Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.

Warning: Yaoi and a horribly written fic.

Chapter 1: Meeting

"Grimmjow,"

"Yes, Ulqui?"

"Could you please let me go this instant?"

"Let me think about it,"

"…" Gah.

"No."

"…" This is so humiliating.

Grimmjow, who forced Ulquiorra to sit on his lap, had been nuzzling his Ulqui's neck for the past ten minutes. Who knew those two would get together?

The two lov - er, arrancars were waiting for their subordinates in the meeting room. Another meeting, probably a pointless one, was announced by Gin. A few were already there, namely Halibel, Barragan – both looking very bored and a sleeping Stark.

"Hellooooo my little ducklings!" Gin suddenly opened the two big doors with a bang, causing Stark to wake up.

"Wuh?"

"Stark, dear, wipe yer' drool, please. It's disgusting."

"Oh."

"Grimm-chan, Ulqui-chan. Make love later, we have work to do,"

Said arrancars immediately separated, blushing. Both were now in their own seats.

"Okay, my darlings let us begin,"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"..zz"

"Erm, Ichimaru-sama?" Ulquiorra spoke up.

"Yes, Ulqui-chan?"

"The others aren't here, yet."

"Oh, yer right. Might as well call 'em,"

A cough.

"OI! COME DOWN HERE OR I'LL STALK YA' FER' THE REST OF YOUR ARRANCAR LIVES!"

A minute passed.

An earthquake.

Stampede.

Some shouting and yelling.

Chairs being dragged.

Rustles.

And voilà!

Instant espadas.

.

"Good. We're all set. Now let's start this meeting."

Gin bent down, brought out a projector containing who-knows-what. (Probably something embarrassing and weird.) It was turned on by remote the former shinigami was holding from the very beginning of this story.

"As you can see, Aizen-sama is not 'ere. He's… on leave right now,"

"He is?" Someone – Nnoitra butted in.

"Yep, he is. You all might be wondering why I, the amazing Ichimaru Gin, called ya' on an urgent meeting today."

"…Not really," Gimmjow muttered absent mindedly. You called us on a freakin' meeting two days ago! Warning us about the importance of 'safe sex' and all that shit. Who cares!? Screw safe sex!

..On the bright side, it was nice seeing Ulquiorra blush for two whole glorious hours. I could just –

The teal haired man felt something or someone poking him on the ribs. He looked at the source of the annoying gesture. Ready to strangle whoever dared disturb him from his (perverted) thoughts.

Rather, he was greeted by a death glare coming from Ulquiorra. That says, "Stop it or no sex for a month."

.

The Sexta Espada resisted the urge to whimper and beg for forgiveness. He can't take this kind of torture! Away from his cute lover would be hell, a–and that would mean no one will protect him from the evil enigmas lurking in the darkness.

What if someone kidnaps Ulquiorra? What if other arrancar/shinigami/hallow took him away? What if–

"Did you say something, Grimmjow?" The sickly sweet voice of Gin echoed through the thick walls of the room.

Snapping out of his... thought rambling, the said espada lowered his head and uttered a silent, "No."

"As I was saying, I called a meeting 'cause I'll be showing you a video message from Aizen-sama and how yer' all involved."

With a silent 'click'. A video played on the wide white screen on the front of the long table.

A tired looking Aizen was seen, tied up on a chair and he appeared to be reading a piece of paper clutched tightly between his two hands.

"Uh… hello, my dear espada! When you receive this message, this clearly states that every single one of you is going to have a day off and… Erm, Gin?" Their leader looked up, shifting his gaze to his left.

"What!?" An angry voice retorted.

"Err, why does this say I'm going on a trip to Mount Fuji to train monkeys?"

"Just read, dammit!"

"And I am going to Mount Fuji to train mokeys. Bye!" Aizen said, hurriedly. He looked scared, honestly.

The video ended.

An awkward silence emitted from the group.

.

"A… day off?" Szayel blurted, unbelievably. Breaking the uncouth situation.

The very familiar grim widened, "Yes, my dear, a day off! More likely a week off! I requested (forced) Aizen-sama to extend your vacation. All of you look exhausted,"

More awkward silence.

Most of them look like fish out of water.

No. Way. They were having a week off. Aizen didn't even allow them to sleep eight hours a day.

The silence, yet again, was broken by loud screams and murmurs.

"NO WAY! THIS IS SO COOL!" (Nnoitra)

"Now I can get my nails done properly." (Halibel)

"I can sleep more!" (Guess who)

Gin sighed happily. It was such a beautiful sight seeing his adorable espada jump for joy and happiness.

On the other side of the room, Ulquiorra exhaled wearily. He had a bad feeling about this.

This is going to be one hell of a week.

My 2nd fic. Deleted the 1st one.

I'm still not used to writing fan fiction of my own. Don't sue me, please.

And, what's a beta reader? I've been reading fics for almost a year now; I still don't know what a beta reader is. I'm too lazy to read FAQs. HAHAHAHA.

Review!