Disclaimer: I clearly do not own anything within...props to Disney and such.
A/N: Last Sunday I spent the afternoon watching movies with my mom and I convinced her to add 'Camp Rock' to the lineup (only because she said no more JONAS and I wanted to punish her (and apparently myself) for all the chick flicks) and we ended up talking about the "differences" of the 3 characters in the movie and the show and how much they do vary from their real selves. So this fic started all meta like and Kevin Lucas finding out about 'Camp Rock' but as I started to flesh the idea out it turned into this.
Also, I SOO want to get an entry in for Suburbs PureHoraceMantis Challenge but I just can't make myself sit down and write...stuff like this happens instead. :(
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"I am scandalous!" Kevin declared.
No one really paid his declaration much mind. Nick continued with whatever he was scribbling away in his notebook and Joe didn't look up from his magazine.
"Scandalous. I, Kevin Lucas!"
Joe sighed as he finally looked up from his magazine. "We heard you the first time, Kev. And no, you aren't. You couldn't be scandalous if you tried. And even if you did try...still nope."
"Hey! I could too! And I am! Look at this," Kevin said as he pulled a DVD from his messenger bag. "Someone made a movie and totally put us into it! I know I didn't sign anything by accident this time. Not since that nose hair trimmer sponsorship in Tokyo last year." Kevin scratched at his nose as a phantom tingle ran up his nostril.
Nick paused his writing and glanced up briefly. "You're not 'scandalous', Kevin. Wrong context. You can, though, be scandalized by this. What's this movie called?"
Joe stared at the DVD cover art with a funny look on his face. "'Camp Rock'. Where did you get this and why have I not heard about this before?" Joe asked, heading towards their DVD player.
"I got it from Macy's room and I have no idea! This is the first time I've ever h--"
"Wait, what?"
Kevin huffed. "Well, don't interrupt me, Nick. I was going to say--"
"No, no, no. Macy's room?" Nick asked. "You were in Macy's bedroom?"
Joe stood a few feet away from the projection screen and was momentarily sidetracked trying to start the movie. "Well, I stand corrected. You can totally be scandalous, Kevin. You sly dog, you."
"Guys! Someone took our, y'know, the way we--"
"Our likeness," Nick supplied.
Kevin snapped his finger. "Yeah, that and turned us into characters in this movie and hired people to play us."
"That is awesome!" Joe exclaimed, finally getting the DVD player on.
Nick though was still a little hung up by how Kevin had come across this movie. "You and Macy were alone in her bedroom?!"
"No. I was there by myself."
"Y'know, that's almost worse." Nick finally gave up on the pretext of doing his homework and moved away from his desk. "Why were you even there in the first place? Where was Macy?"
"Me and Macy were just going to hang out," Kevin said defensively when he noticed Nick eyeing him. "Macy and I hang out at times, it's something we do. Sometimes, y'know? With no one around. So I went over after school today but she got called in last minute by her coach because someone got hurt and they needed to redo stuff. I didn't know this of course but Mrs. Misa said I could just wait at the house til Macy got back. So then I saw the movie and I was all 'hey that guy on the cover looks like Joe' and I was bored so I put it on and then it started playing and Joe came on and then later we came on and I do not sound like that! Also there was way more Joe than me and I'm the oldest. There was even way more Joe than y--"
"Kevin," Nick tried again, "You, hanging out with Macy but not telling anyone, going to her house, her mother letting you wait in her bedroom, pawing through her things. Any of this ringing a bell?"
"The movie makes me sound like I'm obsessed with birdhouses," Kevin said, crossing his arms.
"You love birdhouses."
"No, I love the birds that birdhouses bring to the yard. That is totally--"
Nick frowned, "Didn't Macy make you one earlier this year? You said it was the best gift from a fan you'd gotten in--"
Kevin let out a scandalized gasp. "That's why Macy built me that birdhouse! I can't believe it!"
"Why have we never heard about this?!" Joe asked again as the opening for 'Camp Rock' started.
"Joe, so not important right now. Kevin was in Macy's bedroom, alone, and he stole one of her movies."
