"Get out! I mean it, Meguri. Get out right now!"

"I can't, Sir. With all due respect, there's some buisness in here that can't be left any longer." I called back to my clearly infuriated Captain. I was testing my luck to it's limits here; I'd only been in Captain Hitsugaya's squad for a week and already I had him shouting at me. Yup, I told myself. I give it a week before he kicks me out.

"Business?! In my office? What can be so important that you need to do it in my office?" he exclaimed incredulously. "And more to the point, why do I have to be locked out?"

I winced; what could I say to that? The truth? I snorted derisively – yeah, that'll happen. I wouldn't tell my closest friends – not that I had many of those – what I was up to at the minute, let alone my hotheaded Captain. He'd never understand anyway...

"Sorry, Captain. It's a sensitive issue that I cannot divulge to second persons."

It was a struggle but I just managed to hold back the wave of laughter at the thought of his face when he heard that. I'd bet he was apt to explode right about now. Seriously, the way I behaved it was a wonder any of the squads agreed to take me. It wasn't as if this was my first screw up – I had a bit of a track record for these kind of escapades.

I still remembered my first squad from back in the day. Ah, such fond memories! Squad 6 had been such a blast! I'd really liked that squad... too bad no one warned me about Captain Kuchiki's strict 'NO FUN' rule. I mean how was I supposed to know he had issues with those hair clips of his? All I did was hide them in his office and what did I get? A one way ticket to Squad 3 and a restraining order.

Squad 3 had not been so much fun. My Vice-Captain had been alright – a bit of a sissy but a good laugh if you pestered him long enough – but my Captain, such as he was, was a stereotypical pervert. Every time Captain Ichimaru smiled at me, I swear he was using x-ray vision to see through my clothes. Needless to say, when I pointed this out he was less than impressed.

And it had gone on like that since my graduation; I was always being switched from pillar to post, barely in a squad long enough to really be considered a member of it in the first place. Not that I minded. What was life without a little excitement, eh?

"Meguri... You'd better get out of my office. Now, before I break down the door." Captain Hitsugaya said in a dangerously quiet voice. Something told me that if it came to that, a transfer to another squad wouldn't be the only thing I got.

"I wouldn't if I were you, Sir. I've rigged the door with Kidou. If you force it in anyway it'll explode; and just in case you reckon it's worth the damage, I've put the important documents I was delivering beside it. In other words, unless you want those papers to go up in flames you'll leave me be until I'm done."

His profound shock at my threat carried through the door and I smirked. So predictable! Damage to his office would be bearable but his precious files were irreplaceable. Satisfied, I wandered across the room to get on with my business. Now that I was sure he wouldn't bust in I could go with a sense of peace.

"When you get out here..." he fumed ineffectually.

I rolled my eyes. I knew him better than he thought; Vice-Captain Matsumoto did worse than me every day and he never felt the need to turn her into frosty the snowman. And why? Because he wasn't like that. He'd never lay a hand on his subordinates unless they broke the law. And technically, I wasn't breaking the law. What I was doing was just frowned upon.

At last I was finished and I undid the Kidou (which had been very real) and slid open the Shoji. There stood my enraged Captain, hand on the hilt of his Zanpakutou. Maybe I'd been wrong about the not harming his underlings thing? 'Cause right now I had a tingling feeling in my gut that told me I was staring death in the face. All four foot of it..

"Now, Captain," I rushed to reason with him. "I haven't done any harm. Look; your office is fine! It was really important..."

He peered over my shoulder (goodness knows how; I'm at least a foot taller than him!) and his eyebrows knitted in that same frown he'd worn the day we met, when I was being inducted into Squad 10. I could remember looking at him with that half-scowl on his puss and thinking: 'Wow! My reputation precedes me!'.

He returned his gaze to me and I offered a tiny, anxious grin in the hopes of placating him. If I was lucky (which I tended not to be in such matters) he'd forgive me and I could take another crack at being a member of Squad 10. Moving was fun and all but if I had to choose a squad I'd rather be Squad 10. Why? 'Cause that way I'd have an awesome Vice-Captain and a Captain who was smaller than me!

"The toilet? You locked me out because you needed to use my toilet?!" he exclaimed. Wow. He's smart.

"Yeah." I admitted sheepishly, rubbing the back of my head.

"... Explain." he ordered. I would have refused but under that icy glare only the bravest (or most brain-dead) would disobey.

"Well, I needed to go... And I don't like people hearing me at the toilet." I murmured, looking at my feet. I kicked at the floor aimlessly waiting for him to say something. No reply was forthcoming so I decided to take the initiative. "So... Shall I pack my stuff?"

"... No. Just... just get back to work." he sighed, shaking his head as if he didn't quite believe my stupidity. I jumped up and squealed, terrifying him. Without thinking, I threw my arms around his neck and gave him a bone-crushing hug that he might have been trying to escape... I didn't really notice 'cause he was so totsie. Then, without a backwards glance, I rushed away to find Vice-Captain Matsumoto.

As I told her my story, Matsumoto laughed uncontrollably, holding her stomach and wincing through her guffaws as they made her cramp. I laughed along too, remembering the terror on his face when I'd jumped up to hug him. Who knew? Maybe I'd found my true squad after all.

Randomness! Lol. I was watching The Diamond Dust Rebellion and for some odd reason I started to wonder what would happen if Hitsugaya had an out of control subordinate. There will be more random oneshots featuring Hitsugaya and Meguri's strained Captain/Subordinate relationship and they will all be put in here. The tiny snowflake could use some disorder in his squad (besides Matsumoto). ^_^

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