To- Willow. Ehh, about the ShinoTema. It's just crack. It's not supposed to make sense. I got that pairing from some story I read that was on crack, and decided to put it in because I thought it was very amusing and wanted to give it a try.

Used- #87, bullets

.:雪:.

Chapter Three – I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love

.:雪:.

She didn't bother to take the elevator, instead choosing to run down the stairs, Itachi noted with slight surprise as he easily went after her.

She made it into the foyer, and she started to walk as normally as she could without attracting attention to herself.

Once they were out in the streets, she took off at an alarmingly fast pace.

He followed her all the way to the very edge of the Upper East Side where Hana finally stopped at a light, adjusting her scarf, seemingly very relaxed and not out of breath.

She moved on, this time walking quite leisurely before turning into a doorway.

He glanced up to look at the sign on the building.

'Miranda's Dresses' it was called.

Four mannequins were haphazardly wearing four garments that appeared to be hastily put on.

The glass door and behind the mannequins were blacked out by black-painted wood.

Resignedly, he wandered off to sit at a bench.

What could she have been doing that was so urgent and important? Surely it was not illegal or such to be so…secluded and awkwardly hidden.

"By Jashin, Itachi, what the fuck are you fucking doing here?"

The black-haired man looked up to see an irate Hidan carrying a curious black case.

"You looked like a freaking hobo, sitting there."

"What is in that case of yours, Hidan?"

"…why the hell not I tell you. It's a gun." the white-haired man declared proudly. "One I, hell- built myself for fun. You're right outside a freaking shooting gallery."

The other looked up at the odd building. "This one?"

"Yeah. One of the fucking best in town. It's called Miranda's Dresses, dumb shit of a name, but perfect cover. Not that it's illegal or anything, just that the owner would prefer that the cops didn't immediately beeline for the place if some fucking shooting happened. It's fucking brilliant, this place. All the shit you want free with membership, and she sells and rents out guns. What are you doing here, anyways?"

"I followed a girl here." Itachi said simply.

"What?" Hidan muttered in shock, staring at his friend as if he lost his head.

"She went inside." he jerked his head in to the doorway.

"…" Hidan's potty mouth hung open. "Are you serious you followed some girl here? You aren't shitting me, are you?"

"The only time I lied to you was when I told you ate rabbit when really you ate fried eel." the Uchiha had the gall to look amused.

"That was seriously fucking disgusting. I couldn't eat anything fucking properly for fucking weeks. I had to have a goddamn blender for all the crap I had to eat!" Hidan grimaced. "You seriously followed some girl all the way here?"

"Yes."

"I can't freaking believe it. You can come in with me. I wanna see this girl you bothered to follow."

The pair slipped inside.

The reception room was painted a cool grey, with racks of dresses in neat rows leading up to the front desk at the back.

A woman with spiky bottle-blonde hair looked up.

"Good afternoon, Hidan. Who are you, stranger?" she spoke with a lilt in her voice, as if she would rather be shooting than being receptionist.

"One of my best friends, Miranda. He's fine."

"Alright. Ivory is full, Surgery has just way too many sneaking in, but Venetian is free, with one person inside. Use that one."

"Thanks."

As the two men walked past, the Uchiha noted that the thing she was gazing down at was a dismantled pistol, and she was working at breakneck speed putting it all back together.

They walked past several rooms with reinforced windows, idly glancing at the people inside shooting giant targets.

"Those are for babies." Hidan snorted. "Shitty beginners. The targets are so big that they could build a fucking zeppelin with all that material."

They walked until the end of the hallway, with the white-haired man opening the door.

"Here. Wear these things otherwise your fucking eardrums will implode." he tossed a pair of earmuff to the other.

Itachi stood and watched in slight fascination as Hidan assembled all the metal bits together in his case, forming an impressively-simple-looking firearm.

"I know it looks fake or something, but this thing does not fuck around." he mouthed to Itachi.

The target was a tiny square of bright yellow silk the size of a quarter hanging on a thread and hook on from the ceiling.

Hidan gave a manic grin as he aligned himself with the teeny square, and fired.

Itachi blinked.

The scrap of silk was mere burnt flakes that floated slowly to the ground.

Hidan yanked off his headgear, Itachi poised to pull off his own.

"Isn't it aweso-"

A crack resounded off the walls, causing the white-haired man to curse.

