"- and then Swindle said: 'Because Swindle is the best, most powerful Mini-con in the universe!"

Starscream tossed back his helm and gave in to deep-chested laughter. His partner, the red Mini-con called Swindle, sat on his shoulder, his tiny body pressed into the large vents on the Seeker's back. Starscream narrowed his optics softly and opened his mouth to reply when:

"Hey, Starscream!"

The red duo, who secretly called themselves superior to the wishy-washy, soft-sparked Autobots, turned to gaze in the direction of the shout. Smokescreen and Hotshot were bent over a large and battered looking piece of equipment, with the Mini-con Sparkplug between them. Starscream halted and balled his hands into fists, for he was in no mood to listen to their drivel.

"What!?" Starscream shouted, his voice breaking in the middle just as expected. The Mini-con on his shoulder echoed the demand by standing and placing his hands on his hips.

"We saw Skyfire leaving your quarters early this morning," Smokescreen instigated, narrowing his optics in suspicion.

"Are you guys updating each other's warranties or what?" Hotshot finished, sending the trio into bouts of laughter which forced them to double over.

"That's-" Starscream began, feeling the energon heat up behind his face-plate, giving his cheeks a soft glow and making his optics flare almost violet. "That's none of your business, Auto-brats!" The heat behind his faceplate only worsened when Hotshot declared 'It's true!' and the laughter rose in pitch and continued.

Swindle would stand for no more of this mockery of Starscream! Bracing himself as the Seeker's vents began to heat-up, vibrate and hum with emotion; the Mini-con lifted both arms in a crude gesture.

"Keep it up and Swindle will void all of your warranties!" He declared. "No updates necessary! Lo~ow main-ten-ence!"

Not to be out-done by the fiery Swindle, Sparkplug turned around and gave his own crude gesture - this one involving one hand and his aft. He then beeped a roughly translated version of: 'Come and get it!'

Starscream started forward, intent on teaching them all a lesson, when his audios registered the softest 'click' and 'swoosh' of metal plates from his shoulder. He turned to look and caught the tilt of Swindle's helm as the Mini-con peered down at himself, utterly bewildered. Following his gaze Starscream saw the origin of the sound and his faceplate lit up in embarrassment as he quickly looked in the other direction. A panel so low on Swindle's body it was practically between his legs, had slid open to reveal a set of colorful, interlocking cords and wires. In the center of this puzzle-like panel there was a small opening encased in soft, pliable cods, and just above this a tiny and almost fleshy protrusion. The whole panel was pulsing with a lightish red (though not quite pink) glow, which was also slightly visible from between the cracks in Swindle's armor.

"We're leaving!" Starscream bellowed, well aware that the laughing trio had not heard him.

"Swindle feels... strange , Starscream." The Mini-con beeped worriedly. He relaxed a little as Starscream reached up and took him gently into his large hand.

"I know. Give me a minute, I'll find you someplace ... private ."

"What for?" Beeped the confused con.

"Slag!" Hissed Starscream as he carefully transformed and took off.

~*~

"Alright Swindle," Starscream said in a half-playful, half-commanding voice, "mind telling me what happened back there?" He finished, now with a smirk on his faceplate. He was curious (now that the initial shock of seeing his Mini-con partner sexually aroused had passed) and wanted to know exactly what (or Primus forbid, who ) had elicited such a response from Swindle.

He'd flown them a good distance away from the Autobot base, seeking privacy he knew he'd never get under the suspicious optics of his once enemies. He'd landed in a large, somewhat deep (yet narrow) ravine and was now seated in a U shape between the walls. It was a tight fit, but it was strangely comfortable at the same time. He rested his left elbow on a small nook in the wall and then placed his chin against its fist. The Mini-con being questioned stood in the palm of his right hand. Optic-level with the Seeker, the Mini-con shrugged.

"If Swindle knew, Swindle would tell you." He beeped, confused and now just slightly apprehensive.

"Your panel opened." Starscream offered, sounding eager for gossip. The Mini-con looked down and touched the now-closed panel gently.

"Yes." Swindle said, still confused. "It has never done that before..."

"Wha-what!?" Starscream yipped, starting so suddenly he threw the Mini-con off balance, sending him to his aft in the Seeker's palm.

"Is Swindle malfunctioning ?" The bot beeped, slow and worried.

"No. You're not malfunctioning." Starscream said, regaining his composure. He narrowed his optics slightly. "You've really never had that happen before?" Swindle shook his head. "Even back on Cybertron?"

"Swindle was not active on Cybertron."

"Explain." Starscream cocked his head far to one side.

"Not all Mini-cons were activated on Cybertron; some of us were dormant the whole time. We were supposed to be activated, but the other Mini-cons decided to leave before that could happen. Then we boom-crashed on this planet. Swindle was activated for the very first time by Starscream! Those Mini-cons who left Cybertron before they were ever activated have to scan a Cybertronian partner before they can go online. Mini-cons who were active on Cybertron don't have to."

