Mollilily Potter and Breaking Wind

Part one:

How might Stephenie Meyer have written the ending of the Harry Potter series?

It was a very nice morning, as nice mornings tend to go, and Harry Potter was awake in the boy's dormitory of Gryffindor Tower. He was thinking about what he was going to do that day, and he was hoping he would succeed. There were quite a few people who hoped he would succeed as well.

Harry Potter was going to kill Voldemort.

The clock on the table beside him told him that it was very early, but he got up all the same, put on his school robes and walked down to the Great Hall to enjoy a lovely breakfast of fluffy pancakes.

Ron and Hermione joined him a few minutes later, with very somber looks on their faces. They sat down on either side of their best friend. Harry looked up from his breakfast, which had turned into a bowl of cereal, and noticed his friends' faces.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know," Ron answered. "You-Know-Who and stuff."

"Oh, right," Harry said. He went back to his plate of waffles.

Suddenly the large doors opened up and Professor Trelawney stumbled into the hall. "That battle has started!" she yelled, in a misty voice.

Harry jumped up from his seat very quickly. The students around him were looking very nervous, but Harry was not afraid. He took out his wand and held it very tightly, leaving his bowl of fruit forgotten on the table. Ron and Hermione followed him outside.

Voldemort and his Death Eaters were standing outside on the lawn and Voldemort had his wand held high, pointed straight at Harry.

The Hogwarts students had followed the trio outside, and Ginny ran forward to stand at Harry's side. "Harry," she murmured, looking into his beautiful green eyes, staring at the flawless planes of his skin, the perfect shape of his nose, admiring his lips, remembering the feel of them against hers.

"Harry, I love you so much," she said, putting her hands on his cheek and leaning into him. "You mean so much to me. I can remember so clearly the first time I met you, the first time I saw your face and I knew that I wanted you, and if you would ever leave - "

"Um, Ginny?" Harry interrupted.

"What, my love?"

"Could you talk about this later?"

Ginny turned to look at Voldemort and his supporters. "I suppose," she said, pouting.

"Good," Harry muttered, and he stepped forward to glare at Voldemort. He stared into his blood red eyes, and gazed over his icy pale skin, the cold set of his lips, the way he sneered….

"Hello, Voldemort," Harry said.

Voldemort rolled his red eyes and tried to pinch the bridge of his nose, until he remembered that he didn't really have one. "What have I told you about calling me that?"

"Oh, it doesn't matter what anyone calls you anymore," Harry shouted.

"I love you my beautiful, gorgeous, angel-like - "

"Ginny, shut up!"

"Sorry!"

Harry shook his head to clear it after the interruption. "What – oh, right - Avada Kedavra you arse!"

And Voldemort was dead.

There were cheers and shrieks from the Hogwarts students. Voldemort's supporters cowered in fear and ran off.

"Harry, you did it!" Ron cheered.

But Hermione didn't look very happy. "Harry, how could you? You've ended the conflict halfway through the freaking book! I hope you have some great plotline up your sleeve!"

Harry scowled for a moment and looked at his friends. "Hey everybody! Ginny's pregnant!"

Three months later Harry was sitting in the Weasley's den. He had to tell Mr. Weasley that he had knocked up his daughter.

"So Harry, I heard you had some good news."

Harry nodded. "Good, random, totally unexpected and rather stupid – what ever you'd like to call it."

"So Harry, what would you like to tell me?"

"Well Mr. Weasley, Ginny and I - "

"You got her pregnant, didn't you!" Mr. Weasley shouted. He got up from his seat very suddenly and pulled out his wand, shoving it into Harry's face. "You little - "

"Stop it, stop it!" Ginny shrieked. "Harry didn't do anything."

"What are you talking about, Ginny?" Harry demanded.

"Well, I remembered last night," she murmured quietly. "I was hanging out with Lupin once and - "

"WHAT!" Mr. Weasley and Harry exclaimed at the same time.

"Oh, come on. Lupin's so cute…."

But Harry wasn't listening. He had just realized something and he was beginning to become very anxious. "Lupin's a werewolf!" he shrieked, and the same moment Ginny grabbed her stomach.

"You've got to be kidding me," Ron said. "Ginny wants to keep her baby? Has she lost her mind?"

Harry didn't answer. He had a very strange look in his deep, smoldering, breathtakingly beautiful eyes. Hermione thought he looked like a "Burning Man."

