DISCLAIMER: If I owned Twilight, I would never have to worry about affording college tuition. But I don't. So I spend my time working on obscure scholarship opportunities.

Sorry this took so long. Two, three months or something like that. I've been catching some really bad breaks lately: life is just not being kind to me. I'm so sorry guys. Please keep reading. I won't give up on this story, I promise. Portions of every chapter have been written, I just need to finish all of them. XD

"I hate it when you stare..."

LEAH

"I wonder if we poke her like a jelly fish if she'll jiggle."

"I've tried that. She just groans and rolls over. It's not all that exciting."

"Then we'll have to get the ice bucket."

I rolled and swatted at the voices plaguing my comfortable stupor. If this was a dream it was a very annoying one and needed to be dispelled immediately. I had better dreams to get back to: ones with running, the smell of cinnamon, and infinite warmth.

"Leah…Leeeeeyyyyaaaahhhhh. It's time to wake up my sleepy friend." I mumbled something unintelligible and swatted again only to have my hand come in contact with a smooth round face with a prominent nose and lips too full to be those of my annoying little brother. In surprise, my eyes shot open and contacted with a pair of familiar chocolate brown eyes that I hadn't seen in a long time.

"RACHEL!" I squealed as I hadn't squealed for years and practically tackled her, throwing my arms around my old friend's shoulders. She sat on the edge of my bed dressed eccentrically as per usual while at the same time remaining utterly gorgeous in the process. Rachel had always had an off-kilter sense of fashion but she was by far one of the most beautiful girls I knew, aside from her twin sister of course whose beauty was equal to Rachel's, if not more conservative. Her hair was cut short with perfect aligned bangs around her face and the myriad of colors adorning her clothing should have given me a seizure but instead were remarkably pleasing to the eye.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Seth standing in my bedroom doorway, a big grin plastered to his face. I was smiling like a ridiculous idiot and I realized that I didn't normally smile like that. It must have been a pleasant sight for him because he had a wistful look on his face. Old Leah had been missing for a long time and we were both happy to see her return if only for a brief moment.

"I forgot! Jacob said you were going to be in town this week! It's so good to see you." I cried, pulling away. The stupid smile on my face didn't fade. Her face looked to be a mirror of mine. For a very brief moment I was reminded of how many times Rachel, Rebecca, Emily, and I had gathered in this very room and played games, done each other's make-up, put on fashion shows, and talked well into the wee hours of the morning. I missed those days of being a real teenager. I'd been much too serious for much too long.

"Likewise Lee! I kept expecting you to show up at WSU for college and you never did. You don't even realize how lonely it was without the whole gang together. But it doesn't matter now. I'm back for quite some time now so we have all the time in the world to catch up." Rachel gushed with a grin, taking hold of my hands and squeezing.

"Ha, uh, yeah. When did you get in?" The smile finally faded from my face as she mentioned college and I sheepishly shifted the conversation away from my current surroundings. I had once talked to Rachel about going to art school and working my way up the metropolitan ladder hopefully to bigger and better places. Only my immediate family and close friends knew of my closet artistic flare and I had kept it that way so that no one (especially my wolf brethren) would pity me for being stuck here and squandering whatever amount of so-called talent I might have. Rachel knew of course and she had expected me to join her in those few who pursued higher education, but after I grew dog ears and a tail that option kind of disappeared.

"Yesterday morning. I was really tired from the drive up, so I would have been by earlier, but neither of us is very good with lack of sleep." She chuckled gesturing to the tank top I wore which was a little off-center and the pair of sleep shorts that were much too short to wear in public. I'm sure that my hair looked quite the sight as well.

I laughed and grimaced jokingly. "No arguments there. So, since you're back, we should do something." I smiled vaguely and sat up a little straighter in bed, tucking stray strands of black hair behind my ears.

"What did you have in mind?" Rachel smiled slyly, raising a perfectly plucked brow.

"Your welcome home party is tonight, Rachel. I don't suppose you'd want to get dressed up for that." Seth noted from the doorway. Oh, my brother knew Rachel and I too well. It would be an automatic trip to the only thrift shop in La Push and Rachel would be off on her own little make-over session, having the time of her life playing paper doll with me. Not that I used to mind all that much. Back before she left I'd been a happy-go-lucky girl who was constantly trying to impress a certain Alpha I know. But now? The concept sounded less than appetizing. I didn't have anyone to impress anymore.

