Title: Lifetime: Pt. III - Resurrection

Author's Note: Thank you to JB for the beta. This is a companion piece/sequel to "Awakenings" which was originally posted in 2005. This sequel has been a long time coming.

Disclaimer: Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and all characters are property of NBC and Dick Wolf.
Archving: Only with the permission of the author.

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Lifetime: Pt. III – Resurrection

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When I return to the station house, Elliot tells me that Alex is up in the crib and has been looking and waiting for me for close to an hour. I ask him if she said why, but he only shakes his head and relays that she didn't say as he heads home.

When I get to the top step, I see her standing at the window looking down at the city. She's wearing a pair of jeans and a black ribbed turtleneck sweater. Her hair is pulled back into one of those loose ponytail/bun things she does, and those glasses, she's wearing those damn glasses. The sight of her wearing them has on occasion, more times than I'd care to admit, turned me into a bumbling idiot. I ache for her, to reach out to her, to touch her, feel her.

"Hey," I call out softly as to not startle her. "Elliot said you were looking for me."

She turns around slowly and sits down on the window sill, bracing her arms at her sides on the ledge. "Hey."

"Started snowing," she points out with a jerk of her head towards the window. I smile with a nod. I can't even form a simple sentence together because she looks as beautiful as the woman I had said goodbye to years ago, yet so different from what this life has dealt her. The street lights are sending a surprisingly soft glow into the shadowed room and I'm almost certain she's glowing. When she realizes I've been staring at her, she turns her eyes to the floor and hangs her head slightly, and I almost don't hear her whisper what she does.

"I've missed the way you look at me," she repeats and looks up as my jaw drops open. I fidget nervously.

"What way?" I finally find my voice which I'm desperately trying so hard to not let betray the stirring inside of me that had resurfaced the moment I first saw her again.

"Like that," she says simply. "You look at me like you see something others don't; like you can feel what I'm thinking; like you hear my most inner thoughts and secrets."

"Does it make you uncomfortable?" I ask.

"Of course not," she says with a small smile. "It makes me feel like no one else exists. I've missed that look."

For two people who had declared their feelings for one another through two kisses, we had been gliding through a dance of avoidance with one another ever since the day she step foot onto our crime scene. The past week had drained me. I had spent years repressing my feelings for her, denying them at times just to force myself to find a happiness that didn't involve her. But no matter what I did or who I was with, my heart always called out for her and only her. And when she appeared in front of me as if an apparition, I had felt a stab in my chest. Why hadn't she called? She told me she loved me. Why didn't she call? Had she gone back to Trevor? Did she decide she wasn't really gay? Or had she simply stopped feeling the same intense longing that I had seen in her eyes that time she sat across from me in the diner and told me she loved me?

"Why didn't you call?" I ask the one question that has been tormenting my mind the entire week.

She takes a deep breath, and stands up, turning back to look out the window. "When I last saw you, you were with Casey. I told you to be happy."

She finally turns around and faces me again. Even from the distance, I can see her eyes are glistening and she's trying hard to maintain her composure. "I wasn't ready to see you happy with someone else."

I feel my heart beat harder in my chest. "Casey and I broke up over a year ago."

She begins to move towards me in long casual strides until she's in my personal space. She starts to lean closer and I instinctively hold my breath. Then I realize what she's doing. She reaches down and picks up her coat from the couch beside me and then straightens her posture, but still inches away from me. Her eyes settle on my mouth and I see her swallow. She lifts her eyes and I hear her softly say, "Take me home."

I nod mutely, my eyes moving from her mouth back up into her dark blue eyes. As we make our way to the stairs I hear the guys settling down at their desks for the night. I stop at my desk to grab my coat off my chair and shrug it on. We walk out of the station house in silence, occasionally stealing glances at one another. When we get outside, the snow is falling harder than it had been when I had returned to the building earlier and the wind has picked up.

We stand side by side on the sidewalk and wait for a cab. I turn to look down the street on Alex's side and hold my hands in a fist up to my mouth and blew into them to warm them up. I'd forgotten my gloves at home. Alex looks at me and takes off the glove on her right hand. She reaches out and takes my right hand and slides her glove over it. With her bare hand, takes my left hand in hers and pulls her coat sleeve over top of our clasped hands. I watch her in silence as I feel my heart threaten to explode out of my chest. My eyes feel moist and I do all I can to control my emotions and prevent my eyes from welling up. She looks into my eyes and gives me a small and lazy smile. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a cab and hail for it with my free hand.

