I am Fail on updating on here. Sorry to you all. Enjoy!
"Here's to my first day as Head Bitch." Meredith said, raising her glass in a toast. The other occupants at the table did as well, laughing. She had met the rest of the administrative' group that Cristina had recommended. Alex was…well…a cocky asshole…basically McSteamy 2.0 and Izzie and George were just as Cristina had described them…def the Gruesome Twosome…it would be fun to fuck with them…all together they were cool and she could see herself actually maybe enjoying her stay here…as long as her friend Jose was involved. He always promised a good time.
"Let's play Truth or Dare." Izzie suggested. Everyone groaned. Meredith looked at them. There had to be a story there.
"What?" She asked.
"Last time we played, Izzie, brilliant brainiac that she is, dared George to go hit on this chick at the bar…at least we thought it was a chick…" Cristina began.
"So wasn't a chick." George said, shuddering.
"You did gain a new friend Bambi." Alex said, laughing.
"Yeah, but only so he wouldn't make me his bitch." George interjected.
Meredith snorted.
"I'm in. Unless you guys are too chicken?" She asked, raising her eyebrow in a challenge.
"In." They all agreed.
"Okay here are the rules." Izzie began.
"Rules? You guys have rules? Oh hell no, you play with me you throw that rules shit out the window. Capice?" She asked.
"No problem." Cristina said. She loved a good competition.
"Okay, I will start. Alex, truth or dare?" She asked.
"Dare of course." Alex said.
Meredith spotted just who she was looking for across the room.
"I want you to go tell Firecrotch…I mean Dr. Montgomery…that you have decided to switch to the Gynie Brigade…in front of Mark Sloan." She dared.
The color drained out of Alex's face.
"Damn Grey…that is like career suicide." He complained.
"Oh lighten up Pansy Ass and go do it." She ordered. "Unless you just won't and in that case…"
"I'm going and beware Grey, beware." He said, draining his drink and stalking over to the group of Attendings.
"Um…Dr. Montgomery…I just…" Alex stuttered.
"Yes Karev?" She said, full of spite and malice. Plastics was a horrible career path in her eyes, full of vapid patients and doctors for that matter.
"I have decided that Plastics isn't for me and I would love the opportunity to practice Gyne…" He swallowed the bullshit word. "cology." He finished.
"What?" Mark said. He had to put up with this cocky bastard for seven fucking years and now he decides he wants to pull babies out of twats?
"There are so many tummy tucks and ass lifts you can do before you feel like you have a greater meaning in life…sir…sorry." Alex said, mentally cursing Meredith.
"Um…you would have to clear it with Bailey?" Addison asked, very confused at Alex Karev's sudden change of heart. She has thought about sleeping with him, but he had bad mouthed her occupation so much she would have had to gag him if that were to ever happen, without Derek ever knowing of course.
"Yeah…um…sure. Have a nice night." He said, backing up and almost running back to the table. Meredith smirked at him.
"I know you are my boss, but I hate you right now." He told her.
She grinned at him and blew him a kiss.
They played for another hour. George refused to pick a dare after last time. No amount of ribbing could convince him otherwise. Cristina got dared to drink four shots of tequila…in rapid succession. She looked a little green. Izzie had to take off her bra and throw it at the next table. She got four phone numbers. Up until that point Meredith had done dares but it seemed like they were afraid to push her too far.
"Truth or Dare Meredith?" Alex asked, his eyes glinting with mischief.
"Dare." She said confidently. Bring it on Bitch!
"Oh this is going to be good." Cristina murmured.
"I dare you to go straddle Dr. Hunt over there." He said.
Cristina gritted her teeth. No one knew except for Owen, herself and now Meredith about their 'relationship'.
Meredith looked at Cristina and nodded reassuringly at her.
"Done." She said, walking steadily towards the table holding Mark, Addison, Owen and Derek. She plopped herself into Owen's lap and whispered 'relax, this is okay with her, it's just a dare' in his ear. He nodded once and his eyes smiled at her. Damn he was hot. They knew how to grow them here. She turned to the other shocked occupants at the table.
"How is everyone?" She said smiling widely.
"What do you think you are doing?" Addison asked.
