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Note: I realize it's been impossibly long since the last chapter, and I apologize! I have not had access to this account for a couple of years now and was finally able to get back in, and I wanted very much to update. So if anyone is still following, I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint! I apologize if my writing is not what it was (I haven't done much writing at all in quite a while). Please read and review! And if anyone is still following I will update again soon! Also - looking for a beta if anyone is interested :)
Chapter 18: Hell in a Hand Basket
I felt the cold polished wood of my new bedroom doors against my back, as I closed them behind me. No time had been wasted in having them replaced. The beautiful solid oak doors looked exactly like the ones that had been crushed a few nights prior in Caius' fit of rage.
My head was swimming, as my situation grew more and more convoluted by each passing day. I had thought it overwhelming enough when my life entailed surviving encounter to encounter with Caius. Now, I had this estranged affair with Caius, his brother who I had propositioned to give me a quick and merciful death, his wife who would be more than happy to carry out the actions herself, and his mistress, who wanted me dead but was more of an annoyance than anything else.
How on earth had I gotten myself to this point? I had to muffle a chuckle as I thought of so many around me who wanted me dead, yet here I was, still very much alive.
I finally heaved myself away from the doors and made my way into the bathroom. I drew myself the hottest bath I could stand, and lowered myself gently in. I inhaled the beautifully sweet scent of the lavender I had added to the water, in my attempt to find some relief from the utter chaos in my head. After a few moments I allowed myself to think about the note Caius had left for me. It bothered me that as I slept he had been there, in the room with me, to deposit the note. He obviously wished to address the words I had spoken the other night. I guessed he wanted to wound me further before he finally put an end to my misery. Or perhaps he had finally found a way to address my declaration...
I came out of my bath feeling pleasantly numb to my incredibly complicated situation. I finally felt warm, and I dried myself, and took my time getting the excess water from my hair before dressing.
I stood in front of my wardrobe contemplating what I was to wear. After all, how does one dress for such an occasion, as potentially their own death at the hands of their lover, or was he my former lover now? I couldn't allow myself to get hung up on the semantics of the situation. It felt like an eternity of indecisiveness before I finally selected a dress.
A little while later I evaluated myself in the mirror. I almost never wore this dress, but the grey chiffon hung so beautifully, as it cascaded from an empire waist and fell delicately to the floor. It was very Grecian in appearance, and though it did reveal a significant amount of my more than ample bosom, it was incredibly elegant. I loved the romanticism in it. I pulled my thick, loose curls over my left shoulder, to keep the other shoulder exposed, allowing the one beautifully beaded, ever so delicate strap of the dress visible.
By the time I had finished getting myself ready, the sun was just beginning to set over the city. I made my way out onto the balcony to enjoy the last bit of warmth. I felt oddly serene given my current predicament, as I sat on the wide stone railing and stared out over the rooftops. Volterra was so built up, all you could see surrounding the castle were clay tiled rooftops. But way off, in the distance, you could catch a glimpse of the luscious green rolling hills, which were so exquisitely bare. It would be so wonderful to be out there, walking barefoot through the grass, watching the sun go down, I thought to myself.
I realized, as the sun disappeared, and I started to feel cool, that I was losing myself in so many random thoughts, to avoid thinking of what might happen in the tower, in too few hours.
As I thought of how quickly that time would be upon me, I felt a wave of unease roll through me. My stomach lurched and I slid down from the railing and made my way back inside. But I was too restless to sit in my room and wait, so I slid from my darkening bedroom into the corridor and sauntered aimlessly through the halls.
I let my mind wander as well. I recalled Athenodora's offer and wondered how long she had desperately waited to be able to make it. I so rarely thought of her, or Sulpicia, yet I supposed how I felt about Chloe was similar to how Athenodora thought about me. The two wives retained their own private chambers, and were almost never seen with their husbands. I guess centuries of marriage allow for a certain indifference to your spouse and their lovers. It made me sad to think how at one point in time Athenodora probably felt for Caius the way I did. But as I recalled her vacant, glossy eyes, I thought perhaps she had never really loved him, or for that matter, anyone except herself. Neither of the wives seemed particularly attached to their husband; they spent most of their time together, and floated through the castle, almost ghostly, yet impossibly beautiful; wispy figures, you might only catch a fleeting glimpse of.
As I brought myself back to reality, I realized I had wandered to one of the far edges of the castle and stood in front of a very rough wooden door. The wood looked sturdy, but obviously had not been meant to be beautiful, but rather practical. The rough wood was framed by black wrought iron grill. This was an exterior door, and if I was where I thought I was, it would lead outside to a large courtyard and garden. Such a door I would have thought to be locked, but as I tested it, it creaked stiffly open. I slid outside into the darkened courtyard. The night air was growing cooler , and the moonlight danced on the marble statues that sat around the perimeter. I kept to the shadows, and slowly made my way around the courtyard to the entrance to the garden. The garden had many trees and hedges, and was very dark now, as the canopy of the trees blocked out the moonlight. In the far corner of the garden, there was a fountain, small and whimsical, and I loved the sound of the gently falling water. I sat there for a while, enjoying being outside the castle walls, which I wondered why I didn't do more often.
There was a very adamant side of me that didn't want to make my way up to the tower. But I also knew to ignore Caius' note was to terminate any semblance of our relationship, if you could call it that. I wondered what sort of repercussions there would be, for simply not meeting him and opting to avoid any confrontation. Would he kill me? Or would we carry on, knowing that I had chosen to not allow for any sort of resolution. Would I then have to witness as he carried on with Chloe? Though who knew how much time she had left either, especially after I had so blatantly revealed our last encounter to Caius.
I could make out soft footfalls in the grass behind me. Whoever was approaching wanted me to be aware of them, and not catch me by surprise. Vampires can be perfectly silent if they wish to be, so this gesture was oddly considerate. Marcus.
