Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight

Important Author's Note:

Incest is a very sensitive subject to a lot of people. As a catholic, I was always taught that incest is taboo. I don't condone incest at all regardless of the plot of my story. I expect, for some reason, to get thrashed by a lot of readers that would probably hate this plot and my writing and get bad reviews for it. It's ok, we live in America after all and we all have the rights to speak out. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. However, this story wasn't written to disrespect anyone whatsoever. It's just simply an idea that came to me.

This particular story has it's own original characters, however, I decided to re-write it using the Twilight characters to serve as a test run on my story.

Thank you.

Chapter 1 - Reacquainted

BPOV

"Bella, hurry up! We have to be at the airport in 2 hours!" Renee hollered through the intercom in my room.

"I'll be down in a sec!" I pressed the button on the annoying box against the wall and responded.

My mom has been frantically running around the house trying to prepare for her sister and my cousin's arrival from New York.

Two months ago Renee and Charlie decided to move to New York to be closer to Renee's sister, Esme, her husband, Carlisle and their son, Edward. Now Esme and Edward are on their way to Forks to travel with us and help us with the big move to New York.

Throughout the years I must have only seen Aunt Esme and Uncle Carlisle approximately about five times but the last time I saw Edward was 11 years ago back when we were only five when they still used to live in Forks.

In spite of the distance and lack of communication, or none at all we've had over the years, the memories of our childhood together were still clear in my mind.

We had sort of a love-hate relationship and we used to fight a lot, Edward and I. Edward was a bully and bossy even as a little boy, and he had a habit of pulling my hair just to make me cry which was his way of showing me affection. The funny thing was, in spite of his arrogance, he always protected and took care of me in his own way. And even then, I always felt a strong bond between us.

I remember when we were four, Edward and I were playing in the Cullen's backyard which stretched out to the forest. I wanted to play in the tree house that Charlie and Carlisle built for us and was hauling a bunch of mine and Edward's toys with our Radio Flyer wagon to bring up to the treehouse. When we got to the tree where the treehouse was located, Edward and I climbed up carefully with him following behind me. I wanted to decorate the treehouse to make it cozy and Edward instructed me to stay in the treehouse while he climbed back down to get our toys. Once all the toys were brought up and we had the treehouse fully decorated to our liking, I got an idea and turned to Edward.

"Eddie, you want to play house? I'll be mommy and you'll be the daddy, ok?" I said hopeful that he would play along.

"Sure, Bells. Sounds like fun!" He responded with a huge grin on his little face.

Just then Edward's neighbor, Mikey, decided to join us. Once Mikey was up in the treehouse with us he looked around and asked, "Whatcha' doing?"

"We're playing house and I'm the mommy and Edward is the daddy." I said

"But I want to be the daddy, Bella!" Mikey responded heatedly and glaring at Edward who had a smug look on his face.

"Nuh-uh, she want's me to be the daddy. So I'm the daddy." Edward retaliated just as he started to step in between me and Mike.

"Edward, you can't be the daddy! You two are cuuzins!" Mike argued.

Edward frowned and said, "So what?!? I can still be the daddy and it's better me than you!"

I cleared my throat to get their attention as I could tell they were about to get into a fight. I got in between them and took turns looking at both of them.

"We don't have to play house. We can play something else, ok?" I said hoping we could come into a compromise.

"No! I want to play house and I want to be the daddy!" Edward said as he to pulled me roughly to him. Because of my clumsiness, I ended up losing my balance and fell face first on the wooden floor but not before I hit my head on the small plastic table next to me.

I shrieked and next thing I knew I was sprawled on the floor sobbing loudly and whimpering with tears streaming down my face clutching my head.

"Oh Bella!" Edward panicked and knelt down to help me up, "I'm so-s-s-sorry! I didn't mean it. I promise!"

But before Edward could help me up, Mike shoved Edward away from me and pulled me to his lap to try to comfort me.

"Sshh, it's ok Bells. Don't cry anymore. You want me to punch him for you?" Mikey said as he rocked me back and forth.

"Mike, I want to hold Bella. Get away from her! She's mine!" Edward sat in front of me and Mike as he tried to pry me off of Mike and failing miserably.

