VI

J U L Y

Ino was clearing a table in the midst of a noontime rush when she felt it again. She'd lost count of how many times a day she had this feeling shimmy down her spine. It reminded her of the times when she was unstable, when she was severely paranoid, as if every object were staring at her with cold murderous eyes. It was indeed that feeling of being watched, but in a different way. To put it more accurately, this sharp little feeling took her back to even earlier days. In school: when she was a little flame that drew in the moths. She knew it wasn't her imagination, not since the confession weeks ago.

Sakura's eyes followed her everywhere. She knew they were there even when neither was aware. She wondered how long this had been going on. Yet she couldn't blame her. Sakura watched her like a puppy in the rain. She was so sad. She tried to hide it, but she was sad. People are smart enough to figure that out. Ino was smart enough to figure it out.

What could she do?

That night Sakura had crept into her room, her face practically burning with apprehension. She'd expected rejection, yet she didn't even give her time to consider one syllable. Yes or no—not even a maybe. She'd presented the question and run off again in all of two heartbeats. She's set herself up to fall but refused to take the dive. For the past two weeks they barely spoke, barely made eye contact. Sakura stared when she wasn't looking, and Ino admitted she did the same. She told herself it was only because she wanted to know whether she was watching her. But it sounded more hollowed every time. They were like schoolgirls with their first crush. Their routine went on the same nonetheless. The kids felt the tension too—she knew. So far they haven't asked. Ino had time to consider the question. She knew long before the question was posed. It was obvious. Sakura's tentative approach and uneasy posture when they spoke, her trail of little sacrifices of time and money, her inability to make direct eye contact for more than three seconds. It was all there. She was sweeter than any man had ever been. The effort she put in to make her happy bested even her ex-husband. It was no secret—she and Sasuke were madly in love at one point in their lives. They went to great lengths for each other. Her, for one, sacrificed the love of her family, and he…she couldn't even remember.

She was flattered to say the least. The problem was that she wasn't sure she was capable of loving with such intensity ever again.

She just didn't know what to say or do. Gratefulness did not equal love. She'd taken everything but had given none. Could she love a woman out of obligation to her conscience? A woman. That shouldn't bother her, but it made her uncomfortable. She couldn't lie. Her life had been so full of lies at one point that she'd truly forgotten what it meant to be honest and in love. Her children were the only anchor to remind her. But Sakura, she was simple in a different sense. Different from what she was used to. Now that it was confirmed that the woman had feelings for her, what should she do? Should she choose rationale over her gut again? The deepest, most illogical part of her said yes. Go out with her, give her a chance. That much you owe her. But the mind said no. She'd just end up hurting the poor woman.

What is she supposed to do? What about her own feelings? She didn't love her, at least not now, not that she was aware, so how could she pretend to reciprocate her feelings? Perhaps she could learn to love her. It didn't seem hard. Nonetheless the idea loomed above her head, a great black mass haunting her. That thing called fear.

"Excuse me," said a small echo in her head. Ino dismissed it.

"Excuse me!" it cried, shaking Ino from her puzzle of thought. She hadn't even realized she was with customers. The man in front of her frowned. "Are you alright?" he said with a disdained politeness rather than genuine concern.

"Yes, yes, I'm so sorry," Ino replied with a small bend at the waist. "What can I do for you?"

He huffed and complained. Something about his coffee. As if on auto-pilot, Ino walked over to the bar to inform Sakura. There was nothing awkward about conversation between them when it was work related and spoken almost instinctively. It saddened Ino to think this was now the extent of their relationship. Sakura had been a good friend to her when she had none. Now they were merely robots working in the same quadrant.

Temari and Tenten walked in right after the noontime surge as usual. And as usual they were chatting happily as they crossed the window, hands interwoven and completely lost in each other. Even Tenten, who was usually so calm and cool, softened just for Temari when nobody appeared to be watching. It must be nice, Ino thought absently.

Today, however, there was something especially bright about the smiles on their faces.

"Hey you two," Temari said. She was so excited she even broke her routine of ordering first. "Tenten"—she emphasized, squeezing her shoulder—"and I have come up with the most brilliant plan!"

