A/N: David Rubenstein is based on the likeness of actor Michael Weston.

Warm soft lips danced across the skin of her shoulder and neck as his stubble covered face nuzzled against her. His arms were around her, squeezing her naked body against his beneath the warm, plush bedding. She rolled over and they kissed one another fully, passion riding on their tongues as they danced together.

Harleen was never as happy as when she lay with David, wrapped in his arms while his eyelids crinkled in a smile over his blue irises. She ran her fingers through his short brown hair and lost herself in his kiss again.

Love was what she called it. Through the years she had known him, she had been in love with him as he was with her. It was a beautiful feeling, encompassed within his heat while his heart beat against her, his whispered words against the tender skin of her ear. She had always wanted this.

He got up and disappeared through the bathroom door and she heard the shower turn on. Harleen pouted to herself and then tossed back the covers and joined him in the bathroom. She saw his silhouette against the curtain, illuminated by the light above and she scanned her tiled bathroom wall, her gaze settling on the gold ring beside the bathroom sink.

Temptation crept inside her and her pulse quickened at the thought of the ring disappearing into the drain. She touched it with her index finger, tracing the metal with her fingertip.

The end of the morning was the time she loathed most in her otherwise happy life. He would dress and kiss her goodbye leaving her to herself while he set off on a breakfast meeting with a client.

Harleen would similarly dress and head off to Arkham Asylum for her breakfast meeting with Joker. She would be sad that at the end of the day she wouldn't be sleeping with David as he would be at home with Susan. Joker would be bitter that he had to spend another night on a bunk behind a heavy steel door or in a padded cell depending on how he chose to behave that day.

David climbed out of the shower and smiled at her before awkwardly picking his ring up from the counter and sliding it onto his finger. He grinned at her sheepishly and she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

"Harley," he began and she silenced him with a kiss before he could promise her once again that he and Susan were heading down the road to divorce.

"Call me." She said sweetly and the couple made their way back to her bed for a time of perfect bliss before he left her sleepy and smiling.

Once the door had closed, Harleen rushed back to the bathroom and pulled open a drawer from which she retrieved her drugstore purchase from the day before. With fingers trembling with anticipation she removed the pregnancy test from the confines of its packaging. She didn't need to read the instructions, she just went to work, peeing on the strip and setting it on the counter before jumping into the shower.

Elation filled her and her skin tingled when she read the result.

"Someone's in a good mood this morning." Joker grumbled looking up from the small plastic cup of pills and then at the cup of orange juice beside it. His brown, slightly bloodshot eyes were tired and wringed with bluish tinged skin. He hadn't been sleeping well as of late and had been experiencing headaches which he blamed his medicine for. So he had stopped taking it altogether.

Harleen mused and sat forward in her chair, unaware that the smile kept creeping back across her lips. She gently slid the cup of pills closer to her patient as if trying to entice a child to eat his Brussels sprouts. He shook his head and sat back in his seat before eyeing her warily.

"So what's the good news, Harley?" He asked ignoring her request. She sighed resignedly and sat back as well.

"The good news is that I won't revoke your smoking privileges if you take your medicine." She said tartly. He snorted a laugh.

"I've been choking down your pills for quite some time and they haven't done a damn thing for me." He said shaking his head. "I still have the same thoughts and 'impulses' you think the pills are supposed to cure. Instead they just give me headaches and hard-ons that last for days."

Harleen winced and looked at her notes, lifting a couple of pages while trying to ignore his comment. When she had first taken his case she had given him some medication which had induced prolonged, painful erections in him. As a result she had to deal with a very angry patient and write an extremely awkward letter to the drug company to report the unintended effect of their 'boner pills' as the Joker called them.

"The medication is not meant to cure you on its own. That's why we have therapy sessions, to attempt to change your thoughts and behavior." She said.

"So that I may be re-released into the wild?" He smirked. Harleen sighed.

"You know that's not an option." She replied.

"So why even try to change anything? Nothing else will change for me for the rest of my life, assuming you can keep me in here for that long." He said quirking a brow.

"We are trying to discourage that kind of behavior." She said.

"It's good to have goals." He teased, leaning toward her.

"We can set different goals for you to achieve, ones that don't involve criminal behavior." She said. He sat in seemingly deep thought for a few moments and licked his lips before settling his gaze upon her once again.

"I want to build a house entirely from beer cans." He shrugged, smiling at her. She frowned at him for a few beats and then began laughing.

"Hey!" He cried in dismay. Harleen covered her mouth and managed to suppress her laughter and caught his amused expression.

They sat quietly for a few moments, Harleen smiling widely as she reached for her take-out cup of coffee. She picked it up and looked at the beverage she had only sipped a couple of times when realization dawned upon her.

She couldn't drink caffeine anymore. She set the cup down and then eyed the Joker's glass of orange juice and fixed her eyes on his.

"Wanna trade?" She asked gently sliding her coffee cup toward him. He frowned and slid his fingers around his glass and pulled it toward himself possessively while eyeing her suspiciously.

"Why? What did you put in it?" He asked, his eyes darting between the cup and her.

"When was the last time you've had coffee?" She asked and he looked thoughtfully at the cup.

"Not since I've been here. Hmm, how curious that you doctors would allow me to smoke but not imbibe caffeine" He smirked.