I looked at Mike with teary eyes and gave him a small smile and turned to look at Edward. His tiny arms held out to me. His eyes pleading for me to go to him. I crawled out of Mikey's lap and onto Edward's lap and looked at his face with a faint smile on my face.

"I'm really sorry, Bella. I really didn't mean it." Edward pleaded as he took me in his little arms.

"It's ok, Edward. I'm ok. I forgive you." I reassured him.

"Hhmph!" Mike grunted and crossed his tiny arms across his chest glaring at Edward.

Edward pulled me closer to him and held me while brushing my hair away from my face looking at Mike smugly.

"I'm really sorry, Bellie. I didn't mean to hurt you." Edward said softly and gave me a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

"We can just play something else and you and Mikey can be my brothers instead of daddy, ok?" I said hoping to stop what started this mess in the first place.

Edward looked dejected and eyed me with a frown, "But I really want to be the daddy and you the mommy, Bella, pwweaase. Just like when you and me get married when we grow up."

I furrowed my brow and looked at him. "But Edward, we can't get married silly! We're cuuzins, remember? You're like my brother or something." I giggled.

Mike started laughing and decided to pull me back to his lap but Edward wouldn't give, holding me even tighter and slightly turning our bodies away from Mike.

"Hey!" Edward glared at Mike for trying to steal me away from his lap.

"We can to, Bellie! I want to marry you when we're old and 13!" Edward said determinedly and looking into my teary eyes.

"No she won't because she will marry me first!" Mike decided to interject.

I decided then that this had to stop. I didn't want to get married when I turn 13! Boys have cooties and I don't want to get cooties. I don't want to marry Edward because he's a meany sometimes and I don't want to marry Mikey either because he's Mikey and he has more cooties than Edward!

I stood up and looked down at both of them. "I don't want to get married and you can't make me!" I yelled at both of them and turned away to leave.

I started to climb down the tree to get away from Edward and Mike. Just as I was about to reach the ground, I heard the boys yelling at each other.

"You see what you did, Edward?!?"

"Me?!? It's your fault! Who invited you anyways?!?"

They were still yelling at each other with their voices fading away in the background as I ran back to the house.

Aunt Esme was in the kitchen when I walked in through the patio doors. She gave me a quick glance and noticed my appearance.

"What happened, sweetheart?" She came up to me and knelt down in front of me so that we were face to face.

"Edward said I have to marry him when I turn 13. And Mikey said Edward can't because he will marry me instead," I said trying to rush out the words in panic, "but I don't want to get married, Aunt Esme. They have cooties!" I looked at her with pleading eyes.

She giggled. "Oh honey, don't worry about that at all. It won't and can't happen because Edward is your cousin." She said reassuringly. "But you can marry any other nice boy when you're all grown up and when you're ready." She gave me a peck on the cheek and went back to whatever it was that she was doing on the kitchen counter.

"Ok." I sighed and said in a small voice looking down at my feet.

When it was finally decided that we were moving to New York, I was ecstatic! I've lived in Forks practically my whole life and the thought of moving to a big city was something I've always dreamt of doing when I got older. Unfortunately, living in New York also meant living close to Edward. Ugh! I can't stand him sometimes. Even just the mere thought of being in the same room with him made my stomach turn. I have been looking forward to our move to New York but I can't help but feel torn about having to see Edward on a regular basis. From what I've learned, he hasn't changed much. Edward is still arrogant and self-centered who thinks he's god's gift to women.

I took a last glance at the mirror, feeling satisfied, I headed downstairs. Renee was waiting by the front door with her hands on her hips and impatiently tapping her left foot.

"Finally!" she said exasperatedly.

"Let's go, mom." I said with a sigh, holding the urge to roll my eyes.

Our drive to SeaTac was uneventful. Renee kept blabbering about her plans and the parties that she will be attending and throwing once we settle in NY and I found myself just tuning her out and watching the blur of trees on my side of the window.

I was still lost in my thoughts when we finally pulled up at the airport parking lot.

The airport monitor announced the arrival of their flight and I can't help the knots tightening in my stomach. Why am I so nervous? It's not like we're still five and I don't expect him to pull my hair just to make me cry like he used to. So what the hell is wrong with me?!? We're 16 now for crying out loud!

