R.A.C.88: My first Shakugan no Shana story!! Enjoy!

Shana cried. For the first time in her whole life she cried like someone she loved died.

She was heartbroken and she can't take the pain. She tried to forget that moment but it kept replaying in her head and it crushed her heart more and more. She was crying so much that her eyes were so sore.

Flashback:

"Uh . . . Yuji," Kazumi walked to him shyly, ignoring Shana behind Yuji. She was flaring mad.

"What is it, Kazumi-chan?" he asked, she was blushing hardly, and Shana hated Kazumi more and more each second.

"Wh–––?" before he could continue his sentence she kissed him. His eyes widened and he replied to the kiss. They were both forgetting that Shana was with them.

Shana ran away, Yuji pulled away from Kazumi and ran after Shana. Kazumi hated Shana but was proud of her kiss with Yuji.

"Shana! Matte kudasai!" Yuji yelled. "Iie! I don't want to!! Leave me alone, jerk!" Shana cried. Yuji stopped. He knows that Shana needed a time out. He hoped that she would forgive him.

'God, Shana. I'm sorry.' Yuji cursed himself but did nothing when Kazumi went with him.

End of flashback

"I'm so –hic- stupid!" Shana wailed. Alastor said, "Let us leave. You cannot fulfill your task in that condition. Train and forget your emotions once more," he tried to approach cautiously. Shana understood what he meant. "I'm sorry Alastor, for letting you see me cry like a baby." Shana tried to make her voice strong. "It's okay. That's what you get when you mingle with humans," he tried to tease. Shana slightly laughed.

Shana went down Yuji's house's roof. "Shana, darling?" Yuji's mom called out. "Yes?" she asked politely. "What will you do now?" his mom asked. "Please tell Yuji to not look for me. And tell him, I left a note in his first drawer." Shana smiled sadly. "I'm sorry," his mom hugged her. "It's okay," Shana assured her, "Thank you," she smiled. His mom cried. "Don't worry; I'll be fine, I promise." Shana kissed his mom's forehead and left.

His mom thought bitterly, 'You baka, Yuji! What did you do to Shana now?' Shana was already out of town when Yuji rushed to his house when he couldn't find Shana on their rooftop. 'Shana!' he mentally screamed.

Flashback:

"Yuji," an emotionless Shana called out to him. She was staring at the stars. They were on the rooftop and the moon was shining brightly almost as brightly as the sun. "Yes?" he asked her, marveling at her beauty.

"What does it feel like to love?" she asked softly. "I don't know," he lied. "Other people say that you would die just to protect the person you love. Others say that it felt like heaven. Others say that you have to feel it for yourself." he continued his statement.

"Are you in love, Yuji?" Shana asked softly. He blushed, "What?!" Shana laughed. "I was just asking if you're in love. I wasn't saying if it was with me!!" Shana laughed some more. "Maybe," he answered absent-mindedly. Shana stared at him and marveled as he looked at the moon, thinking between the two.

End of Flashback

Yuji scrambled to get to the living room. "SHANA!" he yelled. He was panicking. He found his mom crying, "Mom?" he asked. "How could you, Yuji? Shana loved you!" his mom wailed. His face paled. "What?" he asked bewildered. "Shana told me to tell you to not look for her and that she left a note in your first drawer. She wanted to say goodbye, I can tell. But I guess, she doesn't have the strength, she maybe a very courageous and strong girl but there are times when all people have weaknesses, and you just let Shana recognize hers." His mother said emptily.

Yuji was walking like a zombie up to his room and opened his first drawer. His room was "surprisingly" clean. He saw a black paper. 'Unusual,' he thought. He opened it and what was in it made him cry. Her letter was written in red ink, hopefully it wasn't her blood. But what was written made his heart break.

Yuji,

I cleaned your room as my gift! Heck, who am I faking for? I hope you're happy with Kazumi. I'm not making you guilty if that's what you think. I am going to complete my mission. I will be around the country but please, don't look for me. If you ever find me, don't pay attention to me. I want to leave the past as a past and nothing more and nothing less. I hope you understand. When I meet you, I doubt that I'll still remember you and have any emotions. With this letter, I seal my confession, I love you Yuji Sakai. I love you with all my heart, but I doubt you do. I'm frustrated, Yuji. Is that also an emotion you feel when you're in love?

Yuji, remember when you told me that I don't have a heart, because I made Kazumi cry? I'm sorry for that. I don't really have one, you just replaced mine. I'm happy for all the memories you gave me. They were all fun. I can't write sad things in this letter. I don't want you to feel sad, Yuji. Alastor told me to leave, for both our good. I'll miss you. Deep inside my heart, you'll stay there. I'll pretend that I never known you and pretend that I never loved you and pretend that I've never heard of or met you. All I can do is pretend. I can never do it Yuji! Please also remember that I kept my heart with you, so please take care of it.

Yuji, please forgive me. If you see your mom crying, it's my fault. I'm very sorry. I told her I'll be okay, but it was as if she saw right through me. Yuji, please remember me through your memories. I'll still protect you, that is why I'll be staying at the border of the town. Please be careful, too. Yuji, Aishiteru. I'll miss you. Kiotsukete . . .

S a y o n a r a

Loving you,

Shana

P.S.

I can never forget you because you gave me my name, remember? Thanks, from the very beginning I found it pretty. I doubt that it fits me though.

Yuji cried. "You idiot, Shana! How can you think that I never loved you?! Damn it all! This is my entire fault!!" he cried until he couldn't. He wishes he can turn back time and make up for all his mistakes. 'What if I do see Shana? Should I . . . do what she says?' he thought.

R.A.C.88: How was the first chappie? It's my first story in Shakugan! Please be nice!! Onegai?! Arigato –in advance-!! PLEASE REVIEW!!

Yuji: SHANA!!

R.A.C.88: o.O Okay?! (--.--|||)