"Well, actually," Tenten cut in, "it's a rather simple solution."

"What's the problem?" That was Sakura, peering out from the cupboards. She had been organizing her coffee grinds and tea leaves trying to find the perfect combinations for a new menu item. That was all she tried to think about. Sometimes Ino would see her in the kitchen at three in the morning trying to blend together the perfect coffee or tea. It was a way of coping, she'd guessed.

Temari shook her head. "Oh, it's not a problem per say," she said, "just a bit of a dilemma I guess. Well, to be honest I'd gotten myself in a bit of trouble. See, my brother somehow had the idea that Tenten and I had a couple of kids. He's coming to town this weekend to see them. He never visits me so I don't want to disappoint him. So, uh, can we borrow yours for tonight?"

"How did you manage that?" Ino asked.

"Let's not get into that," Tenten intercepted. "As we all know she's the master of the art of stupidity."

Ino looked at Sakura. Sakura stared back, mirroring her dumbfounded expression. "You've got to be kidding," one of them said. Both were thinking the exact same thing.

"This is ridiculous!" One of them began.

"Yes! You can't just go around deciding these things yourselves!"

"And the kids…"

"Temari will corrupt them for sure."

"They're my children! You can't just borrow them like some sort of condiment whenever you feel like it!"

And so the exclamations continued all the same. Ino and Sakura talked over each other, and their words shot up and vanished into thin air before Tenten's eyes. Temari pinched the bridge of her nose. Perhaps she should've just told them the truth. And say, "Why yes, we feel your kids are a nuisance. You two need a weekend to kiss and make up, so we'll be babysitting for you!" Temari the Super Nanny. That's a laugh. There was no easy way to pull a mother away from her children, but it was a necessary move. Still, Temari had to wonder how Sakura did recklessly saintly deeds like this on a daily basis. A weekend was enough sacrifice as it was.

Tenten, on the hand, saw through their knowing eyes. They needed the time to work things out. It was just a matter of accepting this excuse. Whatever came out of their mouths now were just obligations as parents. She knew if Judgement Day came unexpectedly Ino would be forced to make her choice and Sakura would be forced to confront it. They're hot-blooded and young, and there was no time like the present to awaken the beast within.

Tenten smiled to herself. It was brilliant. She just wished Temari would come up with a better excuse. So much for Temari's so-called skills and alleged badassedness. She always bragged prematurely. She should've known. The only thing she didn't brag about prematurely was her prowess in bed. But that's another story.

She touched the warm hand at her waist and waited.

Friday came and Temari found herself wanting to curl up with an Aspirin-badly. Chikao tugged and Chika cried. How and why Sakura chose to deal with these little monsters flew right above their heads. She thought this would be easy. Dinner, TV, sleep by early evening. She thought she'd romp the night away despite the impossible favour. She'd sadly, sorely, taken children much, much too lightly. She suddenly saw both Ino and Sakura in a new light. She suddenly held them on a new shiny pedestal. This night was never going to end.

"Temari, Temari! What's this?" While she was busy coaxing Chika with a rubber ducky—the only unadulterated toy she owned—Chikao was busy exploring. She didn't want him snooping, but it was one or the other, and Chika was the clingy loud one who bumped into things. Besides, what would she tell Ino if Chika accidentally rammed her head in some corner or another? Tenten was preparing dinner. She couldn't ask her to juggle sharp knives and soft children.

Temari gaped. She closed her eyes and wished beyond all hope that she was hallucinating. Her breath came in steady but forced intervals.

"What's this?" Chikao repeated, waddling closer. "It says it's a…Ma…Ma…ji…ck…Bull…it? I thought you make food with that…Saku-mama has one of those! But it doesn't look like this. How do you make food with this?" He flipped the toy over and rolled it around, looking for the right side up. He inspected it from every angle, but he couldn't figure out what it did. It was a box attached to a string that had an egg shaped piece stuck on it. He flipped the switch. The toy writhed to life like a snake wrestling its prey. Chikao shrieked and it soared, whizzing right past Temari's right ear. Temari watched it with eyes wide open, as if seeing it for the first time as it shook against the sofa's leather. Chika didn't move; her ears perked at the sound.