Next thing I knew, Renee was bouncing up and down next to me and waving her arms frantically towards the escalator. My mom only acted this way when it came to Aunt Esme, it almost made her likeable. Almost. Travelers were making their way down the escalator to meet friends and families. Then I felt someone watching me. When I looked up I saw a tall, bronze-haired boy with the most beautiful grayish-blue eyes just staring intensely at me. My heart felt like it wanted to jump out of my chest. He was beautiful with strong chiseled jaws and a body that looked like he just came out of an Abercombie photo shoot. His bronze hair was a crown of mess but it totally worked for him giving him that boy-next-door look.

I was pulled out of my trance as Renee started dragging me towards the direction of the bronze-haired boy. "Esme!" Renee squealed out and pulled my aunt into a tight hug who was standing right next to Mr. A&F model-look-alike. I realized then who this bronze-haired boy was. No frikking way!

"Bella dear, how are you?" Esme gave me a hug next.

"I'm good, Aunt Esme." I responded with a warm smile and feeling self conscious from Edward's gaze.

"Edward!" Renee turned to hug him.

"Hi, Aunt Renee." Edward responded with a dazzling smile returning the hug.

"How are you, sweetheart?" Renee asked.

"I'm good, Aunt Renee. It's nice to see you." Edward responded.

Then Renee turned to me and said, "You remember your cousin Bella, right?".

"Of course." Edward said with a warm smile turning to me and giving me a tight hug.

"Hi, Edward." I said with a smile.

"How have you been, Bella?" Edward said next, looking into my eyes and giving me a crooked smile.

Whoa!

My breath hitched and my stomach couldn't decide whether it wanted to do flip flops or run to the bathroom and pee.

"F-f-fine." Was all I could stammer out feeling the blood rushing to my cheeks.

Really funny, God! He's my cousin!

He then came up to me and gave me a soft kiss on the cheek. "I can see you haven't changed one bit. Only.. more beautiful. And still blushing." Edward whispered softly in my ear so only I could hear.

When he finally pulled back, I slowly let out the breath that I didn't realize I was holding and gave him a faint smile and looked away.

"Let's go kids." Renee said as we headed to the baggage claim.

On our drive home, I sat in the back seat with Edward. We chatted on and off while in between silence I felt him constantly watching me.I found myself trying to avoid from looking at Edward unless he spoke to me. The air between us was thick and awkward. I didn't know what to make of it and I was starting to feel really uncomfortable.

We pulled up to my long driveway an hour and a half later.

Once we were all settled inside, Renee and Esme decided to make a feast for dinner while Edward and I hung out by the pool in my backyard. It's now June and the weather in Forks is warm. It's the only time of the year that we get some sun and I try to enjoy the nice weather as much as I can.

Edward and I were sitting by the lounge chairs and just reacquainting ourselves with each other. After a few minutes, Edward stood up and asked if I wanted a drink, "Iced tea, please", I said smiling up at him.

Within minutes, he was back with drinks in his hands.

"So…" Edward said as he handed me my iced tea with a mischievous smile ghosting his lips, "what do you do around here for fun?"

"Not much really." I said. "There's some bars and an under-age club by Port Angeles which is about 45 miles away from Forks.

"Maybe we can hit the club one night before we all leave for NY?" Edward said.

"Sure, why not." I responded.

"So.. Bella.. do you have a boyfriend?" Edward asked.

I looked at him and found him staring at me. My heart skipped a beat and I found myself staring into his gorgeous eyes.

"Umm.. no. Not right now." I said barely a whisper trying to look anywhere but his face.

I was dating this boy, Gabriel, from school but decided to end it before the school was over. I figured since I'm moving to NY there's really no point of keeping the relationship. Long distance relationship just don't work for me.

He smiled his crooked smile and said, "Good. I wouldn't want to have to deal with swatting some flies away from you, if you know what I mean?"

I furrowed my brows slightly at his comment. "What do you mean?" I said, "I don't need a bodyguard. I can take care of myself and I have been for the past 11 years."

"Ahh, true, but now that we'll be living close to each other and seeing each other all the time, I'm afraid I will not be able to help myself from protecting my beautiful cousin from some assholes who would probably only want one thing. It comes in territory." He said in a serious tone but with a devilish grin.

