I doubt that anyone will be interested or anything, but… uh… here you go I guess…

(I don't own Death Note)

I woke up one morning in a nice mood. That was probably because there was no school today and I slept in really late (4:27 PM… What, I didn't get to sleep until 9:52!), so I got a lot of rest, even if I was a little hungry…

I stood up and looked in the mirror on my door. Same as always, no miraculous change in my appearance, I still looked like a twelve year old girl with short garnet hair, blue eyes, and Kingdom Hearts pajamas. Getting dressed this morning was a difficult task, because of a simple problem that every girl in the world has or will encounter in their lives. "What am I going to wear today?" I finally settled on a plain pair of jeans and a black T-shirt that said, 'Of course I can fly, I just land fast.'

I walked through my adopted parents apartment and flopped lazily onto one of the black leather sofa. I turned my head to the right to see two men frenching each other on the other couch. That would've been unusual, except for the fact that those were my parents. Yeah, they're gay, but who cares? But if you call Mom gay to his face, he'll shoot your head off. He's in denial. (At least in public)

I cleared my throat, but neither of them noticed me, they just kept making out. This was gonna take a while.

The one wearing all leather with long blond hair and the chocolate bar is Mom. I call him Mom because he always has to dress up like a girl when we go in public, besides, he's the only one who could pull it off. He also works in the mafia. Sometimes Mom has anger issues, like when somebody mistakes him for a girl, when people eat his chocolate, or when Dad won't stop playing videogames and pay attention to him. It's like PMS, only never ending.

The guy with the red hair, goggles, and the striped shirt is my Dad. People actually think I'm his daughter when we go shopping and stuff, I look so much like him. There's not much to know about him, but he's always playing videogames. He smokes sometimes too. Dad is the one that always has to go out to get Mom more chocolate. His personality is the opposite of Mom's, he's more laidback and willing to do whatever crazy schemes to beat Uncle Near that he cooks up.

Speaking of cooking, neither of them can. We always have it delivered, go out to eat, or pray to whatever god is out there that the food doesn't blow up again when we try to make it. The last time any of us had food from home that actually turned out edible was when Mom invited Uncle L and his boyfriend Beyond Birthday over and his butler Watari made us dinner. Beyond had told me he was a serial killer, and when I ran to Mom, Dad, and Uncle L, they said it was true. I ended up being his friend somehow.

"Hey, child in the room!" I called, but, as usual, getting no response.

Let me explain who I am and why I'm even here in the first place. My name is Rikay, and I've had so many last names that I don't even bother with them anymore. My real family died in a fire. I kind of don't like talking about it, so don't get your hopes up. My current parents were the first ones who actually could handle me, seeing as I accidentally/purposely got kicked out of four other homes. I remember grinning while the caretaker drove me back.

"Mom." I called, hearing my stomach rumble slightly. They (Finally!) broke apart and Mom laid his head on Dad's shoulder. "Yeah, Ri-chan?" He asked.

"What are we doing for dinner tonight?" I inquired. He thought for a moment. "Matt, what do you want tonight?" Dad grinned suggestively.

"I meant for dinner."

He frowned. "Oh… well… whatever you want. But no chocolate this time." Mom and I groaned in unison. "How about Taco Bell?" I proposed. Dad shrugged. "Sounds okay."

"Great, now that that's settled, Matty, go buy me some chocolate." Mom commanded cheerily. Dad sighed and headed toward the door, snagging his Pokémon wallet from the table next to it as he went. When the door swung shut, Mom and I grinned. "Commence Operation: No Smokey." He said. I nodded. We ran to their room and Mom took out a cardboard box.

"Alright, find all the cigarettes you can and put them in here." We started searching all over the room.

Fifteen minutes later, the box was almost full.

"Do you think that's it?" I panted.

Mom nodded, exhausted. "Let's get rid of this before your Dad comes home." He picked up the box and we walked out the door and to the dumpster. When we got back to the apartment, Mom spoke up. "He doesn't have any cigarettes with him… I took care of that." He smirked. "You still know where the supplies for Plan B are, right?" I nodded, sitting on the couch and turning the TV to the Food Channel.

Just in time, Dad opened the door, a stack of cardboard boxes covering his face. "Hey, what's up?" He grunted under the weight of the chocolate.

"Nothing." Mom said, not a trace of any sort of emotion in his voice. Dad sat the heavy cargo down and went to his and Mom's room. Mom greedily ripped open one of the boxes and unwrapped a chocolate bar faster than you could say his name.

Loud shuffling that sounded like somebody was digging through the room franticly was heard from the direction of the hall. Mom smirked and tossed me a chocolate bar. "Well this is a first." I giggled, tearing open the wrapper and taking a bite. Mom never shares his chocolate with anyone. "Well right now, it's a special occasion." The smirk turned into a grin as Dad came running into the room.

"Where are my cigs?"

It took all my knowledge of how to act, which was quite a lot, not to start laughing. "What are you talking about? Didn't you buy some yesterday?" Mom questioned convincingly. "Yeah, he did, I was there, remember?" I said. Dad looked like he was going to tear out his hair. "I need them! You know how Mello gets when he doesn't have chocolate? That's me, only ten times worse!" He shouted. Mom looked at me.

"Rikay, time for Plan B." I nodded. Mom took his hand and pulled him to the couch, pinning him down. "Quick, get the stuff!" He yelled. I ran to a supply closet and grabbed a roll of duct tape.

"I got it!" I called as I ran back.

A long while later, after the surprisingly difficult challenge of trying to tape Dad to a chair, we finally got him.

"Mmmrph!" He tried to scream, but his mouth was taped shut.

Mom and I did a high-five and grinned. "That was fun." I commented. Mom giggled and gave Dad a peck on the forehead. He let out another yell, quieted by the piece of tape. I suddenly remembered something when my stomach growled again.

"Mom, weren't we going to get Taco bell or something?" I asked.

He paused. "Oh damn. I'm going to have to use the girl disguise again." He said sadly. I smirked and opened the supply closet again, pulled out a small box, and went back to Mom, who groaned.

Twenty minutes later, Mom was wearing a pink T-shirt and blue jeans with black high heels. He was also had on bluish eye shadow, black mascara and eyeliner, and a light red lipstick, courtesy of yours truly. He even wore a bra stuffed with tissues. I examined my masterpiece and grinned. "Okay, time to go." I giggled. He huffed and picked up the black leather purse I set on the couch.

A muffled cry came from behind us. Mom turned around. "Don't worry Matty, we'll be home in about a half hour. You can just think of how much you love us until then." With that, we walked out the door.