The courtroom was large and elegant with a beautiful marble floor and mahogany furniture. L stood in the dock dreading what chaos would unfurl. The King & Queen of Hearts sat at the bench the Queen was admiring herself in a mirror while the King just twirled his white hair his staff was leaning against his throne. L sighed he wanted to go home so much. He leaned over to one of the cards who looked like Aizawa standing by the dock. "Excuse me" he whispered. The card looked up. "Am I really going to have my head cut off?" the card shrugged
"There are a lot of executions scheduled in Wonderland but very few actually take place. When the Queen isn't looking the King secretly pardons some people of course this doesn't always happen for example with the duchess" he said
"Who's the duchess?" asked L but was interrupted by the sound of the bugle which the White Rabbit played as he entered the court. The White Rabbit brushed his light brown fringe and stroked his white ears before taking out a scroll. "*ahem* your majesties, members of the jury and loyal subjects. The prisoner is charged with enticing her majesty the beloved Queen of Hearts into a game of croquet followed by teasing, tormenting and otherwise…."
"Never mind all that! Get to the part where I lose my temper" demanded the Queen impatiently. The White Rabbit swiftly looked down the long list.
"And there by causing the Queen to lose her temper." The Queen smiled
"Now then are you ready for your sentence?" she said fluttering her eyelashes
"Sentence? But there must be a verdict first" L insisted
"Sentence first, verdict afterwards" she smiled sweetly
"But that isn't the way…"
"ALL WAYS ARE…"
"Your ways, your majesty" said L politely curtsying in his little blue dress
"Yes my dear" giggled the Queen flicking her long blonde hair back. "OFF WITH…."
"Consider my dear. We've called no witnesses" interrupted the King the Queen sulked
"Oh alright but get on with it" she whined
"Call the first witness" ordered the King
"First witness, the March Hare!" called out White Rabbit. Two of the cards escorted A the brown eared, golden blonde boy to the front. He sat in the witness box and straightened his big bow tie. "What do you know of this unfortunate affair?" asked the King
"Nothing" said the March Hare
"Nothing whatever?!" shouted the Queen
"Nothing whatever!" A shouted back at her
"That's very important. Jury take note of that" the Queen ordered
Sheesh what next?
"Next witness" ordered the King
"The Mad Hatter" called out White Rabbit and in strutted Mad Hatter. He bowed and sat on the ledge of the witness box next to the March Hare. "I'm dead" L said to himself
"Where were you when this horrible crime was committed?" asked the King
"I was home drinking tea" said Mad Hatter taking off his oversized red & black hat and taking a cup of tea that was balancing on top of his scruffy jet black hair. "Today is my beyond-birthday ya know" he said putting his hat back on and taking a sip of tea. The King turned to the Queen. "My dear today is your beyond-birthday too"
"It is" she smiled
"It is" said the Mad Hatter & March Hare in unison and started singing. "A very merry beyond-birthday"
"To me?" she sung. L put his head in his hands as they continued to sing their beyond-birthday song. He was starting to get a headache. By the end of the song though the Queen was happy. L put his thumb to his lips hoping that now she was happy she'd drop the charges. Than a familiar smile appeared on the back of the Queen's throne and a familiar purple & pink body formed. "Oh your majesty, look there he is now"
"Huh? What? Who?" asked the Queen looking around
"The Cheshire Cat" moaned L pointing
"CAT!!" screamed the Queen and accidentally knocked her beautiful crown off. It fell to the floor and crashed. She screamed with horror. L put his hands in the pockets of his apron and pulled out the pieces of the mushroom he had gotten earlier. "The mushroom, I completely forgot" he said but couldn't remember which piece was which. L panicked and ate both pieces of the mushroom at once.
"OFF WITH HIS…" the Queen stopped shouting when L suddenly grew he bumped his head on the ceiling again but that didn't matter to him. He looked down and saw the cards jabbing him. L picked up and handful of them. "I'm not afraid of you. You're nothing but a pack of cards" he said and chucked them away. L looked coldly down at the stunned courtroom. "Rule 42 all persons more than a mile high must leave court immediately" ordered the King who was the only person in the room whose expression hadn't changed.
"I'm not a mile high and I'm not leaving" L insisted crossing his arms grumpily
"Sorry rule 42" said the Queen nervously
"As for you your majesty. You're not a Queen you're just an annoying, vain, self-centred, bad tempered sleaze bag" he said not realizing until it was too late that he was shrinking to his normal size. The Queen put on an evil smile.
"What was that you were saying?" she asked looking at the worried L. Then Cheshire Cat appeared behind her taking a bite of his chocolate. "Well he simply said that you're an annoying, vain, self-centred, bad tempered sleaze bag" he laughed
"OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!" screamed the Queen this time the King didn't try to stop her. L bolted he ran as fast as he could. Chased by a vast army of cards and the King & Queen of Hearts. L tripped but instead of falling onto the ground he found his surroundings had changed now he was suddenly running along a table. There were tea pots whistling and the Mad Hatter & March Hare tried to stop L. "Wait a minuet you can't leave a tea party without having a cup of tea insisted the mad hatter."
"I can't stop now" said L looking back and seeing the cards and the Queen catching up on him
"Ah but we insist you must join us in a cup of tea" said the March Hare as they threw poor L into a giant tea cup. L found himself swimming desperately in a pool of tea. Strange objects were floating everywhere. Then L saw a familiar figure in front of him floating on a mushroom. "Matt! I mean Mr Caterpillar what should I do?"
"Who R U?" asked the caterpillar blowing smoke in L's face. L found himself floating in the smoke closely followed by the cards and Queen. He saw the door with Watari's face as a door handle and tried to open it but couldn't. "Ouch!!" yelled the door handle
"Open up" said L panicking
"You sure? You told me to shut up earlier and that's what I did" said the door handle
"But the Queen I must get out"
"But you are out"
"What?"
"See for yourself" said the door handle opening his mouth. L looked through and saw himself snuggled up in his chair.
"What? I'm asleep" L turned around he could hear the Queen continuously screaming 'off with his head' L bit his lip and started yelling through the door. "Ryuzaki wake up. Please wake up Ryuzaki. Ryuzaki!" he shut his eyes and kept telling himself to wake up. The next time he opened them he found himself in his arm chair with Light shaking him gently. "Ryuzaki wake up" said Light. L looked down at himself he was wearing his normal white shirt and blue jeans instead of the little blue dress and apron that he hated. "Huh? What happened?" asked L
"You had a sugar crash and fell asleep" explained Light.
L lay back in his favourite arm chair. I hate it when that happens but I've never had a sugar crash quite as strange as that he thought to himself smiling.
A/N: Yep I know its been ages since I updated but it's finally finished. Hope you all enjoyed it and thanks for waiting. Luv ya all xxx.