"Great idea, Seth. No wonder we kept you around for so long. Have I ever told you how brilliant your little brother is, Leah?" Rachel grinned and stood up, skipping to the doorway. "I'll let you get dressed Leah, and then we're going shopping!" Rachel was so excited. It had always been hard to say no to her. She was ridiculously charming and ridiculously brilliant. I sometimes wish I'd been more like her. I wish I'd been brave enough to leave this place when I'd had the chance. Then I wouldn't be in this whole mess.

I heaved a sigh as she disappeared into the living room and leveled a glare at my brother who still stood in the doorway with a smug look on his face. "I hate you." I muttered, throwing back the quilt and violently pulling open the doors to my closet, glaring at the clothes dripping from the wire hangers.

"Don't be so cynical, Leah. You'll have fun. It's Rachel, after all. It's not like she is going to let you get away with a single frown all day long. We'd all be happy to see Old Leah again, you know." He stated calmly, almost sympathetically, his arms crossed over his chest. Exasperated, I turned around where I stood to look at him, hands planted on my hips. I had originally planned on giving him a witty retort meaning something along the lines of 'go fuck yourself' but when I saw the look of pure innocence on my little brother's face, I couldn't bring myself to do it.

Instead I strode over, wrapped my arms around his shoulders and kissed the top of his head. "Maybe you're right. It's about time I had a little fun." I admitted, squeezing him once before moving past him into the bathroom. As I shut the door I heard a shocked voice announce to the entire house:

"Who are you and what have you done with my older sister?"

- - - - - - - -

A good twenty minutes later I had showered, blow dried, and dressed in my favorite pair of dark wash jeans and white t-shirt. I stepped out of the bathroom feeling refreshed and quickly retreated back into my room to review what I needed for an appropriate shopping trip: one that I hadn't indulged in for a very long time. Obviously I haven't really had a life the past couple of years. Evidently I needed some new hobbies; better yet, I might be better off reviving my old ones.

I sorted through the mess in my closet in search of my old leather purse. It was stuffed in the far corner, moth balls and old tissues crammed in its crevices. I fished it out, stuffing it with my wallet, cell phone, make-up, and house keys. And with that, I was ready for a shopping trip with one of my oldest and best friends. I trotted into the living room, a smile etching lines in my face and I stopped in the archway and announced my presence. "Let's get this show on the road, Ms. Technicolor Dream Coat."

"Finally. You'd think someone as speedy as you would learn to take a fast shower." Rachel quipped brightly, popping up from where she sat on my old seventies-style couch. It was then, with abrupt shock, that I noticed how much shorter Rachel was than I was. Did I get taller? It must have been a wolf thing because where Rachel and Rebecca used to tower a good three or four inches over me, now I was two or so inches taller than her. My doctor had informed me that I had stopped growing four years ago but apparently he was wrong. Granted, back then he didn't know that I was a mythical creature. Then again, neither did I.

"Yeah yeah, just keep walking short stop." I snickered and followed her out the front door to her car. It was a shiny black Ford Focus and a new one at that. My brows went up in surprise. Last I'd seen Rachel, she'd had a broken down old hatchback that it seemed even Jacob couldn't revive on a good day. Apparently old Dennis the Menace had finally puttered his last cloud of dying smog. "What happened to Denny? Did he finally kick the bucket?" I noted casually as I climbed into the new and improved Rachel Ride.

"Yep. A couple months ago actually. Which, altogether, was a good thing, considering it cost me seventy five a week just to fill him up. Nadine has been a fabulous substitute for our departed friend. But of course, Dennis will always be missed for the many good times we had in him. Like the time we got stranded between Port Angeles and Seattle on a college visit. Or the time that he popped a tire during that snow storm and we were stuck in that snow bank for three hours waiting for highway patrol to come find us. Good times. Good times." Rachel laughed and ignited the engine, taking off down the road at breakneck speeds. Silently I clutched anxiously at the seat, trying to ignore how quickly the houses and trees were passing us by. Jesus, I'd forgotten what a reckless driver Rachel was. Even Jacob wasn't as bad as her. Note to self: request chauffer.