"Whatever, Edward." I said looking at my hands that was resting on my lap.

"Just remember, Bella, from now on, I will be watching out for you." He said as he took my right hand and held it. "You're too beautiful and precious for me to be taken advantage of by some asshole. Men in NY are a lot more aggressive and they love sweet and innocent girls like you. Trust me."

The thought of seeing Edward regularly and us living close to each other suddenly made me giddy. However, I didn't know if I should feel excited or annoyed with the thought of him hovering over me.

"Are you always this protective of your female relatives?" I asked curious.

"No, I can honestly say that I'm not. I am, however, protective and possessive of those whom I care about." He said. "You, Bella, is special. I know we haven't seen each other for a few years. But I've always felt protective of you even when we were children. I've always been drawn to you. I've missed you." He said the last words in a whisper as he held my gaze.

I felt my cheeks getting hot and through my periphery I saw his left hand making it's way to my cheek to caress it with the back of his fingers.

I raised my head slowly to look at him. "Beautiful." He sighed to himself that I almost didn't hear it.

Suddenly he clapped his hands together as if he just thought of something brilliant. "How about a swim?" Edward asked with a mischievous smile.

"Sure, why not. But you go ahead. I'll follow in a bit." I said to as he got up and headed back to the house to change into his swimwear.

I'm not sure if I can be near Edward in just my bikinis just yet. He's acting really strange and I'm not sure what to make of it. He's my cousin. He's my cousin. He's my cousin. I found myself repeating these words over and over again in my head. Maybe it's just my imagination. There's no way Edward would be attracted to me. Not only because we're cousins but just because… well, look at me! I'm me! Plain old Bella. Why would anyone like Edward even pay attention to someone like me? I let out sigh. But he's Edward and he's so beautiful. I can't help but wonder how things would have been like if we weren't related. Would he even bother looking my way?

Life is so unfair. Of all people in the world, I have to be attracted to my cousin. I tried to convince myself that it's just nerves. The move to a new city and reacquainting with my long lost relative is just doing a number on me. There's just so much going on and I'm sure it will dissipate once I'm settled in my new home. All these excitement is causing me to think irrationally.

I decided to join Edward for a swim and change into my bikini. I went back to the house and up to my room. I put on my black 2 piece string Chloe bikini that says "Chloe" in silver bold print on the back of my bikini bottom. It's one of my favorite swimwear. I put my hair up in a ponytail, grabbed my black flip-flops and Gucci beach towel and headed back downstairs. I stopped by the kitchen first on my way to the backyard to see how Renee and Esme were doing with dinner.

"You ladies need some help?" I asked as I stood behind our huge granite counter watching my mom and aunt giggling to themselves, no doubt in their own little world.

Renee and Esme have always been close in spite of being polar opposites. Esme is very warm, approachable and motherly while Renee can be such a snob and unapproachable. My mother's side of the family was well off and both Renee and Esme were left with an abundance amount of money inherited from my grandparents when they passed away. Neither Esme, Renee, Edward nor I will have to work as long as we live if we chose to and there will still be plenty of money to go around for the next generation and the generations to come there after. Unfortunately, having money has given Renee an intolerable personality. Her social status is by far and foremost her priority, second to me and Charlie that is. My mother knows she got it and often enough, she flaunts it. Her money talks for her.

Coming from a wealthy family, I resentfully always have to maintain a good public image either in school or social gatherings. It's a lifestyle that I never got used to and can't wait to leave behind once I'm on my own and away for college.

"No, honey. Go ahead and hang out with your cousin and enjoy. We should be done shortly. We'll call you kids when food is ready". Renee said with a grin.

"Ok, mom."

Edward was waiting for me in the pool when I came out. When I stepped out of the patio door, Edward turned to look at me. His eyes wide as saucers while he slowly looked me over from head to toe. He swam to the edge of the pool never taking his eyes off me as if he was under a spell.

"Why don't you take a picture? It will last longer." I said as I felt myself blushing.

I suddenly had the urge to take my towel and wrap it around my body tightly. His gaze was truly making me feel self-conscious and uncomfortable.

Then Edward cleared his throat and said, "It's just… uhmm, well, are you coming to join me?" He smiled devilishly.

