Nate was quickly, if not already, to the realization that he was still irrevocably in love with Blair. The feelings he had hid since the night of prom had been slowly coming to surface ever since his and Vanessa's stop in Paris. He could be thinking of anything in that city but he chose to remember when Blair had suggested losing their virginities on a train to Paris. He was turned off by the idea at the time, be he knew he would have done it anyway, not just for the sake of sex, but he would do anything for her. So that night in the city of lights, he pushed Vanessa away, leaving her to later roam Europe on her own, while he walked the streets of Paris and got a train to take him to Harold and Roman's villa in southern France. He told them not to tell Blair that he had come, but he was sure that they did which may have explained the ten phone calls that he had received from her out of the blue the day after he had them waving at him from their terrace. He had ignored every call, hoping she would stop. Eventually she did, which is when the tears had started. But now, they were above the surface, bubbling over and spilling. It had only taken one surprise meet up that caused him to wear his emotions on his sleeve again.

After understanding what he wanted and needed to have in his life for it to mean or be worth anything he hurried over his closet trying to find anything that Blair would be impressed by seeing it. He felt that a suit was a bit too much, so he settled for a simple light indigo cotton tee and some khaki shorts. He stumbled over to his dresser to apply some Hermes Eau D'Orange Verte. It was Blair's favorite. He took one look into the mirror and saw his wide awake eyes glimmering back at him, shining at the anticipation of what would happen next. He found his leather flip flops beside his bed on the floor and slipped them on. As he sprinted down to the kitchen to look for his dad's car keys because his driver was off for vacation right now, a picture caught his eyes. It was from the summer of sophomore year. He and Blair were in an embrace, which from the looks of it looked like they didn't know they were being photographed. Their lips were lightly touching, with her arms around his neck and his own around her waist. Before he had a flashback to that he event he refocused on the task at hand, he found his dad's keys placed on the unnecessary key hook beside the desk where his mother kept her stationary. Dashing out toward the vintage hunter green Aston Martin, he revved up the car and began to pull out of the driveway.

As he arrived at the Waldorf home he noticed that there were about twenty cars parked. He found a slim parking space in front, but instead of getting out of the car, stepping into the lawn and finding Blair he stood his place. What if this was a mistake? What all this for nothing? He knew better than anyone that she would leave him at any chance to be with Chuck, well at least now she did. What if the fight he wanted to have was already won? What if the duel had already over and Chuck had won? He couldn't think these thoughts anymore; they would eventually drive him crazy and crash this car into another one of these cars here. He started to open the door, but one of the questions lingered in his head, what if the fight was over? She had obviously chosen and he bowed out gracefully with poise and grace that Chuck had never had. The known fact slowly brought him to the present where his head dropped onto the car wheel and the comprehension sent him swirling. He must have had his head down for a mere ten minutes before he heard her footsteps on the gravel driveway, quick and impatient.

"Nate?" He looked up from the windshield and saw her standing in front of him.

"Blair. What are you doing out here?" His eyes widened in shock as he took her in, she looked gorgeous. She was wearing a long, white dress that streamed around in the wind. Her hair was down in cascading waves that brushed her shoulders with her new cut.

"My mom is hosting another party for her clothing line debut at Barney's. Small, but you know how she can get, needed some air. What are you doing here?" Her eyes narrowed in curiosity.

"I actually needed to talk to you." He paused waiting for her reaction, but her face remained calm and expressionless, waiting for him to continue.

"Well, um, Blair, this is important. So, if you could I need you to listen closely," he sighed before he started, mentally preparing himself for rejection.

"Oh, did you get my gift, Nate? I hope it helps with the burn." Her hands her left at her side, but she kept wiping them on her dress as if they were clammy, Blair's hands never got clammy.

"Yeah, I did actually. Which is why I am here,"

"To thank me for the cream? That's a bit odd; you could have just called or sent a text." Her eyebrows furrowed again wondering why Nate was being so personal right now.

"I know that, but there was something else that I wanted to say to you. Look, I know that I had let you go, but it was a mistake. I just-"

Before finishing his profession of love to Blair, Nate saw Chuck gradually making his way across the jewel toned grass towards them.

"Just what, Nate?" He just behind her and she followed what his eyes were fixed on, in which she saw Chuck. She looked back at him once more before Chuck go to them.

"Blair. I was looking for you everywhere. No one could find you. I was worried." He hastily kissed her cheek, making Nate wince. They matched perfectly, well it was hard not to match a white dress, but Chuck was clad in a light grey suit, a light purple linen shirt underneath the open jacket. Their dark eyes wore different emotions, each so distinct. His hair was slicked back and a slightly different from the last time he had seen him, in contrast her hair was slack and easily thrown into her face. He longed to reach out and touch her smooth, pearly skin and run his hands through her glossy hair. They both jus stared at him before Blair responded.

"Oh, I just needed some fresh air. I hope you weren't too worried." She looked up to his face and gave a small smile.

"Nate, I hope you didn't think that you would come into the party dressed like that. I know that you don't like the whole scene, but you could at least look like you give a shit." Chuck's eyes made a path down Nate's outfit, scrutinizing it in his mind. He had never paid mind to his outfits before, but now all he could do was judge. Obviously he hadn't come here for the dinner, something else had him here.

"He just came here to thank me for giving him some good cream to help the healing of a severe burn."

"Oh, I suppose that he already said thank you, so why don't we go join you mother inside?" He began to turn her body and they started to walk away. As they stalked away from a Nate, Blair looked over her shoulder at Nate and gave him an unfathomable look, then turned her head up as if Chuck had something. She smiled brightly and wrapped her arm around his waist as if they were the perfect couple. Nate's forehead creased and the shredding sound of a heart filled his ears as the salt water began to empty onto his sweaty face. After this shedding of tears, he vowed himself never to shed a single tear over Blair Waldorf again. He didn't want to cry for her, when there was nothing left to gain, left to lose, or nothing left to do.