"Captain's Log: Day 42. We've been rationing food for eleven days now and today we will run out. Needless to say the crew and I are not in the best condition. Tempers are running high, and I sense from the way everyone's staring at me while they hold pointy rocks that I will most likely be dinner tonight."

***

"Damn it, Spock, I'm a doctor, not a cannibal!"

"Doctor McCoy, just take the arm and eat it. It's only logical that we keep up our strength."

"Fine! But what I want to know is why we didn't just kill that herd of deer over there."

"..."

***

"Captain's Log: Day 50. Ensign What's-his-name lasted us longer than we thought. We have also been using his red shirt to keep our fire going. Thank God he was over weight."

***

"Oh my God, this is sooooo good! Pass me some more of those finger sandwiches!"

"Uhura, that's disgusting. And anyway, you've already had three of them."

"Well, he had seven more of them, didn't he?"

"..."

***

It was Wednesday when Chekov bit the dust. No pointy rocks were needed this time. There were many cheers around the make-shift camp. There'd be food today!

"McCoy! We got another one!"

A sigh was heard. "I'm comin', I'm comin'," he said as he picked up his pointy rock.

Another day, another body.

He then proceeded to cut up the young officer into sections, or what the crew had decided to name the body parts. Arm: chicken, Leg: ham, Foot: cow, Fingers: fingers, Toes: toes...they got lazy with the naming after a while.

***

"Captain's Log: Day 61. After a long winter in the Sierra Nevada, the snow is finally thawing. We just might make it to our check point after all. Except poor Chekov...I wonder where he went..."

***

"We made it!" yelled a red shirted fellow, running towards the station.

He got eaten by a bear.

***

"Captain's Log: Star Date: 1436. 3. We have made it back to the Enterprise and everyone seems to be doing well. Of course we all mourn for the loss of Chekov, but it was his own fault for wandering off. We never did find him. The only big difference I can see is that Uhura keeps going up behind people's back with her old 'pointy rock.' I've set my phaser to stun. All in all, we can always say that it was a learning exper--"

"Got 'im!" yelled Uhura, triumphantly carrying away the Captain, pointy rock in hand.