"Woah," Chikao murmured.

"What happened?" Tenten came charging out of the kitchen with an argyle apron and a wooden spoon in hand. Temari grinned, trying her best to look innocent and unaffected by her partner's housewife demeanour.

But Tenten was not pleased in the slightest. "Temari," she said in her subtle seething kind of way, "What, pray tell, is Ino's 6-year-old son doing with your…toy? Actually you know what? I don't even want to know."

"But! Tenten! Please, I don't have anything to do with it! He found it—"

"No. Stop. I don't wanna hear it," she said, shaking her head as she closed the kitchen door. Did that door close louder than usual? At least now Temari knew what kind of mother she would be. That was a bad sign. She knew Tenten was quite fond of kids, and she didn't mind if it made her happy. "They're as good as they come," she remembered Ino saying of her own kids one day. Temari sighed. There would be no favours tonight, she thought. She picked up the toy and stomped away from the children.

Chikao scrambled next to his sister, guilty, as she held his hand, saying nothing. An innocent enough gesture. But they knew they weren't about to make life easy for the ever-gracious Auntie Temari.

They sat together in silence as the muted television played on. Their eyes met whenever the screen was dark enough to catch a clear glimpse of their reflections. The extent of their relationship, Ino recalled her earlier thought. She shook her head. Tenten and Temari set them up, yet she could not deny what a golden opportunity this was. The only problem was how completely sudden this situation was. If she asked her for an answer, what was she supposed to say now that she was backed up against a wall?

She couldn't take the silence. It was driving her into all sorts of places she didn't want to be in. "Sure is quiet without them," she said, just to berate herself right after for the redundancy of such an obvious statement.

"Yeah. It really is."

Neither questioned why it was that way. Neither claimed to know or care why the TV was muted or what the flickering was even about. The very thought of being in each other's company alone frightened them to death. How could they care about such trivialities now that this fear had become reality?

"I miss them," Ino said.

"Me too."

Ino suddenly turned to stare straight at Sakura. The couch squeaked in response to the sudden movement. Sakura stared back in panic, her body tense. "Why is this so damn hard?" Ino asked.

"I'm sorry?"

"Look, about the other night," Ino started.

She paused to take a breath and choose her words carefully, but was, almost reflexively it seemed, intercepted by Sakura. "Oh yeah, about that. Don't worry about it. I don't know why I did that. I know you're different. I don't want to make you feel like you owed me."

"Sakura," Ino said, biting her lip. She'd eased her fears and yet all it did was make her feel worse. The guilt. "I…already kind of knew. And I've been thinking. You're a wonderful person, and the kids love you. You're virtually everything anyone could ever ask for. But…"

"Like I said, I really don't expect you to reciprocate. I guess."

"The thing is…"

"You don't have to say anything."

"No, I do. I mean it took a while but I made a decision. So here's what I think-"

"No, Ino, it's fine really. I just—"

"Sakura! Stop!" Ino said, shooting off the couch with the intensity of her words. "Just be quiet and listen before I change my mind." Sakura clapped her mouth shut, and shrank a little. Ino sat down again, this time closer. "I'll admit," She continued, "I'm scared. I don't know what my decision will impact, but I do know that I care about you too. And I'm not liking the silence between us. But that's only a very, very small factor to my decision. I'm a selfish person, Sakura. I won't deny. I've weighed the pros and cons, and the possibility of our future together. At first I said to myself that I will never go out with another woman simply because I am indebted to her. But then I realized, you haven't been just another woman.

"Three days ago, you ran out to save a little kid with an ice cream cone. Do you remember that? You saved her from the stray dog. It went crazy and you actually ran out and saved her. It was just a bite that day, but what if it had rabies? The fact that you'd do that for someone you didn't know is just…unbelievable. So maybe you're confusing this kind of thing with love?"

