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Should've Said No

Lily happened to be in a good mood when she walked into the Head Girl's suite Wednesday afternoon. She had just aced a test in Transfiguration (which was far from her best subject), and Amos Diggory, her boyfriend, had promised that he would go for a walk with her around the lake. As she wandered around the room, humming softly and picking up a stray sock here and there, a folded note that sat in the center of her pillow caught her eye. Her humming stopped as she picked up the parchment and read it.

What you do with this is your business, but I suggest you go look behind the fourth floor tapestry of six knights hunting.

Lily reread the single sentence several times, trying to figure out who might have written it. It wasn't James and his friends; she could recognize any of their handwriting because of all their detentions and pranks, not to mention all of the annoying letters James sent in an attempt to ask her out.

Eventually though, curiosity won over, and Lily left the room. She took several shortcuts, and was standing in front of the tapestry in a matter of minutes. The embroidery on the huge piece of cloth was really quite extraordinary; the angry boar's fur looked so realistic that Lily felt like if she touched it, it would turn around and drive its huge tusk through her stomach.

Lily reached out a hand and quietly pushed the tapestry aside. Amos was there, wrapped up in the arms of Alexa, a shapely blonde Ravenclaw fifth-year that was building quite a reputation for herself. Alexa moaned in pleasure as his mouth teased hers and his hands roamed her body.

Lily must have made some sound without meaning to, because Amos surfaced and turned to see her. "Lily—"

But Lily had already turned and ran back to her Head Girl's suite before he had a chance to make excuses.

When she got there, she sat down on the soft couch and buried her face in her hands. How long? She thought. How long has he been doing this? Lily felt something warm and wet touch her fingertips, and when she looked, she discovered that she was crying. "Damn…" She sat up straight and wiped the tears off her cheeks. "Lily, stop," she said sternly to herself. "He's not worth it." Hoping to distract herself, she grabbed her Charms book off the table and found the lesson that they were going to do tomorrow.

It's strange to think the songs we used to sing
The smiles, the flowers, everything…is gone
Yesterday I found out about you
Even now just looking at you…feels wrong
You say that you'd take it all back, given one chance
It was a moment of weakness and you said yes...

Lily had read the lesson and mastered the spell last night, so instead of listening to Flitwick, she watched Amos's brown curls, two rows in front of her, and how they bobbed with every small movement.

She'd been avoiding Amos all morning, but she would have bet every Galleon that she owned that he would corner her after class. She wished there was another way to do it—she hated public confrontation—but she knew that he would twist the story if she didn't make sure everyone heard.

It's odd, Lily thought, this is the end. No more sweet smiles, no more flowers with cute notes, no more loving words whispered in my ear…it even feels wrong just looking at him.

The bell rang, and everyone scrambled for their books. Lily walked into the corridor with her two best friends, Nicole and Erin, and found Amos waiting for her.

"Lily, can we talk? In private?"

"If you want to talk, then talk."

"Please? Can we go somewhere else?"

"No, either start talking or let me go to lunch." All other conversation had stopped. Everyone was watching Lily and Amos, even her friends had vanished into the crowd; they knew that no matter how little Lily liked it, all attention had to be on her and Amos right now. It was the only way to minimize false rumors.

He took a step towards her and looked straight into her green eyes. Lily stared right back, trying to not be distracted by his beautiful dark brown—Focus, Lily! "I'm sorry about last night. I didn't want you to see that."

"So if I hadn't seen it, if I'd remained in my little fantasy world where I was the only girl in your life, that would have made it okay?" Lily barely managed to keep her voice steady

He fidgeted. "Well…no. Look, I'm really sorry; I take back everything I did—"

"You can't take something like this back, Amos."

"Just give me another chance, one more chance, Lils. I promise it won't happen again. She just…she grabbed me and pulled me back there and before I could push her away, she'd turned my brain into mush."

"Now you're going to blame this on her? That's really low."

You should've said no, you should've gone home
You should've thought twice before you let it all go
You should've know that word, 'bout what you did with her
Would get back to me…
And I should've been there, in the back of your mind
I shouldn't be asking myself why
You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet...
You should've said no, baby and you might still have me

"You should've pushed her away the second you realized what she wanted. You should've told her you had a girlfriend. You should've given a second thought to what you were doing and realized it was wrong.

"Another chance? No. In my book, boys get one chance, and if they screw up, that's it. You don't get another chance. I was your girlfriend, Amos. You should have thought about me, about how what you were doing would make me feel. You should've known that I would find out. Gossip travels fast around here." Her voice quavered a little bit, and Lily took a few breaths to steady it. She couldn't cry now.

"You shouldn't be begging my forgiveness, because you never should have cheated on me. You should've said no, 'cause if you had, you'd still have me."

You can see that I've been crying
And baby you know all the right things…to say
But do you honestly expect me to believe
We could ever be the same...
You say that the past is the past, you need one chance
It was a moment of weakness and you said yes...

Amos's next question was so quiet that Lily barely heard it. If anyone in that corridor had been talking, she would've missed it.

"Did you cry?"

"You know what? I did. And I'm mad at myself because of that. You don't deserve those tears. I'm mad at myself for letting you hurt me enough to make me cry. But," Lily's voice acquired a sarcastic undertone, "don't worry, I'm done crying.

"And I'm done with you."

"Baby, please…can't we pretend like it never happened? It's in the past, forgive and forget, right?"

Lily forced out what she hoped was a condescending laugh. "Damn, you know just what to say, don't you? How many times have you done this, Amos? Do you really think we could be the same, just act like it never happened? I would always see you cheating on me. You shattered my trust, and no, you don't get it back. Maybe someday as a friend, but never as a boyfriend. No, Amos, we're done."

You should've said no, you should've gone home
You should've thought twice before you let it all go
You should've know that word, 'bout what you did with her
Would get back to me…
And I should've been there, in the back of your mind
I shouldn't be asking myself why
You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet...
You should've said no, baby and you might still have me

Lily turned and elbowed her way through the crowd. Amos just stood there for a moment, staring dumbly at the place where his ex-girlfriend had disappeared, before readjusting his bag on his shoulder and turning down the corridor in the opposite direction.

James, who had observed the whole scene from in the crowd, watched Diggory's back retreat down the corridor with an expression of mixed shock, respect, and smugness on his face. Hell hath no fury like that of Lily Evans scorned, he thought. Try as he might, James couldn't feel sorry for him. The idiot had brought it upon himself by thinking no one would find out and tell.

Smirking, James turned and followed the crowd downstairs to lunch.

After lunch, Amos caught up with her in the entrance hall, just as she was putting her foot on the lowest stair of the huge marble staircase. "Lily, please…"

She stopped, her back to him and one foot on the stair. Everything he had said in the corridor after class came rushing back and Lily considered forgiving him. Just this once.

"It was just once, Lils. One little mistake. People make mistakes, right? No one's perfect."

Lily didn't answer for a moment. A part of her was screaming "Yes! Forgive him!" but the sensible part of her knew better. It took every ounce of willpower she possessed to respond rationally. "No, no one's perfect, but this is not a little mistake. A mistake would be tripping and landing in a compromising position. A mistake would be letting her flirt with you because you were too clueless to realize that she was flirting. It's not a mistake to go snog random girls like there's no tomorrow."

I can't resist…before you go, tell me this
Was it worth it…
Was she worth this…

She took a few steps up the stairs, then stopped and turned back to look at him. "I can't resist asking: was Blondie worth this?" Amos avoided her gaze and didn't reply.

"You should've thought about that before you said yes."

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Thanks for reading! Next one will be "I Won't Say I'm In Love" from Disney's Hercules.