"Nick! This is important!" Kevin stressed, motioning towards the screen. "Also, I borrowed it...without her consent. That's totally different than stealing! Oh and Joe, it's this Canadian movie that went like straight to DVD. We should sue somebody!"
"Ohmigod!" Joe flailed, pointing at the screen. "It's the me character! I'm named Shane! He totally looks like me! But obviously not as hot."
Nick craned his neck and peered around to the front side of the projection screen just barely getting a glimpse of 'Joe' in a still shot. "I wonder why Macy never mentioned this to us. Did you ask her about it, Kevin?"
"Well, I kinda forgot about the movie by the time Macy showed up," Kevin admitted, glancing towards the floor and starting to fidget.
"Forget about this movie?!" Joe said, staring in awed, horror at their projection screen. "They called me clueless!"
Kevin continued to fiddle with his bracelet and shoot glances at Nick. "I started looking around Macy's room. The JONAS stuff is very subtle. And then I spotted Macy's hamper and I started to think about what Stella was talking about that time she went to Macy's fanclub meeting and -- did you know that our fans like to smell our clothes?"
Nick sighed. "Yeah, I was aware. Kevin, what did you do?" Nick finally asked, fully realizing how very fidgety Kevin was.
Kevin took the few steps back to where he'd dropped his messenger bag and reached back in to pull out a purple shirt. "I took Macy's shirt."
"Kevin!"
"I didn't mean to!" But even as Kevin was denying it he was bringing it up to his face to inhale deeply. "Our fans are so right! It smells amazing, just like Macy."
"You didn't mean to?!"
"No! I saw it a-and had to just see! I was curious! So I picked it up and did you know that if you smell it near the collar you can get a faint hint of Macy's shampoo, too? But I was holding it and thinking I should really probably put it back into her hamper when I heard her at the door. I panicked! So I just shoved it all into my bag."
"You stole her shirt and her movie."
"I--I'll give them back! I just got distracted by someone stealing our souls and putting us into a movie without our consent!"
"Boring, boring, boring," Joe muttered hitting the skip button.
Nick rolled his eyes and wondered how Joe was missing out on this conversation. Nick fully planned to never let Kevin live this incident down. Ever.
"AH HAHAHA! Look, look, it's me again! And you two! Bros, this is awesome! They straightened your hair, Kevin! Nick actor guy looks 13!"
Well, color Nick curious. He finally made his way to get a better view of the movie and made a grab to drag Kevin with him. Except when he went to yank Kevin's sleeve he caught Macy's shirt instead and stretching the purple fabric dislodged something that had been, unknowingly, caught within it.
"Holy crap, is that a bra?!"
"He picks now to pay attention," Kevin mutters, ignoring Joe's outburst as he stared down at the pale pink frilly thing in horror. "Nick, what do I do?!"
"How am I supposed to know? I'll stalk girls but I don't steal their clothes and undergarments!"
"What do I do?! What do I do?!" Kevin asked, wringing Macy's shirt in his hands. "I stole Macy's...Macy's... I accidentally stole her," Kevin finally managed to squeak out, "bra!"
"Hey guys, I just found this cool talkshow in Italy that would--"
"Dad!" Kevin hissed, Macy's purple shirt clutched to his chest. Kevin spun around the room frantically before just tossing the shirt into his bunk. A huge sigh of relief was let out before Kevin noticed Nick's pointed look. Macy's bra was still on the floor!
"--teleconference sound good next Sunday?"
"Nick, what do I do?!"
"This is so your own fault! You figure it out, superstar!" Nick had to admit he was curious to see what Kevin was going to do and as well as he knew his older brother he was beyond shocked at the route Kevin went.
Kevin picked Macy's bra up and shoved it down his pants.
Joe's loud guffaws finally brought Nick out of his stupor. Between Joe nearly bent in half with tears streaming down his cheeks and Kevin who'd gone a deathly shade of white and was sweating like he'd run a marathon, Nick let out a chuckle that slowly turned into shocked laughter.
"What's so funny, boys?" Tom asked as he entered the room and noticed both Joe and Nick laughing and Kevin, who'd finally overcome panic, looking rather red in the face.