"N-no!" Sakura exclaimed without hesitation. She tried to relax her muscles, though she couldn't recall when they'd tightened this much. "I do love you, Ino. I really do." She sucked in a deep breath and slowly exhaled. "It used to be about helping you and fulfilling my own needs in doing so, but it's not like that anymore. I just…want to spend the rest of my life with you, Chika, and Chikao. I want to protect you. I can't really explain it any more than that. I-I'm sorry if that sounds extreme but that's just…the way I feel."

"Then," Ino replied tentatively, "kiss me. Let me know for sure so I can decide."

Sakura nodded. Or shook. Or both. She wasn't sure and she didn't feel in control of herself at all.

It was a slow ascension, that kiss. A collision in slow motion. Sakura was fearful and held her emotions just out of reach. She quivered, her hands shaking as they held her cheeks. Ino watched her carefully. Perhaps she'd made the wrong choice after all. She was two blinks away from pushing her off and Sakura knew this.

So she took the initiative and broke it first. "I'm sorry," she breathed. "I'm usually not like this. I mean, you just...came out of the blue and gave me the opportunity of the lifetime. And I screwed up. I can't believe…I…this is a dream." She hung her head. She was only centimetres away from Ino and yet it was as if they were on a parallel. Ino held her breath and suddenly felt the tension in her shoulders. There was something about the moment then. Something about the way her hair fell over her teary eyes. Something about the way she hovered over her. Something about the silence around them and the echoes of her breathing. Something that told her to do something crazy.

She touched her cheeks-blocked out all rationality-and rushed in before her mind can conjure up any more flimsy excuses. She sparked an unexpected flame as soon as their lips touched. Sakura came to life like a marionette, puppeteered by her passion alone. Ino felt her own hands run themselves in her hair, felt her own tongue welcoming Sakura's. She felt hands run along her spine, over her body and coming dangerously close to where she wanted them to be. Their breasts pressed together, sending newfound signals to her brain. The buttons on her blouse seemed to pop off on their own one after another. A hand came between their breasts and a hand across her stomach.

There was flannel under her jacket. Ino hated flannel. Only someone like Sakura could pull it off. That boyish side is so endearing. But not tonight. She tore it off. They fell to her elbows, leaving a white tank top behind. She couldn't stand the layers. She couldn't stand all that stood between them.

She arched her body into Sakura's, desperate for something, anything, a touch, a kiss, something more…something more, more, more. More, her own voice chanted in her head, more, and more, and more.

Then a breeze across her lips. The clock started ticking again.

They stared at each other in disbelief, eyes still dark from emotion. Their breathing became so loud. It felt like they were the only people breathing in this world and the next.

"Why?" Ino whispered. "Why did you stop?"

"It was the only place I could, Ino," she replied, her voice tinted dark with sadness. Her eyes were still dark, cheeks still flushed. The emotion hadn't yet escaped. "I don't want you regretting a decision you made in the heat of the moment. What if—"

"What if I don't mind?" Ino said with obvious frustration in her voice. She tried to take the dive again, but Sakura moved away.

"I can't." She inched away even further, fixing her clothes.

"Why?"

"Because I love you, Ino!" Sakura covered her eyes. "I wouldn't be able to take it if sex became the only meaning in our relationship. Neither should it be the first step. I'm sorry. I mean w-what if we…start small. Baby steps, y'know. It gives you time to make a decision and…and it gives me time to…persuade you I guess? Is that the right word?"

For Ino, the rationality settled in first, then embarrassment, then panic. "Yes," she said, louder than she'd intended. "Okay." Was that the extent of her vocabulary?

Sakura smiled through her nerves. "Let's maybe…try it tonight? We could go out for dinner if you like. We can figure out what to do next afterwards."

"Like…like a date?"

"Y-yeah. Like a date. Unless you don't want to!"

"Okay, um, yeah, a date. Okay. Should I change?"

"Oh, no, no. Let's not do anything too fancy."

"Okay, sounds good! Fantastic actually. I'll just…gotta go to the bathroom," Ino replied before darting off.

"Er, yeah, no problem," Sakura called after her. "I'll just get ready in the kitchen. I have some s-stuff to…boil. Yeah."