Without letting go of my hand, she climbs into the back seat, pulling me with her and proceeds to give the driver my address. I feel like I was sleep walking. I don't dare speak or make a sound lest I wake up from this dream. The entire ride to my apartment, we sit and look at one another wordlessly. There's so much to say yet neither one of us wants to disturb the silence. Her eyes are still as intense as the first day I met her, but in the cab, they're a dark shade of blue, her pupils dilated. She has a slight blush on her cheeks which I attribute to the cold temperatures we were standing in. Her lips are slightly parted, glistening with the lip gloss she's wearing. I see the minute movements of her chest and shoulders through her coat and can tell her breathing is growing heavier with each passing street block. I know my own heart is thumping in my chest and I have to concentrate on steadying my own breathing. She is the most beautiful creature I have ever laid eyes on.

Four years since I last saw her and last kissed her. Six years since our first kiss and she was taken away from my life. Seven years I've been in love with her. And now I sit before her, words escaping me. All I can do is tell her with my eyes, my gaze, my smile what she means to me. Her eyes tell me she knows what I'm feeling. They tell me that she never stopped thinking about me, no matter where she went or who she was with. I finally register the feeling of her thumb softly rubbing over my knuckles, concealed in her coat sleeve and I am once again overwhelmed with the love I've kept hidden for so long.

Finally we arrive at my building and before I know it, she's disengaged our hands, paid the driver and is once again pulling me to follow her out of the cab. We continue in silence in the elevator, her hand still holding onto mine. I let us into the apartment and toss the key onto the counter and kick the door closed. She still has my hand in hers and turns to face me , moving closer to me. She takes off her glasses and tosses them onto the counter beside the keys. I feel her body press up against mine and ever so slowly, she brushes her cheek against mine and buries her face into my neck. I wrap my free hand around her and bury my face in her neck. God she smells as heavenly as I had remembered. I can't help but notice how our bodies fit together so perfectly. Despite how well trained I am at keeping my emotions in check, when it comes to Alexandra Cabot, I have no control. Tears fall from my eyes and onto the porcelain skin of her neck. It is at that moment that I feel her tears on my own skin. Our bodies shudder from the release of the emotions we've so closely guarded all these years.

She reaches up with her left hand and tangles her fingers into my hair. She releases my hand and places her palm on my chest, over my rapidly beating heart. She slowly pulls her face away from the crook of my neck and rests her forehead against mine. The hand that was on my chest is now caressing my cheek and her fingers dance over my closed eyes, my nose, my lips and my chin. It's as if she needs to feel and know that this is not a dream either. She slowly rubs her thumb back and forth over my lips. I reach up and touch her face with my fingertips and I swear I felt a jolt of electricity when I touched her cheek. Her skin is still as smooth as ever. I wipe away the tracks of her tears and dance my fingers over her soft lips.

"I've missed you," she breaks the silence between us.

"I've missed you too," my breath brushing against her thumb. "I've missed the way you smell."

"I bought your perfume and sprayed it on my pillow."

I smile at the confession and feel her lips smile under my fingers. Slowly, she replaces her thumb with her soft, slightly parted lips in a chaste kiss. I kiss her back, equally chaste. We take our time to reacquaint ourselves with the feel of one another's lips in a flutter of innocent kisses until I feel her lips part a little more and her tongue requests my lips for entrance. Our tongues join in our reunion, in slow delicate strokes and movements. I cup her face with one hand while the other slides under her coat and wraps around her waist. She tangles both hands into my hair as our kiss slowly escalates with more hunger. There is no rush or hurried actions as we continue to savor the taste of one another, remembering what it felt like to kiss for the first time and last time. Somewhere in the middle of our kisses, we shed our coats and languidly begin to make our way into the living room, our lips never parting. If we were to race with a snail, the snail would win. She was back and she wasn't going anywhere. We had all the time in the world. Years of lust and yearning could be celebrated within minutes, but between us, was a lifetime of love that was finally allowed to be expressed.

When we reach the living room, the back of the couch bumps into the back of her legs and she simply sits down on it and I slide my body in between her legs and press my body to hers again. Nipping, licking, sucking, we rediscover the joys of teenage necking. I slide my hands under her sweater. As there are seven gates of hell, there must be seven gates of heaven. The first gate is the scent of her perfume on her neck. Kissing her is the second gate. The feel of her skin is the third. I lift her sweater up and pull it over her head, revealing a black lace bra, a contrast to her milky skin. She stands up, her mouth fuses with mine once more and she begins to move again, hooking her fingers into the waistband of my jeans and pulling me with her. As if I needed force to follow her.