Before I knew it (quite literally) we had arrived at Rachel's favorite thrift store on this good green earth, Pop's, and were perusing the racks and racks of gently (or not so gently) used clothing. It was five seconds flat before she found a mod sixties dress that I could never pull off but she most certainly could. Rachel could easily wear something that would look totally inappropriate on anyone else to a beach party and make it look like she belonged there. And she wasn't even a vampire. There is hope for the world.

"You don't think it's too retro?" She pondered, standing in front of the set of floor length mirrors by the changing rooms. I laughed incredulously and glanced at my pile of big fat NO's in the chair next to me.

"For you? Really Rachel?" I lifted an amused brow at her, rolling my eyes and thrumming through the tags of her pile of clothes. They were all too small for me now, but I couldn't help taking a peek: after all, I trusted Rachel's taste unequivocally.

"You're right. It's amazing. As per usual. I can always trust my faithful Pop's. Now, about you. Babe, you look hot, as usual, but everyone is going to be at my little shindig so we should really up your game. Seriously, Lee, have you dated at all lately? You're going to turn into a cat lady."

"Correction: dog lady." I noted, smiling internally at my little private joke. Ah, if only the pack were here to enjoy my humor. Then again, they might be too shocked at seeing nice Leah to catch anything I actually said. Rachel rolled her eyes, clearly not amused by my lack of a desire to flaunt my feminine side. "No, I haven't dated. And I really don't want to. There is seriously no one I'm interested in. Seriously, Rach. I'd rather just wear jeans. Besides, it's a beach party. Why bother getting all dressed up? You're the only one who can pull off sixties apparel and be deemed fashion goddess." I defended half-heartedly. Part of me wanted to look as beautiful as Rachel did all the time but part of me was also too stubborn to see the point in futilely dressing up for no one.

"Well, if you're not interested in dazzling anyone else at the party, why not do it for yourself. Every girl needs to feel gorgeous for no apparent reason. Jeez, Lee, you're like a permanent rain cloud. We've got enough of those around here. It's time to walk on a little sunshine. I…well, I know that getting over that prick Sam Uley was hard, but he didn't deserve you. So, let's show him what he's missing." Her mischievous grin was infectious. And that little prod made sense to me. Damn straight. I've been moping so long it didn't occur to me to slam my awesome in his face. Thank god that Rachel always knows how to cheer everyone up.

With that Rachel set on a mission to find the perfect outfit for me. I, personally, have always preferred simplicity in my wardrobe. I've always known how to rock natural beauty to its fullest. But Rachel, Rachel knows how to pull out all the stops and make any girl look movie star awesome in any outfit: even dish rags. She's done it, believe me. I watched with nostalgic amusement as she flitted about the store, gathering up things for me to try on.

While she continued on Mission Impossible, I sorted through the clothes we both had decided not to buy and reracked them out of courtesy (and boredom). Vaguely I glanced through the racks and racks of dresses, carelessness a tangible cloud around me.

Out of the corner of my eye I spotted something though. It wasn't particularly eye catching, but that was simply because it held the amount of simplicity I always put into my everyday wardrobe. It was a yellow summer dress, cotton linen spaghetti straps. Curiously I reached out and pulled it away from the rack, examining it at close range. Evidently Rachel had spotted my ogling and came over to stand next to me. "You found it!" She chirped happily, snatching the dress from my hands and running over to the shoe racks to find me some appropriate shoes to pair with it.

I laughed and moved to the jewelry case, examining with renewed interest the bobbles hiding in the second rate black silk. Nestled between a gaudy bumble bee broach and a set of rusting hoop earrings was a silver crescent moon pendant, Celtic patterns drawing circles in its surface. I vowed to come back to buy the little necklace.

Standing in front of the mirrors, I couldn't help smiling delightedly at my reflection. It was like a dream, seeing the old me standing there in a summer dress and gladiators. My legs were long and smooth, the dress providing the perfect amount of support for 'the girls' and complementing perfectly my skin tone was the warm yellow color. I actually looked, dare I say it, pretty. I hadn't felt truly pretty in so long, it was refreshing.