At that moment, two matching ringtones went off simultaneously. Tenten and Temari looked at each other over the table, each hesitant to pick up their respective phones. "It's probably your two moms calling in a crisis," Temari snickered. She leaned over and checked the caller ID. "Yee-ep. It's them alright."

"Are they fighting?" Chika gasped.

"Oh trust me, that's probably the last thing on their minds." Tenten kicked her under the table.

"I'm going to take this in the kitchen," Tenten said. To Chikao and Chika she added, "I'm sure everything will be fine. Finish your dinner, okay?"

"I'll get this in the bedroom then," Temari replied. "Be good, kiddies!"

As soon as the door was shut, Temari flipped open her cell phone, eager for the news. "Hey Sakura! What's up?"

Sakura groaned from the other end, so loudly that Temari had to lift her ear off the device for a second before Sakura muffled her voice with a pillow. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! Fuck it all I'm so screwed. I don't know what to do anymore! I just…fuck I don't know if I made the right choice but I just fucking gave away the opportunity of my life. I want to cry, Temari. Do you hear me? I want to shed big fat fucking tears until my tear ducts shrivel up!"

"Woah, woah! Slow down, Sakura, I can barely hear you through that pillow you're gnawing on. Tell me what happened," Temari said. So much for the master plan, she thought.

"She kissed me!"

Silence.

"Well?" Temari nearly shouted, waving her arms impatiently. "Celebrate, buddy!"

"No. Okay. Look. Here's what happened."

Meanwhile, Tenten was hearing something along the same lines.

"What do I do, Tenten?" Ino whined. "I was so sure that I couldn't…possibly feel something for another woman."

Tenten leaned over the counter as she fiddled with the toaster. There was something fascinating about the grill and the way her finger fit into the slot. Taboo, perhaps? Even though it wasn't plugged in. "Well, I don't know, Ino. Love just kind of hits you. Why didn't you think you'd be compatible with women?"

Ino moaned at her memories. "My parents were super Catholic. No one talked about it. It was just kind of in our heads that it was wrong. But I mean, I did eventually experiment in college. Maybe that's what put me off. Because it really wasn't very pleasant. And I was mostly drunk so I've probably done a lot worse than I remember. I mean I've never been exposed to the real thing until I came here. I don't know what I'm saying anymore. Am I making sense? I just never thought…oh my god but it felt so…so…"

"Good?" Tenten offered with a smirk.

"Amazing," Ino sighed.

"I know what you mean. If you asked me a year ago that I'd be head over heels for another woman—such a ridiculous woman at that—I'd probably laugh, call you an idiot and never think about it again."

"Wait, what? Temari was your first? I didn't know that."

"Ah-ah, I didn't say that. I've had little relationships with girls before but it was all so…I don't know, bland? Even the sex. It was all so storybooky. Truthfully I had more fun being with my books. But Temari, she's just…so above everything else. Even when she pisses me off. Maybe that's the way you feel? If you can't put a label on it it's a good thing right?"

"But I'm scared," Ino said. "And I can't help but think: what if she didn't stop herself when she did? And the courage it took to do something like that despite how she felt about me."

"Yeah, she's pretty special," Tenten laughed. "Temari would never do that. Neither could I."

"What if I really do end up falling in love with her?" Her voice was quiet, contemplative. Tenten could almost see her burying her face with one hand.

"You're talking about this as if this was such a big dilemma."

"It is! Life-altering even!"

"What if she was a man? Would it be life-altering then?"

Ino closed her eyes and held her breath. She balled up her fist. Her reflection stared at her with guilty eyes. The what-if game, huh?

Tenten continued. "Make a list of the pros and cons! The only thing in the way of your happiness is yourself. Just loosen up, Ino, and for once just live by your most basic instincts. Allow yourself the privilege of happiness, okay? You don't have to grow old with her, but allow yourself to live in the moment with her. Know what I'm saying?"

Back in Temari's room. Temari was beginning to crave for something alcoholic. Or someone soft and all smart-ass. God, maybe they should just do it with or without the kids around. Who was she kidding? She was gonna be a terrible mother.

"Temari, are you listening?"