Somehow, she manages to relieve me of my shirt as we continue to move through the living room. We make our way to the hallway towards the bedroom and she presses me against the wall, pinning my arms up against the wall and I surrender to her everything that I am. For the first time tonight, she breaks our kiss and begins to kiss my jaw and then my neck. She pulls my hands together above my head and holds them there with one hand while the other snakes around and unhooks my bra. She lowers my hands and slides the undergarment off. As the bra slides off my breasts, her mouth covers a nipple and a low moan escapes from within me. She strips the bra away completely and gives the other nipple a slow swirl and suck. With my hands free, I glide her backwards and unhook her bra before her back is pressed up against the opposite wall. My mouth hungrily claims hers once more, our bodies pressed together, flesh against flesh. The feel of her breasts against me sends electric signals straight to my clit. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the fourth gate of heaven.

I reach down and unbuckle her belt and jeans and slide my hands under the denim to grab hold of her ass. She responds by grinding her hips into mine and I let out another groan. I push her jeans off her hips and I extricate myself from her long enough for her step out of them and my body and mouth instinctively gravitates back to her again. She raises her bare left leg and hooks it around my own leg, trapping me against her. My hand grabs at her raised thigh pulling her hips against mine and I slide my hand up her leg and around behind her to cup her ass, feeling the lace of her panties under my fingers. I suck on her earlobe and kiss her neck. I feel her nails dig slightly into my back and I want her even more.

If ever I thought Alex and I could be sexually compatible, the idea was confirmed when I bend my knees to get leverage and she intuitively lifts her other leg and wraps both legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. Using the wall for support, I brace my arms under her and carry her the few steps into the bedroom. I manage to get us to my bed and I try to lower her as gracefully as I can onto the bed.

She sits on the bed, my lips still glued to hers, my hands planted on the mattress on either side of her and I feel her pulling at my waistband again. I pull off my badge, gun and holster and haphazardly stow them away onto the night table. She pulls me to her again and begins to unbuckle my belt and unbutton my jeans, her manicured nails tickling my abdomen. Her hands slide the denim over my hips. I reach down to help her remove the article of clothing and then lean back into her, forcing her to lie down onto the bed.

Before I know it, she has somehow rolled me onto my back and it was her turn to hover over me, her eyes dark and intense, full of lust. She pins my hands down as she brings her lips to mine again and then begins to move downwards along my neck. I feel her lips brushing along my skin, her tongue dashing out to lick here and there. One hand cups a breast and I gasp at the contact. My nipples are rock hard by now, as they had been since our embrace at the door, and ache for contact which her mouth gave. Her tongue swirls around one nipple and her lips suck on it arousing me even more. Her hand continues to massage and entertain my other breast and nipple as her mouth did things to the first breast that I had never dreamt of. She continues on downward and pulls at the waistband of my panties with her teeth and then slides the underwear down my legs and off onto the floor, leaving me completely naked. I don't feel the slightest bit exposed or vulnerable under her gaze. I feel more safe than I have ever before.

As Alex moves back up my body, my hands wander over her body by their own volition. She continues to tease my nipples with her talented lips and tongue while my hands caress her silky skin and curves. My desire for her threatens to explode if she continues her assault on my breasts. I need to feel her inside me.

"Alex, I need you. Now," I manage to get out as my breathing grows ragged.

She doesn't even hesitate and moves downwards, licking and kissing down my stomach, lower abdomen and then settles herself in between my legs. I'm so wet, I'm certain she can smell my arousal and desire. She places kisses along each inner thigh and when my hand snakes into her hair, she places her mouth onto me and slides her tongue into my folds.

"Oh God, Alex," I cry out at the contact and I swear she's smiling smugly. She finds my clit and gently sucks on it and I feel a quick tightening in my lower abdomen. She applies steady but light pressure with her mouth and I can't help but move and grind my hips against her mouth. She continues her soft broad licks alternating with gentle suction while my hips grind rhythmically. As I move harder and faster against her, I can feel the increased the suction on my clit. My breathing comes in rapid gasps and she knows I'm on the edge and she slides a finger into me, pushing in as far as her finger will go. She slides her finger in and out in rhythm with my bucking hips and I let go of the tighten sensations in my body, letting my orgasm take over as I cry out in a loud string of moans. She slowly eases up on the suction she had on my clit as I ride out the waves. Finally, my hips are motionless, and I'm catching my breath. She slides her finger out and licks the juices off of the digit with a smile. If this isn't a gate of heaven then God needs to have more orgasms.

"C'mere," I tug at her and smile. I pull her down for a kiss and lick my own juices from her mouth and tongue. "I taste good on you," I say smugly.

