WHO WILL KILL VOLDEMORT?
A collection of scenarios involving the different characters that may kill Voldemort. Suggestions? Comments? Ideas? Criticism? Review and share your wisdom with me.
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If HARRY kills him…
HARRY: You killed my parents! And my friend Cedric! And a whole lot of other people! You tore fmailies lives apart just for power! You're foul and evil, and it's time for you to die! This is for my parents! AVADA KEDAVRA!
(With lots of big whooshy noises and special effects, Voldemort dies and harry does a jig in his delight.)
If RON kills him…
RON: Voldemort you f****** ***hole! I'm going to F****** ***** kill you! Leave my friends alone you f******* ****** ***** ********* with a melon! AVADA F******* KEDAVRA!
(With lots of big whooshy noises and special effects, Voldemort dies and Ron whoops!)
RON: F******* YEAH! Woooh!
If HERMIONE kills him…
HERMIONE: So, it's come to this.
VOLDY: Indeed.
HERMIONE: I wish I didn't have to.
VOLDY: Hah- you think a Mudblood like yourself can stop me? You wouldn't have the power! You can never defeat me, Miss Granger, and you-
HERMIONE: (quietly furious) Avada Kedvra!
(With lots of big whooshy noises and special effects, Voldemort dies.)
HERMIONE: Hah! Mudblood indeed.
If HAGRID kills him…
HAGRID: Sic him, boys!
(An army of various creatures including the giant spiders, blast ended skrewts, Norbert and fluffy attack Voldemort and he is very quickly eaten.)
HAGRID: Ar, I always knew yeh had it in yeh. C'mon, let's go have a pint.
ARAGOG: indeed. Do they serve blood at the Leaky Cauldron?
If SNAPE kills him…
VOLDEMORT: You mudblood loving traitor! You dare call yourself a wizard? You're no better than Dumbledore.
(Snape doesn't say anything, merely gives Voldemort one of his most death-filled looks. With lots of whooshy noises and special effects, Voldemort dies.)
SNAPE: Pah. I never liked him.
If McGONAGALL kills him…
McGONAGALL: You dare to threaten Albus Dumbledore? Monster!
VOLDEMORT: Ah, shove it you old hag! You were my least favourite teacher!
McGONAGALL: (gasp) Such rudeness! DETENTION! AVADE KEDAVRA!
VOLDEMORT: AIIIIIEEEEEEEE! (Dies with much screaming about what a world it is and melting noises)
If MALFOY kills him…
MALFOY: Stuff you, Lord Voldemort! I'm ever so rich and MY dad's a minister, not a stupid muggle like yours was! Pooh, pooh!
VOLDEMORT: Oh god, he's right! (He kills himself in absolute despair.)
MALFOY: (in manner of Mr. Burns) Excellent…
If FRED and GEORGE kill him…
FRED: Try and curse while you're a canary, you old bastard! Quick, george! Hit him with a brick!
GEORGE: Threaten MY brother will you? (THUNK!) Ewww! That canary's blood got on my robes!
FRED: Gross.
If OLIVER WOOD kills him…
OLIVER: YAAAAAAAAARGH! YOU THREATEN MY STAR SEEKER, YOU DIE! I WANT HARRY ON PUDDLEMERE UNITED AS SOON AS HE'S OUT OF SCHOOL! DIE, FIEND! DIE IN THE NAME OF QUIDDITCH! (Oliver beats Voldemort to death with a broomstick.) Ahhhhh, much better.
If PERCY kills him
…PERCY: You realize that not only have you violated section (4c) of the Rules and regulations Regarding to respect for Wizardkind, but you have broken every rule in the Constitution for a Wizarding World at Peace, Furthermore, you have disrupted everyone schedule In the ministry. Do you realize we had to undertake a five week long search just to find you here? Not only that, you-
VOLDEMORT: oh god, just kill me already! No, wait- I'll do it. much faster. (Kills self in boredom.)
PERCY: oh. Jolly good.
If NEVILLE kills him…
NEVILLE: Oh, d-d-dear, I'm not rwslly sure how to d-do this…
VOLDEMORT: Ojh, just do it and get it over with you stupid boy!
NEVILLE: N-no, I'm serious, I d-don't know how to…
VOLDEMORT: of course you do, just point your wand and say it.
NEVILLE: Say wh-what?
VOLDEMORT: You know. The curse. Avada Kedavra.
NEVILLE: I j-just don't get it!
VOLDEMORT: Look, it simple. Aim your wand at me…
NEVILLE: Yes…
VOLDEMORT: Now, repeat after me "Avada"
NEVILLE: Avada…
VOLDEMORT: "Kedavra"
NEVILLE: Kedavra! Oh! (Voldemort dies.) Whoops. He was such a nice man, too.
If you have any other character you'd like to see kill the evil Dark Lord, then review and give me your suggestions! Thanks