"What?! Nothing!" Kevin blurted out. "I have done nothing to garner any sort of reaction. Hey, what's this movie playing? Ha, ha! Look at the crazy shenanigans of the fake JONAS band."
Tom studied Kevin for a moment before shaking his head and not bothering. Turning, he looked up at the screen. "Whatcha kids watching?"
Joe, who'd calmed enough to sit while letting the occasional giggle out, tossed the DVD case his dad's way. "Kevin found this movie that has characters that are us. Kevin--"
"Sue!" Kevin said, glad to finally be back on the original topic. He shifted about uncomfortably but restrained from grabbing at his pants. "I'm pretty sure this is against the law or something."
"Watch," Joe said, reaching over to hit Tom's shoulder. "The guy who's totally me but not as awesome will show up soon."
Tom laughed at fake!Joe's antics. "It's like they know you!"
"Dad!"
"Right, I'll get a guy on this right way, Kevin," Tom said, pulling his phone out. He sent a quick message out before looking back up at the screen again. "Ha, look at fake!Joe dancing." Tom suddenly leaned over to Joe and dropped his voice, "Which one of you told Kevin to stuff his pants again? He's doing it all wrong."
xoxoxoxoxoxoxox
To say Kevin was looking shifty in the school hall bright and early Thursday morning would be a huge understatement. He had carefully packed away Macy's things into his school bag because the prospect of what would happen if the things were found in his room were too horrifying to even think about.
He still wasn't sure what to do. The easy solution would be to throw the articles out and hope Macy would never make a fuss when realizing her missing things...or maybe toss the things into his own closet for safe keeping. He'd debated shoving the things into Macy's locker but he really wasn't sure how Macy would take finding her bra randomly in her locker. The most logical action seemed to be getting another invite to Macy's house tonight and just dumping the things right back where he'd found them in the first place.
But that meant talking to Macy and Kevin wasn't sure if he could talk to her just yet. Her bra was in his bag! He'd made an embarrassing squeaking noise in the parking lot when he first spotted her this morning and he didn't even want to know what would come out of his mouth if he actually came face to face with her.
Kevin stealthy poked his head around the corner and, sure enough, Macy was at her locker. So much for breaking in and ditching the stuff. Things were so much easier back when they were simply band member and super fa--
"Hey, Kevin!"
Kevin meeped in shock as Stella suddenly appeared behind him and looped an arm around his shoulder and started towards Macy. Joe walked at her side with an evil smile.
"Hey, Macy," Stella said, greeting her friend. "Why so glum this morning?
"I couldn't find my lucky bra--ah," Macy's eyes widened considerably as she suddenly realized Stella was not alone and desperately searched for something to say. "Bradminton! My lucky bradminton racket. I cannot find it."
"That's horrible, Macy!" Kevin was momentarily distracted by his embarrassment of having Macy's bra in his bag. Macy was missing something and Kevin was pretty good at finding things. "I can help. Do you know where you had it last? I've never heard of bradminton before, is it much like badminton?"
Stella took pity on Macy if only because the little athlete looked near to passing out. "The 'bradminton racket' that's light pink and frilly?"
"Yeah, I only wear," Macy stumbled over the word as she glanced at Kevin, "use it on special occasions."
Joe tugged Kevin in close and lowered his voice, "Bro, you totally stole Macy's lucky bra!"
"Wha -- oh. Oh. Oh, no!"
The warning bell for the next class suddenly rung. Macy heaved a sigh before turning back to her locker and gathering her stuff up for class.
Kevin pulled a face as his three friends turned to leave. His bag, containing Macy's 'borrowed' things, suddenly felt heavier than a hippo. "Macy, wait," Kevin said, reaching out to stop her. Stella and Joe paused as well before Kevin motioned them to leave. "I, uhm... Well, see... By accident..."
"Kevin? No offense but class is going to start soon and--"
"You like me, right?" Kevin rushed out the question.
Macy just blinked up at him. "Of course, Kevin. Why would you even ask?"
"Well, yesterday..." Kevin trailed off as he finally gave up and simply dug the items out of his bag.
"Hey, that's my--!" Macy's cheeks flushed darkly when she spotted what was on top of her shirt. "Kevin that's my, uhm, stuff."
