Title: Imposter
Pairing: Bak/Fou-ish
Rating: T
Humor, maybe romance?

Disclaimer: If I owned DGM, it would be hideous and no one would read it.

A/N: After rereading volume 9 again (and again..) I was hit with the overwhelming need to write Bak/Fou. THEY ARE SO CANON. It's ridiculous. Anyway, I hope you enjoy! And if there are any mistakes, please don't hesitate to tell me. :)

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"Bak? Baaaaak…wake up…"

"Nngh…too early…" Bak moaned. He had pulled all-nighters for three days now; he really didn't need someone waking him up. Though that voice did sound familiar…

"Get up, sleepyhead! It's me, Lenalee!"

Bak's eyes shot open, only to find the object of his affection barely two inches from his face. Her hips straddled his covered waist and she sported a huge grin.

"Oh, you're awake now. Good."

"Lenalee! W-what are you d-doing here?!" He spluttered, very flustered.

She leaned back, giggling. Bak was glad that she had moved away from his face, but now her weight was positioned over a rather…sensitive area.

"I'm here to see my old friend Bak! It's been a while, hasn't it?" Now that she had moved back a bit, he could see that her uniform was unzipped a little in the front, and she was wearing nothing underneath. Bak's head was spinning; it really was a miracle he hadn't broken out in hives now.

"I-I suppose. I hope you don't mind me asking but…why are you on top of me?" And could you possibly get off, he screamed silently.

Lenalee giggled again. "I just felt like it. You're very comfy."

Bak coughed, feeling awkward yet happy that she complimented(?) him. "Yes, well…would you mind getting off? I have to get back to work; Wong is probably waiting for me."

"Oh, but it's pretty early! Surely you can stay just a tiny bit longer." Lenalee started to lean forward again, her boobs and stomach touching his clothed chest and her face barely an inch away from his. An impish grin danced across her lips.

Bak gulped, his blood pumping fast. "L-Lenalee…you're being awfully forwar-" He was cut off by her lips enveloping his own. He spent a moment caught in a state of pure shock, his wide eyes staring at her long black eyelashes. Then reality caught up, and he felt the hives spread like wildfire across his skin.

"Mmph!" He tried to speak, but her tongue immediately dived into his open mouth and started to dexterously play with his own.

How odd this all was! Never before had she seemed interested in him at all. And she was acting very provocatively, not at all like she usually was. That thought reminded him that a beautiful girl was kissing him, and instead of kissing her back he puzzling out her reasoning. He felt something inside him snap, and he began to eagerly respond to her advances.

'This is the happiest moment of my life,' he thought as he tangled his hands in her raven locks. The kiss was getting pretty heavy, and he could barely think. All his blood seemed to rushing through his body at an unhealthily fast rate. He broke the kiss and opened his eyes slowly, in dire need of air.

He watched with increasing horror as the face of Lenalee slowly morphed into that of Fou, his gatekeeper. The weight that was pressing on him also became lighter. She sported that same impish grin that he had seen earlier on the imposter-Lenalee.

"Got you, stupid Bak." She said with a dark chuckle.

"FOU!" He cried, mortified.

She rolled off his chest and sauntered to the door, looking over her shoulder with a smirk. "Don't take too long getting rid of that boner, stupid. You have lots of work to do." And with a slam she was gone, leaving Bak cursing and raging in her wake.

Only later, after avoiding Fou like the plague for a week, did he wonder why she needed to kiss him in order to tease him. And how she became such a good kisser in the first place.

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Thank you for reading! Comments and criticism are appreciated. :D