"I am giving Major Hottie here a lap dance. What did it look like I was doing? Oh wait…you probably don't know what that is…it is where a girl dry fucks a guy while sitting on his lap. It is major fun. You should try it, Derek would like it, I'm sure." She quipped while winking at Derek and Mark.
"I highly doubt that." Addison said stiffly.
"I don't. Here I will prove it to you." Meredith got up and straddled Derek's lap and gyrated on his lap. He stifled a groan and glared at her. She smiled wickedly. She looked at Addison.
"He likes it…a lot. About nine to ten inches a lot I would say." She smirked.
Addison turned an interesting shade of red. Meredith got up…rather reluctantly. Dude was packing a huge cock that rivaled Mr. Bunny. Derek arranged his boner quickly and glanced nervously between Meredith and Addison.
"Better see if McBitchy here needs any CPR. I will see you all later." She waggled her fingers at them and walked seductively away. She glanced back and saw Derek trying to calm Addison down. Take that beotch…
Cristina got on her knees and bowed down to Meredith.
"You are the High Priestess of Bitchiness. I bow to you." She said.
"Get up off the floor, do you have any idea how filthy it is?" Meredith said.
"Yep, too drunk to care." Cristina said, getting up and popping a peanut in her mouth as she settled back into her chair.
"You just made an enemy for life." Izzie said, looking back where Addison was shrieking at Derek.
"Do I look like I care? I will be here for three months tops. She will be a blip on my radar by then. Besides what is she going to do? I am technically her boss." Meredith shrugged.
"She might stab you with her five inch Manalo's." Alex pointed out.
Meredith snorted.
"Please, like I don't carry a ten blade on my person twenty four seven…"
"You are very scary…hot…but scary." George slurred.
Meredith patted him on his cheek.
"How sweet…you do know you don't have a chance in hell with me right?" Meredith said, nipping that crush in the fucking bud.
"Yeah, I still like looking at you though." He smiled dreamily at her.
"Oh god, someone get him laid please." Meredith looked at Izzie.
'Don't look at me." She said, shaking her head.
"Hey! Bambi!" Cristina yelled.
"Huh? Mommy? What?" He yelled and looked around wildly.
Cristina rolled her eyes.
"How did we ever become friends? Look, see that nurse over there? Dark hair, big teeth, always eating candy? Yeah…her. So go fuck her…now." She ordered.
"Okay." He grinned, getting up and stumbling over to a table full of women.
"Who did you just send him to?" Meredith asked.
"Rose Collins…Head of the Skankanonymous Club." Cristina informed her.
"And you sent George over there? She will eat him alive…especially with those teeth." Meredith said craning her neck to keep an eye on him.
"He is a grown boy." Alex said.
"Who can end up with McSteamy's syphilis if he is not careful. I assure you he doesn't want it to fall off." Meredith reasoned.
"Sloan had syphilis?" Cristina gasped before laughing loudly.
"Ewwww…" Izzie said.
"Didn't you sleep with him two years ago?" Alex pointed out.
"You don't think I have it do you?" She asked panicked.
"Has your pussy rotted out?" Meredith asked.
"No…"
"Then I think you are safe…so…how was he?" Meredith asked, creeping closer to Izzie.
"He knows what he is doing, but…"
"But?" Meredith and Cristina asked eagerly.
"Ok I am leaving on that note. Nice to meet ya Grey. See you tomorrow everyone." Alex said sauntering off. No one noticed his departure.
Izzie blushed.
"He…I mean…he wasn't…" She lowered her voice to a whisper. "…very big."
Meredith and Cristina blinked and shared a look.
"Like how not very big?" Meredith prompted.
"You cant tell anyone…" Izzie warned.
"We won't." They said simultaneously.
"Okay…he is…a six incher." Izzie nodded earnestly.
"That is such a disappointment." Meredith said.
"Yeah. That totally ruins the fantasy." Cristina agreed.
"He knew what to do with it…you know what they say, 'it isn't the size of the boat, it's the…"
"Yeah, we got it Tinkerbell." Cristina said, holding her hand up.
"On that note I need another drink." Meredith said.
"Yeah." Cristina and Izzie agreed.
My apologies to Mark for making him tiny. *shrugs* You can't win them all...