It was cold in the alley. It made Ted shiver a little as he leant against the wall, both palms pressed into the cold brick. Carl still hadn't closed up, even though it was way passed last call, and the noise of conversation from the last few stragglers left in the bar drifted out through the back door.

Normal conversations, because nobody knew what was happening in the alley.

There was a sudden crack in the air beside him, causing Ted to flinch, causing him to bite back a whimper. The rush of the displaced air made his cheek tingle. So close!

Ted closed his eyes.

He could hear Marshall standing about four or five feet behind him, he hear his ragged breathing, the creak of leather as his best friend of thirteen years wrapped the whip around his knuckles.

It was payback.

It was a thing between them. When Ted hurt Marshall, Marshall got to hurt him back, an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. Since their first day of college. Marshall had explained to him that it was only fair, it was the only way that two dudes could live together and not tear each other apart. It was the simple wisdom of Marshall's Minnesotan upbringing, the lesson imparted by his father.

Beaten into him by his father?

Still, it had served them well, mostly. There had been that time when Ted had accidentally hit Marshall over the head with a baseball bat and Marshall had put him in ER with concussion in return, but mostly...

Mostly...

And tonight, Marshall got to whip him.

Ted wasn't quite sure how it helped, it just did help. Marshall was one scary dude when he got angry, but Ted had never see him lay a hand on Lily. So, whatever slight disquiet he had about how much Marshall seemed to enjoy these little paybacks, he put it down to being a quirk. Just a quirk.

Everyone had their quirks.

The air beside him rang out again with another crack of the whip.

"Will you quit missing and get it over with, dude?" Ted said, his voice shaking. This was definitely going to hurt! Ted tensed against the blow that would inevitably come, against the lash of the whip against his bare back.

"It's not as easy as it looks!" Marshall laughed.

Ted had picked his back, as the place to receive the blow. He sure as hell didn't want it on his cheek or his chest. His back was hidden most of the time. It would be easy to-

His train of thought was interrupted by the sound of footsteps approaching.

"Hey guys, what's on tap-?" Barney's voice trailed off as he took in the scene. Ted, shirtless, leaning against the wall. Marshall brandishing the whip.

Ted turned around. "It's not what it looks like!" He said hurriedly.

"No, it's exactly what it looks like!" Marshall said softly, his words containing an edge of menace that Ted had never heard before.

"What the hell is... going... on..." Barney said, taking two steps back as Marshall turned and approached him.

"Just leave it alone, man," Marshall said, again in that low, slightly creepy voice. "Just turn around, find a cab, and go on home."

"But- But- Marshall!" Barney protested, amazingly holding his ground. "You... Ted? The Dominator 8000?"

Ted tried to interject. "Barney, it's just a thing we do-"

"A thing you do?" Barney shouted, incredulously.

"No... no... not like that!" Ted said, although he really hoped Barney didn't jump to the conclusion that there was anything sexual about this. Far from it! It was just one man... punishing... another man... with a whip. Okay, that did look a little weird. "Look, I hit Marshall in the face, so he gets one free shot."

"Sure!" Barney said bitterly. "Sure, Bro. That's why Marshall has the biggest hard on in the history of... the BDSM scene!"

Ted spluttered a protest, squinting to see if that was true. It was hard to tell in the low light but... holy shit!

Barney was right!

"Marshall," Barney said, stridently, actually shoving the big man in the chest. "That's it. You said you wouldn't do this again. You fucking promised, dude. If you're gonna take your... frustrations... out on anyone else than me, then find yourself another... sex monkey!"

He tries to turn away but Marshall held onto his arm.

"Sex monkey?" Ted coughed, half laughing. This was ridiculous. Barney was making some kind of inexplicable joke. For some... reason. That he couldn't fathom.

And Marshall had a hard on.

And Marshall was pulling Barney towards him while his friend struggled to get away.

Ted gaped.

Then something clicked into focus, the glass shattered, memories realigned. Of Barney repeatedly getting jobs for Marshall so they could work together. Of mysterious bruises. Of the two of them disappearing sometimes.

Of...

How long had this been going on, Ted wanted to know. But instead of asking, he backed away into the doorway, where it was safe and warm and light. Silently, he shrugged his shirt back on, and he tried not to notice how Marshall pushed Barney up against the concrete with his hand around the slender man's throat.

"It's for his own good," Marshall said, releasing their friend, who coughed a couple of times, but made no move to escape. "Someone has to keep Barney in line." There was a predatory gleam in Marshall's eyes.

"And you do that by having sex with him?" Ted asked, hurriedly buttoning his shirt."And hurting him?"

"It keeps Lily safe," Barney gasped, rubbing his throat.

Ted backed through the doorway, bile in his throat. It kept Lily safe, but what about Barney?

That was no excuse. No excuse at all.