I stood up and walked towards the deep end of the pool. I could feel his eyes following my every move. Edward's eyes has turned a darker shade, it's now a more grayish color and I couldn't make out the expression on his face.

I dove into the deep end and swam across to the other end of the pool ignoring my idiotic teenage-hormonal cousin. I consider myself a good swimmer. I was in the swim team in my school and because of my clumsiness, I took pride for being a graceful and fast swimmer. I swam 5 laps across the pool and almost forgot about my audience. Almost.

When I was done with my laps, I swam towards Edward with a smug look on my face.

Edward was still just staring at me in awe.

"Edward, are you ok?" I asked amused.

"Uhh..yeah. I'm fine. Just thinking." He said as he furrowed his brows slightly.

"That's pretty impressive, Bella". Edward finally said, unleashing his signature crooked smile. What's up with that smile? I wonder if he even knew what that smile did to the women he uses it on? I'm beginning to debate if I want to slap it off his face or take my panties off whenever he unleashed that crooked smile on me. It's like a spell and I was getting irritated with how I reacted to it.

"Uhm, thanks, I'm in the swim team in school. It's the only athletic sport I am good at." I said smiling coyly.

"Kids, dinner is ready!" Esme popped her head out of the patio doors.

We got out of the pool and just before I could grab my towel, Edward picked it up, came up behind me and wrapped it around my shoulders. I felt his warm breath as his lips brushed the soft hollow behind my ear and whispered, "You truly are beautiful, Bella."

I shivered and my heart started to race erratically.

Edward then turned to me and held out his right hand for me to grab. "Lets go, Bella." He took my left hand and lead me back inside the house. Really now. What is going on?!?

Once inside, I went upstairs to my room to put on a pair of my distressed cut-off denim shorts and a black camisole. I gave myself a few minutes to calm my heart before heading back downstairs.

I ended up sitting across from Edward. Charlie finally came home right before we all sat down for dinner greeting Edward and Esme.

"It's too bad Carlisle couldn't make it." Charlie started the conversation with Esme.

"He's really busy in the hospital and unfortunately, one of his colleague is also on vacation so it just wasn't possible for him to take the time off at this time." Esme responded sadly.

Edward stiffened at the mention of his dad but kept a blank expression on his face.

The adults fell in their own world conversing about our move while Edward and I ate our dinner in silence and remained deep in our thoughts. Every once in a while I would feel Edward watching me and I did my best to ignore him. When dinner was over, I took it upon myself to help and wash the dirty dishes while Charlie, Renee and Esme went to the living room to chat and watch some TV. Usually we have a maid to do the chores, but Renee decided to give her a day off today wanting to just spend some quality time in the kitchen with Esme.

"I'll help you, Bella." Edward offered.

I pre-rinsed the dirty dishes in the sink while Edward placed them in the dishwasher. All the while Edward telling silly jokes causing a fit of giggles from me resulting for our chore to take longer to finish. Every so often I would turn to look at Edward only to find him watching me which made me very self-conscious. We were just about done with the dishes when Edward reached out to tuck some of my hair behind my ear. I looked up to find gazing at me, his eyes intense and a faint smile ghosting his lips.

Suddenly I felt my cell vibrated in my pocket. The caller ID read Gabriel Calling.

"Hi, Gabe." I greeted.

"Hey, babe. I was just wondering what you're up to? I really miss you." Gabriel responded, his voice had a hint of sadness to it.

I looked at Edward only to find him watching me as he sat on the bar stool. His brows knitted together and fists clenched in front of him on the kitchen counter.

I turned away from him as I spoke to Gabriel. "Oh, nothing much. My cousin and my aunt are here from NY. They're helping us with the move and will be traveling with us back to NY."

"So I guess you can't come out and play, huh? I was just hoping we can hang out before you leave. I was hoping you would spend the rest of your days here in Forks with me before you leave."

I sighed. I love Gabriel. He's my bestfriend and he had been my boyfriend since we were freshman. Things between Gabriel and I have been difficult since our family decided to move. Gabriel has taken things even harder when I decided to break up with him. However, I didn't feel it would be fair to either one of us knowing how difficult it is to be in a long distance relationship. I just couldn't do that to Gabe, as hard as it was for me, I wanted him to move on.