"But Harry," she said. "She can do whatever she wants, she's a mother, you can't expect her - "

"Oh, shut up!" Harry shouted. "You're just jealous! I know you hooked up with Ron, I've heard you in your room – mind you, I'd appreciate it if you kept it down. You want Ginny's baby!"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "That's stupid."

But Harry was now staring desperately at Ron. "You have to help her," he begged. "She would listen to you! Make her see some sense! Give her a baby if you have to!"

"Harry, she's my sister!"

"I don't care!"

But Ron wouldn't agree.

Harry tried to talk to Ginny that night, but she wouldn't listen to him.

"How could you Ginny? I thought you loved me!"

"I do," she insisted.

"Then why did you sleep with Lupin?"

"Harry," Ginny said, exasperated. "Lupin is really cute and - "

"But Ginny - "

Ginny stamped her foot very prissily. "Don't go yelling at me," she complained. "It was your idea anyway."

She stalked to the door. "Stupid plotline."

Six months later, Ginny gave birth to a little baby girl. Against reason, Harry fell in love with his daughter the moment he saw her, even though Ginny almost died, but Harry miraculously saved her, so it was fine.

"Oh Harry, she's so pretty," Ginny cooed, admiring her baby. "What do you want to call her?"

Harry thought about that for a moment. "What about Mollilily?"

"Mollilily? That's the stupidest name I ever heard!"

"Hey, it's unique!"

Though Harry had been very afraid about his werewolf daughter, he realized very quickly that his initial thoughts had been wrong.

Mollilily was a perfect baby. She grew very quickly, and Ginny was slightly nervous about that, but Mollilily was such a good baby that she tended to forget about that frequently.

Mollilily was beautiful, and cute and smart, and Harry and Ginny loved her very much.

Hermione and Ron were spending a lot of time in their room.

A few months later, the Potters were enjoying a lovely lunch when suddenly Professor Trelawney burst through the door. "The Death Eaters heard about Mollilily and they want to kill her because Harry killed Voldemort!"

Harry looked at her strangely. "Why do they care about Mollilily?"

Professor Trelawney shrugged. "I don't know," she murmured in a very misty voice.

Ginny showed her the door.

"Harry, are you sure you want to trust what she said?" Hermione nagged for the millionth time. "Trelawney's not exactly that great when it comes to fortune telling."

Harry sighed. "I know, but honestly, no one wants to read a story about Mollilily."

That was very true, Mollilily was sickly sweet and perfect, and Harry was starting to get bored of her.

"Well I suppose if you really believe her…."

Harry nodded.

"Right," Ron agreed. "What do you want to do?"

Harry thought for a moment. "I'm not sure; I don't want to fight them. Herm, Gin, what do you think?"

Hermione and Ginny looked at him very strangely. "Herm, Gin?"

Harry rolled his eyes. "Oh, you know. Those are the nicknames we've always called you, but have never actually used in the book. Go with it."

Ginny was very sure that Harry was losing his mind, but she didn't comment. Hermione, however, had just come up with an idea. "Harry, what if you collected a ton of random witches and wizards, and convinced them that Mollilily's so adorable and the Death Eaters shouldn't kill her, or you for that matter."

"Hmm," Harry said. "That doesn't make any sense at all. Great idea, Hermione!"

The Potter's, Weasley's, and Hermione set off to collect as many wizards as they could. They gathered many of their old friends from Hogwarts, who had never before been mentioned – Patty Mondues, a young blond witch who had been in Ravenclaw and was very pretty; Suzanne Perftechtisdhe, another witch, who liked cats and had been in Hufflepuff; Tommy Hswjospgnkejria, who had been in Slytherin, but Harry had known him all his life (he forgot to mention him though); Sally Fkoeunfkfhjseilefj, who was from Hufflepuff and she owned a cat name Pussy Wussy; Greg Rjfkoeanufineola, who was from Gryffindor actually, and his mother was very strange and liked to sleep around; Nunu Oppksefjfefsa, who no one really knew much about; Lisa Weefcbe, who was from Ravenclaw, and didn't have any friends; Matt Moayde, who had a very embarrassing medical disorder; Benny Kcawdfc, who brought his siblings Wendy, Ken, and Barbie along with him; Quence Measde, who thought he could play the piano; Rachel Topce, who was from Gryffindor and didn't know how to tie her shoes, and a few others who had walked in looking for directions to the freeway. (* You can view a full list at the bottom).