"Hey, you bitch! You're supposed to wait thirty goddamn seconds after someone fucking fires!" Hidan yelled very loudly, enough for it to go through Itachi's earmuffs clearly.

"When did you start following the rules, babe?" a feminine voice responded coolly from the other side of the thick plastic screen that divided up the room. "And get my name right for once, will you?"

Itachi's skin prickled pleasantly at the sound of her voice and he unconsciously looked around for her figure.

But his mind raced a mile a minute. Hidan knew Hana?

"Fuck. Bambi. Sorry. Thought it was that cheap wannabe Candy." Hidan said sheepishly.

And why the hell were they using pet names for each other?

"Damn straight you should be sorry. Still on the silk, are you? Grow up, babe, and get used to the beautiful sound of beads already. Coming over to your side."

Before Itachi could breathe, the plastic was peeled back and Hana stepped out, her lovely face dropping into one of open shock.

Luckily, it was the trigger-happy male that unfroze things, picking up on the surprised face of his shooting-roommate, and the frozen stance of his best friend.

He smirked. "Hey, Bambi, your facial expression is very unbecoming these days, you know."

That snapped the brown-eyed girl back to normal. "Babe, there's nothing wrong with my facial expression."

"Not now. Was before." his grin settled wider. "Anyways, Bambi, this is Itachi, one of my best friends. Itachi, this is Hana, aka Bambi but you can't call her that cause that's my personal pet name for her, and she's my gun-roommate because no one except her can stand me."

"Mmhm. Now look, babe, and watch how the pros do it. Boys, cover your ears."

Unlike Hidan, who took a sturdy stance with two hands holding his gun, Hana lazily stood in front of the newly placed silk square, and fired with only a glance at her target and one hand on the metal.

The scrap was blown to flakes.

Itachi grimaced inwardly.

She was definitely not a woman to mess with.

But as she stood there, a teasing grin on her face, he couldn't help but feel as his brain fell blank and his heart jumped off a cliff.

"Anyways. I'm gonna continue my stuff. See you." she quickly squeezed back into her side of the room, and repeated thuds of the bullets were heard in rapid succession.

Hidan motioned to his friend to come out of the room.

As they stood in the hallway, Hidan laughed.

"Is Bambi the girl you were following?" he asked seriously after he settled down.

"Yes."

"You're not fucking around with me."

"I am not."

'…Holy shit you were following Bambi." Hidan gasped.

"Why do you call her that?" Itachi asked sharply.

"Why do you wanna know?" he responded cheekily.

"No reason."

"Tell me. I swear on Jashin that I won't tell. I'll even help you."

"Only if you tell me why you called Hana Bambi."

"Fair enough. I call her that because she's got brown eyes, and she looked really freaked out on her first day here, like a deer. So therefore I called her Bambi. Now spill."

"…I met her yesterday."

"And?"

"I wish for her to have a meal with me."

"Is that it?"

"As much as I will divulge for now."

"Fine. I'm going back in."

Just as he said that, Hana walked out, looking tired, her hair mussed, her clothes rumpled, and faint bluish bruises on her pale hands.

"Good luck." the white-haired man ducked back in.

He approached her quietly.

"I suppose you have time now?" he said softly.

She spun to face him, confusion marring her fox-like features.

"Oh! But I have to pick up my br-" she stammered, but was firmly cut off.

"Your brother is perfectly fine."

"Look, Itachi, you've got some child-bride. I don't touch married men." she said harshly, tugging carelessly on the safety on her gun.

He was confused for a second, and chuckled darkly.

"That I can explain to you, if you can join me for a late lunch." he cajoled.

As if on cue, her stomach growled, and she cursed.

"Okay, fine. I'll have lunch with you." she grumbled. "Anything goes. Just give me a minute to put my stuff away."

She cracked her fingers, and walked towards a locker room that was visible through a window.

He sighed.

Ino was messing with minds again.

He was going to have to reprimand for that, because he nearly lost his chance with Hana.

She emerged, carrying a large navy and white tote bag.

"I'm ready."

She had left her hair mussed, as if she didn't care, and her clothes were slightly straightened out.

They left a smirking Hidan in the background.

He grinned as he reloaded.

.:雪:.

The chapter title is reference to My Chemical Romance's first album of the same name.

No translations needed today. :D

Review?

:E hypheniated