"Ok, Gabe, I'll see what I can do, ok? We'll try to spend time as much as we can before I leave. But the next couple of days might be difficult, however, as soon as my schedule is free, I'll call you." I said with a smile.

"Great! That's all I ask." He sounded a lot happier, "I'll see you in a couple of days, sweetheart. I love you."

"Love you too. See you soon" I said as I got off my phone.

When I turned back to Edward he looked angry and deep in thought.

"Hey, what's wrong?" I asked, placing my hand on his arm.

Edward just looked at me, "I thought you didn't have a boyfriend?" He said through clenched teeth.

"I-uhm, I don't. We broke up. I can't handle long distance relationships." I said quietly unsure of why I suddenly felt as if I did something wrong.

"So, what does he fucking want? And what's with the 'I love you' bit?" Edward responded still looking like he was about to hit something.

"Edward, Gabe is my bestfriend and I do still love him. It doesn't mean because I broke up with him I can't stay friends with him. What's wrong with you?" I asked now getting annoyed with the interrogation. It's almost as if he was jealous.

Edward got up from the stool and stood in front of me. "I'm sorry, love." His hands came up to caress my cheek as he slowly moved closer so that our nose were almost touching.

"I just can't stand the thought of someone else having you." Edward whispered as he closed his eyes and sighed.

I was dumbfounded. My heart was beating so fast I could hear it in my ears.

Then he smiled and said, "Bella, I will finish the dishes. You should go and get ready for bed. I'm hoping you can take me on a tour of Forks tomorrow and I want to leave early."

I hesitantly smiled back, "Uhm, ok." I said in a small voice and turned and walked towards the stairs.

When I was finally alone in my room I couldn't help but go over the series of events that happened today. Edward's behavior has left me utterly confused. I found myself warring over his unusual and seemingly inappropriate behavior. Yet the other part of me kept telling me, "It's nothing, it's harmless. It's all in your head. It's just like when you were five." But that's just it, we were only five then so it was all innocent. But this time we're both 16, almost 17, so Edward's strange and inappropriate behavior towards me could only be either harmful or harmless to both of us.

I sighed and walked to my dresser and got my favorite navy blue 'boyfriend' sweat pants from Victoria's Secret and a white tank top. I grabbed my toiletries and headed to my bathroom. I took a quick shower, brushed my teeth and went back to my room. I wasn't tired or sleepy yet and being that it was such a nice breezy summer night, I decided to leave my balcony doors open and do some reading in my bed. I was just halfway through the 1st chapter of my book when I heard a soft knock on my door. Before I could respond, my door opened slightly and Edward poked his head in.

"Bella, can I come in?" Edward asked.

"Sure, Edward, come on in." I said as I sat up and leaned against my headboard.

"What's up?" I asked.

He sat on the edge of my bed looking at me. "Nothing much. Just wanted to see you before you go to bed." He said with a smile.

"What are you reading?" He asked curious. His eyebrow lifted as he looked at my book.

"Jack and Josie." I said all of a sudden feeling the blood creeping up to my cheeks. Of all the books that I had to be reading right at that moment, it had to be a book about incest. Stupid Bella.

"Pretty good book, I liked the plot. It's actually one of my favorite." He responded enjoying my discomfort. "So, how do you like it?" He asked.

"Uhh, I-ah, I like it so far. Although, I just started reading it and I'm really curious with how it'll all turn out for the characters."

"Hhmm, so what do you think of incest?" He asked looking at me intently.

I suddenly shivered, my hands and toes started to feel cold. I now regretted wearing just a tank top and wishing I wore a thick wool turtle neck sweater instead.

"E-e-excuse me?" I asked trying not to sound nervous but failing miserably.

"You know, incest, an intimate relationship between close relatives?" He said with a serious tone not breaking eye contact with me.

I looked down at my lap, caressing the flower print on the cover of my book. "I know what incest mean." I said softly. "I-I'm not sure. I mean, there's always a reason why incest happens between 2 people. It's certainly not normal but it happens." I answered looking back up at him.

He smiled that crooked smile again and just studied my face before responding.

"To most, incest is bad, out of the norm and forbidden. It's a taboo really in most societies. However, we can't stop who our heart calls to. Unfortunately, the more we pull away from something or someone we're not allowed to have, the stronger the that desire calls to us. Don't you agree?"