They showed their wonderful guests how great Mollilily was and that she wasn't dangerous, and they hoped that they would be able to prove to the Death Eaters as well.

Two days before the war was scheduled, Hermione and Ron disappeared. Harry and the Weasleys were very afraid, and they searched for them in the whole Burrow. Harry went to their bedroom, which was covered in feathers for some reason, and found a book lying on the floor.

He picked it up to read the title. Hogwarts, A History – Hermione's favorite book, why would she leave it behind?

So Harry lifted the cover and looked inside. There was a message on the first page, and Harry was sure it was some words of comfort, or help. He leaned very closely to it and read:

Dear Har, Gin, Mol, and all,

Ha ha ha! Suckers!

Herm and Ro

And Harry didn't know why, but he felt like they were not going to win.

Mollilily was still growing very fast, and Ginny was becoming a pest about it.

"Oh, Mollilily! I love you so much. I can remember the first time I saw you, the first time I gazed at your perfect skin, the lovely set of your lips. I love the look you can have in your eyes when you see someone you love, the way you can giggle when someone tickles you, how your joy and your glee can fill the room with happiness, how soft and warm you can be, how quietly you can sleep - "

"Gin!" Harry finally called.

"What love?"

"Shut up!"

"Sorry."

Suddenly Professor Trelawney ran through the door, panting. "The Death Eaters have arrived. They are ready to fight!"

Ginny looked at her with great distaste. "We really shouldn't let her into the house."

Ginny was holding Mollilily very tightly and was standing beside Harry. She was very anxious.

The Death Eaters had spread out in a large line and they had even brought their wives with them, for some moral support or something.

"So," Harry called. "What do you want?"

The Death Eaters started laughing. "We want that baby!" Lucius Malfoy answered, sneering very evilly.

Harry glared. "Mollilily did nothing wrong. She's perfect and she's not dangerous at all!" Harry pointed to the people he had gathered. "Even they can prove it!"

Malfoy laughed. "Oh, we know," he answered. "We want her cause she's so dang cute!"

The Death Eaters started giggling and cooing. "Hello, pretty baby!" some of them called.

"Well, you can't have her!" Harry shouted.

"We can have whatever we want!"

"That's what you think!"

The Death Eaters were laughing. "You think you can outsmart us?" Malfoy taunted. "What great rebuttal do you have prepared?"

Harry looked around at the people beside him. They shrugged their shoulders.

Harry gulped and was about to give up, when suddenly Ginny let out a small sigh. "Hermione," she whipered.

Hermione.

Hermione, Hermione, Hermione.

And suddenly Hermione burst into the circle, smiling from ear to ear!

"Oh, Hermione, we missed you!" Harry cheered.

Hermione grinned at him then turned towards the Death Eaters. "You can't have Mollilily!" she shouted. "Ron and I went and did some research on werewolf babies and stuff, and we came up with some great information and some highly interesting things!"

Harry watched the Death Eaters gasp. Lucius Malfoy scowled. "Bugger," he muttered, and the Death Eaters ran away.

Everyone cheered, and Hermione was enveloped in many hugs.

Later that day, Harry and Ginny were in their bedroom. They had put Mollilily in her crib and they were going to bed.

"It's so great that Hermione turned up just in time!" Ginny said, pulling on her nightgown.

"Yes," Harry agreed.

"I was starting to get very nervous," Ginny continued.

"So was I."

Ginny nodded. "I love you Harry," she said quietly, pulling him onto the bed beside her. "I loved you the first time I saw you. I love your beautiful eyes, the flawless planes of your face, the smoothness of your lips, the warmth of your hand, and the - "

"SHUT UP GINNY!"

"Sorry!"

* Witches and Wizard Who Were Introduced, Though They Weren't Important At All:

Patty Mondues

Suzanne Perftechtisdhe

Tommy Hswjospgnkejria

Sally Fkoeunfkfhjseilefj

Greg Rjfkoeanufineola

Nunu Oppksefjfefsa

Lisa Weefcbe

Matt Moayde

Benny Kcawdfc

Wendy Kcawdfc

Ken Kcawdfc

Barbie Kcawdfc

Quence Measde

Rachel Topce

Some travelers who were in search of the freeway

A/N: Please review!