"Still here, hotstuff. I don't know, Sakura! It sounds good so I don't know why you're freaking out! I can never understand the way you think. You know that. You did a good thing. Something I definitely wouldn't do. Especially if it was the girl of my dreams under me. But it was a good thing, a highly respectable thing! It makes me admire you more. So don't worry about it. Being romantic has never been a weak link for you."

"But she's different, Temari. Somehow I don't think a dozen roses and a candlelit dinner is going to cut it."

"Why don't you do something you like for a change?"

"On our date? Seriously."

"She'll probably appreciate something less cliché," Temari said with a grin. "You hafta be spontaneous with girls like her and Tenten. They appreciate the extra distance we go for them. I mean, I do a lot of things to piss her off, but I know she still loves me and she knows I try. Besides, I think all of us can agree that you deserve something for yourself. Just be brave and be yourself, okay? No matter where you end up going."

Sakura thought about it. She kept thinking even as she hung up. She rifled through her memories for a romantic place for their first date. Something that is romantic but also spontaneous. Perhaps a dozen roses and a candlelit dinner aren't going to cut it. It's cliché after all. But all it takes is just a few minor adjustments. Sakura grinned at her brilliant plan. Now that Ino had time to think, she'd need more than a little bit of luck to persuade her.

Ino stood in the dark, rubbing one arm impatiently. She felt a breeze rustle across her summer dress. The ribbons swayed. The grass around her slapped her knees. Sakura led her hear after she stumbled out of her car. She'd been blindfolded the whole way. On one hand she felt a little empathetic for her daughter, but on the other she was beginning to get very pissed off. It was late and she didn't eat. Instead Sakura had locked herself in the kitchen for an hour then caught her on the couch with a blindfold. At first her heart raced like a teenager in love, anticipating something outside the scope of her imagination.

But another hour's car ride and ten minutes of standing in the dark can do wonders on one's bubbly feelings.

"Can I take this off now?" she said for the umpteenth time.

Sakura's laugher drifted from a few metres away. "Almost. It'll be worth it, I promise. You'll be impressed!"

"Does every girl have to go through this?" Ino said jokingly.

"Ah ha, no. To be honest I've never done this before, but it looks pretty good in my head."

"You're kidding. Well I've never had to be blinded for an hour and a half on a first date before so I believe you."

"I hope I'm not breaking any unwritten rules. I never knew there's a time limit for that," Sakura said. Ino could almost see the smile on her face. She unconsciously smiled at the picture in her head. The cold war had ended. Thank god. She loved how easy it was to make conversations now. She loved how easy it was to manipulate the other girl's expressions. There was no doubt in her mind that, if Sakura was a man, she'd never have hesitated for as long as she did.

"Any longer and it becomes bondage you know," Ino tried, making no effort to hide the coyness in her voice.

Sakura laughed nervously. "Well!" she replied, changing the subject as fast as she could, "almost done!"

Then the blindfold came off.

Ino stood, eyes wide, legs frozen, floating on a sea of green and yellow. "Wow," she whispered to herself. She raised her arms and spun around. Sakura watched her with a grin and motioned her towards a red and white picnic blanket laid out for two. It was all set up with a bouquet of roses on the side. The area, surrounded by tall grass, formed a little haven for the two of them. Above, the night was lit up by little orbs of light scattered between earth and sky. The lights floated around Ino's outstretched hands wistfully. There were so many suspended-like an open ocean of little lights. "Fireflies," she murmured, "it's beautiful." Beyond the lights, the speckled sky shone bright with stars. Once in a while a lonely bird would fly by while the crickets provided ambience.

But all was quiet outside the city drone.

"C'mon," Sakura said. She smiled and took her hand, leading her towards the picnic blanket. She had a single covered platter between two plates. She picked it up and said with a sheepish look on her face, "I didn't know how empty the kitchen was until today, so I'm going to apologize in advance because it's not very sexy at all."

Ino laughed. "What? Hamburgers?"

"Worse"—she uncovered the silver platter—"pizza." And sure enough, glistening with the firebugs was a round pizza with a perfect golden crust and lots of cheese.