"Y-yeah, last night. By accident. I was hoping you'd never find out but you have your game tonight and...and I know how important lucky charms are to you and I couldn't see you go through that again." Kevin bit his lip and looked down. "Macy, I am so sorry. I don't...I don't know what exactly happened but it did."
Macy was silent for a long moment before she dug down to the bottom of her bag. She gave one long, deep sigh before pulling out a single beige leather glove. "T-this is the glove you were wearing last year when you wrapped an arm around my waist to stop me from slipping on the ice. It was the first time you ever intentionally touched me and it was done to help me. So I, uh, broke into your locker later that day and stole it."
Kevin knew that it wasn't the right moment but he couldn't help the small smile. "You can keep it."
"Kev--"
"I'm serious, Macy. I, obviously, don't need it any more and it clearly has sentimental value to you." Kevin frowned when he noticed Macy looked close to tears. "We can make a tr-trade. You keep the glove and I'll keep your shirt." When Kevin saw Macy's skeptical look, he took a deep breath and tacked on, "It has sentimental value to me. It still smells like our first date."
"Ok, deal," Macy consented and tucked the glove back into the bottom of her bag. "Though, I-I'd like my bra back," Macy said quietly, glancing furtively around the hall as she stuffed her lucky bra into her gym bag.
"Oh, this too."
Macy blinked down at the DVD and let out a nervous laugh. "Oh, ha, you, uhm, saw that huh?"
"Yeah, it's interesting."
"Oh man, your brothers haven't seen it, right?"
"Um, no," Kevin said, his reply coming out as more of a question. Kevin paused by the door to Macy's English class.
"Oh whatever. I--I guess I should go in now," Macy said, looking into her class that was already in progress. "I guess having Joe star in a movie is the least of your problems. Even if he didn't know about it."
"I'm still invited to your game tonight, right?" Kevin asked. He let out a sigh of relief when Macy nodded. "And are we still on for dinner afterwards?"
"Of course, if you still want to."
"Of course.
"Of course..." Macy gave a nervous laugh. "I should really go. Th-thanks for giving me my stuff back."
"Thanks for thinking I wasn't a creep for taking them in the first place."
"Kevin, you're talking to Macy Misa."
Kevin laughed. "Right...of course. I should really be going because...because class is already started and, uh, stuff. I'll see you at your game. Or I guess at lunch first, technically. Well, maybe I'll see you between class instead or, oh, ok, you're heading into class already and I'm just talking to myself. Right." Kevin turned and made his way to the stairs.
Dating a former stalker apparently had its advantages.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxox
"Hello there, Frankie."
"Hey Nick."
Nick sat across from Frankie and pulled out the freshly delivered-by-FedEx copy of 'Camp Rock'. Frankie was good, there was only the slightest twitch in his left eye. "Kevin and Joe seem sincere in their denial of consenting to this. And while dad's done some weird things in the name of the band, he had nothing to do with this. But I remembered quite suddenly that ice cream truck you bought last year that no one knew how you paid for. And, really? This has you written all over it." Nick had expected to needle Frankie a little longer but his little brother nodded and shrugged his shoulders.
"I signed as Mr. F. Lucas and before they realized there's no 'F' involved in your band they'd handed over the check and started filming. It got a very limited release so my cut of the royalties suck."
"So you just got in contact with these people and decided to shove Joe into a movie?"
"Remember last year when mom set up those play dates for me with that girl, Cassie, down the street? And Joe started calling her my girlfriend and was being all mean about it forever? I was mad at Joe so when the writers of the movie came around it sounded like a good way to get back at Joe."
Nick should have thought to ask a few more questions. Especially considering that he himself, just three months prior, had teased Frankie relentlessly for a week straight about a little Abigail Williams who had developed a crush on Frankie.
They'd all find out eventually when Macy showed up on their doorstep one night in the near future with an unopened package from Amazon and a few bags of popcorn.
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Fin
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A/N: Uh, yeah...yeah...I know...'random' is putting it nice...
Happy Thanksgiving to all fellow Canadians out there! I'm currently turkey-ied out on the couch watching my hometown team get creamed...