Disclaimer: It's not mine.
AN: Ahahahaha. Haha.
Ha.
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Mr. Talkative
By Azar-Apocalypse
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"Is something wrong?" Light asks, hunched over his desk and watching with disgust as L shovels yet another spoonful of a sugary concoction that might have once passed for tea into the seemingly bottomless pit that is his mouth.
L gazes over at him, licks his lips, and replies slowly, "I'm fine." One of his eyebrows is cocked in bewilderment and Light thinks to himself that it looks quite stupid. L momentarily pauses in his consumption of sugar to guardedly eye Light and add suspiciously, "Why do you ask, Light-kun?"
With a nonchalant shrug, Light surreptitiously glances at the stack of unread files in front of L - the same stack that has been sitting there, in exactly the same place, on exactly the same desk, for the past week. "No reason," he says. "I'm just curious, I suppose. You haven't been concentrating," he gestures vaguely toward the pile, where he swears he can see dust beginning to accumulate on the uppermost paper, "and you're just not very talkative, today."
L looks at the papers, too, and says, "I'm talkative. I'm the definition of 'talkative'." Oh no. Here it comes: the verbal diarrhoea that L is prone to and which Light knows will not end until someone manages to interject with a rhetoric witty enough to shut L up again - and today, it will not be him to stem the flow. He's filled that position too many times and knows that it usually only results in a horrible and messy backlash. "You could even say, Light-kun, that I'm Mr. Talkative."
"Hey, keep your voice down," Light mumbles awkwardly at L's clear, ringing voice. He hopes his father doesn't hear this.
Matsuda has stopped working to watch what Light imagines is probably a very interesting spectacle, but L still will not stop in his tirade; in fact, he is slowly gaining speed and seems quite delighted by Light's apparent embarrassment.
"There hasn't been a time in my life when I haven't been talkative - not even in utero, which is quite an impressive feat," L continues cheerfully, apparently unfazed. "It has even been said before that I put the 'dick' in 'talkative'."
Light is sure that his face is burning. L does not seem perturbed in the slightest.
After choking out an odd, coughing sort of sound to hide whatever else L intends to say, Light splutters, "R-Ryuuzaki! Don't be ridiculous. There's no need to use language like that." L quirks a brow and Light mutters, distinctly feeling as if he has fallen into some sort of trap of L's devise, "Besides, there's no 'dick' in 'talkative'."
L smiles; pauses for what Light likes to imagine is dramatic effect (but is really only an excuse for L to spoon even more sugar into his gullet); and finally says, "Oh, my mistake, Light-kun. I must've left it in your mother. Oops."
While L looks quite pleased with himself, Matsuda giggles uncomfortably and quickly buries himself under the dusty stack of paperwork, and Light secretly regrets teaching L the meaning of friendly banter.
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Ha.
Oh jeez.
I really need to get out more.