"Honestly," Ino said, biting back her giggles, "this looks a lot more difficult than, let's say, spaghetti and meatballs."

"Let me be honest too then," Sakura said. "I didn't make this. I picked it up on the way here. I was actually having a panic attack in the kitchen. So now you know." She flashed a hopeful grin in consolation. Inside she was raging up a cold sweat, hoping she hadn't ruined her chances. "Oh, uh, I, um, didn't know what you liked so I ordered a different topping for each slice. They weren't very happy about that but, uh…too bad, I guess?"

"You're so cute, Sakura," Ino said with a chuckle. Sakura blushed. "And don't worry about it, this is nice, really. I've never had anyone go such lengths for me. So thank you. Besides, ever since I came here I haven't had any pizza. I couldn't afford it when I was living alone and when I moved in with you, you went out of your way to cook every day. So you shouldn't feel bad. I love pizza."

After dinner they sat together on the hood of Sakura's car, watching the stars and the fireflies.

"Mm, I haven't had pizza since I lived with that bastard. It brings back nice memories though."

"Ha-ha, it's been years for me too. My mom hates this stuff. She said it was a disgrace to Italian cuisine or something like that. Not to mention what it does to your thighs."

Ino laughed. "Once in a while, it's great though. Say, um, serious question. Did you ever find your biological parents?"

"My social worker told me they died or something. Car crash I guess. Either way it didn't matter. I had my mom and she was all I needed. After her death, you know, I cried a lot. For years I had these slumps where I'd just cry myself to sleep from time to time. I guess I just kind of forgot what it was like to be alone. Do you wanna hear something cliché?" she said with a smile. Ino nodded. Green eyes caught blue, and suddenly Ino couldn't find her breath. "After I met you, it was like my mom was with me again. I felt so alive, and so happy. I forgot what it was like to have a family. Just…thinking about you wanting to move out and live on your own with Chikao and Chika again…it devastated me. I tried to give you the kindness my mother gave me when she found me, but you came and gave me something to live for. Y'know if she was alive, she'd definitely like you."

"I'd probably like her too," Ino said. "Wouldn't it be nice to meet her. My parents, you know, we don't talk anymore. I was a disgrace I guess, for having being pregnant at 20. I was too much of a child, my father told me. I'd always been something of a princess until I had Chikao. And worse I wasn't married when I had him. We're supposed to be celibate until marriage but I was caught in the heat of a moment so…it happened. We were so in love then," Ino said, scoffing at the memory. "His parents died, but they left him a small fortune. He invested it and, for a while, we lived the high life. But…things didn't work out. We lost all of that. That's when he picked up his drinking habits and…now I'm here. With you."

"All it took was five years, huh?"

"A lot can happen in five years. Just look at Chika. It felt like just yesterday when I held her in my arms, smiling at the camera as the nurse took our picture," Ino shook her head. "I wish I knew you then."

"Well! On the bright side, we're here and we have many more years ahead of us to make up for every bad day we ever had. I mean look at these little fireflies. They're only have a few weeks more to live. Us…we've got more than I can calculate off the top of my head."

Ino giggled, the sound of her voice surprising even her in its degree of schoolgirl childishness. She cleared her throat. "You know, I'm glad that we can talk like this. I really…didn't know what to do. All I know is that I really, really hated the state we were in."

"Y-yeah, guess we have Temari and Tenten to thank, huh?"

"Those little monsters are probably driving the two of them insane. Purposefully too might I add."

A comfortable silence crept in.

Sakura stared at her boots. Then she spoke again, her voice soft and sombre. "I'm sorry. For the silence, I mean. I was scared. I really didn't know what I was going to do if you rejected me and walked out of my life. You, Chika, and Chikao. I don't know how long I can hold on to the life we have now, but I can't even imagine what will happen once it's over. What if you found a man and gave you a life I never could? What if you found my love disgusting, or you suddenly felt unsafe? What if you'd rather live alone raising two kids? It scares me to death. But it scares me more to see you suffer alone again. So I guess, what I mean is, if you do…one day…find a man who loves you as I do, then I will let go. If it makes you happy. I mean…if it's inevitable, then I won't fight to make you miserable. I don't know. Does that make sense?" She turned to face her with earnest eyes.

