Set after Lies My Parents Told Me and goes AU from there and takes a darker turn. Also, I changed some of the backgound to fit my story, you will noice the changes as you read. The church scene never happened in 'Beneath You', but Buffy did learn of Spike's soul through one of his crazy ramblings in the basement. Also, Dawn has just recently turned eighteen. By the way, Buffy still thinks Spike is hopelessly in love with her.

Disclaimer: I own nothing...unfortunatly. :(

Prologue:

It wasn't supposed to be this way. I hadn't wanted to hurt her that night in the bathroom. It was all her fault, really it was. Had it not been for her bloody mixed signals, it never would have happened. It was always no at first, and not very long after that, she was beating me senseless and shaggin' me into oblivion.

She was using me, to make herself feel, I knew that, of course, hell she even admitted it. She had told me that she believed it was real...for me. Her on the other hand felt nothing in return. The damn bitch. But when she saw me and the demon girl getting' it on, it hurt her. Or she was jealous. Either way, I obviously did mean somethin' to her. Right? So I had to show her again, make her feel it. My love for her, that is.

How the bloody hell was I supposed to know that this was the one time that no actually meant no? And with a whole bottle of bourbon in me, well, I didn't catch on right away. But when I finally sobered up and realized what the hell I was doin', I stopped myself. I was horrified and disgusted with myself. I almost did what I had always detested anyone doing that to any woman. It was wrong, and I knew that.

If I had never gotten this sodding chip in my head, none of this would ever had happened. I would have been able to give that Slayer exactly what she deserved to begin with. And she never would have had a chance to turn me into the pathetic ponce I am now.

So when I left her house, I planned on doing just that.

Only, it didn't exactly go according to plan. I should have known. None of my plans ever actually go to way I like.

So, here I am, stuck with this sodding, miserable soul, all because I hadn't been in the right frame of mind when I told that demon shaman what I wanted. And the worst part of it...not even a good shag could shake it loose. And I hate that bitch of a slayer even more now that I ever had before. Besides the guilt of over a hundred and twenty years of killing, the only other thing this newfound soul has taught me, is that I was never truly in love with the Slayer at all. Bloody fabulous! Oh, and on top of that, I still have the soddin' chip!

So why the hell am I back here in Sunnyhell, helpin' out the Slayer, of all things? I have no bloody clue. Especially, when nobody wants me here. The Nibblet even threatened to set me on fire if I came near her sister again.

Didn't know the Bit had it in her to be so damn scary. Proud of her for that, I am. Always did love the Nibblet, not in the way I thought I loved her sister, but still loved her, nonetheless. Her and their mum were only ones I truly cared for, always treated me like a man, never like a thing. I think maybe that's why I'm back here, to make sure the Little Bit is looked after properly...only, she ain't so little anymore, is she? When did this happen? Apparently, when I was screwin' her sister.

How the bloody hell did I not notice her, before? Bloody gorgeous, she is. With her long dark hair, big, beautiful, brilliant blue eyes, and legs that go on for days. What the hell am I thinkin'? She's my Nibblet! Besides, she hates me now, anyway. Not that I blame her, she has every right to hate me.

But, damn, how she's changed...

A/N: What do you think? Should I continue?