as i run my hands through your hair; promise not to slip away.

"How bad is he?" she asked, the tears flowing stubbornly, despite her wishes for them not to.

"He's as good as he can be in this situation, detective," the doctor replied.

Kate's teeth clenched in anger at the response she received.

"Which is what, exactly, doctor? Care to elaborate any?" She was taken aback herself by the venom that spewed out of her mouth, but she didn't care.

Not right now.

"Well, he's alive, if that's what you're asking," the doctor answered, surprisingly calm in a situation as precarious as this.

"He's lost a lot of blood, detective," he continued, sensing the need for more answers, "We're giving him more as we speak, but it may not help. I need to warn you that he may not make it unless he's a fighter."

Kate's fists curled in anger at the negativity that this doctor was emitting. She could punch him right then and there; she certainly had the badge to make it legal. Her limbs shook as she held back, her emotions waging a war deep within her.

"I can understand what you're feeling right now," he said as he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

She shook it off before gazing sternly at the doctor.

"Can you?" she asked, fury burning on the underside of each word. "Have you ever had a man shadow you on a case? Have you ever experienced the feeling of not being able to protect someone when they were being shot at?"

The doctor gazed at the floor, biting his lip in silence.

"I didn't think so," Kate continued curtly. "So don't you dare tell me you know what I feel like, because you do not. And I pray that you never will."

She turned swiftly on her heel, her mouth pursed into a very angry line, as she walked away towards the hospital room. She pressed a hand against the cold door handle.

"Excuse me, ma'am, you can't go in there," a nurse shouted. Beckett reached into her pocket and flashed her badge at the nurse.

Misuse of that thing was not something she was ashamed of at the moment.

She opened the door, and almost wishes she had heeded the nurse's warning. On the hospital bed laid Richard Castle, meek under the covers. He looks so weak, Kate thought, as she stared at the abundance of tubes and machines that were hooked to him. She stifled her tears as her eyes fell upon his body; it was so still she had to double check that he was still breathing. He looked so small, so fragile, as if even her touch would break him into a million little pieces. She looked at his body, her eyes settling on the bandaged wound on his bare chest. She walked towards the bed, placing a finger on the corner of the bandage, rubbing soothingly up and down the exposed part of his chest. She nearly fell backwards when he began to speak.

"Getting freaky at a hospital, eh?" he whispered quietly, a small smirk appearing on his exhausted lips.

"But hey, if it works for you," he continued, before puckering his lips animatedly, preparing for a kiss.

Instead, Kate laid a finger across his lips. "Shhhh," she demanded. "You don't need to do this."

Castle's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Do what?" he asked.

"Be funny," Kate replied. "You don't need to be funny for me right now."

Castle closed his eyes as he understood.

Kate found herself running her hand through his hair gently, comforting the man that she knew she couldn't live without. Over and over her fingers ran through the messy ruffles of brown hair as Castle fell asleep beneath her touch.

She realized he had fallen asleep, and bent down to his face, placing a soft kiss upon his forehead. She slowly straightened, gazing at Castle's peaceful face, etching the picture into her memory. She turned away, and proceeded to walk out, but a weak hand restrained her from leaving.

"Stay," Castle demanded, as his eyes opened in awareness, and his fingers clasped around Kate's wrist. Her head turned to him in surprise, as he attempted to smile. Kate nodded before walking back to his bedside, placing a hand across his cheek, rubbing it soothingly with her thumb. Her hand once again found its way in the ruffles of his hair as she ran through it.

Neither shifted as darkness fell into the hospital room.

Kate was thankful though, for the night.

Under its shade, he could not see her tears.