A/N- Hey everyone, welcome to my new story. It will be a lot shorter than my last and fluffier too. The chapters are going to be shorter so you have been warned, please don't complain about them or I will write a fifteen page chapter of Edward brushing his teeth. Not really, I don't even think I could do that. : )

There will be a glossary included at the end of each chapter with slang that I use that you may or may not be familiar with.

I will be adding a link of Edward's car on my profile if I can figure out how to do it, so check it out.

Disclaimer: Anything resembling the Twilight Saga belongs to Stephenie Meyer. The visual of Edward Cullen in a Fedora you can thank me for!

I am slowly working through to edit these chapters as they never saw a beta the first time around. I will simply put revised on the chapter title so you know how far I've done.

Chapter 1 – Two Dicks are Better than One

Edward Cullen was everything a man should be. His jaw was strong, his eyes were compassionate and his form was exquisite. But Edward Cullen was a Dick, a private investigator, and that made him hated by most. Growing up he had wanted to be a fly boy, but like most of his dreams, that thought was pushed aside for a job that would keep him close to home.

His mother, Esme Cullen, became ill when Edward turned seventeen. His father had passed a year earlier, so Edward became the man of the house and found himself a job. Edward started off as a small fish but now he was the big cheese along with his partner, James. Together they were the best there was. James' uncanny ability to track anyone, and Edward's ability to dazzle the clients, kept them in the dough.

Esme never saw her son's success, but she was proud of him for what he was able to provide. At her worst, Edward would dress her each morning, feed her and bathe her each night. Edward didn't mind doing this for his mother, she was always wonderful to him as a child but he knew that her dignity faded each time he had to wash her back or clean her sheets after she had wet the bed. Edward kept her picture on his desk at work to remind him of what is important.

Edward rolled over in his bed and cracked one eye open. His head was pounding from the previous night's booze and was keeping time like an experimental jazz piece. His eyes met the strawberry blonde next to him and he smiled.

"How is my favorite doll this morning?" he asked as he ran his hand down her back. Tanya lifted her head and wagged her tail.

The connection between him and his golden retriever was the closest thing to a relationship Edward had been in. He had a lot of grateful clients, but none that stuck around for long after the case. Edward hoped the next one would be different. That the next girl he let into his life, his bed, would stay.

Edward rolled out of bed and ran his hands through his hair. He used to hate waking up alone, not counting Tanya, but now he felt like it wasn't worth it to have the wrong girl in his bed. He wondered if he would ever be able to get the right girl in it, but quickly brushed off the thought. There were many things that needed to happen before things could be that simple for him.

Tanya kept a close watch on Edward's heels as he wondered around his house. He worked long hours but would always make time to come and play with her for an hour in the daytime. Edward scratched her head and she bounded off to retrieve her ball.

Edward tossed the ball down the hallway a couple of times before filling up Tanya's food and water dishes. The blonde dog licked his hands as he set the bowls back on the floor.

The shower was warm and comforting and it allowed him to think of his coming day. He finished his last case and hoped his next will go as well. Aro had been on the lam for three years and Edward had managed to track him down in only a few months. He was good at his job, there was no denying it. Aro certainly wouldn't, seeing as he was cooling his heels in the slammer for life.

Getting dressed was Edward's favorite time of the day. His body felt clean and fresh and his face was smooth. He dressed himself in a pair of tan slacks and white button up shirt. He pulled his suspenders on before throwing his suit jacket over his shoulder. He grabbed his fedora and headed out, giving Tanya one last belly scratch before going.

Edward slipped into his 1927 Ford Model T and headed toward his office. He could have walked, but he liked being seen around town in his prize possession. It was one of the only things in his life at the moment he could flaunt.

The beautiful blonde secretary met Edward at the door as usual. Edward thought highly of the attractive woman, she would always add a little giggle water in his coffee. She was a looker for sure but her boyfriend was a baby grand and you just don't mess with a guy-like-that's girl. You also don't play with fire when you have the best typist in the city.