"You can have this" she said setting the cup clear on his side of the table before him. Joker shrugged and slid his juice over to her before picking up the coffee and removing the lid. Harleen jumped to her feet and stood with her hand poised over the panic button while staring at him wide-eyed. He glanced at her face and chuckled before taking a sip of the coffee and making a face.

"Right, uh, after you give this to me I'm going to throw it in your face?" He chuckled and took a longer sip. "What is this, some designer coffee? You can have all the OJ you want as long as you keep bringing these in," he said swallowing his pills and then washing them down with the coffee. "Of course, that is assuming that you people aren't putting stuff in my OJ, like you would give your dog medicine."

Harleen took the juice and drank it confidently, Joker watching her curiously. She set the glass down and wiped her mouth exaggeratedly. He set his cup down and scrutinized her.

"How are ya feeling, Doc?" He asked with a mischievous grin. Harleen frowned back at him and poked her pen under a few sheets on her clipboard, raising them.

"Fine, great, how are you?" She asked avoiding his gaze. The hairs on the back of her neck raised a little, he was up to something.

"Good, especially since I didn't catch that flu virus you've had recently," his dark eyes were focused on her. She looked at him over the rim of her glasses. He licked his lips in thought as he stared her down. "Are you going to tell me the truth now?"

"What are you talking about?" She asked and then rubbed the back of her neck with her hand. Joker beamed at the sign of her discomfort and she flushed at her tell. He raised his brows at her and sat back in his chair, sitting lower than her yet still commanding her attention as he drummed the fingers of his right hand on the table.

"You're pregnant," he said. Harleen blanched and drew a sharp breath and he smirked at her.

"I didn't think this was a little 'trust' exercise." he chuckled. "You have to remember that while you live your little life in and out of here that I only see a handful of people on a regular basis, and you more often than most. In all this time you've sat there," he pointed at her, "and drank your coffee every day until today. Just now, you looked at it like it was" he waved his hands "rat poison or the like. Then you want to trade me?"

"And because of that you think I'm pregnant?" Harleen laughed and tried to look at him confidently but ended up slouching and chewing her lower lip. He rolled his eyes.

"No, because of your reaction, I know you're pregnant," he smiled and his gaze trailed down her chest while she sat forward and folded her arms defensively.

"Who's the father? I didn't know you were involved," he asked. Harleen looked away and coughed into her fist.

"This isn't about me," she began.

"Uh tut –tut. Of course this is about you, and me. You're going to have to tell your boss eventually and what's going to happen?" He tilted his head and she sighed.

"Yeah, they're going to say that I'm too dangerous for you to work with since you're knocked-up and all. They're going to reassign me to some other shrink who doesn't know their ass from a hole in the ground and you will lose your shot at 'curing' the Joker." He chuckled. Harleen shook her head.

He would make this about him. But that's her principle goal, is it not?

"I haven't given it that much thought," she said truthfully. "I only found out about it recently."

"This morning?" He asked and was amused by her non-verbal response. "So that's why we're in such a good mood. Is he happy too?" Harleen detected the same bitterness in his tone from the first time he mentioned the father.

"I, he doesn't know yet," she replied and he eyed her curiously and chewed at the scar on his left cheek.

"You're not together, 'officially' anyway. Oh the antiquated ideas of family and courtship. So, does he work here, hmm? It would be sad to discover you are slumming with one of these guards. Was it a one-time thing?" He began to prod and she knew he would be relentless.

"He doesn't work at Arkham," she began and he cut her off.

"Doctor? Lawyer? Ohh a lawyer. Won't mom and dad be so happy that their little girl netted a lawyer?" He said grinning.

"Their little girl is a doctor herself," she snorted. He shrugged it off.

"He isn't one of Arkham's lawyers is he? No, hmm, he's not my lawyer?" He eyed her and she chuckled and looked at her folded arms.

"At least you have some taste then. Is he Jewish? Yeah, well your folks will be happier still." He stopped talking as she was rubbing the back of her neck again. He leaned forward in his chair and stared at her.

"He's married." He said quietly and his eyes widened when she looked away, unable to meet his gaze. "Oh, Harley, I never saw you as a little home wrecker."

"Shut up!" She yelled and slammed her fists onto the table as she stood. Joker stared at her with a wide grin, clearly amused.

"So it's been going on for a while, huh? Let me guess, you were young and impressionable and he was distinguished and unhappy with things at home and you met at some," he shook his head unable to come up with a scenario, "thing and then the magic happened. He told you his wife was a shrew and that a pretty thing like you was what he wanted, no, needed." Harleen glared at him and he propped his chin on one hand and played with the pill cup with his other.

"Did he tell you he was going to leave his wife for you?" He asked.

"Yes," Harleen said looking at her hands.

"He lied then, they never leave. Not unless you force his hand with something, like a baby." He smirked. Harleen could have hit him.

"You are a dubious one. You've learned a lot, Harley. But I don't know that mom and dad will be so proud to learn their little princess is schtupping a married man," he said. Harleen's face was hot.

"He isn't happy with her, he's leaving her anyway," she said meeting his gaze.

"That's what they all say," Joker said in a sing-song manner. "What makes you so special?"

"Susan is a pig!" Harleen spat before she could stop herself and then she blanched and looked away. When she looked back, Joker regarded her with raised brows.

"Oh, you even know her. Well that's even better," he grinned.

Harleen dropped her head and placed her hand on her forehead. She sniffed back tears which threatened to break loose and then picked up her clipboard and stalked off to the door.

"These things never end well, Harley." His voice called after her as she left.