. "I'll have a better chance without you."

END