Things a Shinra employee is not allowed to do… EVER

I am never under any circumstance to ask Cloud how long it takes him to do his hair every morning.

If I do ask him this, I will not say "Girls take less time!" in a stunned voice.

I am not allowed to ask Sephiroth what type of Herbal Essense he uses. Doing so will get me a one way ticket to Hojo's lab.

I will not ask Tifa Lockheat if she has ever had a boob job. She will kick my ass in a highly painful way.

I am never allowed to mention "Zack could've found you instead." when Vincent is having a bad day.

I am also not allowed to say the above about Reno.

I am not allowed out of my dorm when Rufus is nearby anymore.

I will never ask Tseng and Rufus if they like boys. No matter how funny I find their reaction.

I will never tell Reno "I triple dog dare you…" again. Though it did get over a thousand hits on Shinra's homepage.

I will also not say the above to Zack though it was highly amusing and even Sephiroth laughed.

I will never ask Rufus why he doesn't try to get a tan.

I am never allowed to play strip poker with the turks.. No matter how much I like the sight of Tseng in only his boxers.

If I do play strip poker I am not allowed to paste pictures on Shinra's homepage.

I am never allowed to ask Yuffie if she ADD/ADHD

The above is also not to be said to Reno or Zack.

I am never allowed to make passes at Rufus.

Yes, he's mine anyway! -writer unknown.

We know it's you Tseng! -Reno & Zack

Who is this Tseng you speak of? -unknown

Yes and that moonshine you think no one knows about exploded again, you two. -Sephiroth

Serious Tseng, just stop. Even I Know it's you. -Cloud

Sephiroth and Tseng have my personal permission to deal with all who break this. -Rufus Shinra