A/N: This is my first attempt at AU in a multi-chaptered story. I tend to think too much about vampires and their increased senses so I really honestly tried not to get too crazy with it.

WARNING: I'd like to give fair warning right now. This story is rated M, this is real M. There isn't just sex--incredibly hot, amazing sex--there's questionable consent, kidnapping, stalking and anyone who doesn't like opression to women ie. abusive relationships and submission, you should NOT read this. There's NO RAPE or beating for sport, this ISN'T S&M or BDSM this is just a vampire and human story with mature and adult themes. Because not every story is happy and romantic.

So, I'd like to introduce you to my love child and the fruit of my four month writing binge.

April

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Edward

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There is something to be said about life. In the grand scheme of things humans look at the world in a distant astral belief, one in which life is wondrous and welcoming and beings in the heavens look down upon them. Those humans live their lives according to the law of man and humanity which they share with others. Some feel the need to deviate from their chosen path and become something different—something more.

Others look at the world philosophically. The world is not a world, but an earth which beings inhabit and live on. There is a molten center, boulders and rocks that give a hint at what lies beneath the surface, and that as creatures we will one day be apart of the ever expanding marsh lands.

I myself chose to look at the world as something less than meaningful, but more as a fluke in the solar system that somehow created the concoction of Neanderthals and life.

For a century I had pondered the meaning of life but never really came to a conclusive ending. Even a being such as myself who survives on habit and melancholy had to have some reason for existing, even if it was slight.

I often watched humans interacting with each other, how they masked their disgust with an old friend or shuffled away from confrontation, some running head on. Even if one human was different, they were all the same. There were one hundred carbon copies for each human. Maybe humans knew that they would die—of course they did—but they never accepted it until they were on their last leg. Younger humans viewed life as an annoying burdensome thing, through puberty they often wondered what their purpose on earth was.

They had none.

The female waitress lifted my untouched coffee cup. A waft from the white ceramic dish blew my way and a rumble began in my chest too low for her to hear. The girl knew better than to stay around me, and left to dump the coffee in the back, wondering all the way why I bothered to order if I didn't drink.

I'd been in this coffee house everyday for the last two months unconditionally. It was ridiculous, absolutely preposterous, but here I was once again staring out at the street and watching each passersby walk down the busy streets. Rain began to fall lightly and like ants they scattered.

For half an hour I listened to the bustling coffee house and watched the scarce populace that ran down the sidewalks desperately to escape the drops. A pale yellow umbrella strolled leisurely down the street covering a young woman's face.

My whole body sat up straight and I concentrated hard on the body walking slowly over the cracks in the concrete. Her small feet almost tiptoed over a gash in the sidewalk and when the heel of her shoe caught in a smaller fissure she stumbled and lowered her umbrella just enough for me see her eyes wincing closed and opening slowly. I sighed audibly.

The girl placed her umbrella back onto her right shoulder, obscuring her face from me once more. I watched her legs walk down the street, the sun dress wrapped around them. When the top of her umbrella was gone from my sight, I stood and left a vague tip.

The rain against my skin made no impact on me as I walked across the street and followed down the same path as she had gone. I was twenty yards behind when I saw her again. She was stopped on the pathway and talking to some tall boy with light blonde hair and a grin plastered across his face. I turned and focused my eyes on the board full of flyers in front of me.

"Did you reserve your invite to Jess's party yet?" the boy asked.

"No, not yet," her voice was quiet, shy.

"Yeah, me neither. In all honesty I don't even know if I should go. I mean, we just broke up and I don't really wanna go alone…."

"I'm sure Tyler or Eric will accompany you."

"Well, yeah, I know, but I was kind of hoping that if you weren't busy…" the boy trailed off and his mind became a swell of panic. He regretted asking her immediately.

My fists clenched at my side. I kept my mind's eye focused on him, blocking out all other white noise. I saw her face as the question was implied. Her eyes got minutely wider and the brown was so utterly piercing that my abdomen clenched in want.

She shook her head back and forth slowly. She began to run her fingers over the metal pole of her umbrella. He didn't take notice but I certainly did. She stumbled over an excuse of why she might not be able to make it on Saturday, but the boy brought up the fact that she had already gotten Jessica a gift last week when he saw her. She sighed in defeat and then smiled kindly with a dismissing, "I guess I'll see what happens on Saturday."

She briefly waved in a friendly gesture and began to continue on her path. The boy walked the opposite way, glancing back at her and completely lost in his thoughts.

'Every time I catch her out she acts like I'm a stranger or something. Why am I so awkward around her? I should have just waited for her there and then… ugh! Fuck, Mike, what were you thinking?'