"Yes you do," she agrees with a Cheshire cat grin and leans down to kiss me again.

With lips still pressed together, I slowly sit up and guide her to straddle my lap. The move puts me in the most optimal position to fully appreciate her supple breasts. I run my hands along her sides and break away from the kiss. She reaches up and pulls out the hair tie that's been holding up her long tresses. She gives a shake of her head and her golden blonde hair cascades down her shoulders. I think that was one of the most sexiest things I have ever seen.

I start to kiss the breasts in front of me, purposefully avoiding the nipples and areolas. I place gentle but firm kisses on the sides, the top and the underside of both breasts. My hands have been running along her lower back and I slide them under the black lace material of her underwear to cup her firm cheeks, I latch my mouth to one nipple, my tongue running slowly and flatly against the hard point. I slowly trace lazy patterns around and over the nipple which elicits quite a few moans from the woman on top of me.

I slide the lace panties down her hips and she moves momentarily to discard of the skimpy piece of underwear. The loss of contact for the brief moment makes me ache for her warmth almost immediately. When she returns to straddling me, my mouth instantly finds its way back to the second breast. I wrap my arms around her slim hips and relish the feel of her soft skin. Simply put, I cannot get enough of touching and feeling her flesh. With my mouth still closed over a nipple, I slide a hand over her ass once again, only this time, I continue to move my hand down along her buttocks and then in between her legs. As warm as Alex's body already was, I felt even more heat between her legs; heat and moisture. I slowly dip a finger into her folds. This must be the final gate of heaven.

How long have I imagined and fantasized about this day, and finally it's here. The feelings, the sights, the smells were more than I could've ever dreamed up. I pull my hand away from her pussy and bring the finger to my mouth. I slide the wet finger into my mouth and suck off her wetness as she watches me. I lift my mouth to hers, and she captures it hungrily, tasting herself off my tongue. I give her a feral smile and lick in between her breasts and lowered my hand in between us. I cup her sex in my hand and then slowly slide a finger into her wetness. Alex raises her hips as I fill her with one finger, than two.

"Oh, Liv," the words escape her lips as I penetrate her.

With my fingers inside the woman above me and hearing her call my name, I feel myself grow wet again. I feel her hot flesh surround my fingers, the silky smoothness that's slick with juices. I lift my chin and her mouth meets mine. Our tongues explore and dance as she starts moving her hips, riding my fingers that are curled and stroking her G-spot.

I flatten the base of my hand against her clit which brings out a loud moan from somewhere deep within her chest. I move my attention back to her breasts and start to trace patterns over one nipple and feel her pace pick up. I stroke her G-spot with slightly more pressure while she grinds her pelvis faster and harder into my hand. The moans build and when she cries out in ecstasy, I feel her silky walls tighten around my fingers, gripping them. She continues to grind into my hand and I continue to stroke her until her movements slow down. Finally she opens her eyes and looks down into mine. She collapses on top of me and I lie back on the bed, pulling her down with me, her length partially on top of me, my one arm still around her waist.

"I love you, Olivia Benson," she whispers into the crook of my neck.

"I love you, Alex Cabot," I whisper back into her hair. "Welcome home."

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In the darkness, I sit in the chair beside the window, watching the moonlight stream through the glass panes and onto her sleeping form on the bed. If I strain hard enough, I can hear her even breaths in the still air. She's laying on the far side of the bed, facing me, her arms hugging the tangle of bed linens against her chest, one long leg draped over top of the covers. My eyes run along her length from her face, down her neck, over her shoulder, along her upper arm, down along the curvature of her waist and then up along her hip, down the smooth thigh and muscular calf. There isn't a thing that I don't love about this woman. From the blonde hairs on her head down to her perfectly pedicured toes. I could spend forever memorizing each curve, dip and swell of her body and still not get enough.

She stirs and I see her hand reach out to my side of the bed. She lifts her head and I can tell she's adjusting her eyes.

"What are you doing?" she asks in a hoarse whisper. God, even the sound of her post-coital voice turns me on.

"Just…memorizing you," I answer shyly.

"Come back to bed," she tells me and lifts up the covers. I don't need to be told twice. I slide under the covers and she nestles herself against me, her head on my shoulder, her hand on my breast.

"I'm not going anywhere," she tells me and plants a kiss on my cheek. I smile and close my eyes. I have waited so long for this day, and if fate means that we have to go through what we did in this lifetime to be here in this moment right now, I'd do all again in a heartbeat.

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End Pt. III – Resurrection

End of Story

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