A/N: I have no idea where this came from. 8D

I took heavy liberties with factual events and I realize this, so please don't bother to review simply to tell me about it. xD It wouldn't work otherwise, okay? I like it this way.

Disclaimer- I don't own Death Note, or a Death Note. D:

As Raito held her, he couldn't help but realize how good it felt. Safe, secure… and right. And he couldn't help but let these thoughts linger for a moment before roughly pushing them aside and regaining his calm. And later, as he sat at his desk with the Death Note open before him, he couldn't help but glance over to the spot at the center of the room where he had embraced her and remember.

As Raito kissed her, he couldn't help but notice how soft her lips were, and how delicate her shoulders felt under his touch. He couldn't help his right hand tightening its grip ever-so-slightly, or his left twining through her hair. He couldn't deny the urge to prolong the connection, same as he couldn't help wishing he were different. But as he once again shook these thoughts away, as his mind was once again dominated by Kira, he quickly discarded the possibility of anything other than façade existing there and whispered the according words to her. And as she embraced him and whispered that she would try to make him love her, something in him twanged.

Sometimes, when no one was paying attention, his act of boyfriend would drop and he would sneak glances at her of his own volition. He would notice habits of hers that even she probably didn't know about; he would examine the features of her face from afar as long as the Kira side of him allowed him to. Always, however; always, before she turned to him he would look away, never betraying a thing, always stoic, expression unchanged. She would turn away, disappointed, and something inside him would twang again.

So it was no surprise to him when, as he lay there dying and sensed, rather than saw or heard, her preparing to jump, he called out her name. When she turned to the sound of his voice and he saw her face, it was all he could do to mouth three words at her before losing all strength. Her widening eyes and the tears pooling in them were the last things he saw before he slipped away, satisfied to have at last done away with all pretense.

I love you…