A/N: Yes. I know I haven't updated my other stories in a while. But, for goodness' sakes, I have been reading WAY too many fanfics pairing one of my favorite characters with mary-sues. So, I wrote this. Even though the character I'm thinking of has nothing to do with this fandom, this was just something I needed to get out of my system. So, here we have it. Haga's view on Yugi and on Sueism overall. Oh. And, as expected, the fourth wall is going to be broken, burned, and utterly destroyed in this fic. Enjoy. ^^

Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me. All of them belong to the makers of the "Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters" anime.

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Haga's Explanation of Mary-Sue's and Gary-Stu's

A girl stepped upon the sidewalk of Domino City. She couldn't have been older than twelve or thirteen. What was her name? It was Rebecca. Rebecca Hopkins. She continued waving her hand in the air at a certain someone. She was trying to get that certain someone's attention.

"Hey! Yuugi! I wanted to tell you something! Would you mind-"

"Uh, hi, Rebecca. Listen, Anzu just told me the funniest story. One of her friends went to a restaurant and, it's so funny, they-"

"Sorry, Rebecca." Anzu interjected hurriedly. "Yuugi and I have to go to the mall to go shopping with a friend. And we're running late! Yugi can tell you about the story some other time."

Rebecca pouted.

"But, Yuugi! I want to talk you, now! Don't-"

"Sorry. I have to run, Rebecca. Bye!" And before the girl could stop him, he just started running off with Anzu. Anzu. That Anzu.

"Grrr…" Rebecca scowled, looking away. "Yuugi always spends so much time with Anzu! He never pays any attention to me!" The girl hopelessly kicked a rock and sent it scuttling across the sidewalk. It bounced off of a boy's shoe. The boy was sitting on a bench at a bus stop. A book was wedged between his fingers, covering his face. From behind the book, he snickered. It was a high-pitched, record-scratched, snicker.

"Sounds like one young lady around here is a bit…jealous." He raised an eyebrow. Every tone of his utterance suggested a smirk playing upon his lips.

Rebecca whirled around to look at him.

"What?! I don't know what you're talking about, Freak." It was clear she was in a bad mood.

The boy lowered his book to reveal an insectile appearance. Aqua-marine hair with the smooth texture of water, frozen blue eyes, and large glasses jumped out at average passersby. And he was adjusting those glasses as his eyes were fixed upon Rebecca.

"Miss Hopkins, there's really no need to be so rude. You can admit it. I know I'm not mistaken, as I'm quite familiar with the emotion of jealousy. And it's in your eyes, my girl. It really is." The boy let out another snicker.

"I don't know what you're-" Then, Rebecca blinked. "Wait…You're Insector Haga! I watched you on TV, a year ago. You're the Japanese national champion, aren't you?" She gasped.

"Ah!" Haga let out a bitter cackle. "I'm glad to see my short legacy is still remembered somewhat..."

"Who could forget that face?"

"Grr…" Haga stood up, stuffing the book half-way into his pocket. "Still so rude, my girl? You act like you're just itching to be fed to my…pets." He snarled, eyes slits.

Rebecca scowled.

"You can't scare me, Bug Boy. My friend Yuugi will come and rescue me…unless…unless…" Her face fell.

Haga's expressions changed as well – This time, to a knowing smile.

"Unless he's too busy with…?"

"Too busy with Anzu." Rebecca spat.

"Yes," Haga nodded knowingly. "So, what are you going to do about it, Miss Hopkins?"

"Hrm…I don't know…I mean-" She blinked suddenly.

"What?"

"Wait a minute. How do you know my name?"

"Why, Miss Rebecca Hopkins, you are the American National Champion! I make It a point to do research on my…" A smirk crept across his face. "Competition." Haga reached a hand out. "Pleasure to meet you."

"Uh, can't say I feel the same, but hi." Rebecca reluctantly shook his hand and wiped it off on her skirt almost immediately afterwards.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk…" Haga frowned. "Rude, rude, rude! For goodness' sake, Miss Hopkins, I thought you and I were equals, but now, I must admit, I'm starting to think otherwise." He sighed. It was not obvious to Rebecca at the time, but Haga was trying subtle methods to butter her up. "But, anyway, what are you going to do to make Yuugi notice you?"

"What do you care?"

"I'm curious. And bored. Very, very, bored. And, besides, the rock you kicked was what jerked my mind out of my book. So, therefore, it is your obligation to keep me entertained for a while."

"And if I don't?"

"Well, I'll just have to follow you around for a bit. It will help me relieve boredom to breath down your neck for the time being." He laughed.

This very notion gave Rebecca shivers. She sighed.

"Fine. Actually…" She thought about it. "Maybe, you could help me?"

"How so?"

"Well…You hate Yuugi, right?"

"Very true. And?"

"And, so…Yuugi must hate you, right?"

"Er…"

"So, I want you to go on a date with me at the mall so that we can make Yugi jealous! It'll be really easy, since you two are enemies. So, what do you say? I'll give you a rare card!"

There was a long, empty, pause in the street drenched by overcast grey light. Finally, someone spoke. It was Haga.

"Er, Rebecca, that won't work."

"Why not?"

"It is virtually impossible for Yuugi to get jealous of anyone. Actually, I must correct you on a previous assumption: He doesn't even hate me! It's impossible for him to hate anyone, really!" Haga was laughing, quite good-naturedly actually. Few people could tell the difference between his laughs, though. To most, he always sounded mocking.

So, it was Rebecca's immediate response to pout angrily.

"Why not? I mean, I sort've understand about the hate thing. 'Hate' is a strong word. But, come on…Everyone gets jealous!"

Haga thought for a moment. He had expected such a response, but now he had to respond to it. He put on a crooked smile.

"You…really don't know. Do you?"

"Know what?"

"My dear girl…" He shook his head with the crooked smile still on. "Yuugi is a Gary-Stu."

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A/N: And so ends the intro. This is going to be a three-part explanation on Sues, both for canon and for fanfiction, though the former more than the latter. :) It's going to explore deeply into the concept of what a Sue is as well as other types of Sues that rarely get addressed in explanations like these. Because, apparently, Haga is knowledgeable in this matter as a minor character who is able to view other characters from an outside-POV.

Oh, and...If anyone is angry at me for saying that Yuugi's a Stu, just accept the truth: He is. I'm not bashing him. Heck, I even like him a little bit. I'm just stating the truth. And I'll back up my point in Part 2. :)