"Oh, Sakura." Ino quivered, staring back with watery eyes. "I wish I can say the same. This is so hard."

"A-ah! Please don't cry," Sakura said softly. "I already know that. But...it would be such an honour if you could give me the chance to love you. Maybe one day you'll feel the same? I meant every word I said, you know."

Ino leaned over and wrapped her arms around the other girl in a tight embrace. Hesitantly, Sakura wrapped her arms around her waist. They both relaxed. As they held each other under the moon, the stars, and the field of lightning bugs, the world stopped turning and things felt right for the first time in their lives. It was as if every year of grief vanished into the still air. "I could never find your love disgusting," Ino murmured into Sakura's shirt. She slowly pulled herself away. "I have to know, Sakura. Why me?"

Sakura didn't hesitate. She smiled, as if she expected the question from the beginning. "You're beautiful and you're amazing. The truth is…the second I saw you, Chikao, and Chika, I knew your smiles were the ones I want to spend the rest of my life protecting. You saved me from living life like a zombie. And as for what I love about you, I'd say everything but it wouldn't be enough for you. Instead I'll say that I love the way your eyes sparkle around the children, I love your gentleness, your firmness, and your strength. I love your voice and the way it welcomes me home. I love your sad days, your bad days, your good days, your best days. I guess I can make a list if that's what you want, but it'd take longer than you'd think. Days, weeks, months, years. Not because I can't come up with things to say but because I have too much to say. That makes sense right?"

Ino looked away. "You're such a cheesy person," she grumbled, but Sakura could see the smile tugging the corner of her mouth. "I bet you rehearsed that."

"For longer than I cared to count," Sakura replied.

Ino laughed again. She knew it wasn't true. They sat quietly, their bodies almost overlapping. The crickets chirped. The wind snaked through the field stealthily. The bouquet of roses sat on the dashboard inside. They weren't red roses, at least not all of them. It was a bouquet of colours, a beautiful array of shades. A shade of red for love and a shade for beauty, white for sincerity and yellow for happiness and promise of a new life ahead. There was a bit of purple for enchantment, a bit of black for infinity, a bit of blue for obstacles ahead. Peach for gratitude and orange for desire. Altogether were eleven roses, a guarantee, she explained, that the receiver was deeply and unconditionally loved. Who knows whether she made it up or whether it was a marketing ploy. Regardless, she did not deny the warm feeling and the rapid pounding of her heart. Just thinking about it again gave her butterflies.

"Ino," Sakura said suddenly.

"Sakura."

"If I…ask to kiss you again…could it, you know, serve as an answer to my question? No cheesiness I promise. I just want to know. Will you accept my love and let me kiss you again?"

This time, Ino felt fearless.

"Yes."

Author's Note: Hello again, everyone! Sorry this update took so long. I got caught up in work and games and TV and all. Started watching Glee (dontchu be hatin' now!) so I might do a Brittana story sometime. I have an unexplainable infatuation with Brittany. Even though she gets like one line every 38462764 episode. Yay for real lesbians!

Anyway, yeah. My writing has been going pretty slow. I'm only finished now after I promised a good friend of mine to have it posted by the time she arrives home from Vegas. So I worked at doubletime for 3-4 days and now it's out! A few hours late but nonetheless. It's my new year's present to you all, haha! It's like 2:30am now so I apologize with my tired rambling.

Further plans for this story…There will be ONE more chapter for Rouge and that will be the final conclusion. I've already thought about it a little bit and hopefully it will all work out. After the main story I have plans for short stories or one-shots (same diff) to go along with it. Those will probably happen along different parts of the storyline but there you go! R&R and keep expecting them stories (:

Be advised that I may or may not choose to include interactions of the sexual nature. I will likely have a warning at the top.

Oh yes and I forgot to mention the "magic bullet" Chikao found was a vibrator (if you couldn't guess) I'm not a hundred percent on it's existence but I do recall something by the name.