"Good morning Boss," Rosalie said as Edward took his coffee.

"Good morning, sweetheart," Edward replied, giving her a wink. He would never touch Rosalie but he knew how much she enjoyed attention. And Edward knew how important it was to keep his employees happy.

He headed into his office only to find James sitting in his chair. Edward stifled a growl at the sight of his partner in his personal space. Although they were partners, and complimented each other in their profession, Edward could not stand James. Edward found him arrogant not always on the up and up.

James sat smugly at Edward's oversized desk. His blonde hair slicked back making it look almost brown. He dressed more like a college student than a Dick. He had a blue shirt with a brown cardigan over it paired with a pair of brown pants. Edward thought he looked ridiculous but couldn't deny that it seemed to help him score the baby vamps he was always after.

"I finished up with the Newton case," James spoke roughly, "and there is no way I am taking another cheating case for a while."

"I didn't realize we had the luxury to start picking our clients," Edward replied, hanging up his jacket and placing his hat on the rack. Although they were successful, ninety percent of their cases were cheating husbands and there was no way they could turn them down. The women could get a little rough but Edward had always considered them easy money.

"No, no, you are right, my friend. I am just getting my frustration off my chest, besides Mrs. Newton made the case worthwhile." James smiled deviously as he thought about the bonus Mrs. Newton had given him for solving her case. James always found the sweetness is someone else's revenge.

Mike Newton had been getting some on the side for a while. Turned out it was with Mrs. Newton's best friend, Lauren. James showed Jessica the pictures and Mrs. Newton decided that Mike needed to pay. And eye for an eye, she said. Before he knew it Jessica was on her knees and James was cursing a blue streak.

Edward knew what the smile meant. He had been witness too many times to James' rendezvous with female clients. You think after the first time he would learn to lock his office door. Edward shivered as the mental picture filled his brain.

"Well, I am heading out for a ciggy, you want to come?" James asked. It had become common for James to smoke outside once he realized that there was a dance studio next door. He liked to watch the pretty girls come and go. Edward found this practice bordering on creepy.

"No, I have some paperwork to catch up on," Edward answered, grateful to be rid of his associate.

Edward was glad to be left in silence. He didn't really have any paperwork to catch up on. Edward Cullen never fell behind in anything.

The job Edward was paid to do did not leave him with a sense of satisfaction. More often than not, he felt dirty once the job was done. He was paid to make things black and white in a world so clearly full of grays. Edward had a knack for making an innocent meeting between the opposite sexes seem tawdry. He was not proud of this, but it paid the bills. Quite frequently, the client was more worried about money, than matters of the heart. It was that simple fact that makes his job easier. If he had to break hearts daily, he wouldn't know how to stand it.

Edward kicked his feet up and leaned back in his chair. The scratchy intercom carried Rosalie's voice into his office. "Mr. Cullen, an Isabella Swan here to see you."

"Thank you, show her in," Edward replied, taking his feet off his desk.

The door opened and the most stunning creature entered. Edward's breath caught as he took in her beauty. She walked in with the grace of a lioness on a hunt. Her eyes met Edward's and he could see a flash of desire in them.

She was everything a man could want. Her rich mahogany hair hung in waves and stopped halfway down her back. If you were to say she had the eyes of an angel you would have to say she had the lips of the devil, full, pouty, and blood red. She had the kind of gams that starlets insured. Above her long and shapely legs were full hips, a small waist and a full round bosom. She was exquisite and Edward knew that she was trouble. The kind of trouble a man like him lived for. Or died for.

E/N-

Glossary:

Fly Boy: An Aviator or pilot

Big Cheese: boss

Dough: money

Doll: an attractive woman

On the Lam: Fleeing from the police

Giggle Water: an intoxicating beverage (booze)

Stilts: legs

Baby Grand: heavily built man

Baby Vamp: A young attractive woman, student.

Gams: legs