"See now. Doesn't it just feel good to dress up for you?" Rachel praised next to me, smiling at me through the mirror. I nodded, biting my lip shyly at my reflection. Who was the girl standing in the mirror? She seemed far away, like I'd been running towards her for a long time and was just now beginning to gain ground.

Satisfied, Rachel sat in the chair next to the dressing rooms and gazed at me in that calculating way that it seemed all the Black family was capable of. "What is this I hear about my little brother teaching you to drive?" She asked curiously, a suspicious brow going up. Shocked, I turned around and tried to look as innocent as I possibly could. Innocent. Me. Ha!

"That? Well, he kind of strong armed me into it. Says it'll be best for everyone if I learn to get around on my own. Pig-headed ass." I snorted, crossing my arms over my chest defiantly. It was really no new thing that I referred to Jacob as an ass around Rachel. We'd been doing it since we were fifteen.

"Well, the ass part was obvious, but seriously? Jacob, my brother Jacob, is teaching you to drive. Please don't kill him. He is the only little brother I have you know." She noted with a chuckle, standing up and beginning to fidget with my hair. I didn't feel the need to mention that I couldn't kill Jacob if I tried (even though I've wanted to on more than one occasion). Rachel wasn't up to speed on the whole wolf thing and we were all intent on keeping it that way. It was too bad. It was easier when everyone knew. I'm not the biggest fan of secrecy.

"Better him than you. We all know how well that driving lesson went." I replied smartly, glancing surreptitiously back at her with a skeptical smile.

"Okay, okay, I get your point oh silver tongued one. Still. I'm surprised he actually got you to do it. You're terrified of cars. That's about the only thing you're afraid of, Lee, as far as any of us can tell." She stated as she stepped back to examine her work on my hair. She'd successfully tamed it into submission. Congrats to Rachel, taming the untamable. "You look drop dead, Lee. Sam will want to burst into hysterical tears. And everyone else? Either they'll want to BE you or they'll want to sex you. No doubt about that." She grinned and positioned me again facing towards the mirrors.

I couldn't help but agree. I'm walking on fucking sunshine.

JACOB

Its official: I'm completely and totally fucked.

When I came to my sister's welcome home party I expected to see the pack, distract myself with copious amounts of food, and maybe laugh with the guys a little bit. I did not, however, expect to arrive only to have stupid fucking Paul imprint on my stupid fucking sister and ruin my fucking evening.

Fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck. Fuck.

"Hey, baby bro, do you know when the Clearwater's are supposed to get here?" Rachel asked as she skipped up to sit next to me on the log in front of the fire I'd built an hour ago. I snorted and poked a block of driftwood in the inferno.

"No. I'm not their keepers. Why?" I growled, grimacing into the flames with utter distaste. Armageddon had come early this year. Who'd have thought?

She squirmed in impatience eyes scanning the road for Sue's truck. There was a mysterious excitement to my sister's actions that put me on edge. Obviously she and Leah had been up to something all day: she'd come home happier than she'd left and since meeting Paul she'd been utterly off the walls. She bit her lip in an anxious way, glancing around with mild interest at the other partygoers, mainly the males. I spotted her even shoot a sparing but annoyed look at Sam who seemed utterly at ease despite the waves of hatred rolling off my sister. Ironic that she'd greeted Emily with as much enthusiasm as Rachel was capable of, and that is a lot.

Her anxiety was put at ease as I spotted Sue's truck round the corner and park in the parking lot. The Clearwater's all escaped the confines of the SUV and that was when I saw her.

Old Leah. It was like a dream. The smile on her face was totally infectious and brighter than the yellow dress she wore. I'd been too young to notice or care about the beauty of Old Leah but now? Shit. We'd all forgotten Leah's smile: her real smile. My sister leapt from where she sat next to me and bounded towards Leah who embraced her wholeheartedly. Laughing and giggling, they trotted arm in arm down the sand, talking in whispers to each other as they went.

While the rest of the partygoers continued to talk as if nothing happened, I could feel the rest of my pack stiffen and gaze in awe at the she-wolf settling herself across from me at the fire. Leah Clearwater was smiling. Holy Flying Fuck Monkeys, Leah Clearwater was really and truly smiling as if she didn't have a fucking care in the fucking world. It felt like everyone had been swiftly kicked in the head. With a quick glance around I could see that every one of my brothers' jaws were dropped to the sand, confusion and apprehension swimming through them faster than the crash of the waves along the beach.