Starscream gaped for a long while before forcing a smirk through. He poked Swindle gently in the chest with his pinky finger. The Mini-con cocked his helm to the side.

"That's good to know."

"Now it's Starscream's turn to explain!" The excited Mini-con declared as he grabbed the Seeker's finger.

"Mmm?" Starscream hummed.

"Why did Swindle's panel open?" The Mini-con watched as the large Cybertronian made a series of faces Swindle was sure he would never see again. Once Starscream settled on an expression his faceplate lit up with hot energon. He rubbed at his temples for a moment before letting out a sigh and turning off his optics for a nano-second.

"Are you serious, Swindle? You don't know ... why it opened?" The Seeker groaned as Swindle shook his head, unaware of how uncomfortable he'd made his partner. Starscream looked up towards the darkening sky above.

"Well... I, uh, don't know what exactly made it open, bu-but it opens when you, um, want to... bond."

"Bond?"

"Mate! Make love! Have sex!" Starscream yipped, faceplate almost completely maroon with hot energon. The small Swindle looked confused for a nano-second more before, at last, giving a soft nod to show he understood.

"But Starscream," he piped up quietly, "Swindle was not thinking about bonding, not even close." The Mini-con bobbed slightly as Starscream shrugged.

"Sometimes your body is even when you aren't." He offered, looking thoughtful for a moment. "There are probably just certain things that you like that your body relates to bonding."

"Swindle does not like the idea of not being in control of Swindle's own body." The bot beeped, placing his hands on his chest-plate in worry.

"Me either." Starscream mumbled.

"Teach Swindle how to stop this from happening, Starscream!"

"I can't do that, Swindle. It's next to impossible to stop it, it's a reaction linked almost directly to your primary functions. You can't really turn it off or stop it."

"Oh," Swindle whimpered, defeated, "then... Swindle just has to wait for it to close? It took a very long time to do that... and Swindle couldn't think about anything else while it was open."

"Well you don't have to wait for it to close on its own, you can fix it."

"Fix it? So it is a malfunction?"

"No! It - arrg..." Starscream covered his faceplate with a hand and momentarily turned off his optics. Did all Cybertronians have this 'talk' with their Mini-cons? It made him feel like a father, which turned his chassis cold and made him feel queasy. Firing up his optics he saw Swindle looking at him patiently. The Seeker sighed deeply.

"You can... Kind of.. trick it into thinking you're bonding." He offered.

"How?" The Mini-con responded.

Starscream grumbled and looked away, feeling his spark fare up at the question. Something then occurred to him and he paused for a moment. Was that a natural thought to have? Is that how fathers explained it? How had it been explained to him? Was it wrong to think such a thing? Was it normal? He tilted his helm to the side upon realizing it probably didn't matter anyway. If it was perverted well, it was fitting, wasn't it? Starscream, by no choice of his own, had been subjected to all kinds of perversions. It was only natural that it was the first solution that came to mind. No-one would ever know, and even if they did find out... So what? Starscream would just strut past; they weren't strong enough to survive what he'd been through in four million years. He might be perverted but he was also vastly superior.

"It would be easiest for me to just show you, Swindle."

"Show Swindle?" The Mini-con asked, a little apprehensively as Starscream lifted him up so that he could reclaim his seat inside the Seeker's vents.

"Just, sit and watch." Starscream almost growled, feeling cords and wires low in his midsection begin to twist and knot. He leaned back further against the ravine as he felt the Mini-con shift until he was comfortable in the large vent. Starscream reached up and rubbed his helm with his right hand, leaving the other laying lazily on his cockpit. In order for this to work properly he would have to try and forget he was being watched. He shut his optics off-line and let his right arm hang lazily, propped up slightly against a small rock.

Swindle was about to speak up and ask what was going on when Starscream's vents began to hum and vibrate. This confused the Mini-con a great deal, for he knew the vents only reacted like that when Starscream was highly emotional. He straightened up and leaned out of the vent, peering over at his partner's faceplate in confusion. What he saw did not answer his questions, however. Starscream's optics were completely off-line; his helm was tilted back slightly and his mouth was parted just the smallest bit. This corners of his lips twitched downward slightly and the screens over his optics quivered inwardly, giving him an almost pained expression. The Mini-con frowned and reached out to touch his partner's helm, but froze as his audios were jostled by the sound of Starscream's panel clicking open.

Though feeling slightly embarrassed, Swindle knew Starscream was only showing him how to ... Fix his panel problem, so he looked carefully. Starscream's panel was just as similar to Swindle's as it was different. It looked fundamentally the same, but the pieces weren't locked as tight, they shook and vibrated against each other and most of them were scratched and dented. The wires along the small opening were all patched up and some of them looked like they had been completely replaced; they were different colors and textures than the others. The glow that pulsed inside the panel was a deep maroon and pulsed hesitantly, without rhythm. Swindle sat back down slowly as Starscream's vocals whimpered softly.