I furrowed by brows and said, "I understand what you're saying. A-a-about our heart not choosing who it wants to love, I mean. But unfortunately, to most of us, incest is not something that's acceptable. I do sympathize with those who are in those complicated relationships and situations though, unless of course it's only out of pure sex which is sick. But loving someone you're not allowed to or supposed to in an intimate way due to their relation must be devastating and difficult. "

He took my hand and started to draw soft circles on my palm with his thumb. "Bella", he whispered, "sometimes even all the pain in the world is worth it if only to be with the person that is meant for you. Regardless. Who. It. Is." He said in a whisper as he stared intently into my eyes. My breath hitched. His eyes full of emotions.

This can't be happening. Edward can't be implying something. This is so wrong. He's my cousin... What would Renee, Esme, Carlisle and Charlie think?!? What would Renee do if she found out?!? Why is this happening? Is it me? Am I doing something to provoke this? What have I done? I need to stop this. I need to figure out why this is happening and if I'm causing all these inappropriate behavior. I have to be the most horrible person to be sending off some kind of inappropriate signals to my own cousin. My own cousin! God, I don't want to go to hell..Why else would he be acting this way towards me? I could only assume I did something to provoke it. A-ha! It's because I kept staring at him with goo-goo eyes, isn't it?!? That had to be it! Stupid, stupid Bella! You've done it now. I think I'm going to be sick..

Edward slowly moved closer to me. I froze. "E-e-Edward..wha-" I said softly but I couldn't continue. His closeness overwhelmed me as his lips brushed my forehead like butterfly wings and made it's way slowly down to my jaw. I closed my eyes. My heart beating frantically against my chest. Then he pulled back slowly but stood only inches away from my face. His eyes sad but full of love as he stared at me. "Bella", he whispered ever so softly, "I want to be close to you." He sighed. His sweet warm breath blowing on my face. "I-I just want to be close to you. Please let me," he said still in a whisper, "I will never do anything to hurt you. I can't explain what's happening. But whatever it is, I can't stop it even if I wanted to." He closed his eyes as if willing me to feel what he's feeling.

I stayed quiet for a moment just studying his face. I wanted to reach up and caress his cheek, run my thumb across his eyes lids and his lips. I wanted to run my fingers through his hair and comfort him. I wanted so much answers for a thousand questions that are now running through my mind. But most of all, I wanted to ask him if I was right about what he's feeling towards me? But I couldn't. I was terrified to know the answer to that most important question.

"I'm scared, Edward. I'm not sure of what. But I'm terrified of these unknown feelings that seem to be lingering between us. It just doesn't seem right." It was all I could say without crossing the line between heaven and hell. I couldn't say more because I couldn't accept anymore than what I was ready for at that moment.

"Don't be, love. It will work itself out in the end. I won't hurt you. Just, please, don't push me away." He then kissed me on the cheek softly.

"I should let you go to bed now." He said.

"Goodnight, my sweet innocent Bella".

"Goodnight, Edward".

He walked to my door and closed the door behind him with a soft click.

I found myself letting out the breath that I didn't realize I was holding. I suddenly felt a headache coming on. My legs will not hold me up if I get up to get some Tylenol so I decided to calm myself down and wait it out. Hopefully it will go away by the time I fall asleep.

I sat on my bed dumbfounded. It must have taken me 20 minutes to finally calm down and start to think coherently. My thoughts were all over the place.

One thing I know for sure, my move to NY will turn my world upside down.

I stared at my book for a few more minutes just shaking my head slowly from side to side as if willing myself to believe that all of what had just happened was only a dream.

There's so much emotions inside me that wants to burst out. Shock, happiness, confusion, fear and love. Thinking about this situation terrifies me. I can't deny that I am attracted to Edward. There's such a strong pull that draws me to him as well. But I'm terrified that we both will get hurt in the end. How will this work out for both of us? And how far will we be willing to go?

I lay down on my pillow, put my book on my bedside table and prepared myself for a dreamless sleep. I suddenly felt so tired as if the weight of the world was on my shoulders.

I found myself finally drifting off to sleep with only one thing in mind.

Edward.