Even Sam seemed totally flabbergasted. Shit.

It wasn't long before someone put on some music and people were dancing. Rachel hoisted Leah up for a dance, the two girls laughing and mouthing to the music as if they hadn't been completely separated for years. I couldn't help the smile that pulled at my lips, watching them as if they were little children again. But of course, the dance was cut short when Paul decided to steal my sister away for a dance. And another. And another.

Leah had seated herself again across the fire from me and was toying with a lock of her dark hair. She looked untroubled for the first time in forever. Her eyes were bright and unlined with worry wrinkles as she gazed contentedly into the flames. If I didn't know better, I would have thought I was looking at a completely different person. There was no trace of the queen bitch sitting there on that log. She looked like a happy healthy beautiful twenty year-old girl. One who should have been off at college having the time of her life, not here taking care of her wayward little brother and killing vampires with her werewolf brethren. Pity surged through me and I understood why she might hate her situation even more than everyone else did, why she was so spiteful and vindictive, why she never wore a smile like she did now. Her entire future had been yanked from her thanks to the moon and the vampires. She had lost everything.

And me? I was bitching and whining about a girl who didn't even love me the way I loved her. God I'm pathetic. No. I'm not going to think about Bella. Not now. Tonight was supposed to be fun, a distraction (I've been moping around doing nothing enough lately as it is), not another opportunity to pine amidst a big crowd of my friends.

"Jacob. Jacob! Hello! Baby brother. Do something!" I whirled around in bewilderment. My sister and Paul stood behind me, swaying to the slow song playing on a boom box not fifteen feet away.

"What?" I asked in confusion, shaking my previous thoughts from my brain.

"Do something! Before he gets over to her!" Rachel implored, jerking her head back over the fire. I followed her gaze to where Leah sat innocently talking with Seth. My eyes traveled over to Sam who was slowly making his way over to her. My senses went on red alert and without warrant I stood up and moved faster than lightning to stand in front of the girl before Sam could.

"Hey, Leah, want to dance?" I asked with a cocky grin, very aware of Sam as he came to a stop not a foot from me. I could almost feel the glare form on his face. Part of me couldn't help but love the satisfaction I felt in the jealousy rolling off him. I had a hard time not laughing at the look of complete shock on Leah's face as well. And Seth? Well Seth just looked confused as usual.

"With you? Have you gone absolutely completely stark raving mad? Did someone put something in your drink? Did Rachel drug you?" Leah asked with complete sincerity, eyes wide. I could see, however, that she knew how close Sam was to us and that she was not too keen on speaking to him at the moment. She looked tense, the light in her face vanishing a little by his very presence. A small part of me squirmed unpleasantly, clearly unhappy that Sam had affected her happy demeanor so easily.

"Oh shut up, Sunshine and Daisies and just dance so that my ego doesn't completely deflate." I sneered playfully, holding out my hand to her. She glanced uncertainly between my hand and Sam standing close by before seemingly making a decision. Tentatively, she placed her thin fingers in my palm and I hoisted her off the log with ease, toting her away from the circle and into the throng of dancers swaying back and forth in the sand.

"Er…thanks for that." Leah mumbled grimacing, casting her eyes surreptitiously over at Sam who seemed to be fuming with more vigor than usual. I couldn't help but laugh. Hell has frozen over. The queen bitch is actually thanking someone for something. Well isn't today just a day of new experiences.

"No problem. Figured that you wouldn't want to be pestered by He-Who-Must-Royally-Fuck-Up. Besides, if I didn't, I think Rachel would have murdered me for not saving your ass from his goo-goo eyes." I noted with amusement as she hesitantly place her hands at my shoulders. Similarly I placed my hands at her waist, uncertain about how comfortable she was in this situation. It was apparent to both of us that I was not a guy she'd have picked to dance with on a regular day. For the most part though, she seemed to be relieved to be out of Sam's range for the time being.

"Goo-goo eyes? What the hell are you babbling about, Lassie?" She glared up at me in confusion, her thin brows pulling together. Despite the fact that she looked happier than ever, it couldn't erase the permanent worry lines etched between her eyes. Like a phantom uni-brow. Now there's a joke you don't get to use every day.