I walked faster to catch up to her and to escape his rambling. His guilt trip would last a few hours at least and I reminded myself to take another route when I came this way. I focused on the quiet sounds of my feet sloshing against the puddles instead of the wandering minds around me.

The girl in front of me turned onto another street and I was immediately on her trail, following her no more than fifteen behind. My jaw clenched when I smelled her, the clean scent exacerbated by the rain. I sucked in a deep breath and moved closer. She slowed a bit and I saw her head turn minutely.

Her feet picked up pace as she crossed the street and ducked into the safety of a darkened bookstore. She fumbled with the keys and opened the door. I ducked behind a tree and watched her through the glass of the store. She looked outside, directly where I was standing even though she couldn't see me. Her eyes were a bit panicked but she turned quickly and began setting things up to open the store.

I turned and walked back the way I came, avoiding the road towards the coffee shop and taking a back road.

--

The rain was thick against the glass when I arrived home. The room was nearly black in the early hours of the morning. I dropped my jacket against the wall and let it slump unceremoniously to the floor. I had six hours until I would go anywhere.

I clicked the button on the answering machine out of habit and nothing came but a small beep indicating no new messages. I grabbed the top book from one of the piles around the living room and opened to the page where I'd marked last.

In the grand scheme of things six hours was nothing. I could stand on my hands for six hours and not think twice about it. My eyes tore away from the page I was reading and out through the window where the rain continued to pour.

I had watched humans for many years and never thought about it being wrong or strange. Scientists studied different animals, children watched anthills and most homes had animals which they kept and observed. In all reality there was nothing wrong with my… fascination.

Isabella Swan was my… pet in a sense. I had watched her for three years now, every movement and every step. I had only just removed myself while she went to work. My mind wandered back to the moment where she lowered her umbrella, the way her eyes crinkled when her heel caught in the crack.

I wanted her in the worst way possible. It was something in what I was, that once we had an attachment, we needed to find a way to detach it. It was a vague theory, but when I had become convinced I could hold an honest job like a regular human I went job hunting for three months before making a decision to work in an office. After a week I quit the job and decided working wasn't for me.

It had happened several times with different authors, musicians, even states and countries. Those like myself clamped onto a hobby or an obsession and hung onto it with every ounce of their being until it was done, finished, drained, dead.

At that thought my mind raced with nostalgia and I began to dissect each phase until I found something that carried over into the creature I had become.

--

Six hours passed quickly in the silence of my small penthouse. The rain had stopped at intervals and it came down even harder around noon when I left.

I walked at a leisurely pace down the cracked streets and quiet roads. My hair was drenched by the time I made it to the bookstore again. The smell of my leather jacket was pungent but I ignored it when I spotted her behind the counter.

She had put her hair up with loose tendrils falling down around her face and neck. She was speaking with another co-worker about which books were coming in later on in the evening before slipping on her thin sweater over her sundress. When she stepped outside, her umbrella opened once more and I could see nothing more than her legs and tiny waist.

She began walking back in the direction I had just come from and I kept a safe distance behind her. Abruptly her heart picked up in her chest, almost to the point where it sounded like a hummingbird was trapped in her chest.

She stopped cold in her tracks.

I stopped no more than ten feet behind her. The umbrella lowered and she turned slowly. Her heart penetrated every sound, the buzz of people in the distance melted away and all I could focus on were those large brown eyes looking up at me.

Her lips parted slightly and she turned her body fully around until she was facing me. The rain continued to pour and with the umbrella lowered droplets splashed on her eyelids and lips. Her skin was pale to match the grey skies but with her beating heart it made the blood rush to her neck and slowly to her cheeks. She looked shocked, scared, flustered but then her wide, innocent eyes met mine and she looked like she'd been expecting me.

"Edward," she said curtly, quietly.

It had been a while since I'd heard her voice. Listening from a distance while she spoke to others didn't compare to direct communication. I nodded at her and bowed my head a bit. The pink on her cheeks intensified as the silence between us grew on. A horn blaring close by startled her and her whole body jerked. I chuckled and she snapped her eyes back up.

"I thought you were gone until tomorrow…" she trailed off.

"I came back early." I always came back early, she should have known that by now.

She nodded and smoothed hair back from her face. There were a thousand things moving in her eyes, a million questions dancing on her lips, but she said nothing. I wondered if this was awkward for her, I couldn't tell, but judging by the way she was moving her legs slowly back and forth, I determined she was uncomfortable.

She swallowed. "Would you like to go to lunch with me?"

"Of course," I answered.

Thank you to everyone who read and will continue to read.

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