Severus Snape hated flying.

It was something all small witches and wizards looked forward to, as they waited each year for their parents to declare them old enough to buy them their first little brooms. It's almost as exciting as muggle children learning to swim, ride bikes or even drive cars.

However, Severus hated this above all others.

"Severus! Please! Just once," Harry begged, and his emerald eyes twinkled with hope and excitement.

"No." He didn't even raise his head from the potion essays written by the 5th year students.

"I've invited you over five years now!" Harry batted his eye lashes, desperately trying to get his lover to look at him.

"I ve also said no for over five years now." Thanked Merlin the 5th year students were mostly decent students; there were minor mistakes, but nothing over concerning.

"Se~ve~ru~ssssss~!" Fine, he would draw on his last tactic.

"Allow me to point out, professor, the essays in front of you are completely untouched," Severus said as he marked down the final paper.

"Argh!!!!"

Severus smiled.

He was not afraid of height. He could very well stand and look down from the top of the Astronomy Tower. He could also go to a Ferris Wheel in a muggle town, reach to the top in those little carts and not even flinch.

He wasn't afraid of the wind on his face.

No, he wasn't scared of flying in nature.

But he just hated it.

"Please."

Severus raised an eyebrow and looked at the DADA professor, his secret lover for over 4 years, Harry Potter with his puppy eye expression.

"No." He grabbed some coffee and milk for himself, and Harry helped him got his usual toast and butter.

"I'm begging you."

"No."

"I love you."

"Wa-!!" Hot coffee almost spilled on his black robe. "Potter!"

"I love you." Harry flashed him a bright smile.

He didn t know what to say except stared at his young lover in shock. Good thing Harry s voice was low, therefore only allowing the other professors to hear.

"Stop laughing! Minerva!" He growled.

He hated the feeling of grabbing onto a broom. He hated the feeling of soaring in the sky after one small kick. He hated the feeling of owning freedom, even for a second.

As if he owned the world.

As if he was as free as all his dark past never existed.

The sky was his for the taking, and he had all the freedom to go anywhere he wanted.

It made him want to cry.

"Just once. If you still hate it, then I ll never bug you again."

"Harry, I..."

"I just want to share that romantic feeling with you."

"Harry ..."

"Really, just once, I promise."

"....."

Even if the world understood him, knew him and forgave him. Some were even foolish enough to call him the most tragic hero from the war.

But he couldn't forgive himself.

He sometimes thought that such a dark and twisted creature as himself didn't deserve to live. He didn't deserve to be respected, and he sure didn't deserve to be loved by this young and energetic Harry.

Harry would laugh out loud, and held him tight with all he might.

That made him to hate flying even more.

"Please remind me why I even agreed to come with you in the first place."

"Because you love me?"

"I'm having second thoughts."

"No way!" Harry grabbed his arm, and his flashy broom which Severus couldn't even name was right there.

"..."

"Ready?" The smile on Harry's face was enough to make Severus forgot about his own annoyance.

Then, just like that, he sat on the broom with his back against Harry's chest, and Harry's arms reached around his body to grab the front of the broom.

Harry's foot gently kicked the grassy field, and he felt gentle wind on his face.

He closed his eyes tightly, refused to register the sudden attack of flying feelings.

"Look."

He heard Harry's voice, but his hands were trembling. He didn't want this. He didn't like uncertainties. He was never used to the idea of the freedom from flying, let along the uncertainties which he couldn't control.

Then he felt Harry's right arm tightened around his waist.

"Severus, look."

That was the first time he considered the castle which he lived for the past years as beautiful.

Cool wind of the autumn evening was on his face, moving away the black hair which covered his face. He could clearly feel Harry's breathing and the protective arm around him.

He wasn't a romantic person. He couldn only say the evening sky looked still and quiet, perhaps even something he never experienced: peace.

His chest was overflowing, his eyes stung, and he couldn't breath.

"Try to breath with me," Harry said quietly, almost gentle.

He tried hard to inhale and exhale.

Harry circled a few rounds above the mysterious castle.

He tried very hard to suppress his ready to explode emotions.

He knew that the reason for this wasn't because he was flying.

Only he knew the reason behind this kind of excitement and letting go of his emotions.

Harry looked at him as they slowly descended, but Severus didn't know how to describe the smile on Harry's face.

Harry reached out a hand and touched his face, then suddenly held him tight.

The wall he built over the decades was crumbling because of Harry.

But it seemed to be ok.

He closed his eyes.

For he knew, Harry would hold him tight under all the freedom and uncertainties.

And that s quite enough.

fin

My first HP slash story (blush)