"Are you blind, Leah? When you got here everyone shit their pants. You are not the same Leah that ripped Paul a new one last week. This Leah—" I paused and lifted my hand to gesture to her thin athletic frame, "This is a girl we haven't seen years." I stated blatantly raising my own brows as if to emphasize my point. The glare on her face was replaced with a softer more uncertain gaze and I witnessed again a sliver of vulnerable Leah that I thought hadn't existed. It was unnerving. Leah was impenetrable, invulnerable, undeniable: Leah Clearwater was a force to be reckoned with.

"That's stupid. Nothing's changed. The pack and the rest of those knuckleheads can go dunk their heads in a toilet for all I care. You included." She snapped, casting away the vulnerability like it was a used tissue. For a moment, I thought I'd completely imagined it.

"Ouch, Leah. And I just saved your ass. What a nice way to repay me." I sneered rolling my eyes.

"You saved my ass? Yeah, that'll be the day. I can take care of myself, Jacob Black. Or haven't you noticed?" She retorted expertly, cocking her head at me challengingly.

"I save your sorry ass all the time, she-wolf. I'm surprised you've still got all your limbs, what with the trouble you get yourself into. You're like Bella. A magnet for trouble." Apparently this wasn't the right thing to say because her expression went from playful to murderous in a split second. Without warning she jerked away and made her way across the sand toward the line of waves crashing against the rocks. Unthinkingly, I trotted after her, staring incredulously as she kicked off her shoes and dove into the tumult, her head breaking the surface of the waves a few seconds later.

I heard a terrified shriek from behind me and I whirled around in bewilderment to see Rachel running towards Leah at breakneck speed. "Leah Clearwater, what have you done to that adorable dress?" She squealed. Her expression looked frustrated but her voice made it clear that she was laughing. She too dove into the waves after Leah, soaking her unorthodox dress and grinning with pure mirth as she tackled Leah. They were playing like little kids in the surf, basking in a friendship that they'd known for so long but hadn't been around lately to share.

"I'm getting in on this." Paul said suddenly next to me, peeling off his t-shirt and running into the water. The protective brother in me seethed as he scooped up Rachel and tossed her again into the water. She got up laughing and tackled him, riding piggy back style on his back. Leah grinned and splashed them playfully and inexplicably my anger vanished and I too peeled off my t-shirt and sprinted towards the water, diving into the cold waves unabashedly.

When I resurfaced, wiping salt water from my eyes I was unexpected bombarded by splashes of water. Opening my eyes I spotted Leah and Rachel both making a combined attack on me, giggling madly as I practically drowned in the sea salt. Growling as only a werewolf can I set my target and bounded, my legs only slightly hindered by the pull of water ebbing and flowing around my thighs. I leapt for Leah, tacking her to the sand, the water just barely flowing back and forth over her feet. Rachel and Paul were laughing behind us, still frolicking thoughtlessly in the surf.

I glanced back down at Leah who was otherwise pinned to the ground. My hands were planted on either side of her head and I hovered over her precariously. She looked back up at me uncertainly, the unadulterated glee a forgotten shadow on her features. She appeared breathless, as if trying very hard not to think. Something about her expression stirred the pit of my stomach. Her short black hair splayed out in a dark halo around her head and her eyes were bright even in the dim light. There was something fierce and exciting about her eyes. A sudden rush of adrenaline ran through my veins and I was suddenly hyper aware that one of my knees was between her legs and half my torso was pressed against hers. She looked wild, untamable.

For a long moment we stayed like that, suspended in a reality I can only think of as surreal. Contradictory, I know, but that is the only way I can think to describe it. And then, abruptly, we were pulled from that reverie. Seth called out to us and slowly, reluctantly I disengaged myself from her, holding out my hand to help her up. She received the help gratefully, seeming to be a little unsteady on her feet.

With that we walked back to the fire to dry off. I didn't think about Bella anymore that night.

LEAH

I couldn't stop thinking about it. Last night. Even now as I struggled to learn the art of breaking, turning, and speeding up at seemingly the same time. It made absolutely no sense to me whatsoever.