... and Skyfire's hands, Primus he had big hands. I could practically feel them on my cockpit... exploring. He was a scientist through and through, even when it came to bonding. He seemed to enjoy nothing more than finding new places to exploit... But I felt comfortable around him, even now after all this time, after all I'd been through. Last night... mmmm... He practically hummed with excitement, vibrating and, heh, moaning... I missed feeling like I was participating...

Swindle made a barely audible beep as Starscream balled his right hand into a fist, the left falling to brush his panel. The Mini-con craned his neck a little, feeling his energon heat up, his panel almost... itch? No, that wasn't the right word. It ached and Swindle recognized the strange urge, so he wasn't the least bit startled or confused when his panel moved aside. He looked at it for a moment, energon growing warmer still, then turned his attention back to Starscream for further instruction.

The large Cybertronian had splayed three fingers over his opening, his thumb and forefinger had wrapped in a circle around the base of his protrusion. Tilting his helm back further and parting his lips enough to let out a deep gasp, Starscream squeezed tighter around the base of his piece. He bent in his fingers softly and began prodding at the pliable walls of his hole, wincing every now and again.

... and Skyfire's lips were on my throat, biting playfully at the soft and sensitive wires. He had a hand on my waist and one stroking my wings. His weight felt good, comforting; but he was holding back, going easy on me. Partly I was relieved because I wanted nothing more than to connect with Skyfire like I used to... and I feared if he'd given me his all from the start that I'd have lost it. He'd rubbed his panel against mine, and I'd quivered... moaned...

Swindle jumped slightly as Starscream let out a deep moan, tilting his helm to the side and biting down on his bottom lip. The Mini-con powered down his optics just slightly, giving him a hazed gray view of the world as he began working his fingers around his panel like Starscream was doing. The nano-second he made contact with the area his knees buckled and he nearly collapsed inside his partner's vent. He managed to catch himself, not wanting to jolt Starscream out of his 'trance', and eased down into a kneeling position. He paused for another nano-second more before returning his hand to the panel. He was almost prepared for the sensation, but it still shocked his systems. He worked a small finger around the opening of his hole, surprised at how warm and lubricated it was. He began to hum with pleasure, vibrating against Starscream's vent.

Starscream made another small noise as he gave up on his piece and thrust the whole of his forefinger into his opening. Hot breath caught in his throat and he arched far enough to put space between his wings and the ravine. He let out a long groan, then hissed in a long, cool breath.

He was huge, no, gigantic... everywhere. When we had first bonded I had been scared, apprehensive, upon witnessing his size. Not wanting to hurt me any more than I wanted to be hurt, we'd taken things nice and slow. Last night I'd been more than ready, maybe because I knew I could take it, or maybe because of what I'd been subjected to, in any case... It had been amazing. The feeling of him so completely inside me after so long... Indescribable.

Swindle made a cooing noise that sounded almost more like a human had made it than a Mini-con as he continued to mimic Starscream's actions. He couldn't have been prepared for the feeling of something so deep inside his panel. He beeped softly as he prodded at the warm wires now tight around his finger. He squirmed in his position, further adding to the friction in his low panel. He felt his lower wires (not the ones currently wrapped around his finger) tighten and heat up. He felt suddenly anxious, and a strange urge began to boil inside him - though an urge to do what he wasn't sure.

Starscream pressed in another finger and began to slowly scissor them between the wires. He lifted his other hand to his faceplate and bit down hard on the knuckles of his first and second fingers. He could feel the pressure building up just behind the interlocking pieces of his panel. He despised pushing himself into overload...

His optics had been offline pretty much since he'd penetrated me, but I kept mine online. I watched the expressions on his faceplate as he attempted (with no success) to find and hold a rhythm. His mouth worked as if he was trying to say something, but all he'd done was moan and hiss in pleasure... He was so warm I could see steam rising between us...

Swindle arched his back and stretched out his legs. He almost curled into himself and brought his legs back up to his chest. He tossed back his helm and stretched out the right, holding the knee of his left tightly with his free hand. His wires felt like they were knotted up so badly he'd never untie them. The energon powering his circuits was hot and it pumped fast. His spark was pulsing frantically, making his whole body glow. His optics powered up almost on their own, only to suddenly flash white as every metal inch of the Mini-con overloaded. He made a strange sound, not unlike the discordant howl of a pack of wolves, then collapsed.

Starscream made an odd, hiccup like noise and withdrew his fingers, leaving overload unachieved. Cockpit rising and falling as he drew in cold air to cool his core, he forcibly shut the panels on his lower armor with his hand, biting back a pained cry. He let both of his arms fall limp as he turned his optics back online. Willing away the sensation of coming so close only to be left unsatisfied, he focused in on his audios. After a nano-second he was able to pick up on the sound of his exhausted partner, part-way through a painless manual shutdown he'd activated after his first full-system overload.

The Seeker stood carefully, bracing himself against the ravine wall.

He felt a little better about what he'd just done as he listened to the rhythmic beeping of his Mini-con. If it was perverted, that was, sickeningly, alright with him. He'd helped Swindle in the only way he knew how, and hopefully that would be enough. Rumors and Autobots be damned.