He moved slowly, leisurely, and sat next to me, allowing himself to watch the water fall in the fountain as well. He said nothing for a while. The silence was wonderful, and so welcome.
Marcus was often there for me in times of emotional upheaval. He was the only brother with any sort of compassion left. He was also the only one who didn't think about ripping my throat out, or using me for his personal pleasure, which made his company so revered.
"How have I gotten into such a mess?" the question was more rhetorical, then anything else, the events that had gotten me here were all too clear to me. It didn't matter that I had barely whispered the words, he had heard them. But I felt safe enough to say them aloud, and Marcus sat there comfortably silent for a while still. I finally turned to look at him, he was still watching the moonlight dance off the water of the fountain. They didn't leave the fountain even when he finally spoke.
"We both know this isn't the first time Lyana. You do seem to have an incredible affinity for getting yourself out of a situation like this." I thought I could see the faintest hint of a smile move across his lips, which was so rare, and I couldn't stop the smile from spreading across my own. "I think you do forget how long you have survived here. I can attest that you are the only human that has ever been able to do so."
I had never thought about the fact that I witnessed so many humans come into the castle, and none of them ever left, not alive at least. I turned by gaze back to the fountain, almost dumbfounded.
"I suppose I figured that each day brings the possibility that he will kill me." I whispered breathlessly.
"It does." he replied, so matter-of-factly. "But I think at this point, you may have earned yourself more time then you know."
I turned to look at him again. My eyes asked the question my voice need not. There were no mind games with Marcus. He had no sinister objective, no ability to read my mind. Every exchange, not that they happened often, but they were honest. He didn't toy with me; he knew I needed more clarification, and he would give it.
"If Caius wanted you dead, you would be. We both know he isn't one to wait for something he wants. And you asked Aro to kill you, and yet here you are. Even he would not claim your life. Athenodora knows that she cannot unless you were to ask it of her, and even then she fears the consequences. Surely all of this must mean that you are not so disposable as you think." He held my gaze as he spoke. Though they were the same crimson shade as all the others, his had a softness to them, a warmth. "Now, I suggest you make your way to the tower. Even I would not wish to keep Caius waiting."
I hadn't noticed the moon rising in the sky, and I cursed under my breath as I flew back through the dimly lit halls of the castle and I made my way towards the tower. When I reached the bottom of the tower stairs I paused. I needed to catch my breath, and to try to calm my mind, though I knew that would be in vain. But I kept going over my conversation with Marcus again and again in my mind. He had come to give me hope for a reason, at least that was what I needed to tell myself to force myself to ascend those steps.
Caius and I didn't often meet in the tower anymore. It was a lonely, desolate part of the castle. Which was odd as it was so full of light during the daytime hours. At night, it was illuminated by moonlight, but it was so far removed from everything and everyone. That was surely his reason for choosing this place to meet.
I emerged into the room at the top of the tower. Moonlight shone in through the tall but narrow windows, which were little more than gaps in the stone work. It gleamed against his glossy hair as he stood, his back to me, gazing out over a darkened Volterra. My breath caught in my chest, which was heaving after climbing all those stairs. I had hoped I would have been there first, so I would have a moment to catch my breath, but I had no such luck.
Not only would I not have a moment to catch my breath and gather my thoughts, but it looked like my meeting with Caius had been hijacked.
It was Aro who awaited me in the tower. The moonlight gleamed against his dark raven hair, and it was his sinister red eyes that met mine as he turned to face me.
"I'm so sorry my dear, were you expecting someone else?" he taunted with his usual feigned sincerity.
"What are you doing here?" I hissed. My blood boiling. Now I wasn't sure if the note had been left by Caius, or perhaps it had been Aro all along; eager to learn of my decision about his offer. In my anger I turned on heel to flee back down the tower steps and try to find the sanctuary of my bedroom. Alas, avoiding the situation would not be so easy. I felt the breath pushed from my body as it was forced against the stone wall, perilously close to the steps that spiraled downwards out of sight in the darkness.
"You can't run from me my darling Lyana. I would think you would at least have surmised that much in your time here." His eyes looked black and glassy as they glittered down at me. His face was so close to my own, I couldn't even turn it from him. Aro's eyes lustfully studied my face, and his fingertips traced the length of my neck. I could see the thirst in him, he was battling it but I feared it would win out . "I wonder how he has managed for so long." his voice was low and I could hear the turmoil in it. "Even the other night I wasn't sure I could restrain myself. Had my brother not arrived so soon, I may not have been able to abstain."
I knew in that instant I had to act with haste and divert his attention. If I couldn't make him see me as anything more than my blood, I would be destroyed there in that tower. It seemed I had run out of time to contemplate his offer any further.
I reached up quickly, grasping his shoulders and pulling myself into him; his lips cold and hard against my own. There was not even the slightest hesitation on his part, before his tongue found mine. His arms, which had been pressing me against the wall were now like iron vices pulling me against him. I felt dizzy as I both burned and froze in his embrace. Or perhaps I felt dizzy as our kissing became frenzied, and breathing was no longer the priority.
Caius never did come to the tower that night. Either he knew Aro had beaten him there and did not wish to bear witness to our encounter again. Or perhaps he had never intended to meet me, and the note had been orchestrated by Aro all along. But then, why would Marcus know of the meeting? I wouldn't find any answers that night. I would only leave the tower, as the sun threatened to peak over the horizon, and return to my room in a daze. My lips felt sore and swollen from Aro's assault on them. My legs still weak at the knees, as my mind begged to forget the nights events, if only for a few hours, to sleep. But I knew the sleep would be troubled, and I would wake with so many more questions than ever before, and the looming guilt of having sold my soul to the devil for safe passage.