"Leah, you just need to relax. You're too tense." Jacob noted next to me in the passenger seat. He was gripping the seat of his Rabbit eerily tightly, telling me that he was clearly as nervous about my driving as I was. I nodded vigorously, though I'm sure it didn't encourage him anymore than it did me. Cautiously I pressed my foot on the gas. With success I was able to ease forward in the little parking lot we'd located but as I moved in for the turn I went too fast and came to a screeching halt in fear.

"Whoa whoa, okay, we need to take a moment I think. Turn off the engine. Please." Jacob's tone was imploring and at any other time I might find it completely infuriating. But, as it was, I was too paranoid about the death trap I was controlling to care. "You're more skittish than usual, Leah. You need to cool your jets or we'll both end up wrapped around a tree and I've had enough of laying in bed waiting for my wolf healing to seriously kick in. What's the deal, pip squeak?" He leveled a glare at me as I put the car in park and turned off the engine, my hands shaking uneasily as I went.

I grimaced and rubbed my sweaty palms against my bare knees, hesitant to tell him the reason behind my heightened anxiety. "Sam and I had an interesting conversation after you and Rachel left. Also, did Paul seriously imprint on Rachel?" That reason alone should have disturbed me enough to drive Jacob's car off a cliff: my friend, my old and beloved friend, her 'soul mate' was PAUL? I think I just threw up a little. But of course, to add to that chaos, Sam had a pleasant conversation with me last night. As if I didn't already have enough problems.

"Yeah. Calamity, I know. But don't change the subject. What did Sam want to talk about?" Jacob's eyes were narrowed at me and I immediately remembered the calculating way that Rachel had looked at me while we were shopping yesterday. I always felt like the Black's were capable of seeing through every wall I put up and it scared the shit out of me: I know, fearless Leah is afraid. But believe it or not, I am in fact human and I do in fact have fears. And I swear to god, if they could truly see right through me, it would be the death of me.

I fidgeted and let out a low growl, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning my head back into the seat. "He wanted to talk about…being friends again. More or less." I couldn't help snorting. His use of the word friend is clearly very loose.

"So what did you say?" Jacob asked curiously, raising a skeptical brow. I'm sure he thought I cussed him out and lit him on fire. I didn't. But I was tempted. Very tempted.

"I told him we were never friends. Which was true. We'd never been friends in high school. It went from flirt to relationship really fast." My brow furrowed at my own words. I'd begun to realize something from our little conversation last night. Sam and I had really NEVER been friends. Ever. Not even a moment. Which, I imagine, was how Bella and Edward were. Love at first sight, and all that razzmatazz. But, still, it wasn't the same. When I was a kid, I always imagined I'd be the type of girl to find a guy, be his friend, his tomboy girl friend, the kind of girl that your parents would never have to worry about you being alone with in your room because she was basically unisex, and then I'd fall for him. That wasn't the case for Sam. Not at all. I'd been pretty, popular, charming, and he'd come after me like some prize to be won.

Leah Clearwater was no prize to be won. I make my own damn choices thank you very much.

I felt Jacob's eyes contemplating my expression but I didn't look up at him. Instead, I focused my irises on the smooth curve of the steering wheel as if the faint wrinkles in it would give me the answer to all my silent questions. When he finally spoke, I couldn't help a tiny flip of pleasure in the pit of my stomach. "I'm proud of you. I'm guessing you didn't rip him to bloodied ribbons then?"

"You still have an Alpha, don't you?" I stated bitingly, finally rolling my eyes at him and looking up at the ceiling of the Rabbit in exasperation. "You're just loving this, aren't you? Watching me suffer over the exploits of a clueless ex-boyfriend and struggling to control this metal death trap you call a mode of transportation. Keeps you from focusing on how much your life is royally coming to a close." I turned my head to look at him, raising a brow in perfect sincerity. While my words always contained an edge of sharpness to them, my tone was less malicious than usual. My mother had been told, according to Billy, that Jacob had been otherwise locked in his room in his best Hamlet fashion most of the past week and a half. Jeez, he was like a five year-old who didn't get the candy bar they wanted while shopping at the grocery store.

