Hi!! Yeah, I'm not dead...but this summer I didn't really spend time at my computer because my friends kept dragging me out the house, 'cause they wanted to go to the park, and to the cinema, and to each other's houses and so on...all summer, ...I enjoyed it actually...

Anyway, even though I should probably continue my work on 'Camp Konoha', I thought about a funny thing that should happen to Suigetsu if someone teased him while he is drinking his water... with a straw of course...Even so...I decided that it should happen to Naruto.

So here it is, my first naruhina, it will probably be a two shot.

Chap. one: 'Talk to the straw'

Hi ya' guys! You probably know me since, c'mon, I'm the hero and all, but I'll introduce myself anyway. I'm Uzumaki Naruto, future Hokage , 'tebbayo!!

Though, I probably changed a bit since you last saw me. My hair managed to somehow become somewhat spikier, I'm taller, stronger, and even more skillful and –if that's possible- more charming and a wild love machine, might I add! I'm nineteen years old now and during this time a lot of things happened.

First off, I and Sasuke almost killed Madara...almost!! But!, the fucking freak got away!! After that, after the coward ran away, we both collapsed. We were in a pretty bad condition- well, not me, Sasuke-teme mostly; I was almost unscratched, just some broken ribs, and a broken leg (which looked really cool, I could see my bone!!) and some internal damage and some fucked up organs which I didn't know I had. Nothing serious, just a month of coma or so! On the other hand, Sasuke almost lost his eyesight. He really over used that Magen- uh, Magenko-or kyo or...that special Sharingan Itachi gave him!

But no worries, he's far from being blind, because Sakura-chan figured out a treatment for his eyes. In just two months! She really is the best medic nin ever, she literarily surpassed Tsunade-baachan. She didn't close an eye in that 2 months though, she kept taking soldier pills and coffee. She slept three days after she was done.

But going back to the treatment, you cloud call Sakura Sasuke's personal medic right now 'cause the technique she created for said treatment needs a perfect chakra control and perfect concentration and some other stuff like that. It's too complicated for even Tsunade-baachan.

You know, by now you'd expect me to talk about how amazing, beautiful, smart and strong she has gotten but...*sigh* the truth is I can't do it the same way as I did it before, my feelings changed I guess.

But moving on, you know team Taka: Karin, Suigetsu and Juugo?! Yeah, well they are allowed to stay in Konoha and are now official shinobi, they are sent on missions.

Karin's working with the Anbu's special branch specialized in capturing bingo book ninja's. She is a chakra sensor after all and has that strange medical ability- healing people by letting them suck her chakra, was it? Freaky...

Well, despite her skill, she's a bitch, always being mean to Sakura-chan (because she's closer to teme then she is) and arguing with Ino and most of all SHE DARED INSULT HINATA-CHAN, AND NOT JUST ONCE, TWICE!! TWICE!! Fucking bitch!

Moving on to Suigetsu, he's a great fellow, a little scary, he helps Ibiki with interrogations. Man, now you should see when we hang out together, its madness! And if Kiba joins in, hell unlashes!

As for Juugo, he's a cool guy and a great listener! Since Sakura-chan and Tsunade-baachan managed to make him control his killing impulses (god knows how!) he decided not to take missions, but help at an animal shop. Even so, he helps the research team, gathering info from different animals, but that's only for urgent situations.

Relations formed as well! Sai learned more about human feelings from Ino, maybe got info on other stuff as well. Shikamaru and Termari are holding tightly to their at distance relationship, Neji and Ten-ten are engaged, though they don't talk about wedding stuff, their still waiting for some reason.

Kiba found a really sweet and nice girl; I really like how she always speaks her mind without offending others.

Chouji too, and she's quite a rarity, with purple eyes and childish nature.

Heck!, even fuzzy brows got a girl! And what do I have?! Nothing! No girl, no lady or as Sasuke tells me: no-

"No balls, dobe, no balls.", teme told me. I was at the park with Suigestu, Sasuke, Sai, Shikamaru and Kiba, drinking the drinks we got from a fast-food near by. The scary part was that I agreed with him.

"Oh, shut up teme! What about you, huh? You're in the same situation! You know Sakura still likes- no! - loves you and you ain't doing anything about it! And don't give us the same excuse: 'her older brother is my anbu captain, taichou would kill me if I asked her out or something like that.'.", I defended myself. Just because I agree with him that doesn't mean I'll say it out loud.

Sauke just frowned and turned his head away, drinking his coke. In a way I felt guilty. After all, I was the only one who knew his real reason for not asking her out. Not that he knew that I knew, he was drunk when he told me.

*Flashback *

I was dragging a not-so-sober Sasuke-teme home. Never thought he'll take my dare to beat Tsunade-baachan's record at drinking sake; four bottles to be more exact. It was a miracle he was still awake. Even so, something wasn't alright. People are usually all giddy and giggling when they're drunk (at least the drunks I saw up until now are). Throwing another glance at Sasuke I saw he was sad, depressed and in deep thought. So, I tried my luck.

"Oi, Sasuke-teme? What's bothering you?", as asked and he looked up at me, looking a little dizzy.

