Disclaimer: The Teen Titans don't belong to me.
Author's Note: Inspired by the song "Careless Whisper" by Seether. Its really intense and touching to me. BB/Rae angst and fluff. And a bit of BB/Terra angst. Please enjoy.
Apology by Mika Casey
Beast Boy was standing in front of the door to Raven's room, debating in his mind whether or not to knock on the door. She had left the dinner table abruptly when he had made a remark about her "creepy chants", thinking that she would take it lightly and laugh along with the rest. But Raven, being herself, made his plate of food blow up in his face and calmly left the table. After cleaning his face of carrots and chicken bits, Beast Boy ventured to her room in an attempt to apologize.
He couldn't bring his hand up to rap his knuckles against the door. Again, he had really hurt her feelings. Every time, he assumed she would get used to his pathetic jokes and crack a smile, but she never did. And if the jests were directed at her, he ended up with injuries or covered in whatever he was eating.
Expelling a long breath, he brought his shaking hand up to her door. It wasn't that he was scared, he had gotten over his fear of Raven a long time ago, but he didn't know what he was going to say. Every apology he gave her seemed more and more hollow. He wanted to get across to her that he really did admire her "creepy chants". He just wanted to see her happy, and his jokes failed to make her so.
Knocking three times, he bowed his head and waited. The door opened a sliver, as if she had been standing there the whole time, waiting for him to arrive. All he could see was her moon-pale face and almost-black eyes. She was scowling, glaring up at him through her eyelashes. He noted that they were dotted with tears, something he didn't usually find adorning her face.
He pressed his lips together. "Rae..." He began, but was cut off when she spoke.
"Come in." It was a command, not a request. She turned away from the door and retreated back into the room, while Beast Boy opened the door more and followed her inside.
The room was dimly lit by candles, as it always was, but something was different about it. He blinked, taking in a new noise. Music was resonating throughout her room. Not too loud, because he hadn't detected it at the doorway, but his sensitive ears picked up every hard-hit guitar note.
She answered his unspoken question. "It's called "Careless Whisper", and its by Seether. And yes, I do listen to music."
Beast Boy smiled, baring his sharp teeth. "I didn't doubt you." His smile quickly faded as he let an apology slip onto his lips. "Look, Rae, I'm really sorry..."
Turning to face him, Raven blinked. Her eyes were suddenly bright with the candle light, and it was as if she was a different person. A happy person, if that was possible. "Will you dance with me? I love this song."
The man's scratchy singing voice wound around them as Beast Boy nodded, letting her meld herself into his arms. She wound her arms around his neck and looked up at him, he had finally gotten a growth spurt and stood a head taller than her, and he placed his hands under her cloak and at her hips.
She stepped closer to him than he expected her to, which made him close his eyes and accidentally bite his lower lip. He tried not to yip in pain, and felt heat resonate through his body. Especially in his cheeks, where he was positive he was blushing.
Peering up at him through her eyelashes, Raven finally smiled. "Thanks."
His eyes flew open, and his big green eyes shimmered with confusion. "Thanks? I insult you about something I positively adore about you, and you thank me? I deserve bruises." He said softly, watching her expression. She was so beautiful when she smiled.
"Why don't you smile more often?" He asked, when she didn't respond to him. "You're breathtaking."
Raven closed her eyes. "I don't have a lot of things to smile about." But the slight curve of her lips still lingered, and suddenly Beast Boy couldn't control himself.
He brought his hands up from her hips to hold her face. He leaned in close to her, and she spoke.
"What about Terra?"
What about Terra? Terra wanted to forget everything, and Beast Boy was forced to do the same. But losing Terra made him realize that she wasn't really meant for him. Those blue eyes were no match for the dark portals that lead to Raven's soul. There was no comparison, no competition. She was nobody to Beast Boy, where Raven was everything.
"Terra who?" He grinned as he closed the gap.
Her lips met his hesitantly, as he expected. He waited, and felt relived as her lips melted against his after a few moments. She smelled like lavender, and tasted like spices. A shock spread through him, making him let go of her face and wrap his arms around her shoulders. She pressed herself against him, craving as much as he was.
When he finally was able to part himself from her, he watched her expression. The smile was still there, small, but undeniable. Her eyes were still shut, and she was biting her lower lip.
"What was that for?" She was the first one to speak, and her eyes still weren't open.
Beast Boy didn't know what to say. He was silent, collecting his thoughts, but finally was able to talk after a moment of hesitation. He was suddenly unsure if she had even meant to kiss him back. "Rae, its always been you. The only reason Terra came into the picture was because I didn't think you...well, could be affectionate." He sighed. "And that's heartbreaking, loving someone unconditionally that can never love you back..."
Raven cut him off by crashing her lips onto his. "Who said I didn't love you back, you mutt?" She laughed after she pulled away from another lingering kiss.
Beast Boy whined, still a bit confused. But as the truth dawned on him, he was filled with warmth. A glow that made him radiate from the tip of his ears to his toes. "Rae..." He breathed, pulling her into a hug.
She sighed. "I do. Truly. I just always thought, because of Terra..."
Silencing her by placing a green finger against her mouth, Beast Boy spoke. "We don't need to dwell on the past. I have you now, and that's all that matters."
"The paths we took to this day don't matter. They shape us, but they do not define us." She muttered darkly, remembering her birthday and how her father had created a hell on Earth.
Beast Boy knew she was referring to her memories. "None of it was your fault, Rae. Your destiny couldn't be reversed, and everyone here knows that. We have faith in you, and that you can be good. That you are good. Robin, Star, Cy, and I have a great friend in you. And we love you. But I do especially." He laughed, letting a bit of his humor shine through.
She didn't laugh or crack a smile, but he saw a light in her dark eyes. She blinked prettily, pressing her lips together.
Kissing the top of her head, Beast Boy made a promise. "I swear I'll be by your side forever." He didn't dare say that he'd protect her, because she would probably make something explode in his face. But he would protect her.
He would protect her from her uncertainties.