Yo, Yo MoFo's =D

This Is My First FanFic I've Decided To Put Up. It Will Be ItaNaru So Please Enjoy.

Disclaimer:I Do Not Own Naruto And Co. Happy Now Legal Bitches?

Flame And Get Blowtorched Back To the Highest Degree XD... Perhaps Leave A Review... I Always Reply :).

Knock! Knock!

Itachi sighed in aggravation as he dropped his book onto his blanket-clad knees. Peace and quiet was not in his favour today.

"Come in," he bit out. The Mahogany door flew open and in strode his adorable younger brother with the usual arrogant air around him. Itachi glared at the invader of his privacy.

"Good morning brother, or should I say Good afternoon," Sasuke smirked and walked over to the Itachi's leather couch in the far corner of the room.

Sitting down he folded his legs and began," As yesterday was your birthday I decided to buy you a gift," An undertone of excitement was lingering when that sentence was spoke.

"How very kind of you," Always one to cut to the chase. Itachi gave Sasuke a side-glance, not liking the tone of his voice.

The agitated older brother turned his torso to face Sasuke his book long forgotten.

"I would have liked to discuss the matters concerning this gift in more depth but you look rather…dishevelled."

Itachi frowned knowing what his brother was talking about. His usually silky hair was scraped into a birds nest attached to a ponytail along with his usual snappy clothes being trade in for black silk pyjama bottoms; he had worn no top to bed last night.

"Matters? What is there to discuss about a gift? You give it to me I say thank you then we go our separate ways," Itachi's head tilted ever so slightly to the side.

"Oh, you'll see soon enough," Sasuke looked at his watch then back to his brother," Actually your present should be here in about 45 minutes to be exact. The person who had gone to collect it should know I do not tolerate lateness," The last line was said more to himself than Itachi.

"Little Brother, pardon me but what exactly is this gift you speak of? Not that I can't wait."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the little brother comment but it was soon morphed into a full-blown devilish smirk.

"This gift is for your benefit. It is a, how do you say, cure to you're A-sexuality."

"You really are an idiot, if you've gone and hired a-" Itachi's face was incredulous.

"Do shut up, Virgin Mary and let me finish," Sasuke went to open his mouth, but to his annoyance Itachi got there first.

"Little brother, I assure you I am not A-sexual. Just because I feel no need to have intercourse with every whore you introduce to me, it does not mean I am A-sexual," Itachi tried to keep his voice calm despite the fleeting urge to strangle the other man.

"Ch, Itachi, you have refused every attempt of match-making and I have grown tired of it. You are clearly not heterosexual, so I came up with a solution," Sasuke stood up off the couch and started towards the door. The crimson eyed man tried to skewer through his younger siblings skull with his eyes but to no avail.

"You better go and take a shower," Stepping into the wide hallway Sasuke looked over his shoulder to the still bed ridden Itachi, "Word of warning: Considering who I bought from, this pet is probably high maintenance. Any documents will be Emailed to your account," and with that, Sasuke was gone.

Not feeling to chase his foolish younger brother, he slid out of his king size bed.

What does that fool mean by 'pet' surely he would not be suggesting bestiality, I know I have done a lot of illegal things but giving fellatio to a dog is not on my to do list… He wouldn't of had the gall to buy me something like that.

As Itachi walked into his en-suite bathroom he weighed the possibility of Sasuke attending a human auction.

Stripping down to his birthday suit; Itachi stepped into the shower and switched it to medium. Sighing, Itachi recalled the events of last night.

FLASHBACK START.

Returning from an uptown restaurant in his chauffeured Rolls Royce, Itachi was glad to set foot through the Uchiha mansions door. Riding the lift to his floor of the house he pulled the key out from his back pocket. Promptly striding to his bedroom door, he slipped the key into the lock and twisted it. Pushing against the door he found it locked.

Furrowing his eyebrows, he flicked the key anti-clockwise and the door unlocked. Kicking it open, he was greeted with streams of party-string and confetti. Gritting his teeth knowing exactly who was standing in front of him, he looked up with a death glare.

From his string-covered face, he met eyes with a grinning blond haired imbecile.

"Happy birthday 'Tachi!"

"Deidara, why are you in my room this late at night?" Itachi growled his voice laced with aggravation.

"Hey, hey don't forget about us!" Itachi whipped his head around so fast the majority of the party string flew onto Deidara. His eyes widened when he saw the whole of Akatsuki, his work group, strewn about his room. Tobi, the one who had shouted was bouncing up and down on his couch waving a flag. Itachi turned his whole body around and saw a fold out table covered in Vodka, whiskey, brandy and just about every other alcohol that they could have robbed from the Uchiha's bar.

"How the hell did you lot get in here?!" The group all looked in Deidara's direction and Itachi spun on his heel in time to see the artist making his way to the door.

He grabbed Deidara by the collar of his Bomber man shirt and sighed, "I should have known."

The artist flipped around in Itachi's grasp, giving a sheepish grin. He blew a sparkly party horn in Itachi's face, "Surprise, un!"

FLASHBACK END.

Straining his hair of his cinnamon shampoo, he rinsed it thoroughly before reluctantly switching of the warm cascades of water. Stepping out of the steam filled cubicle he reached for the towel rack and grasped the closest fluffy material his fingers touched.

After drying himself off, he walked naked back to his room. Sliding open his walk in closet he browsed around for his deep red jeans. Finding them, he slung them on his shoulder before pulling out a black dress shirt.

Fully dressed Itachi strode over to his full-length mirror and sighed. His hair, like always when it was exposed to warm water, fell down past his shoulders in loose curls.

Damn it, where are those GhD's? Rooting through the basket of his hair products Itachi flicked his hair dramatically while giving a triumphant look signalling he had found the ceramic product.

As the newly appointed 20 year old ran the heated metal over his hair for the last time. His thoughts slowly trailed back to the message his foolish sibling had told him. His musings however where cut short by a firm pattern knock at his door.