"As usual, thinking about Sakura, hic.", he ended his sentence with a hiccup, covering his mouth with his hand. Yep, he wasn't a usual drunk.

"Y'know, I really like her, I like her a lot but...it wouldn't be fair for her.", he continued talking.

"Why?", I couldn't help but to feel confused. He liked her; she liked him, what was the problem?

"I already broke her heart; if I start dating her I'll ruin her reputation as well. Let's be serious, Konoha's best medic-nin going out with a former traitor and S-rank criminal.", he said in a demoralizing tone which was accompanied by a sarcastic, ironic but pained and defamatory snort. After that followed another series of hiccups.

I was about to say something, but I didn't have the time. Sasuke clumsily ran over to a bush, throwing up the third bottle of sake.

*End of flashback*

I sighed at the memory.*snap* I really had to talk to him and Sakura about this. *snap**snap*.

"Huh?", I woke up from my trance as I heard Suigestu snapping his fingers in front of me.

"You back from dreamland, buddy?", he asked with a familiar grin. I retuned the smile and nodded.

"Returning to the subject: when are you going to ask Hinata out?", Shikamaru muttered. He just couldn't let me change the subject, could he?!

"Whe-", I was interrupted from my justifications.

"When I'm good and ready, that's when!", the guys mimicked my voice and my excuse in perfect sync. Sai gave me his still fake-looking smile.

"You really need to do something about it dickless! I could borrow you a few books about that if you want to.", he said it all as if he didn't even know how offended I felt. I can ask her out any time I want to, it's just that...um...I'm scared of Neji? If only, it's better than being to afraid to ask. I mean she's been in love with me for such a long time, what if I ask her on a date and then I did something stupid? It could make her lose interest in me, or make her feel disappointed that she wasted so many years in loving me! Or worse-ouch!! I felt a hard bonk on my head. Looking up I was Kiba and Sasuke looking down at me with weird faces.

"What for that for, DATTEBAYO?!!", I yelled at them.

"You were thinking out loud, dobe.", Sasuke explained to me with his emotionless facade back on his pale face. My face reddened a little. I 'hmpt' and went back to drinking my Sprite, to prevent myself from saying other embarrassing stuff.

"Talk to the straw", I said before starting to blow air through my straw into the bubbleish liquid.

"Ano, o-ohayo guys...", a sweet, beautiful, sunny, soft, silent, angelic voice came from behind me. I recognized it immediately, and I must say that it startled me. Milliseconds after she finished her words I blew a big and fast amount of air in my drink. It seemed that taking the lid off and throwing it away wasn't a good idea, because the juice jumped all over my face and clothes. Can you say embarrassing? A perfect gasp passed Hinata's perfect, pink, full lips. In an instant a packet of paper napkins appeared in her pale, slender hand. I gratefully took them. The guys were done laughing by now, and they all invented a reason to leave, each and every reason being related to their girlfriends.

Lucky I, Sasuke stayed. I'm saved, I really don't know what I would do if I was left alone with her right now.

"Um, S-Sasuke-san, Ino-chan said that she saw Sakura-chan on a bench near Konoha's gate. She asked m-me to tell you that Sakura-chan has been looking for you all morning. Apparently she'll b-be on a mission next week du-during your birthday and she wanted to give you the present t-today.", she explained.

"Okay", he replied silently, almost worried. With that said he disappeared in a poof of smoke. Crap, I'm alone with her.

"Soooo… Lovely weather today, huh?", I tried starting a conversation. Turning her face to stare at the blue, summer sky she responded:

"Yes, it is.", while her attention was turned to the cloudless arch above us, I punched my head. 'Lovely weather'? C'mon Uzumaki, you can do better!

"Hi-hinata-chan!", I called out for her. Shit, did I stutter?

"H-hai. Naruto-kun?", as she looked at me the ever-present blush of her cheeks deepened. I was certain that my tanned face was also bright red right now. I stared at the ground, mentally encouraging myself.

"Are you free at the very moment, 'cause it's about noon and I thought we could go eat ramen together!", I blurred out, but realized a mistake. "No, sorry, not to the ramen shop, you don't invite a girl there; you let her decide the place. Um…like the dango shop or some place where they serve cinnamon rolls, I know you like them.", I quickly corrected.

"N-no, the ramen shop is fine! I-I would love to take lunch with you!", she smiled at me kindly, looking happy but quite nervous. She then gasped and her expression changed to worry.

"But I forgot my wallet at home. Oh…", she seemed upset and so was I. She did realize I was asking her out, right? I'm the man, I'm the one who pays, right?

"It's my treat, don't worry about it!"

"Oh, no, I couldn't-", she tried excusing herself, but I cut her off.

"It's alright, really!.", and then it hit me. Was she just trying to be polite? "Of course, I'm not forcing you. If you don't want to go with me, I understand.", maybe I've waited to long to make a move.

"Ah, no, no! T-that's not it! Um, w-well, if you insist, but I'll have to pay you back afterwards.", she said as she pointed her fingers together, looking like an innocent and overjoyed angel. I grinned. Finally, my balls grew back in place!