He laughed, leaning his head back as well and gazing his depthless brown eyes out the windshield. "Yes. Yes I am. A scared shitless Leah is probably the most entertaining thing this side of the rocky mountains." I wanted to wipe that impish grin off his face then and there. However, feeling rather charitable today, I reigned in my anger and took a deep breath, counting backward from ten in my head. "You've been mysteriously calm lately. It's a little creepy. We're all waiting for you to explode."

I rolled my eyes, gripping the steering wheel and scratching lines in it with my fingernail. "I decided to take a page out of anger management. I might not be such a bitter bitch if I started acting like it. Then maybe everyone would stop hating me and just really dislike me." I reasoned sarcastically, glaring out the window at the pavement of the empty parking lot we'd been practicing in.

"Leah, I don't hate you. I really dislike you, but I don't hate you." He joked. I felt his arm move around my seat. Were it not for the fact that there was a headrest behind my head, I would have thought he was trying to cop a feel. But this is Jacob we're talking about. He could never be that smooth.

"You're funny." I sneered, pulling my knees up to my chest.

"I'm serious though, Leah. We don't hate you. Yeah, you can be a bitch and you're hard to deal with, and you talk too much, and you're stubborn, and loud, and whiney, and---"

"You got a point there, Jake?" My brief moments free of anger vanished and I felt my nails dig into the skin of my palms as I clenched my fists. Boy, Jakey, you really know how to make a girl feel better.

He sighed exasperatedly and pinched the bridge of his nose. "The point is, you're not all that bad. We know that your life is fucked and that you weren't always a heinous bitch. I guess we all just kind of wish Old Leah was back, you know. That's who we saw, last night. That's why Sam wanted to be friend's with you." He reasoned, giving me a look of innocence that could give Seth a run for his money. I'd have to let him know that he needed to up his game I he wanted to remain the sweetest kid on the reservation.

I sighed, unwilling to admit that he was dead on right. Looking out the window, it wasn't hard to imagine my life if I were a better Leah. I could see myself getting along with my brothers, getting a job, making new friends. Maybe I'd even get to resurrect my art. Maybe my brother would be proud to have me as a sister and god forbid, maybe, just maybe, I'd be able to get a goddamned guy. Despite the fact that I'm naked around guys pretty much twenty-four seven, I haven't gotten even a single kiss on the cheek in months.

"Earth to Leah. Time to get out of your fantasy world." Jacob laughed, waving his sausage fingers in my face. I slapped his hand away, shooting him an icy glare. He merely laughed once more and gave me a thoughtful look. "What were you daydreaming about?"

I shrugged, running my fingers along the stereo controls. "My future. I mean, I'm not going to college any time soon, so clearly it's about time I made the best of it. I guess I could get a job, make some new friends. If I get lucky, I'll find some guy who won't totally find me repulsive. Let's face it, I'm not going to imprint. I'm never gonna have a real family. But I can try, you know." I turned my head to look at him only to come in contact with quite possibly the most befuddling expression he's ever worn. Concern wrote itself across his sharp features. He shook his head, sighing. His gaze was slicing through my skin again, my paper thin shields yielding to the Black intuition. "Stop looking at me like that. Don't stare at me like you pity me. I don't want to be pitied. I'd rather be hated than pitied, Jacob Black."

"No, Leah, that's not--" I cut him off with a wave of my hand.

"Don't, Jake. I don't want to hear it. Consider this lesson officially over." I snapped, unbuckling my seatbelt and launching myself out of the Rabbit. I heard Jacob's muffled protests but ignored them as I kicked off my flip flops and took off running. My skin began to vibrate, heat pulsing through me and before I knew it I'd exploded into a ball of furious fur. My jeans and t-shirt lay strewn in ribbons across the blacktop behind me as I bounded straight into the forest, disappearing into the brush without a look back.

A/N: okay, I originally intended this to be much longer but honestly I don't know where I originally intended to take it and frankly I just want to get started on chapter four. This chapter and that one are really the hardest I've had to get through: the rest are basically already written. I'm so sorry this took so long. I've just had a lot of really crappy shit going on in my life and writing has been difficult. I hope I can get out chapter four before my winter break is up though. Once I finish 10 things, I'm going to crank out a Star Trek fanfic because I do love me some Star Trek. So be prepared dear hearts. Yours always,

double0seven