A/N: I can never get tired of torturing the Sixth Division. Heh, my apologies, Renji.

One peaceful morning outside the Sixth Division…

"Sorry for coming in late!"

"What's wrong?"

"Well, I went to get my hair cut, but the salon was rather crowded, so… Your hair is always cut perfectly. Do you do that, after all? Do you belong to some exclusive place…?"

"No. I use Senbonzakura to cut my hair."

"HUH?!"

"It was a joke."

"Oh. HEY, YOU JUST MADE A JOKE?!"

Byakuya silently hoped that Renji wasn't about to have another heart attack- it was probably a vain hope, but it would be terribly troubling to find a new vice-captain at this time of year. "Calm yourself, Abarai. Is it not normal for others to share amusing notions with each other?"

"B-b-but you can't tell jokes! You're YOU! You're Captain Kuchiki! It's against the laws of nature!"

Byakuya cocked an eyebrow and let his face split into the tiniest of smiles. This was most amusing. Renji didn't seem to think so.

"GOD HELP ME! THE END OF THE WORLD IS UPON US! TAKE SHELTER! HUG YOUR CHILDREN! THE ETERNAL BALANCE OF THE UNIVERSE IS DESTROYED!"

Maybe Byakuya should stop pulling these things on his lieutenant. He only intended to keep that idiot on his toes, but it didn't seem to be having a good effect. Renji was foaming at the mouth. It was at that moment that Rukia decided to walk in.

"Ni-sama…" She spared a look at her childhood friend sprawled across the floor and then asked quietly, "Shall I call the Fourth Division?"

"No, Rukia, I'll do it. Please hand me your Soul Pager." She gave it to him. The next words out of Byakuya's mouth were words that Rukia never let Renji live down: "Captain Byakuya Kuchiki calling for medical assistance from Fourth Division. Lieutenant Abarai seems to have suffered a stroke."

A/N: I know Renji is kind of OOC, but hey, telling jokes is OOC for Byakuya, so it's all good, right? Please review!